Anonymous Girl Gamer: This is funny. Can't wait for more!
Thanks! I can't wait to write more!
At last, Mario reached the top of the castle in the Valley of Bowser. He had come so far, and he wasn't going to back down now. He watched as Bowser descended in his Clown Copter.
It's showtime.
As his adversary threw down a pair of Mechakoopas, Mario knew these were his tickets to success in this fight. Using all his might, he hurled them up into the face of Bowser, who promptly flew high above him. He dodged fireballs which rained down around him.
"Oh boy," exclaimed Mario, "this is a good one. Tell me again why Bowser is green, Luigi?"
"Uh... graphical limitations?"
"Or maybe he's just becoming more eco-friendly. Just look at the Clown Copter's propeller. All-natural wind power there."
"Mario?" Luigi's face was puzzled. "I lost you at 'eco-friendly.'"
"He's green."
"Gotcha. Hey, isn't green Bowser more so King Koopa's shtick?"
"You'd think. In my opinion, the Super Mario Maker version of him looks way better. Next we have the Clown Copter itself. Just look at those darling eyes and cute mouth. Tell me it isn't sentient."
"Yeah, if it was, players would think it was the final boss of Super Mario World."
"Speaking of sentient, what do you make of those fireballs?"
"The ones with eyes and mouths? Those are probly Fryguy's teenage sons without their shades. Plus they haven't had their morning coffee yet."
"And they just die after a few seconds of being on screen. Poor fireballs."
"There's more, isn't there?"
"Oh yes," Mario replied as he resumed the video. "Lots more."
As the Clown Copter returned to its position above Mario, he could see Princess Peach inside. "Help!" she cried as she tossed a Mushroom down to her hero. She retreated back into the vehicle as Bowser re-emerged.
"Now just a minute!" Luigi cried. "How can both Peach and Bowser fit into the same Clown Copter?"
"It's a Clown Copter, Luigi. Nevertheless, I've ridden them before, and you can't possibly fit anything else in there."
"The Koopalings could barely fit in one," remembered Luigi. "I gotta admit, I feel bad for the princess, having to be squeezed in there with Bowser."
"And several dozen Mechakoopas which happen to be the only way to beat him in this fight," added Mario. "Plus, Bowser's actually ducking down in order to reach the Mechakoopas. I thought that the rim of the Clown Copter was stuck around his waist or something."
"And also think of the princess," said Luigi. "She's crammed in there with no room, two gigantic mushrooms, and who knows how many Mechakoopas."
"I have a feeling that's not all," said Mario, pressing the play button once more.
As the battle progressed, Bowser turned the Clown Copter upside-down to release a Big Steely onto the battlefield. It rolled toward Mario, who jumped over it.
"...I have no words," Mario finally said. "He turned the whole thing upside-down to dump a cannonball out. And yet the thing still manages to fly!"
"And there's just barely enough room for the Clown Copter's passengers," Luigi pointed out.
"I'm amazed that Peach doesn't fall out of there," said Mario, who was still trying to wrap this concept around his mind.
"Yeah. Those Big Steelies must weigh a ton."
"They do. Have you not seen the ones at Bob-omb Battlefield?"
"Nope. I never appeared in that game."
"But you did in the sequel. To think that the princess could be crushed by Bowser's legs, Mechakoopas, and the wall of the Clown Copter. That's scary."
Two hits later, Mario dodged the falling fireballs again, and Peach tossed him another Mushroom. Then instead of flying normally, Bowser bounced his vehicle around the arena, attempting to crush the plumber. Mario had also noticed that the Clown Copter's face had changed.
"I knew it was sentient!" shouted Mario. "Clown Copters may not speak, but they can really express themselves!"
"Also, bouncing around in that thing is not only a great way to break the propeller," said Luigi, "but it will probably want your lunch to check out what's happening outside."
"...On that note, we'll wrap this up. Thanks for joining us, and come back next time for more Logical Mario!"
