I didn't mention one of the most important beings yet, even though my begining had begun to soar prior to my immortality. Whether it was out of selflessness, pity, or maybe even some sort of cruel jest to test my sanity, Orexis let me have a taste of desire. His visits to me were not rare and often as a child I saw him in my reflection and dreams. It's easier to say I fell in love with a demonic being in a worshiping sense.
The day I grew bold enough to try touching him was the day I, for dramatic purposes, died for love. Yes, my curiousness led me to plunge into a freezing river, and my girlish fantasies begged for me to give myself to him in a 'poetic' way. I gave in to his temptation and haunting image, and felt mad for such things. He spoke to me as he dragged me out from my 'suicide', telling me that I would live. I have yet to forget that grin.
What I didn't know was what he meant. I had seen and heard of many drowning or freezing to death in the cold waters of my homeland, so why would I live at the cost of servitude he offered? No matter how I asked, the answer was the same. 'Silence.'. Our time together was distant, but in a sense he was always there next to me. Now, I am not saying we were a couple. He was a demon and I was a fool. Even now as I tell you this, I do not know what has become of him, nor do I necisarilly give much thought to him. As cold hearted as it sounds, I did not hate Orexis by any means. I never knew how he felt towards me, but I can assume he had some form of love reserved for me based on.. 'Actions'. We bonded because we had to. He needed time on Earth and I wanted time to survive. He lingered close by when he needed energy, which fatigued and wore me out completely. Not to mention the toll it took on my apperance. I've never seen myself past the age of fifty, and it was my new companion that gave me the gift of youth, though he said nothing of the cost. It wouldn't be until later in my life when I would be the one earning my beauty, that I would truly appreciate what he did for me.
However kind he acted, he was no different than any of the others I've made deals with. They all have a common interest. I didn't leave Orexis a virgin as I had met him that fateful day. And to be blunt with the dagger of honesty, we made love often at any chance we were given. I didn't mind it, I suppose. As far as I know I was the only one who could touch him, let alone see him. Not exactly the most gentle, I'll add. Then again, he wasn't the most rough or sadistic either. I let him control my body out of respect and gratitude. Sex consumes a great deal of my story for many reasons, mainly because it's how I managed to survive. The more perfect I look, the better my chances.
How do I explain him, my yakshini Master, to a stranger who lacks the correct eye to see and hear him? He was tall as most demons are. His hair was blacker than mine, and I suppose my hair is now black out of respect for him. It was he who gave me violet eyes to match his. But the fire his held, I dared not touch. He knew I would look different as time went by, and I was submitted enough to him to allow myself to be treated like a dress up doll. It was a game for him to see the various abilities he gave me, whether it be how long I could run, how long I could hold my breath.. As obnoxious as it was, we had fun.
Having said all this, he is still the reason I had to leave my family. And I will never forgive him.
