I don't own Merlin. (Sadly.)

Summary: After discovering a shocking truth, Merlin leaves Camelot with Arthur believing because Hunith is very ill. After receiving letters over the growing weeks that Hunith is getting worse, Imagine the shock when a healthy Hunith turns up in Camelot informing the Prince it is Merlin who's dying.

This has romance, friendship, angst in the middle but a happy ending :D

This is malexmale. It has eighteen chapters in total. A chapter a day :D

Thank you to Forevercullen with the help of the title. x

This story is for, and dedicated to my very good friend cathcer1984. SHE PASSED! I am so happy for her. x :D

I apologise in advance for any mistakes I may have made :D


A few days after Arthur had talked with Merlin, his servant seemed to be his usual self again, laughing and joking their usual banter and name calling which Arthur was happy to hear.

Arthur was walking to his chambers when he saw someone turn a corner in front of him and smiled when he saw that it was Merlin. Carrying his clothes, he saw something from the pile of clothing drop and how Merlin balanced the pile on one hand as he bent down and picked it up. Arthur frowned when Merlin stood up straight, he was swaying. "Merlin."

Merlin turned quickly to see Arthur hurrying over to him and Arthur jumping forwards with his arms out was the last thing he saw before all went black.

Merlin woke up and found himself on Arthur's bed with the Prince leaning over him, his blue eyes full of worry. "Arthur?"

"Oh Merlin thank god. I panicked when I saw you falling, I only just caught you. Let me go and get Gaius."

"No Arthur." Merlin sat up and swung his legs over the edge of the bed. "I'm fine."

"You didn't look it."

"I didn't but I am fine now, honestly Arthur give me five minutes and I will be right as rain."

Arthur looked at Merlin closely. "This has happened before hasn't it."

"It might have."

"Merlin why didn't you say."

"Because you are my master not my mother. I don't have to tell you everything."

"You do when you demand that I tell you everything that goes on with me."

"That is different."

"Why is it?"

"Because it is my destiny to protect you."

"And as your friend it is my job to protect you. Please Merlin, let me get Gaius to check you over."

"He already has Arthur. I am just not very well at the minute but if I keep taking my potions it will pass."

"Then why didn't it work now."

"Because it has been a busy morning and I forgot to take it."

"Merlin I don't care if it makes you late or how busy a morning we have. I want you to take the potion before you wake me."

"I will Arthur."

"You promise?"

"I promise."


Over the next few days Merlin had gone through his spell books and did all kinds of magic on himself to see what was wrong with him but nothing worked, he finally gave up on his magic books and started to read through one of Gaius' books, trying to find the symptoms he had.

When he finally found them he gasped at what they meant. Pregnant? He couldn't be. He was a man. He put back Gaius' book and that night he went down to the vaults and into the secret passage he found years ago where a lot more magic books were kept. It was in one of these books that he found his answer. Truth was he could get pregnant. If he was very powerful. Which he was, and in love with the man who he had sex with, and hoping he could see a future with that man. His own magic would create what he needed to carry a baby. Just when Merlin thought he understood it all about magic, this gets thrown at him.

Merlin sat there for a while and thought. He was pregnant with Arthur's child. But Arthur said to forget it and carry on as normal. He couldn't tell Arthur for he remembered what Arthur told him that night on their way to his chambers. He was going to marry Princess Olivia. He was in love with her. Merlin telling Arthur that he was pregnant, would change everything, Arthur would do what was expected of him and look after Merlin and his child. Staying and looking after them both whilst still in love with Princess Olivia.

Merlin found he couldn't put Arthur through that. In the end Merlin knew that there was only one thing he could do. He had to leave Camelot. And soon.


It had been four weeks since that night and Merlin knew he had to be home within eight weeks in case he started to show early or started to show any more signs that gave away that he was pregnant.

He got a story all worked out that would let people believe that he had to be away so long but he knew Gaius wouldn't believe it so he sat down and told Gaius the truth. "Oh my boy." the old man whispered as he pulled Merlin into a hug.

"I'm sorry Gaius. I should never have let it happen."

"You have nothing to apologise for Merlin."

"I do Gaius. I let my shield down and let Arthur in and now it has gotten me pregnant and forced to return home."

"You could always tell Arthur."

"You know I can't. No. I will stick to the story that my mother is ill and you have sent me home with potions to help her, which are actually for me and I will be nursing my mum whilst father works in the field as he can't do both."

"You will give my best to Hunith and Balinor won't you."

"I will Gaius." Merlin sighed and stood up. "Now comes the hardest part."

"Telling Arthur you are leaving?"

"Yep. Wish me luck."

"You are going to need it Merlin because Arthur won't want you to go. Nor will Gwaine or Percival. None of us really my boy."

"I know Gaius."


Arthur looked up from his documents. "Enter." he watched the door open and was surprised to see it was Merlin. "Merlin? You never knock. What's wrong?" he asked when he saw Merlin looked nervous, which made him nervous as Merlin never is.

"Can I sit down please?"

"Of course Merlin." Arthur pulled out the chair next to him and watched as Merlin slowly walked over and sat down. "Something's wrong."

"It is."

"Merlin?"

Merlin looked Arthur. "You know Arthur that I would be happy to be your servant until the day I die. I never wish to leave your side in servitude but I am afraid I must."

"You no longer want to be my servant?"

"I do Arthur. I just can't."

"Why?"

"My mother. She has fallen ill. My father cannot work and look after her as well and she needs a lot of care. Gaius has made me plenty of potions to take home and give her."

"Bring your parents to live here Merlin."

"I can't Arthur. Until I get there I don't know how bad she is. She may be too weak to move."

"So you are not leaving because you want to, but because you feel you have to."

"Yes."

Arthur sighed and looked at Merlin closely. "I don't like this Merlin but I understand as I would do the same if it was my mother. I am going to miss you my friend."

"I will be back Arthur. This isn't permanent."

"It's not?"

"No. As soon as my mother is well enough I will be back. It will be just a matter of time. I hope we can keep in touch."

"I expect at least two letters a week Merlin."

Merlin laughed. "I expect the same. Arthur."

"When do you leave Merlin?"

"Tomorrow at dawn. It is a three day walk to Ealdor I need to get a head start."

"You are not walking. As a parting gift I want you to take Thunder."

"Arthur I can't, she is one of your best horses."

"I know she is. Which is why I want you to have her. Are you all packed?"

"I am."

Arthur nodded and stood up, pulling Merlin into a brief hug.


"I don't like this Merlin."

"Neither do I Gwaine. You know I wouldn't leave if I had to."

"I know that Merlin but-"

"But what?"

Gwaine sighed and held Merlin's arm, pulling him away from his horse that Arthur was checking to see if Merlin had everything. "You are not going home to look after your mum."

"Of course I am."

"Merlin I know you. Yes Arthur does but he doesn't see the Merlin I sometimes see. There is a reason that has forced you to leave. Am I right?"

Merlin dropped his head. "You are."

"Is this something Arthur cannot know?" Percival asked, coming to stand by his husband.

"It is. Please don't tell him that the reason I am going is not because of my mum. Please."

"Your secret is safe with us Merlin." Gwaine held his arm out and Merlin took it, allowing the knight to draw him into a hug. "I am going to miss you Merlin."

"And I you Gwaine. You too Percival."

"This place won't be the same without you friend."

Merlin just smiled and walked back over to his horse and looked at Arthur as he finished checking it. "You are all set Merlin."

"Thank you."

Arthur took a deep breath and stared at Merlin. "I don't want you to go."

"I don't want to go."

"Then stay."

"You know I can't Arthur."

Stepping forward, Arthur's arms were at his side and Merlin moved in closer for a hug, then Arthur's hand abruptly swung up and Merlin swallowed heavily. He shook Arthur's hand as the Prince said "Don't be away forever."

"I won't Arthur. You won't even notice I've gone."

"I will. Still..."

"Arthur I have to be going now."

Arthur tightened his grip on Merlin's hand briefly before letting go. Merlin hugged Gaius and got on his horse and got settled before looking down at Arthur who hadn't moved. "I will see you again Pendragon."

"I will make sure of it." Arthur reached out and placed his hand on Merlin's knee, squeezing it slightly before tapping Thunder who then began her slow trot. As the horse started to move, Merlin looked back and smiled at Arthur, feeling his tears escape, he turned back to face the front and urged Thunder to speed up and hurry out of Camelot, hoping no one who stopped and watched Merlin leave hear him sobbing.

"Percival?"

"Yes love?"

"I give it one month and then I am riding out to Ealdor to see just what it is that Merlin is hiding."

Percival looked to where they last saw Merlin riding away and then at his husband, putting his arm around him and holding him close.


After a few hours ride Merlin decided to have something to eat and give Thunder a rest. He started to go through the bag that contained his food for the journey when his hand came across something cold and hard.

Frowning, Merlin closed his fingers around the item and pulled it out of the bag. Smiling when he saw a small dagger that had the Pendragon symbol on it. He unsheathed the blade and picked up the small note that fell to the ground. "Magic can't protect you from everything. Take care of yourself...idiot. A."

Merlin hummed and held the note and blade to his chest. "So that was what he was rummaging around at when I was saying goodbye to Gwaine and Percival." Merlin said to Thunder who just grumbled and continued to eat the grass.

With Merlin having Thunder he made it to Ealdor within two days. Merlin pulled his horse to a stop and turned a corner and saw his mother walking out of her house, a small basket of clothes under her arm.

"Ma."

Hunith looked up at the voice she hadn't heard in a long time. Seeing her son looking tired but with a smile on his face, Hunith laughed a little as she dropped her basket, not caring that the clothes got dirty again on the ground. "Merlin! Balinor our son is home." she called into the house before running over to Merlin who opened his arms and welcomed the warm and caring hug his Ma gave him.

"Merlin son." Merlin pulled out of his Ma's arms and smiled when he was pulled into another hug. "You home for good son?"

"For about a year then it is back to Camelot."

"Why only a year?" Balinor asked, but Hunith looked at her son closely. "Something's wrong."

"I'm pregnant Ma."

"Pregnant? How?"

"Our son is a very powerful warlock it is possible dear."

"And also helpful if you mentioned it during the sex talk all those years ago."

"I didn't think you would grow to be that powerful of a warlock son."

"It's alright Da."

"Who is the other father son?"

"Just someone I met at Morgana and Leon's wedding. I can't be Arthur's servant and protect him whilst pregnant."

"Does Arthur know you are pregnant?"

"No Ma. I could have told him and he would have relieved me of being a servant and then wanted me to stay so he can keep an eye on me but if I am not his servant I can't stand by and watch him ride out to god only knows where with all kinds of dangers out there. I thought if I leave and come home until I have the baby it is better and I won't be risking mine or my baby's life."

"You did the right thing. Welcome home son." Hunith said as she pulled Merlin into another hug. Merlin looked over his Ma's shoulder and saw Balinor stood there with an eyebrow raised, looking as though he didn't believe every word that just came from his mouth.


Well? What do you think?

Chapter three up tomorrow :D

Review? x