The Importance of Life
Mandy took Jane to the CBI office two days after his death to witness a discussion between Lisbon and Van Pelt. Lisbon invited Van Pelt into her office and bit her lip before telling her why she was there, "Grace… You're my best friend and I need someone to talk too, someone who will understand, someone who knew him." She spoke the last line quietly, but Van Pelt didn't miss it.
"Of course boss." She said with a smile.
Lisbon shook her head, "Call me Teresa, you do out of work after all and this is most definitely not a work related discussion." She said.
Van Pelt nodded and Lisbon continued, "I was in love with him." She didn't need to tell Van Pelt who him was; she knew that Lisbon was talking about Jane. Van Pelt reached across the table and took Lisbon's hand, "I know."
Lisbon bit back a sob as she continued her confession, "I never got the chance to tell him how I felt Grace and now I will never know what could have been and I hate to live on what if's, but not knowing is the worst feeling in the world. In this world you never know what is going to happen and I didn't ever get the chance to tell him how I felt. I should have just swallowed my pride and told him when I had the chance, but it's too late now." She quickly wiped a few tears away and Van Pelt nodded.
"I can't say I have ever experienced it, but I know it must be horrible. I also know that you are going to hate what I'm about to say, but you have to move on Teresa. You will find someone else and please don't live on what if's they eat away at you." Van Pelt told her friend, worry visible in her eyes.
Lisbon obviously saw the worry too because she nodded and said, "I know." Even though she had no intention of doing any of the things that Van Pelt had told her, Jane knew that much.
Van Pelt nodded and headed for the door, before she walked out Lisbon quietly said, "Thank you Grace."
Van Pelt smiled, "No problem." She said before leaving the office.
Lisbon put her head on the table and groaned, "I hate you Jane." She muttered to herself.
Mandy reached her hand out to Jane who gladly took it, grateful to get away from the broken Lisbon. It made him feel so guilty seeing her like that and knowing that he was the one who had broken her.
When Jane looked around he noticed they were in an unfamiliar apartment, but he could hear talking so followed the sound into the living area where he saw Van Pelt and a young man with brown-red hair sitting on the sofa talking. He assumed the young man was her little brother as Van Pelt had mentioned that she shared an apartment with her 18 year old brother who was at college in the area.
The young man said, "Well Grace, it sounds to me like you need to go pay Wayne Rigsby a visit."
Van Pelt hit him gently on the arm, but smiled, "I think your right. Now that I know how Lisbon feels knowing Jane died without knowing how she felt… I want him to know that I… that I-"
Her brother grinned, "Go tell the lucky guy that ya love him Grace." He smirked as she blushed.
"Okay!" She said with a triumphant grin, she grabbed her coat and kissed her brother on the cheek, "I'll see you later." She said.
The young man grinned wider, "Don't worry Grace, I won't worry about you if I don't see you tomorrow morning, I'll just know you had fun!" He winked at her and her blush deepened.
She walked out of the door and got into her car. Jane looked at Mandy in shock, but she only smiled and held out her hand which he took, preparing himself for the transportation into the future that made his stomach churn.
When he opened his eyes he found himself in yet another unfamiliar apartment, but considering the fact Rigsby was sitting on the couch flicking through TV channels he assumed it was Rigsby's apartment.
There was a knock on the door and Rigsby frowned wondering who would come to his door at this time of night, it was nearly midnight. Assuming it would just be his neighbour complaining that the TV was too loud he walked to the door in only his boxers and a T-Shirt. So when he opened the door to see Grace Van Pelt standing on his doorstep you could say he got the shock of his life!
She smiled sheepishly at him, "Hey Rigsby, I'm sorry I called round this late I just really needed to talk to you."
Rigsby nodded, "Sure, umm yeah. Come in." He said and she did.
She sighed as she looked at him, "I spoke to Lisbon today and I realized how much it must have hurt when Jane… "Her voice hitched and he nodded, "Its okay, you don't have to say it." He told her gently.
She nodded gratefully at him, "She never got the chance to tell him she loved him." Van Pelt said as she followed Rigsby to the couch and sat down with him. He muted the TV and nodded in agreement, "I know. If it had gone the other way, Jane would be the same."
Van Pelt took a deep breath, "Wayne…" Rigsby couldn't hide his shock at the fact she had called him by his first name, but quickly coughed to try and hide it, "Yes Grace…" He replied shocking her just as much.
She was biting her lip, "Well I guess the reason I came here was to tell you that if something ever happened to you and you didn't know how I felt… it would kill me. So I came here to tell you that… I'm in love with you Wayne." She whispered the last line, but she knew he had heard it. She didn't look up at him afraid of what his reaction would be, until he said, "Look at me Grace."
She lifted her head and noticed that he was very close to her, not even thinking about the rules of the CBI she closed the gap between them and captured his mouth in a passionate kiss. The kiss told her that he felt the same and when they broke away breathing heavily Rigsby whispered, "I love you as well Grace."
Jane had a small smile on his lips and he turned to Mandy who was watching him intently, "At least something good came of all this."
Mandy shrugged, "They were meant to be together Patrick. It would have happened anyway, with or without your death."
Mandy held out her hand once more and when Jane let go of it they found themselves alone at the CBI office. It was late and everyone had gone home. Jane sat down on his couch and Mandy joined him.
"Have you realized that the choice you were about to make is the wrong one yet Patrick?" Mandy asked hopefully.
Jane sighed, "I don't know. I mean I know they are all really upset which shocked me. After you and Laura… Well I didn't think anyone would ever care about me again or I would ever care about anyone again."
Mandy nodded in understanding, "Well how do you feel about them all?"
Jane thought for a moment, "Rigsby is a great laugh and one of my best friends. I find Cho very amusing as he rarely shows any emotion, but he's funny and also one of my best friends. Van Pelt is like the little sister I never had and I like making fun of her." He smiled slightly as he continued, "I just like to laugh at Minelli when he gets worked up into his angry moods and goes flying off the handle at everyone which is usually my fault…" He smirked, "Lisbon is really fun to wind up and if I can get a smile or a laugh out of her it makes my day. It's hilarious to wind her up all day until I really get under her skin, but when we want too we get on really well and have way more in common than I ever thought when I first met her."
Jane looked at Mandy who was grinning, "You know now that she loves you and you can no longer deny that you love her too. Maybe not as much as you loved me, but you do love her and you do want to be with her."
Jane didn't deny what Mandy had said; he only seemed to be in deep thought about it.
"The only thing holding you back is thinking that you are betraying me and Pat you aren't. I'm long gone, you can't live in regret. I want you to be happy again and I know that you will be happy with her and you know it too Pat." Mandy said smiling.
Jane bit his lip, "Maybe." He said quietly. He stood up, "It doesn't matter anyway. They are upset now, but give it a few months and everything will be back to normal."
Mandy sighed and rolled her eyes holding out her hand again. Jane took it and opened his eyes to find that they hadn't moved from their spot in the CBI office.
Mandy noticed his confusion and said, "We are now 6 months in the future. 6 months after your death."
A young handsome man with blonde hair and blue eyes was sitting on his couch, Jane eyed the man suspiciously, "He's sitting on my couch." He accused.
Mandy shook her head, "Your dead Patrick. Its not your couch anymore."
Jane's eye was then caught by Lisbon walking into the room and he couldn't hide the gasp that escaped his lips as he saw her. She looked deathly pale and horribly skinny. She had lost far too much weight and looked gaunt and corpse-like.
He looked at Mandy who gave him a sympathetic shrug and Jane looked back to the group. Lisbon briefed them on a case and left the building with the handsome man who had been on 'Jane's' couch.
Mandy grabbed Jane's hand and the next thing Jane knew he was following Lisbon and the handsome man down a narrow little side street somewhere in a nearby town.
The man asked, "Lisbon, do you ever smile?"
She shrugged, "I used too."
"Do you even have a heart?" The man asked in exasperation.
Lisbon turned around and shook her head, giving him a bitter smile she said, "My heart died along with Patrick Jane." The man obviously knew to end the matter there as he said nothing more as they walked along in eerie silence.
Jane was shocked at this revelation and turned to Mandy who asked, "Still think the choice you were going to make is the right one Patrick?"
Jane shrugged, "They will all get over it. Give it a few years and Lisbon will be married. She can't mourn me forever Mandy."
Mandy sighed, "Well if that's the role your taking on we aren't finished yet."
Jane groaned, "There is still more? How much more?"
Mandy smiled slightly, "I'm going to keep taking you further into the future until you realize that you were going to make the wrong choice or until the rest of your team mates die in the future without you." She stated and Jane knew it was going to be a very long and unforgettable night.
