"Well, technically it was his machine," she replied, and then started giggling at her joke; eventually falling on the couch, her laughter subsiding and her eyes began to droop. Nick was now pacing, wondering what he should do. He didn't know if calling Grissom to explain would help, or just make things worse. He heard a soft sigh and looked over to see Catherine passed out on her couch. One thing was certain; when Catherine woke up tomorrow she would not be happy…

Nick walked over and scooped her up into his arms, carrying her to her bed, setting her down gently, and pulling the fluffy comforter up to her chin. He took in her tear-stained face and felt his heart sink again. She had definitely dug herself into a deep hole.

Nick debated whether or not he should stay. He looked at the clock and was surprised to see the time. Nick's shift started in just a few hours, and although he would have liked to stay until she woke up, he needed sleep, not to mention a shower. He finally decided a note would suffice. The note explained the situation briefly, but Nick was hoping she would remember at least some of it. He crept quietly back in her room and left the note on top of her alarm, which he turned on for her. Although she needed her sleep, Nick knew she would be angry if she was late to work. He walked out, closing the door softly behind him and left.


The blaring of Catherine's alarm was not a pleasant wake up call for a woman with a severe hangover. She stretched her arm out as far as it would go, pushing aside some papers or something as she shut it off with a vicious slap. She sat up slowly, clutching her forehead and groaning. The pounding in her head was so great she wouldn't have been surprised if an anvil was resting on it. As she slowly took in her surrounding she realized she was still in her clothes from the night before. What the hell happened? She wondered. As she tried to piece it together all she could remember was going to the bar, drinking… a lot, something about Bonnie Tyler… and Nick! Nick had driven her home, and then… what? Catherine deduced that she must have passed out and Nick had put her in her bed, and even set her alarm. She made a mental note to thank him and got out of bed, heading unsteadily to the medicine cabinet.


Catherine entered the crime lab a few hours later, her shower and Advil leaving her feeling refreshed, although she was still a little down-hearted. But it was as if her burden wasn't so heavy, like she had relieved herself of some of it, although she didn't know why. As she walked into her office to check out the new assignments she saw Nick out of her window, walking out of the lab with Greg. She hustled out again and tried to catch up, calling his name, but he had gone, probably on a case. Catherine decided not to call him, she had a lot of work to do, and would just have to catch up later.


As Catherine sat down, for what seemed like the first time that day, she sighed. She had just wrapped up her double shift, and she was beat. But, being a supervisor meant her job wasn't quite over yet. She looked over at her clock and it read 3 am. She sighed and pulled a memo towards her, deciding to just do a few before calling it a night. As she worked she found her mind straying. First it went to Nick, she had not had the opportunity to talk to him, they had been out of the lab and then out on location at different times the whole day, and she was the only one left now. But after pondering this for a few moments she found her thoughts shifting, as they always seemed to do, back to a different man. As her thoughts focused on Grissom she felt a weird sense of déjà vu. A sudden flash of memory hit her: the day they had been sitting at a restaurant, waiting for Brass, who was late as usual. He had told her he missed her tush. She smiled as she remembered, but her eyes clouded over. Why was she suddenly feeling so nostalgic all of a sudden?

She tried to concentrate on her work, but she found herself losing her train of thought, her eyes glazing over as exhaustion began to take over. Just as she felt her eyes begin to lose the fight to stay open, a knock sounded at her door. She looked over at the clock once more and 4:30 blazed out at her in bold red colours.

"Come in," she called cautiously. An audible gasp escaped her lips as she took in the person who entered. "Gil?" She asked completely shocked. "What are you doing here?" He looked good, much more relaxed and laid back. Catherine silently cursed, because she knew she probably looked like hell. Grissom just looked at her, and didn't say anything at first, he almost looked nervous. "Is something wrong?" She asked, panic laced her voice.

"No, no I'm fine," he finally said, walking over to sit in a chair directly opposite her. "I actually came because I was worried about you."

"About me?" She asked in confusion. He nodded and searched her face, in that knowing, probing way of his. "Honestly I'm fine," she laminated, trying to kill his piercing look. "Granted being supervisor does mean putting in a few more hours, but I can handle it."

He shook his head, "I was talking about you, not your job." Catherine was used to Gil being cryptic, but now she was honestly confused, and slightly angered.

"How would you even know if something was wrong with me?" She surprised even herself with the hostility in her voice. "You haven't called or even wrote me two sentences of an e-mail since you left."

"I know, I know," he said, his genuine tone of regret making her anger fade. "That's another reason why I wanted to talk to you in person, to apologize."

"What's the other reason?" She probed. He looked up at her, his face serious with a tinge of worry.

"How long have you been drinking Catherine?" He asked, "And I'm not talking about one a night, I'm mean excessively."

"What the hell are you talking about?!" She all but shouted, "I have not been going out and getting drunk every night. Just because I may have some problems, and just because my past may be a little sketchy does not mean that I've turned into an alcoholic! I care about my job more than that. Maybe if you actually kept contact you'd know that… Even though you haven't I'd still hope you'd think better of me." She looked at him, hurt shining in her eyes.

"Well what am I supposed to think when you call me completely intoxicated at four in the morning?"

Catherine's eyes widened in shock, "I… I what?"

"Last night you called me and left a… colourful voicemail. I caught the first flight out I could."

"Gil, I swear that was the only time I've done that. It was just… I had so many emotions hitting me at one time I needed a release… What did I say?" It was a question she feared, but knew she needed to ask. Grissom was unsure how to respond, now that he knew she was alright and not spiralling downward out of control he felt nervous.

"You really can't remember?" Catherine could have sworn he sounded disappointed and she closed her eyes, racking her brain. She could remember Nick telling her to get off the phone, but what had she said before that… Oh god, she had said something about Sara. And her tush. Oh no… Her expression seemed to give him an indication she was piecing the puzzle back together.

"Please tell me I didn't," she begged her eyes remaining closed; she was too scared to open them.

"Is it true Cath?" He asked and his tender nuance caused her eyes to shoot open. She stood up and crossed the office, her back to him.

"Even if it was, what does it matter now? You're… wherever you are. You're free from the lab… you have Sara back." She could barely say the last part, causing it to come out as a whisper. She heard a rustling as he got up out of the chair and crossed over to her. He put a hand on her shoulder and gently turned her around.

"Sara and I stopped seeing each other weeks ago. Even without the pressure of our jobs it didn't work out. Then when I got your message I realised how I had treated you and how stupid I had been to not see that my love for you was requited." She looked up at him, completely taken aback.

After allowing herself a few moments to process this she finally spoke. "So… you're saying… that for all these years…" She couldn't bring herself to say it. He took a step back, his arm falling down to his side, fixing her with a gaze that was full of tender emotion.

"Yes Catherine, I love you." She said nothing, just took a step towards him, lifting her arm up to-

"What the hell Gil?!" She cried as she smacked him hard across the arm. His shock at her reaction gave her the chance to continue. "You've been pushing me away, sending me mixed signals," she continued to advance on him, her finger poking him in the chest to emphasize her point. "I'm flirting with you, I'm flirting with Sara. Oh look! Here's a chance we could be together, no- wait, I'll go with Sara!" She had him up against the door by now and she just stood there, chest heaving as she tried to catch her breath. His feelings of guilt kept him mute and she continued with a new softness, apparently having calmed down a little bit more. "All that hurt and the whole time we could have-" She broke off, throwing her hands up in frustration, a hiss of a sigh escaping her lips.

Grissom seemed to have recovered from her outburst and dared to ask, "We could have what?" She turned to look at him, her gaze difficult to read. It wasn't until she began walking towards him again that he braced himself for another attack. He closed his eyes, his body tensing as he prepared himself. She startled him by pressing her lips gently against his. It amazed them both how much they had underestimated what kissing the other would feel like. Catherine was sure, had Grissom's arms not wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to him, her legs would have given out beneath her. The sudden explosion of fervour that their one kiss was emanating was just as surprising as it was thrilling and passionate. Catherine finally pulled away, gasping for breath as she smiled up at him.

"We could have been doing that," she said breathlessly. He smiled and pulled her close to him, wrapping his arms securely around her body, his chin resting on her head.

"I'm so sorry Catherine," he whispered in her ear.

"Me too," she sighed. "Think of all the time we could have had…"

"We could have the rest of our lives… if you wanted." She twisted a bit, lifting her head up to meet him eye-to-eye.

"But… you've moved on; you have a life somewhere else," she didn't want to talk him out of it, she wanted just the opposite in fact, but rationality had to be factored in.

"Being away from the lab seemed like a god-send at first, but as time wore on I missed it. My job, the people, and you." She smiled at that and laid her head back down on his chest.

"Well," Catherine began after a few minutes, "if you need a place to stay while you're getting everything sorted out…"

He chuckled, "A little forward are we?" She looked up at him and smiled seductively.

"After 20 years, you bet your tush I am!"

A/N: Eeeeeeeee, I am so sorry it's taken me so long to update this! I've been ridiculously busy and honestly have barely had time to sleep and do homework, let alone anything else. But here it is! And with the closing of my play next week I have some more story ideas brewing in my noggin, so prepare yourselves for more Grillowsness! :D