I, Giselle Narcissa Malfoy, hate many things in my life.
For starters I hate my name; Giselle. When I was younger I hated it because it wasn't as fancy or as pretty as 'Adonis' or 'Scorpius', and in fifth year I started hating it even more because James Potter decided "Jizz-face Giselle" was the funniest nickname in the entire world and every time since that day he coined the nickname I involuntarily think of ejaculation every time someone calls me 'Giselle'. Which is precisely why I throw an absolute fit when any one refers to me by my given name, I much prefer 'Elle', or for the select few i.e. Dad or my favorite brother, Adie, 'G'. I blame my mother for my horrible name, but then again I blame my mother for a lot of things ever since she left us. Every time I voice this opinion to Dad he just ruffles my hair and reminds me that I was named after one of the stars in Scorpius' constellation because the two of us would always be destined for greatness when we worked together. At which point, I always remind him that, that couldn't possibly be true seeing as both me and Scorpius were accidents and we're probably just destined for disappointment. Dad says we weren't accidents, just merely unexpected. I see right through him and his euphemisms.
I hate how people have mixed feelings about my dad and how people never know how to regard him. Yes, I understand he was a Death Eater back in the day, but come on! That was like twenty years ago, and if you stop and think about the circumstances he was in back then, he really can't be faulted. My crazy grandfather with his bigamist ideals, that he truly believed, which he had taught to my dad since his birth, and by forcing the whole Death Eater business upon him to "uphold the family honor" bullshit; and if you stop and think about it my dad was pretty much sold into the Death Eaters. I was never shielded of my dad's past. He told each of us when we were little of how ashamed he was and that what he did was terrible and he should have been locked up for them. Which makes me appreciate my dad; he's not like Grandfather who revels in how he "got off so easily." I'm pretty sure my dad wanted to be sentenced, if only to show the world he was truly repentant. Dad also told us that a lot of people would try and take out their anger towards Voldemort and the Death Eaters on us because he played such a significant role in the Second War. But he always made sure that we were never personally attacked for it. I laugh at people who tell me my dad is a terrible, ruthless man and he probably raised us to be just as evil as him. Take a look at any of us kids and tell me that my dad is evil. Near impossible. And, that's only because I'm what some might call a "bitch."
Despite how much I love my dad, I hate how messed up my stupid family, as a whole, is. My crazy, senile grandfather, who wrote a very angry three foot letter detailing to me all of the pain and disgrace I have brought upon the Malfoy name through my "publicly humiliating actions" last week after my lovely Prophet hit stands. Yea, like you haven't done that already for all of us Grandfather. Dad doesn't get on too well with Grandfather; ever since he got away without a sentence after the second war he hasn't felt the need to actually repent, whereas, Dad most definitely has. But, where I mutely ignore Grandfather and all of his antics, Dad puts up with him because they've been through "true horrors" together. I've been through horrors with Scorpius but that doesn't mean I put up with him, he's an annoying idiot. Scorpius is my younger brother by three years and an absolute freak. The only times we get along are when we're bonding over shared hatred for the same thing, for example, James Potter. I hate James because he's an annoying spaz whose sole existence is to make my life unbearable. Scorpius hates James because James hates him. Sometimes I can't say I blame Potter. On the other hand, my older brother, Adonis, is probably the coolest person on the entire face of the Earth. He's nice and charming, and everybody loves him because he's so wonderful. Adie graduated three years ago and now plays quidditch for Puddlemere United as one of their starting Chasers; he's kind of a big deal.
I hate Astoria Greengrass. I reluctantly call her my mother solely because she gave birth to me. She left us when I was eight and I have subsequently hated her ever since.
I hate it when Scorpius invites Albus Potter over to our house during summer holidays. Fate decided to mock Dad and Mr. Potter when Albus got sorted into Slytherin and Scorpius was the first person to break the deafening silence that had permeated the Great hall after the shocking sorting of Albus into Slytherin, by standing on his chair and leading the entire school in a round of applause. They've been attached at the hip ever since and while they are individually two of the most annoying people I have ever met, when together, I am driven to the point of pure insanity where I literally would like to kill small animals.
Al arrived two nights ago and ever since then they have been running throughout the manor screaming and laughing like they're first years again. For all Dad cares, as long as they don't set anything on fire they can do whatever the hell they want. Which is total bull shit, because I got yelled at the other day because I accidentally turned Scorpius orange.
Something slams against my door and I have no doubt in my mind that it's the two idiots up to no good. Retreating from my room to yell at them I'm quickly hit in the face with what looks like a dead ferret on a string that smells like shit, gasoline, and throw up.
"SCORPIUS!" I scream at the top of my lungs as I hear the two freaks giggling away.
"I HATE YOU!"
Being James Potter means I don't hate much about my life. If I were to sit back and look at it from afar, I'd come to the conclusion that my life is actually pretty fucking awesome. So the things that I do hate come down to two things.
One, I hate ugly people. I know that sounds "just awful" as people have told me whenever I make my opinion for the genetically challenged known, and if my mum ever heard me saying that out loud she'd have my hide for it. But it's true. Ugly people are really just eyesores on us all and I firmly believe that they should be eradicated. Yes, eradicated, I'm not as dumb as most would like to believe. I'm talking to you Jizzy. I just don't like having to look at them.
Second of all, I hate being alone. It probably has to do with the fact that my family is literally too large to count without getting confused, and I have never had to be alone for anything ever. But whatever. It's not a big deal. There's always been someone older than me to take care of me when I need it and there's always been someone smaller than me to pick on when I'm bored, it's the perfect set up. It's probably because I don't like being alone or whatever, but since the tender age of thirteen I, The Great James Potter has made damn sure there has been a continuous stream of girls throwing themselves at my feet. Call me arrogant, but the girls love me. And I love them.
So much so, that I am currently in Madame Malkin's and not even throwing a fit about it. Cammie's looking through the racks of robes and I'm about 97% positive she wants me to buy her something judging from the way she keeps throwing glances from things in her hands to me. Hate to break it to you sweetie, but that will not be happening. I'm growing quite bored of her presence and know just what to do to rid myself of her when the door to Madame Malkin's is thrown open ceremoniously and distracts me.
"That's what I said! Did I not tell you that you would have to watch out for Donovan because all he does is cob? I specifically told you as soon as you told me you were playing Montrose that Tate only plays him because he has pointy elbows." This statement is uttered by none other than a girl's voice, which is probably the sexiest thing in the world: a girl truly knowing how quidditch works. However, my woody is shot straight down when I look up and see none other than the thorn in my back side, Giselle "Jizz Face" Malfoy, striding throughout the shop like she owns the place with her older brother in tow.
I'm utterly torn when I see the two of them. I cannot stand any of the Malfoys, save for Adonis, he was always the absolute coolest guy in school he went through everything like prefect, quidditch captain, and head boy without being a Malfoy or a douche. Which are kind of synonymous when you stop and think about it. And now that he's out of school he's off playing professional quidditch, he's a genius in the air and everybody is talking about him. I may or may not have a man crush on him. But I'll deny that until the day that I die. So, on the one hand I would love to go up and talk to him, maybe get an autograph, you know the normal things you do when it comes to your little brother's best friend's quidditch superstar brother. I do not however, want to interact with SheMalfoy even in the smallest capacity. I've made up my mind. We're just going to leave.
"Come on Cam, we're going." I say trying to not draw attention towards either of us.
"Wait, I think I want to try this on. Wouldn't I look like, super sexy in this color Jamie Poo?" Oh god. I cannot be dealing with this right now. We're bringing out the big guns here.
"No. It actually would end up making you look fatter than the color you have on already does so put that back on the rack and wipe that gob smacked look off your face, because we're leaving." It works. Cammie silently puts the robes she'd been throwing in my face and dejectedly starts to follow me out the shop. We pass by the Malfoys and I keep my head turned away from them hoping to not get noticed.
"Isn't that James Potter?" I hear Adonis ask Malfoy under his breath. I can feel her gaze on me but keep my eyes on the door.
"Stop, he is not with that troll Camilla Hanes. I mean, I knew he didn't have standards, but really?" I feel like she's made no effort in keeping her voice any kind of low and I can tell Cammie has heard because she utters some pitiful noise from behind me. And to think, I just wanted a nice day out in London. Casually I look over my shoulder and feign excitement when I lay eyes on Malfoy.
"Ah, Jizzy! How have I gone this entire summer without seeing that lovely fake blonde head of yours?" I ask loudly. She looks up at me with a look of contempt and hatred. It's truly a beautiful sight seeing someone so awful look at me like that.
She stays where she is and quite tamely only makes the snide remark of, "Nice house shoes Potter, I was under the impression your family had finally got out of living in squalor, but I guess not all can be right in the world for you people." Her brother gives her a reproachful look which she ignores quite skillfully.
"Oh that's right, I heard you're finally done sleeping with Krum. Bet you had to dress up so you could pick up another ugly, rich guy to put up with you."And with that, I bid you adieu Jizz Face.
If you haven't seen on my profile, I have a tumblr that I put up the outfits I envision the characters in in key scenes throughout the fic just for an extra funsie. Check them out here and enter the password 'mpjd' to get into the site: mpjdoutfits. tumblr. com
