Meet the Parents
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Jaune goes into Vale to go shopping. Yang goes along out of boredom- and gets a bit more up close and personal with his parents than she intended.
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Meet the Father
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And so she did. A short while longer, shopping complete, she even helped him carry his packages- a nice chance to show off the merits of her bumblebee. The bike was currently serving as an impromptu package delivery service… to another package delivery service.
"It's simple," Yang had told Jaune. "You want to make up for running away? Send them today. Even if you don't send a letter, at least they'll know you're alive and well."
He'd agreed that it was good advice, and she probably wouldn't have let him back out if he'd tried. But he hadn't… at least not until he turned white as they pulled up towards a delivery service Yang had used in the past. Parking beside a stockier black bike, she gave Jaune a curious look.
"You're not going to throw up on me now, are you Vomit Boy?" she asked, even though he hadn't even turned green during their (slow, precarious) trip here with the gifts.
"Uh, no," Jaune denied, but he wasn't looking at her. He was staring at the black bike. "Uh, Yang? You don't happen to know any other delivery services around here, do you?" he asked.
"None that come this cheap and reliable," she said. "And none near here. What's up?"
Jaune didn't answer immediately. "Could I pretty please beg a favor?" he asked shakily.
"You already are," Yang pointed out, but didn't say no.
"Could you please go in there and send these gifts without me?" Jaune asked, taking out a slip of paper with the intended shipping address. "Pretty please? I'll, uh, watch my team's gifts out here. Not in there," he said, still staring at the bike.
It was a pretty craven thing to ask, but Jaune was still staring at the bike in obvious horror.
"What, you owe 'em money?" Yang asked, eyebrow raised.
"Something like that," Jaune said. "Please Yang? I'll get you something nice- another something nice," he offered.
Greed won over contempt, and Yang snagged the shipping address. "And I thought Blake was the scaredy cat about things she didn't want to talk about," she remarked, but Jaune was too busy thanking her. "I'll be back," she said.
"Er, I'll be over there," Jaune said, pointing further down the road and out of sight.
Shaking her head, Yang took the packages for Jaune's family and walked into the delivery service. Though the packages towered higher than her head, she managed to open the door by backing into it. The door opened with the ring of a bell, and she was inside.
And promptly dropped the packages when she stumbled into someone.
"Crap!" Yang swore as her tower tumbled to the ground. She caught what she could, but-
"Oh, sorry," came the masculine apology, and blond hair that wasn't hers came into her line of sight and picked packages off the ground.
He- it was most definitely a man- had spikey blond hair on top of a lean build. His face had a sort of toughness that came from experience- older than Yang usually liked- but he had a wonderful set of blue eyes.
'Me likey,' Yang appreciated, even as he bent over to pick one up. 'Me likely a lot.'
"Sorry about your package," the man politely apologized, handing back one in particular that had been torn. It was the one with the flower- though it looked like the flower might have been spared if the box was just crumpled.
"Nah, my bad," Yang would have waved off, were it not for what was in her hands. "Should have looked where I was going, except-" she shrugged. Can't ask the impossible with so many boxes.
"You a customer?" he asked, picking up another bag as Yang dropped her baggage on the counter.
"You the owner?" Yang asked in return.
"Just the deliveryman," he said. "You caught me leaving."
"Good!" Yang said, pleased. "I was hoping I wouldn't have to lug this back to Beacon. Maybe you can take this stuff with you," she hoped. "You going outside the wall?" she asked, referring to the Kingdom's formidable defenses even as she offered Jaune's address slip.
"No," the delivery man said, though he took the slip anyway. "I'm looking around Vale for-" his denial paused when he saw the address. "Edge?" he said, reading it carefully. "Not many people live out there," he said, looking at her.
Yang shrugged- though she made sure to do so in a way that accentuated her figure. "I've got a friend," she claimed.
"And your… friend," the blond deliveryman said. "Is he expecting to be there to receive all this?"
"I never said it was a he," Yang said charmingly- and perfectly honest, which helped with the lie.
Blondie gave her another look- but visibly decided not to follow through. "I won't be going back there today, but I can take these the next time I go back," he promised.
"Great to hear!" Yang chirped, giving no sign or any hint of any sort of relief. "How much will it be?" she asked.
"I'll give you a free package for the one of yours I damaged," he said. "Let me just see-" he trailed off, pulling the contents of the damaged package. The single white flower.
His hands started shaking.
"Where did you get this?" he asked, voice deceptively calm.
"A pretty flower girl in the park," Yang answered honestly.
"That- I mean, who gave this to you?" the delivery man asked.
"Does it matter?" Yang asked. "I can give you my name and number for a return address if you want," she offered, winking.
"No thanks," the deliveryman said. "I'd rather have your friend's."
"No, you wouldn't," Yang insisted, moving closer into the man's personal space. "Trust me- just hideous in a dress. Besides," Yang said, putting a finger to his chest and circling it. "I'd rather not talk about anyone else right now. Why don't we talk about us?" she suggested, leaning closer.
He got closer in return- and shoved her back. Yang found herself checked into the wall behind her with her arm trapped above her head.
"Miss," the blond man warned, "I think you know someone I'm looking for. Please tell me where to find him."
"Ooh, feisty," she said playfully, giving no hint of fear. Despite the position- or perhaps because of it- she couldn't help but appreciate the strong, toned muscles on her captor. "But I normally don't like pushy guys."
"Then I'll be happy to stop," he returned, "as soon as you tell me where he is." His hand tightened- hard enough that her aura automatically rose to protect her. That grip could have hurt.
"Do you really have to be so rough?" Yang flirted once more, even as she prepared a fist with her free hand. "I'm sure we could… work things out between us. Wouldn't you rather be friends?" she asked, arcing her chest seductively.
The blond man looked down… and laughed in her face. "First, not interested," he said. "Happily taken. And second… I've seen better. Married better," he claimed. "I've cross-dressed better. So why don't you give up and tell me-"
Yang answered him with a head-butt. He let go as he staggered back, clutching his nose- a follow up punch sent him tumbling through the boxes on the counter.
"And that's for claiming you could do better!" Yang shouted, before racing out the door.
/
She'd just started Bumblebee before he burst out of the store, and pulled away before he could grab for her. She tcched as she saw him run for the other black bike, wishing she'd had time to blast the tires.
She raced down the road towards where Jaune was, only to see him emerge from his hiding spot- no doubt hearing the screeching tires. She tcched again- if he'd he'd stayed hidden, she could have tried to draw off cutey-mcjerk. But then, that wouldn't have been like Jaune- weakling or not, he didn't stay out of trouble if his friends were in it. Instead, she saw Jaune's eyes widen as he saw who was behind her- and presumably was seen in return.
Yang leaned bumblebee closer towards Jaune, and nearly clotheslined the frightened boy as she drove by. An awkward moment of handling later, and he was on Bumblebee behind her.
"Hold on!" she shouted behind her, reving the engine more.
"Where?" Jaune yelped.
("I've seen better. Married better.")
Ooh, that prick- she'd show him-
"Anywhere!" Yang answered. "Just don't vomit!"
She gave another rev of the engine, and heard another behind them. A quick glance told her that the black bike was behind her. The man was shouting.
"He sounds mad!" Yang said, even if she couldn't understand the words.
"What did you do?" Jaune asked.
"What did I do?" Yang asked. "What makes you think I-?" she protested.
Jaune gave her a look so hard she could feel it even before she turned and saw it.
"I might have punched him in the face," Yang admitted.
Jaune went pale, and not from the tight turn Yang was leaning into.
"You punched my Dad?" he asked.
Yang almost spun out then and there.
"Your dad?!" she exclaimed, paling herself. "Then that means I- with Jaune's- ew ew ew!" she spat, regretting that she'd ever thought he was hot.
"You what?" Jaune asked. "What did you do?" he demanded. "What did you do?!"
"Never mind that!" Yang shouted back, dodging and weaving between traffic. "What did you do? I thought you owed him money!"
"I do! I stole my allowance for the year when I left!" Jaune admitted.
"That's-" Yang began, but shook her head. "Never mind," she decided.
"Jaune!" there was the faint shout behind them.
"Why are we running away anyway?" Yang asked. "Didn't you want to make up?"
"Yeah! But not be dragged back home!" Jaune exclaimed. "I'll be grounded for life!"
Yang considered what her father would do, and conceded the point. "How much longer do you think until he gives up chasing?" Yang asked.
"He doesn't give up easily," Jaune said as he chanced a look back- no doubt avoiding any meeting of the eyes- and then shoved Yang down and to the right. "Watch out!" he shouted before she could protest.
That shove- or at least the movement to rebalance- was what saved them as a massive blade impacted where bumblebee's rear tire would have been. Sparks flew on the edge of a blade that certainly would have cut through the rear tire with ease.
"How'd he get so close?" Yang wondered looking back. "That shouldn't be- oh, that is so fucking cheating!" she swore.
Their pursuer was still behind them, but the massive two-handed sword he held with just one was easily another motorcycle length in and of itself. "How is he holding it like that?" Yang demanded.
"He used to be a soldier before he was a hunter!" Jaune answered. "Now hurry up! He's catching up again!"
"How come he gets a weapon and we don't?" Yang complained, even as she leaned forward. It was the start of a game of tag- in which angry father was it, and was tagging with his mighty sword. Dodging traffic helped, but at the same time-
"We got to get out of here!" Jaune said, as worried about civilians as she was.
"Already on it," Yang said, even as she jumped lanes into an exit ramp downward, towards a lower lane. She was getting sick and tired of the mismatch. Jaune's father had given up trying to shout at them, and seemed to be settling for trying to hit them. At least he was using the flat of his blade.
"Jaune! Can you call our weapon lockers?" Yang asked as an idea came to her. There was a construction site way down aways…
"On it!" Jaune agreed, pulling out his scroll.
His attempts were thwarted, however, when their pursuer slammed down beside them, having fallen from above. Did he skip the ramp and jump…?
His fall was accompanied by the fall of his blade- still sharp end up and away from them, but in-between them now that Jaune had leaned back to use his scroll. Jaune gave a yelp, and a frantic grab at Yang's waist as the flat of the sword broke his previous grip.
Jaune's father began to slow- and as he did, the sword began to act as a laver. Either Yang slowed down with him, or Jaune would be pried off- either falling to the pavement, or held by the blade like butter balanced on a knife.
"Why don't you two slow down now?" Jaune's father coolly suggested from beside them.
Yang cursed, but did as he said- wanting to fight, but not seeing how. "Hold on, Jaune," she muttered, slowing. Jaune's father kept the blade even, and gradually slowed with her.
Jaune sighed, and despite the blade leaned forward against her back, forehead touching on her head. "Sorry," he apologized. "For getting you involved in my mess," he said, almost a whisper.
"Not your fault," Yang said. "I got myself involved."
"Still not reason you should get in trouble with me," Jaune denied, before hesitating. "Tell everyone at school I'm sorry if this doesn't work?" he asked.
"Jaune?" Yang asked, not liking the tone.
Jaune let go of her, and leaned back off the bike.
"Jaune!" That wasn't just her- that was Jaune's father as well, fear (or horror?) evident as Jaune fell. They'd slowed down, true, but they were still going at a pretty significant pace- a pace that would seriously hurt a normal person. Jaune bounced, and tumbled, and there was the sound of a tearing of cloth as he slid and came to an ominous stop.
Yang tore into skidding stop. Jaune's father did one better- he actually jumped from his motorcycle, sending it tumbling end over end. Yang had to duck as it bounced over her- and over the edge of the road. In mid-air, Jaune's father took that same massive sword from earlier- one he'd jumped with ease holding- and used it as a jumping point. The physics in Remnant followed- Jaune's father sped towards Jaune, while the blade tumbled far away.
Jaune's father landed beside him, sliding to Jaune and flipping him over. Wide blue eyes expected to see the worst- but didn't. Torn jeans, black asphalt streaks, but no blood. And barely a bruise, which was already healing.
"You have aura," Jaune's father realized. Jaune hadn't skidded- he'd practically skipped on an aura cushion.
Jaune's own blue eyes snapped open. "Sorry, Dad," he apologized, before drawing his knees in and shoving his father away with a two-legged kick.
His father was still stumbling backwards even as Jaune jumped to his feet and raced towards Yang. Bumblebee was already roaring, and intercepted him. This time the impact really was a clothesline- a deliberately rough impact- but the same effect as Jaune was dragged aboard… though this time dragged him infront of her, practically on her lap.
"I can't believe that worked," Jaune admitted as they raced past his father, who was back on his feet but short a bike.
"I can't believe that you were that stupid," Yang countered, angry… before laughing as adrenaline of a different sort settled in her. "But yeah, I can't believe that worked. Or that you had it in you," Yang admitted, impressed.
Jaune shrugged, looking up at her from his position of being in her lap perpendicular to the bike. It was more awkward than embarassing. "Eh- either he lost his bike, or he wouldn't chase you. Either way, I win."
Yang took a hand off the controls to bop him, and not gently. He yelped. "Next time you give me a scare, wear a helmet," she chided. "You'll set a bad example for Ruby."
"Yeah, probably," he laughed, adrenaline fading.
"Come on. Let's get you up before you headbutt a car or something," Yang said.
Jaune laughed at her chiding, and they maneuvered him upright and sitting on bumblebee. This time he sat infront of Yang, with her leaning into his back, rather than behind her. Partly because of how he'd been dragged aboard… and perhaps partly so she could better secure him as she grabbed the handles around him.
Jaune didn't ask, just leaned forward and rested his hands on the controls as well, and let a silence fall as they raced away, and towards the airshuttle park to get back to Beacon.
"Well, at least they know you're alive," Yang eventually said, looking at the bright side.
"Yeah," Jaune said. "And at least it wasn't my mom."
"She have an even bigger sword?" Yang asked, bemused.
"She would have thrown cars at us," Jaune said.
Yang laughed, but Jaune wasn't joking.
"You're not joking," Yang realized.
Jaune sighed. "Well, guess I'm not going into Vale again any time soon," he said. "She'll be hunting now that they know I'm somewhere around here."
Something tugged at the corner of Yang's mind, but she couldn't think of what. She tried to remember.
("I've seen better. Married better.")
She scowled at the memory, though Jaune couldn't see it… but then a thought occurred to her. Revenge by proxy, perhaps?
"Well, just sit back and enjoy it while you can, Jaune" Yang suggested, leaning forward a bit harder as she took a firmer grip of the handles on the far side of her passenger.
"It'll be the best you'll ever have."
"Motorcycle ride?"
"Sure. Let's go with that."
/
Well, well behind them, Jaune's father picked himself up and dusted himself off even as he caught one last glimpse of them riding away. A frown was on his face… but a weight was off his chest all the same.
Walking over towards his fallen bike, he ignored the skid-marks (noting now that there hadn't been a hint of blood) and picked up his fallen buster sword, before going over to the lip of the road his bike had fallen over. Jumping down a level, he landed beside it and righted the sturdy Fenris- which was scratched and scarred, but still as capable as always.
"Don't say I didn't try to make this easy on you, Jaune," he muttered as he punched buttons and pulled out a scroll. "If you thought I was bad, wait till your mother hears about this," he muttered, as he waited for the other end to pick up.
"Hey Dear," the former SOLDIER greeted with a ghost of a smile at the sound of the pickup. "Guess who I ran across on my deliveries?"
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Author Note:
Yup. It's a crossover.
'Meet the Parents' is the lead-in to a future project of sorts- 'Meet the Family'- which is really just a series of one-shot crossovers of 'Jaune is related to various blond haired, blue eyed heroes.' No plot- just one shots of relevant characters. But Meet the Parents is special- and anyone who watches ScrewAttack's Death Battle series on youtube can probably guess why.
Otherwise- this is a case of me trying to write an action sequence, something I've been trying to get more practice in. Dialogue with Mom in the next part.
