Sorry this on is so short, But I'm sleepy.
When Merlin had arrived to his flat in the city Arthur, now Oliver, was already kept waking up to check on him. He was sleeping in his new crib by Merlin's bed. He was waiting for the young child to start crying again. Or to have something be wrong with him now that he's not near his mother, but the newborn slept peacefully on his stomach. His tiny head rested on it's right cheek and little feet twitched every now and again.
Thankfully Merlin had read somewhere in his long life, that newborns shouldn't be wrapped in a blanket when they sleep, because it could choke them. He was worried about him being too cold in his drafty apartment, though, so he cut up one of his tank tops and hemmed him a makeshift nightgown.
He seemed okay, but Merlin kept waking up from his half sleep because of nightmares of the boy somehow getting hurt in the hour he was away from him. Maybe choking himself on the crudely made outfit, getting his adorably large feet stuck in the bars at the top of the crib and breaking his leg, or waking up and screaming in the only way babies can when he saw Merlin's face. Just like he insisted on doing to his mother. His new flesh and blood.
Merlin might have known the pratish prince, and then the clotpole king, but this wasn't him. It was the same soul and face fit into a different man. How should he act around this Arthur? How should he act around Oliver Dow?
As Merlin stared at the pink newborn sleeping in that ugly nightgown made from his own shirt, he realized sadly that he couldn't keep this child. No matter how long he has waited for Arthur to return, he could not keep this baby boy locked up indoors with him where he could never die again. Where he could keep him safe.
Merlin needs to find him a place. A nice home and people to care for him. He would always stay near by for whenever Arthur needed him, but he couldn't fill a innocent's head with stories about a place called Camelot, that no one believes in anymore, and a wizard named Merlin that would have done anything for his mighty king.
If he remembers his last life, than Merlin will fill in the blanks for him. On the off chance that he doesn't ever remember, however, Merlin will let him live in any way he chooses to. Merlin will just take up the part of the guardian angel that hides in the shadows.
"I don't know if I could take waiting to be next to you for another day, let alone years more." Merlin's voice was soft, as to not wake the newborn, and broken. He was much too close to tears for his liking. "I will never leave you, my lord, but I might be a little harder to see than I want to be."
At least this way, there was no chance of Arthur calling him Daddy.
