Warners counterattack
Chapter 2
New York City
It was just a regular day in our apartment. Chandler went to work even before I woke up, and Ross and Rachel were also working. There were only three people in our house- Monica didn't go to work at her restaurant (she took a night shift), my wife Phoebe, didn't go to the Christmas tree store she opened last year (she didn't feel so good), and I was rehearsing for my new movie (American airlines sent me an offer to be in their safety video. I always flew with Delta, but a million dollars are a million dollars!). It was about half past nine, when we suddenly heard a knock on our door.
My wife said: "Maybe it's the pizza!"
Monica answered: "We didn't order pizza!"
And phoebe said: "I did! A large pizza with pepperoni, peppers, mushrooms, bacon, pineapple, mustard, hummus, chocolate, extra cheese, walnuts, cherries, green eggs and ham, one fish…uh, two fish, red fish, blue fish, whipped cream, carbon dioxide, grapes of fury, angry birds, the annoying orange, M&M's, dinosaur meat, gummy worms, cucumbers and Brussels sprouts!"
Monica: "Ew, you're sick!"
Me: "Can I have some?"
Phoebe: "But I thought you hate pineapple!"
Me: "But I want it today!"
Monica: "I'll open the damn door! Why can't you do anything here?"
Me: "Uh…actually, we all never do a thing. Just like Seinfeld- or should I say smurfeld."
But Monica didn't listen. She opened the door and three little creatures came into our apartment!
Monica: "Oh no! These…these are…oh no!"
We all knew them very well. They made all the way from Burbank, California to here, just to annoy us. They kicked us from our OWN apartment and locked us out, they made mess, and they threw an incredible amount of candies and snacks into Monica's mouth (it took her about two months of diets and exercises to lose all of the weigh she gained in that day).
Their names were Yakko, Wakko and Dot Warner.
I took my cell phone and dialed Chandler's phone number. 2…4…9…4…3…6…2… I said in our own made-up language:
"Ti yukhlikhz ekh hokh ekil!" (The warners are here again!)
He answered: "Mu yio. tio yom lifikh gun evdikh yo gogd tin ead." (No way. they will never come again after we kicked them out.)
I answered: "Ped eo zo tin! Vkho modom, siolo, emuolk, pmig gkhojakhz vod mulk okhs elt khot luazis!" (But I see them! Three little, zany, annoying, black creatures with long ears and red noses!)
And he said: "Uagio, uagio, eon gunolk!" (OK, OK, I'm coming!).
Chandler, Ross and Rachel came really quickly, but the Warners already made a mess. Wakko jumped on my bed, Yakko took a shower and Dot tried all of Rachel's perfumes. The first one to have enough courage to talk was Ross. He said: "Why are you here? I thought it was clear that our house don't welcome you anymore."
Yakko said: "No, but if you'll hum a few bars..."
Phoebe singed: "Hmmmmhmmmmhmmmmhmmmmhmmm, like house so not welcome you on!"
Dot broke the guitar. That new guitar that cost her 600 dollars! Now she really hurted her feelings! She screamed: "Go the hell out of here! Joey, Chandler, help me show these brats the door!"
We grabbed the Warners and tried to throw them out of the door. That resulted in one pie on phoebe's face, one anvil that landed on Chandler's head and than, I was hit with Wakko's mallet. Then I lost my conscious.
