Disclaimer – This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.


Chapter 2 – Ponderings

Harry was making his way through the journal he had maintained since a year ago. Due to the rise of Voldemort, he was cut off for a large part of the summer holidays from the wizarding world. His only company was his faithful companion Hedwig. Hence he had decided to maintain the journal. At first he wanted to maintain a dairy. But after the disastrous encounter with Tom Riddle's diary, he decided a journal would be more than enough. Whenever he would feel alone, he would note down his thoughts and feelings in the journal. He read about how he would wander around Little Whinging scavenging newspapers in the bins looking for news, his daily squabbles with the Dursleys, how his friends were held from telling him everything in their letters and how he felt alone and uncared.

He reached the entry when the dementors had attacked him and Dudley. He shivered at the memory. That Um-bitch woman had admitted sending those foul things after him last summer to get him expelled. He had even received his expulsion letter for the use of underage magic and they were going to destroy his wand. He remembered getting Arthur Weasley's owl telling him that Dumbledore was moving strings at the ministry. He remembered the relief he felt when he received the second letter from the ministry telling him that he was suspended instead of expelled. He remembered the howler his aunt had received but couldn't understand its meaning.

He remembered how the advanced guard had come to take him to No. 12 Grimmauld Place. Remus, Tonks, Moody, Shacklebolt, Elphias Doge, Dedalus Diggle, Emmeline Vance, Sturgis Podmore and Hestia Jones had all volunteered to come and get him. At first he was very stiff and didn't speak much to anyone. But as time wore on he became good friends with everyone. He remembered how Tonks had helped him pack his trunk. She was by no means ugly but he was certain that she hid her real appearance. He was attracted to her. Who wouldn't?,he thought. He felt heat rise to his cheeks at this thought.

Do I really like her that way?, he thought. He had to admit to himself that he was attracted to her.

But so were you attracted to Cho, a voice said inside his head.

But Cho was different. She was with me because I reminded her of Cedric, he countered. Tonks has never treated me differently just because I have this bloody scar. She has always been a good friend to me.

This was indeed the truth. She wasn't like the other girls goggling at his scar. She acted around him like all those who knew who he really was. He realised that this was what he had always wanted in his life, that everyone treats him like a normal person and not like a celebrity.

And now you want her to be more than your friend?, the voice said again.

Harry again felt his cheeks reddening at the thought.

Yes, but I don't want to lose her friendship. If she will like to be more than friends with me, I would be more than happy.

Like she would even consider anyone like you, the voice said sarcastically.

Harry's mood changed at this thought. He remembered how sad he was when Dumbledore said that Tonks had to spend some time in St. Mungo's hospital. He was afterwards informed that she was recovered fully and no lasting damage had been done. He also remembered how happy he felt at the train platform when he saw everyone but most of the happiness had come due to seeing her in good condition.

He checked the clock to see that it was time for lunch and decided to head down. After a light meal during which he was left to his own measures by his aunt, he headed back to his room. He was quite pleased that the Dursleys were most of the time ignoring him, but another thought quickly crossed his mind. This was going to be a long summer.

He once again sat on his bed pondering over the entries in his journal. His fifth year was by far the worst year of his life. Between the torture by Umbridge upto the death of Sirius, not many things had gone his way. The DA and his friends support were the only things that had kept him going.

His mind wandered back to the hearing at the ministry. He remembered how he was treated by that idiot Fudge. Amelia Bones had atleast been impartial and so he was cleared of all charges. His thoughts carried on like this for the rest of the afternoon while he was reviewing his journal. He wondered briefly how his thoughts would wander off to other realms as Tonks came in the picture.

I am definitely attracted to her, he thought. And this is going to kill me.

He wondered how on earth he was going to behave in front of her. He could bloody well face old Snakeface and his Death Eaters but he would be damned if he could talk with girls properly or understand them. He knew one day he would have to talk about his feelings to someone and he fervently hoped that that someone was Tonks.

One day the Gryffindor in me will wake up and I will talk to her about my feelings, he promised to himself.

The other thing he thought was the state in which the wizarding world would be right now. He had heard that after Fudge had made an announcement stating the official return of Lord Voldemort, the community was in an uproar. People were blaming Fudge for discrediting the boy-who-lived and Dumbledore. He status had gone from a deluded, attention-seeking person who thinks he is a tragic hero to the saviour of the world all over again. He did not care about Fudge any more than he cared about the Dursleys. But he understood that since Fudge was the Minister of Magic, his removal may very well lead to the downfall of the system. And knowing Voldemort, he wouldn't think twice about attacking blindly or placing one of his Death Eaters to replace Fudge.

He decided that he needed to talk to Dumbledore about this matter. The Headmaster had given his word that he would not keep things from Harry. Maybe his status and Dumbledore's intervention would help stabilize the condition. He had often wondered if his status would do something useful for once. Now he had the chance to see if it would make a difference.

Thoughts of Voldemort had brought him back to the most dreadful part of the previous year. Dumbledore had told him the prophesy, the prophesy that marked his fate. The words of the prophesy were ringing bells inside his head.

'The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches… born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month diesand the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows notand either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survivesthe one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies…'

A rational part of his mind told him that this was indeed to be expected. Voldemort had come after him so many times until now that he had surely wondered why indeed the Dark Lord was being a stubborn git. Surely he wasn't that stupid, he thought to himself. But you can't be too certain about it. He chuckled to himself at this thought.

The full meaning of the prophesy was not clear to him, but the essence was. He was born to defeat the most evil Dark Lord on the earth. If this was not enough then there was no one else who could do so except him which meant that he couldn't die without killing him or else the rest of the world would suffer. He wondered briefly how he had managed to survive all these years. He surely had a lot of help without which he doubted he could have lived this long.

He wondered whether he could twist Fudge's arm with Dumbledore's help to get advantage over the situation. He could get a waiver over the Law of Restriction of Underage Magic. If he could practice magic then atleast he would be prepared the next time the psychotic idiot and his gang attacked him.

Great Potter, he thought, now you are making fun of the evilest person on this planet.


Cornelius Fudge, the Minister of Magic, was sitting in his office thinking about the happenings of the past few days. His greed to save his own arse and discredit Dumbledore and Harry had backfired tremendously. Now he wondered whether the people would stop anything less than feeding him to the dementors.

He realised that he had made unforgivable errors in his judgement so far and was repenting it already. Seeing You-Know-Who with his own eyes had scared the living daylights out of him. The Dark Lord had come barging directly in the Ministry building and no one had the knowledge about this. If it weren't for Dumbledore and his Order and Harry and his friends then most probably there wouldn't have been a Ministry building left to be seen.

After Dumbledore had explained to him the events occuring in the Ministry he was filled with horror that the security had been compromised so easily. He also wondered if he could repair the damage he had caused during the previous year.

Finally he decided that he would have to talk to Dumbledore about the situation. He made a resolve to never repeat his foolish mistakes or fall for greed. Even if he had to step down as the Minister, he would gladly do so if it would be the best for the wizarding society.


Remus was sitting at the Headquarters of the Order of the Phoenix worrying about Harry. He remembered the elation he felt when he had seen Sirius a couple of years ago. When Sirius was arrested for betraying the Potter's and killing Peter and a street full of twelve muggles, the sadness he had felt for the loss of his best friends was tremendous. He never had believed that Sirius would ever betray them but the circumstantial evidence was enough to send him to Azkaban. Thus when he had seen Sirius alive and well he had felt the friendship reestablish between them.

He realised that his sorrow was nothing in comparison to what Harry must be feeling now. He still remembered how happy Harry had been when Sirius had asked him in his third year if Harry would like to live with him. But the happiness had been short lived. Moony had struck a deadly blow and Peter had escaped to join and resurrect Voldemort. Remus still hadn't forgiven himself for that night and still felt that he was the cause of Harry's sadness.

He realised that he should be there for Harry now when nothing was left. He still had to repay the love given by his friends to an outcast such as himself. He would well be damned if he would leave Harry now. He knew how Harry must have been feeling. The guilt would surely be overwhelming.

He finally decided that he would pay Harry a visit in a couple of days.


Molly Weasley was sitting in the parlour of the Borrow deep in thought. She didn't even realise when Arthur had entered the room and closed the door behind him. When he placed a hand on her shoulder, she jumped up in shock.

"Oh, Arthur its you. How was you day dear?", she asked when she realised who he was.

"My day was fine Molly dear, but are you alright. You seem to be a little shaken."

"I'm fine Arthur. Its just that… ", she trailed off looking elsewhere.

"Are you worrying about Harry?", he asked softly.

She nodded.

"I hope he will be alright."

"Oh Arthur, why does everything happen to him? Why can't he ever lead a normal life?"

"I don't know Molly. I could never understand how someone who has gone through so much in his short life and yet be so caring and selfless."

"That he is Arthur. I only hope Albus removes him from that horrid relatives of his as early as possible. I cannot imagine how he will deal with this loss while staying there."

"Me too Molly, me too."


Tonks' day till now had not been a pleasant one. Thrice she had been caught daydreaming by Shacklebolt and was severly reprimanded. When asked what was so important that she was thinking about, she was unable to answer. Well ofcourse. How was I going to tell him that I was dreaming about Harry? She decided that her job was suffering and this was all due to Harry. I am going mad thinking about him.

One day you are going to be a heart-breaker, Harry Potter, she sighed.


After going through his journal, Harry realised that he would have to think about two things immediately. One was his talk with Professor Dumbledore and the other was how he was going to express his feelings for Tonks. He was sure that the first one would be a piece of cake. The second on the other hand was anything but easy. In fact he wondered whether facing old Tom would be an easy task. At the most he would kill me. But with Tonks he was not certain of his fate. He remembered Dumbledore's words. There are things much worse than death. He decided to cross the bridge when it came to that. For now he needed to think about his talk with Dumbledore.

He decided to write to Dumbledore requesting to meet him. He removed a piece of parchment, quill and an ink-bottle and spread them on his desk. After thinking for a while on how to phrase the letter, he realised that he could not give any details. So he scribbled a simple note.

Professor Dumbledore,

Everything is okay. The Dursleys are behaving. Please come to visit me when you have time. I have a certain matter to discuss with you.

Harry Potter.

Rolling the parchment, he sealed it with candle wax and went over to Hedwig's cage. She seemed to wait in anticipation to carry the letter.

"Feel up to little journey girl?", he asked her.

She hooted her approval and he chuckled at her enthusiasm. She held out her leg so that he could tie the letter to it. He carried her to the window and set her into the sky. He watched her small form disappear out of sight and retreated to his bed. He continued to skim through the journal waiting for sleep to gain control.


Albus Dumbledore was sitting in his office going over some parchments when Hedwig soared through the window and landed on the desk. She immediately stuck out her and hooted at him to remove her burden. Albus removed the letter and watched as she again flew out of the window. He read the letter quickly and wondered what Harry wanted to discuss with him.

Atleast he is willing to talk to me, he thought.

He jotted a quick note saying that he will be there tomorrow afternoon at 2 pm and asked Fawkes to deliver it.


Harry was brought out of his reverie by a burst of flames that heralded the arrival of Fawkes. He was on his feet in an instance, wand in hand and a curse on the tip of his toungue. His heartbeat calmed only when he heard the soft trilling of the phoenix. He chuckled at his paranoia.

Moody must be rubbing on me, he thought.

He read the note and was pleased to see that the headmaster was coming to visit him. Tomorrow he would see if his fame would be of any use.


A/N: Next chapter – Meetings with Remus and Dumbledore. Readers please review.