Author's note

I'm sorry for the late update, but I hope you will enjoy it. A little smuffy time between Emma and Killian.


Like the first time

Emma knew she had to get back in the saddle, she definitely knew that sometime in the near future it was bound to happen, but somehow she had an internal barrier which didn't allow her to even think about it. It was around a month when she first recognizes Killian's hungry eyes on her while she was nursing Liam. Really? REALLY?!

She did her best to satisfy her babyson's needs and thanks to Regina's potion it all worked well but satisfying her husband's needs never crossed her mind in her daily routine between diapers, nursing and burps.

Killian had relived his job as a deputy 3 weeks after Liam's birth and was back on track but for her everything was still new and taking care of their newborn and the household really took a number out of her.

And there she was again, nursing her son while her husband rubs her back and watches them. She feels his hungry stare and as soon as she puts Liam down in his grib and her breast away in her nursing bra. She feels his mouth hot on her shoulder, peppering it with small kisses while his hand crept in front of her to reach for said breast.

She sighs as she feels the evidence for his need poking into her back. His movements become hungrier and he turns her around and as she start to speak to him his mouth is on hers, devouring her in every sense of kissing.

They come up for air and he looks at her with so much passion in his eyes she really feels sorry for him.

He takes her hand and tries to lead her to their bedroom but she stops him in front of the stairs.

"I can't" she shakes her head in defeat. He looks at her a flash of hurt is seen in his expression.

"Killian I love you, you know that right?" She gives him a light kiss on his lips. "But I can't. I've just given birth to Liam. It doesn't feel right.."

"Emma, it's been 6 weeks now. I'm sure you are little anxious but I promise as soon as we are back on track it will be like before Liam is born" His hope is back that he has found the right words. She sees the bulge in his jeans, god he really waited 6 weeks for his first move on her, which must be hard for him, she is sure, but she doesn't feel ready and so she just shakes her head and turns around to make the dishes in the kitchen, he doesn't follow

15 minutes later she feels him behind her again. He embraces her and gives her a soft kiss.

"I love you too."

She settles in their new routine and Liam is a really nice little boy. His pauses at night are getting longer and longer and that means she gets more sleep and she feels like a whole new person.

She has turned down Killian's advances now for many times. Hell they even had a fight about that.

"Swan, I'm just a man, I have my needs. You know that because not so long ago you had these needs too" he exclaimed after another failed attempt of connecting with her like man and woman are supposed to do.

"Yes, but I can't bear it right now. You didn't press a little water melon through your cock and had some serious issues with healing of said cock" He only looks at her confused.

"And by cock I mean my vagina" she snorts.

"I want to be near you, I want to kiss you, to touch you, I just don't want to that" She gestures between her and his lower body-parts.

"And who says I didn't want that?" he is really angry now.

"Because it always turns into something more and you know it! I feel pressured by you!"

That's then all hell went loose.

"I exert pressure on you? Are you losing your mind, love? All I want to do is to be near you, to exchange some loving touches maybe more but nothing more than you want to!"

He takes his jacket, whistles after Lady and stalk to the back door.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"Out! I need some air" and he vanishes into the backyard. She breaks down in tears unsure how everything could change so much between them.

So she goes to bed, Liam's asleep already and she is still crying when she hears the door open.

He lies down behind her and just embraces her, holds her and repeats like a mantra.

"I'm sorry, I love you" and they both fell asleep.

After that incident she feels that he tries hard to earn her faith again. He touches her in every situation he has the chance to and kisses her very often, but nothing more. When he sees that she's tense he offers to massage her, when he feels she must be exhausted he let her in a bath and takes Liam so that she has little time for herself and after 2 weeks she feels, that she wants to touch him too.

It's around 2,5 months after Liam's birth that they are lying in bed together kissing slowly, sensually. She feels his hard cock poking into her thigh but she feels in the mood to try it and so her hand moves and for the first time in nearly 3 months her hand cups his bulge and he moans into her mouth at the initial touch. His kisses are getting hungrier and his hips bucks erratically into her hand.

"Gods, love, I missed your touch"

His hands roams under her shirt, cupping softly her breast as he rolls himself above her, grinding now with his stone hard cock into her center.

A moan escapes her mouth and she feels his hand above her waistband. Hesitantly he looks into her eyes and she nods as an affirmation. God she feels like a teenage girl before her first time. He doesn't waste a second and soon she is bare in front of him.

"You're a vision Emma, even more beautiful than before" and to her surprise not a hint of lie is in his words.

He takes of his trousers too and now they are exploring each other body like they weren't a couple for a longer time. Her hands roam through his chest-hair, drawing circles on his chest while they roam deeper and deeper until she is holding his hot cock in her hands, pumping it softly. He on the other side is working on her as well, tasting her, caressing her. His fingers wander between her fold, rubbing soft circles on her clit. She sighs because it feels different, but a good kind of different.

She increases the speed of her ministrations but stops to his dismay soon after.

She grins at him.

"I want you, Killian!"

He is startled for a moment but soon eager as any teenage boy would be at his first time. He tests her readiness and his disappointed that his ministration doesn't seem to have the same effect as in the past.

She only smiles at him and reaches for her bedside drawer to pull out a tube of lube.

"I've never needed that on a woman before" he seems to be defeated.

"It's me Killian. Liam's birth destroyed some nerves down there. I think it will get better in time, but for now I want you and even if it seems otherwise" she kisses him "I want you" Thank god Whale has convinced her to get a Loop last time he checked on her !

He doesn't need a second invitation. He uses the lube and soon he is in her.

It feels strange at first and he hesitates as well, memorizing the feeling of finally being reunited with her.

She pushes her hip up to give him the sign to move, and wow how he moves. At first they seem to be out of rhythm but soon they are back on track. It feels fantastic!

"God Killian, I wasn't aware of how much I missed it" she moans between his blows.

She feels her orgasm building up deep inside of her. His movements are becoming more erratic and he pants, moans and cries out her name between the hungry kisses they're sharing. The speed rises and she isn't aware that she screams his name, god, really really loud when she peaks but he is no better. He never cried like this when he came before and it feels so fantastic that she rushes over the edge a second time.

Killian crushes down on her, panting, fighting to regain his breath again, his cock still twitching inside of her spurting out his last drops of seed.

She kisses his cheek and both smile at each other with sweaty faces.

Thank god that Henry isn't there and Liam is a good sleeper.