Disclaimer: Sadly enough, I don't own anything. This is written for pure enjoyment only and no profit to be gained!
A/N: I'd just like to make a quick note that this isn't a suicide fic. If I steer a story towards suicide, like I did in one of my other LOCI fics, I'd warn you first. I know that it's a touchy subject for some. Anyway, just thought I'd let you know. Enjoy! Oh, and this chapter is dedicated to Tigergorenrocks. She just had to have a new chapter sooner rather than later. =)
CHAPTER: 2
Bobby makes his way into One Police Plaza and quickly packs up what little items he needs. He ignores everyone, pretty much because they all ignore him, and goes about his business. He hopes Ross doesn't come barging out to bother him. After gathering what few items he needs, he turns and walks out of 1PP before he has to face him or her. He rounds the corner and decides to take the stairs if only to elude her just in case she's looking for him. Rationally he knows she won't come looking for him, but he can't take the chance. He's not ready to look her in the eyes; he's not ready to deal with her right now. He's not ready to face the fact that she's thought about him killing himself. It was evident and he's not sure if he should be happy she's thinking about him or not. It's just one more dilemma of his that'll be racing through his mind tonight when he tries to sleep.
And like everything else in the past few years, instead of trying to clear up the mess that would've been okay if she would've just minded her own fucking business, he quickly leaves and once again avoids clearing up the several problems Alex and him have in their partnership.
Really, though, what's the point anymore?
His eyes show defeat in them. He's ready to give up. He's burned out. He never thought he would be.
Bobby heads straight to his car, plops in, starts the engine and drives off. He makes it back to his apartment rather quickly. He opens his apartment door, slams it closed and then takes off his coat. After tossing his coat on the coat rack, he makes his way into his apartment and pauses. He looks down at his gun and pulls the holster off his belt with the gun still in it and tosses it on the table in disgust. He also tosses his cell phone, badge, and wallet onto the table next to his gun.
Does she really think I'd kill myself? He questions internally.
He wouldn't deny that he hadn't thought about it before, but he's never acted on those thoughts. He wouldn't deny picking up his gun after a few drinks. He'd even examined it once or twice and thought about it; about how easier it would be to just leave this world with one quick pull of the trigger, but he never turned it towards him. He's never aimed a loaded gun at himself before and figures he never will.
There's really no point to it, he concludes every time he fathoms the ludicrous idea. And she thought…
He knows people think he's crazy, but he thought Alex knew him better. He can't help but wonder how far gone she thinks he is. He was just trying to get inside Josh's head. He was trying to play him; just like he successfully did. He just wanted to mess with his head a little before he arrested him. He really didn't think Eames would freak out about it the way she did.
But I should've known…
Fuck.
He was happy it was Friday. He didn't have to go in until Monday morning unless he was called upon. He hopes Ross will call someone else in if a new case comes up. Bobby just wants the weekend to relax. He maneuvers his large frame through his kitchen and into his bedroom. He quietly kicks his shoes off and starts to change clothes, even undoing the first few buttons of his shirt so that his salt and pepper chest hair sticks out when he hears someone pounding on his door.
What the hell is she doing here?
He knows who it is. No one else in his life would pound on his door with such force, such anger let alone come to his place.
He sighs while trying his best to ignore the pounding, but can't. He storms out of his bedroom and heads straight for the front door. He swings it open, rather roughly, and to her surprise he doesn't say a word. He just opens the door and turns around and walks away; he knows she'll follow him in.
Alex storms in after him and is about to speak but before she can say a thing, he speaks.
"What do you want, Eames?" He sounds so tired.
"What do I want? I want an explanation, Bobby." She uses his first name; that's the first thing he notices. The second thing is the tone of her voice. She sounds almost upset, on the edge, worried; not at all angry like before.
He turns back around when he hears the door close.
"An explanation…?" He sighs and heavily plops down onto one of the chairs in the kitchen. He rubs his eyes with the palms of his hands.
He's just so tired.
"What are you doing?" She suddenly asks.
"I'm sitting here trying to figure out what you're doing here." He says exasperated. "I was trying to get out of my work clothes until you started pounding on my door." He adds with a tone of annoyance. He pulls his hands away from his eyes and looks at her just then. He immediately understands why she asked him the question she did. He sees her looking down at the table he's sitting at; his gun lying on top directly in front of him. "Eames—" He doesn't get any farther.
"Bobby, I need to know what you're intentions are." She says slowly and Bobby can't help but feel like he's back in college talking to one of his girlfriend's parents about his intentions.
"Eames, I'm not suicidal if that's what you're thinking. I did nothing wrong and I'm sick of constantly feeling like I did. I was never in any danger. I got the confession we needed…" He says and chooses to stand up so he's right in front of her. "And played him at the same time. I think the only thing you're upset about is the fact that I played you, too." He snarks and grins in a way she's never seen before.
He gets it all of a sudden. He did play her; he played her for a fool and she fell for it and she can't stand it.
And he didn't even see it coming; he was too engrossed in his newfound knowledge to pay any attention until he feels it.
Alex slaps him, hard, on the left side of his face.
"Fuck you." She spits out.
She turns to leave just then but he reaches out and grabs her by one of her wrists.
"We're not done here." He says and she can see the intensity in his eyes. It's back, the profound, burning look he sometimes gets is full-on again and she can't help but wonder how he turns it on and off so quickly.
"Let go of me." She says sternly while mirroring the intensive look on his face.
And she's surprised when Bobby complies almost immediately. He pulls his hand away as if she's on fire; he pulls his hand away almost too quickly and Alex can't help but wonder if he's afraid she thinks he'll hurt her. Before she can even contemplate his actions further, movement catches her eye. He's walking away from her. That's when she grabs him by the forearm to halt him in his place. Her grip is so tight on his forearm that it feels like a vice grip has got a hold of him.
He turns his head and looks at the arm she has a hold of first and then he turns his body back around to face her. When he turns back around the look in his eyes is enough to send her reeling backwards. He has so much pain in his eyes all of a sudden. His eyes are so dull; they lack emotion, they lack life again. They're not passionless but they're not lively either. She knows it's not just from the slap, it's from everything. And it scares her. She's not sure how one being can hold so much physical suffering and that's why she worries about him. She doesn't know how much more he can take.
"What do you want from me?" He whispers softly. She's taken aback by how much his voice has softened within a matter of a few seconds. That slap took the last of the fight out of him. She knows it. He looks deflated.
Every voice in her head was screaming 'no' but she ignores them all and does something she never allowed herself to do up until now. She acts on impulse, on instincts possibly and instead of answering him she reaches up to his face, yanks his head down and kisses him.
You. Just you.
A/N: Well, still liking and reading? Wow. I must say I'm very surprised by all the reviews I got. And even more so, a lot of the people that reviewed I didn't recognize. So nice to see new faces...er...names. =) Stay tuned for more. I haven't decided yet if the next chapter will be M. I think I'm going to break it up so there will be 4 chapters total (the 4th being Rated M). Thanks.
-Snyder-
