DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NARUTO!
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Itachi hummed lightly as he sat at the kitchen table, munching on a plate a dango. The sweet balls left a lingering taste in his mouth as he sucked on them, loving the taste. The weasel set down the empty stick, picking up another one and looked at it for a second. There were only two balls on this one, a blue and a green one. Itachi sighed and set it down, resting his head on his hand. Which one is the right choice? Both of them were perfect int heir own way.
Kisame was tall and muscular. He could kill a ninja in so many different ways that it was rediculous. He was a member of the seven swordsmen of the mist, had rippling muscles, a strong, musky scent, sexy as hell and yet didn't have that overly muscular look to him. He also had great abs. And we're talking washboard abs, the type that makes you want to just rub your hands all over it repeatedly. Not to mention he had that wild side to him. The side that only came out when he lost control.
But Zetsu...He was different. Zetsu was moderate height with messy green hair that, even when he just rolled out of bed, was perfect. He also had rippling muscles, a great body, and a hot ass. That was the kind of ass that makes an uke like him just want to bite it. The kind of ass that- ok, now he was getting off track. Zetsu was the gentle, muscular type. He was the medic at the Akatsuki base and could travel anywhere in the matter of seconds.
Either way, both makes had great looks, better than most personalities, and kind hearts. That or Itachi just had a fetish for odd colored skin and sharp teeth. The weasel shrugged and bit into the two colored balls, munching happily.
Kisame leaned back on the couch, looking up at the ceiling. He had been having feelings for his small partner for a while, and he was ready to admit them to him. The shark man closed his eyes as courage bubbled inside of him, smiling and jumped up, walking out of the living room only to run into Zetsu. The two men looked at eachother, rubbing the back of their necks sheepishly.
"Hey, sorry man. I didn't mean to-"
"Nah, its ok Kisame. I didn't see you-"
"Its my fault really. Sorry Zetsu."
"Sorry."
The two men chuckled and both started walking toward the kitchen, then stopped and looked at eachother curiously.
"So...Where are you going Zetsu?" Kisame said, looking down at the slightly smaller male.
"We're going to the kitchen..." Zetsu smiled. "We finally built up the courage to ask Itachi-san out." He went to take another step when Kisame grabbed his shoulder slightly.
"Really?...So did I..."
The plant man looked up at Kisame, all joking and kindness aside.
"So..."
"So..."
"..."
"...He likes us better..."
Kisame scoffed. "Ya right. Everyone knows he likes strong men." And with that he smirked and flexed his muscles slightly.
Zetsu rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest. "He likes strong 'men'. Not wimpy ass chicks who carry around a giant tampon on their back." Su said, glaring.
Kisame growled at them. "Men. Not ficuses."
"WE AREN'T A FUCKING FICUS!"
"YOU'RE RIGHT: YOU'RE A DAISY!"
"ARGGGGG! YOU'RE A FUCKING GUPPY!"
"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU CALL ME?"
"YOU HEARD US! GUPPY-CHAN! GUPPY-CHAN!"
"FICUS-BAKAS! FICUS-BAKAS!"
The two men glared at eachother, inches from eachother's faces.
"Fine." Kisame huffed, pulling away. "We'll just have ourselves a little competition then. Fair and square. Whoever Itachi falls in love with first gets him."
The plant man scoffed and glared at him. "Fine. But if you want any luck with him, you might want to wash your teeth guppy-chan. They reek of fish."
Kisame growled and shook their hand, glaring at them. "Better than stinking of mud and human flesh." And with that he dropped his hand and stomped away, bringing his hand up and blew in it, sniffing.
Zetsu huffed and walked toward their own room, bringing their hand up and blew into it, smelling it.
"Hn. Maybe he was right..."
AU: And the contest begins! Who will prevail? The sexy shark or the handsome plantman?
