There was a flurry of intense activity in a trauma room in the back corner of the emergency room. The medical staff responded with controlled urgency as they came and went in a hurry. Alex caught snippets of conversation each time the door was opened. ...typed and cross-matched for him...OR team ready...get him up there now...

She looked at Hannah, whose expression was serious. He was worried. The door swung open again and a doctor approached them, his scrubs bloodied and his face grim. Everything around them faded into the background as he spoke, "You are here with Detective Goren?"

She nodded, apprehensive. "Yes. I have medical proxy for him."

"Let's sit down over here."

He led them to a small room halfway down the hall. A sign to the side of the doorway read 'Consultation' in inch-high letters. Once they were seated, he began, "Kevlar vests save lives, and that is a proven fact, but they are not fool-proof. He took six hits. The four bullets buried in his vest caused some extesive bruising and fractured two ribs. There is another bullet in his hip. The sixth bullet entered here-" He pointed to a spot on his left side, just above where the vest ended. "And it clipped the very edge of his vest, which made it tumble. It did a lot of damage. He's lost a lot of blood, and I can't stop the bleeding. We're giving him blood and fluid, but he's in shock. His blood pressure is very low. He's on his way to surgery now. It's his only chance. The surgeon who will be operating is one of the best. Believe me, whatever chance he has to survive, Victor Kyle will give it to him."

Alex felt her heart drop into her belly. This couldn't be happening. Not again…Please God, not again, she prayed silently.

The doctor said, "You'll find a coffee machine, crackers, peanut butter, and some other snacks in the surgical waiting area. It will likely be a long wait. I can have someone show you there."

Hannah replied, "No, thank you, doctor. This isn't our first rodeo, unfortunately. We know the way."

He and Alex went to the waiting room, prepared for a long wait.


They were the only ones left in the waiting area when the surgeon came out from the surgical area. He looked at them for a long moment before he approached. "You folks are waiting for word about Robert Goren?"

Alex's expression was a mix of anticipation and worry. "Yes, we are."

"You're his family?"

"Yes. I..." She glanced at Hannah and changed her mind about what she was going to say. Instead, she repeated what she told the emergency room doctor. "I'm his partner and I have medical proxy for him."

He was exhausted and his scrub shirt was bloody. He sat in the chair beside her and looked grim. "We did all we could," he said. "There was just too much damage, too much blood loss. He was unstable and in shock when I got him. His organ systems began to shut down and then his heart stopped. We brought him back twice before it, too, gave out. It was too much for him. I am very sorry."

Alex struggled to contain the emotions that threatened to overwhelm her. "I..." She stopped when her voice caught in her throat. Regrouping, she tried again. "Thank you, doctor."

He touched her arm. "Again, I am very sorry."

She just nodded. The doctor looked at Hannah, who nodded at him, too stunned to find his voice. He had been friends with Bobby for nearly two decades. The loss was profound for him.

The doctor left them to their grief. Hannah slipped his arm around Alex's shoulder. She trembled and he tightened his arm around her. "Come on, Alex," he said softly. "I'll take you home. I'll send someone from the squad to pick up the Explorer."

When she started to object, he gently shushed her. "I insist," he said firmly.

She didn't try to refuse again. The ride to her Queens home was a quiet one, each absorbed in their own thoughts. Hannah pulled into her driveway and escorted her to her door. "Is there someone I can call for you?" he asked. "Your sister maybe?"

She shook her head. "No, no, thank you, captain."

"I would rather someone be here with you."

"I can…I can call Logan."

"Let me call him for you, for my own piece of mind."

She handed him her phone as she fished out her keys. He found Logan in her contacts list and called him. When he was told what had happened, Logan promised Hannah he would head right to Alex's place.

The captain handed Alex her phone. "Logan is on his way. Do you want me to stay until he gets here?"

"That's not necessary, captain."

He moved closer to her and very softly said, "I've known Bobby for a very long time, and I know..." He paused. "...I know he loved you very much. And I know you love him. I can't tell you how sorry I am. If there is anything I can do, anything at all, don't hesitate to call me, any time."

"Thank you, captain."

Hannah squeezed her arm and returned to his car. She watched him leave and went into the house.

'I'm sorry.' They're always sorry, she thought bitterly. They always said they were sorry, and then they moved on to destroy more lives. She had lost the man she loved, and all they could say was they were sorry. She was the one who had to find a way to move on, to continue her life with him gone from it. She had done it once. How was she supposed to do it again? What had she done to deserve losing her love, not once, but twice? Sitting on the couch, she buried her face in her hands and sobbed. Oh, Bobby…


Victor Kyle hesitated just inside the door, his hands balled into fists. He could feel their grief, and his heart lurched. Another set of lives destroyed by just a few words. He turned and reached for the doorknob, but a voice stopped him. "Just where are you going, Doctor Kyle?"

Kyle clenched his fists. "I hate lying to families, destroying lives! It's not right!"

"Not families, doctor, co-workers. You are well paid for your silence."

Kyle turned to face the big, muscular man who stood behind him. "Sometimes I wonder if it's worth it."

"Then think of the children whose lives are saved by the money we give you. We need this man, but in order for him to be effective, Robert Goren must die."

"Yeah, well, I just told his captain and his partner that he did."

"We will take over from here. You know what you have to do."

"You're a bastard, Gallagher."

"Just remember your place, doctor."

Scowling, he turned on his heel and returned to the man who was now dead to the few who loved him. He wasn't out of the woods yet. Victor Kyle still had a life to save.


Alex was still on the sofa, quietly sobbing, when a knock sounded from the door. She hesitated, but the knock sounded again. Slowly, she got up and went to the door. Pulling it open, she stood face-to-face with Mike. Silent, she stood there, looking at him, afraid to say anything. Her emotions teetered at the edge of her control. There was deep sorrow in his red-rimmed green eyes. "I left as soon as I talked to Hannah," he said.

No other words were necessary as she stepped forward into his waiting arms. He had been Bobby's best friend, and he was the only one she would allow to step into her grief. She cried against his chest as he held her and guided her toward the couch. It was a long time before she quieted, and even longer before she spoke. He gave her the time she needed.

"I warned him, Mike," she said finally, her head resting against his chest. "I told him I wouldn't be able to do this again."

"One a day at a time, honey. We'll just take it one day at a time. We'll do it together."

"What am I going to do without him? I went through this once. I can't…I can't do it again."

He kissed her forehead. "You'll get through it, sweetheart. I'll be with you every step of the way, I promise."

He had lost his best friend, but Alex…she had lost so much more, and he was sensitive to that. Several years ago, he and Bobby were playing pool when their conversation took an odd turn. He never did figure out how his friend's mind worked. One minute they were talking about pets they'd had as kids; the next, the conversation turned toward 'what if' scenarios. Bobby's biggest concern had been for Alex. He knew how difficult it had been for her to lose Joe. What if she had to go through it again? The thought terrified Bobby. Mike had promised that if anything ever happened to Bobby, he would take care of Alex. Mike Logan always kept his word.