Author Notes: Another update coming soon. This story is one of my priorities right now; I'm really getting into it! 8D
CHAPTER 2
At school, most of the teachers hated me. All right, well, all of them hated me. I was a constant disruption to their class, they said. I prevented others from learning. But really, I knew why they hated me. Because they were scared. They were the teachers, and they were supposed to have the power. But suddenly this little girl had come along and embarrassed them in front of their whole class. They just didn't know what to do. So they did what teachers do best –they punished me. Repeatedly. On some days I could slide through my classes without any major hazards. But other days, it was as if they were out to get me.
Today was one of those days. Leaving third period, I rushed to fourth. Carly wasn't in this one with me –but Freddie was. I reminded myself I had time to get to class, that I didn't need to hurry. I managed to slow to a trot. But as I entered the classroom, I had a funny feeling that the time had nothing to do with why I was racing. Sliding into my chair, I looked up just in time to see Mr. Harms glare at me. I scowled instinctively, and he sneered. Watch yourself, the expression read.
Of course, I was innocent. If I wasn't, he would have issued me a detention slip already. But until he confirmed foul behavior, he was not authorized to punish, punish, punish –as was his nature. Glancing to the left, I saw Freddie slumped in his chair. Great, I thought sourly, More of his sulking. Can't he just get over his aunt already and start acting normal? Looking back over at him, I regretted my harsh judgment. He wasn't sulking. His aunt's death had obviously really gotten to him. "Hey," I whispered. He barely acknowledged me, but I was lucky to catch the flick of his hand in recognition of my attempts.
I thought about what I could say next. I had a feeling he didn't want to talk about his aunt –or maybe he did. But I knew if I struck up a talk about that, I wouldn't be able to think of anything to say without recycling what I'd said yesterday. Angrily I burst out in a fierce whisper, "Geez, would you cut this crap out?!?" Mr. Harms looked up from his desk, giving me a glare similar to the one he'd shot me previously. Yet, somehow, this one was more vindictive, a victory glare rather than a warning.
"Miss Puckett," He began, and I could sense the lofty, taunting grin in his voice, "Would you care to share what you're whispering about to mister Benson?" He removed his reading glasses, tucking them in his shirt pocket.
I looked at Freddie, who had stiffened noticeably. He looked straight ahead, but there was a glint of worry in his eyes. "Er, no," I stuttered, "No, I wouldn't." Freddie relaxed a bit.
"Very well then," replied Mr. Harms, "Proceed to the principal's office straight away." Groaning, I stood, tossing my backpack over my shoulder. I stormed out of the classroom, barely catching the sympathetic look Freddie threw me before I slammed the door. After I'd kicked the wall enough times to let my anger fade, I made my way to the principal's office, plopping down in the chair across from Principal Franklin's. I propped my feet on his desk, and when he turned around, he didn't look surprised to see me.
"Hello, Sam." He smiled politely.
"Hey, Franklin." I replied. I didn't have permission to call him that, but he had long since abandoned his futile attempts to stop me.
"What is it today?" He sighed.
I shrugged.
"Come on, now. Don't make this difficult. We both know you must've done something." He gave me a doubtful look and I cracked.
"I was talking in class," I mumbled.
"There we are. See, that wasn't so bad." Principal Franklin smiled. I rolled my eyes in disgust. "How many warnings did Mr. Harms give you?" Boy, did this man know me. When had he memorized my schedule?
"None." Another one of those looks. "None!" I insisted. "I walked into class and he looked at me funny, then I whispered one thing to Freddie and he blew up on me." I threw my hands up in the air for emphasis.
"Alright." Principal Franklin sighed. "I'll be the one to give you a warning, then: If you get sent here one more time this week, you'll have detention. For a very long time. I'm sick and tired of you being in here all the time." He waved his hand dismissively.
I left without a second thought.
The rest of the day was routine, and luckily I didn't have any more incidents. After school I stopped by my place and dropped off my things, grabbing a chicken wing from a box of leftovers on the counter. As I made my way to Carly's, I ate the meat; When I was done, I held the bone between my teeth. When I got there, I used my key to enter.
What I saw made the bone clatter to the ground.
Carly and Freddie. Kissing. It wasn't a long kiss, more of a peck, but I had witnessed it. I stood, frozen, While Carly notified Freddie of my presence, as his back was to me.
"What are you doing, just kissing every girl who's got lips?" I asked him shrilly, forgetting our secret. He froze just as I did a minute ago.
"Wait, what?" Carly was confused, and she had the right to be; Only I didn't acknowledge that through my sheer rage and shock. "What's that supposed to mean, Sam?" She asked warily.
"Er, nothing." Freddie hurried to answer before I could. "Nothing." He was embarrassed about it, I could tell. But at the moment, I didn't care. He was kissing Carly. Kissing Carly. And she didn't fight back. The girl who would never love him didn't fight back.
"No, Freddie. I think she's got a right to know, don't you?" I sneered, failing to recognize the fear on his face as I rambled in my blind cruelty. "Three months ago. When I went to say sorry to him about announcing that he'd never been kissed? We kissed. Just to get it over with, you know? And now... well, now, I guess he's taking as many opportunities as he can get." I glared at Freddie.
"What?" Carly shrieked, jumping off the couch. "You kissed Sam? Sam?" She asked disbelievingly, and I was hurt.
"What, is there something wrong with that?" I hollered, glaring now at her. "Should I not be kissed?" I felt a pang of betrayal deep inside.
Carly looked guilty. "I think you guys should go." She murmured, and I felt another tremor of rage torrent through me.
"I agree." I answered hoarsely. Freddie simply stands, brushing past me as he walks out the door. Again I was hurt, but the feeling came with guilt; Why had I revealed our secret? That was our secret. We'd both promised never to tell anyone.
I'd betrayed his trust. Would he ever forgive me? I turned numbly and strode out the open door, not bothering to close it behind me. Instead of going home, I head to the fire escape, where Freddie went after I embarrassed him three months ago.
Where we kissed.
When I got there, I sat cross-legged on the cold cement, staring out into the night. I'd only passed by here since that night, afraid of regrets or wishes I might have if I stopped here. But now... Now I need to remember. I didn't realize it at first, but the smallest of tears rolled down my cheek. Was I crying? I wondered why as the tears began to come more frequently, though the flow was still slow. I couldn't remember the last time I'd cried. I had always been so tough, never had a reason to cry.
I'm crying? Who the hell did Freddie Benson think he was, to make me cry? Sam Puckett does not cry. I wiped the remnants of moisture away, forcing the waterworks to halt.
For the rest of the night I sat and wondered why. I wondered why I kissed Freddie in the first place, why I'd spilt our secret, and why Carly had kissed Freddie. Or why Freddie had kissed Carly.
But above all, I wondered why that had made me cry. Did I really care? That kid was getting what he wanted: Carly's love. So why did it bother me?
I fell asleep on the fire escape. It was a school night, but I decided to skip school. No one would miss me.
The next day I ran home during the school day to grab some food and a chair. My mom was at work, probably her last day. This one had lasted a week now, and that was more than long enough. I brought the things back to the fire escape, relaxing there. I watched the people below, throwing food at them for entertainment. After awhile I went back and grabbed a deck of cards and my PearPod, listening to music while I played solitaire with myself.
Briefly I wondered if this was what depression was like.
About an hour after school ended, Freddie showed up at the fire escape. Just what I needed. I scowled at him and continued listening to my PearPod. Sighing angrily, he pulled the plugs out of my ears. I looked up at him distastefully, but he had my attention now.
"How did you find me?" I grumbled.
"I talked to my mom," He began leaning against the railing. He looked remarkably like a model in that stance, and I slapped myself mentally for even imagining that. "She said she was hit on the head with a Cheez Puff on the way back from the grocery store today. I only knew one person who would do that." He smiled softly.
The silence was stifling.
"Why'd you come here?" He asked after a few minutes.
"Dunno." I muttered, but we both knew the answer.
"I didn't know... you'd be so mad. About me and Carly. I thought you'd just blow it off and make some rude comment later on." He admitted. I almost expected him to follow that up with, I never thought of you as an actual person with actual feelings. But he didn't. Another stretch of silence spread, each second putting more distance between us.
On the spur of the moment, I blurted, "I cried."
Freddie looked at me as if I were speaking German. I'd figured he would understand. I'd spilled his secret, so I had to sprout a new one between us.
Otherwise, I was just a bully to him. We would have no connection.
"After I came out here. I cried," I explained. He blinked.
"Oh. Sorry." He seemed to have gotten over his aunt. I guess he'd been forced to, with everything else going on. "I can't imagine you crying." He nearly whispered. "You're strong." I tried to decide if that was a compliment or an insult.
"Sometimes I really don't know that I am." I replied just as quietly, and I wasn't sure if he heard me, because he didn't say anything.
But I sure as hell wasn't about to repeat that.
In the moments of silence that followed, I wondered if we were going to kiss. I wasn't really sure. Things like that seemed to happen at the worst times.
But instead, he walked out, without even a goodbye.
What made me expect one?
