Thank you to everyone for the reviews! It's made me even more nervous to post this though, I was going to drag it out a little but decided to just jump right in.

His stomach lurched, he was sure he was about to be sick, he used all his focus to keep calm and to not throw up.

It was getting easier… he was getting harder to rattle, this was by far the worst he'd ever had to be involved in, taking them down was going to be more than satisfying.

"That one, we could get $200,000 for that one, easy"

Adam listened to the disgusting exchange, his skin crawling, rage bubbling inside of him.

When he was briefed on the case, he was trying to take down a drug ring…

He had been accepted way further into the circle of trust then anyone ever expected though, and what he found out, was that these people were more depraved and sick than they could have ever imagined.

The drug ring was their bread and butter, it was a steady and very lucrative source of income, but what made them the majority of their money... was small children... small children that they would kidnap and then sell off to the highest bidder, no questions asked.

At first Adam had thought it was to people who wanted a child, but it became all too obvious that they didn't care what people wanted the children for, so long as they were paid. And most of them were not going to homes to be loved and nurtured the way a child should be.

Adam was trying to get in far enough to find out where they held the children, at the moment, he was privy to knowing what was going on in a loose sense, but not the details he needed to save any more kids from being taken, or enough to send these bastards away for good.

Kim walked into the bullpen, she had a scan this morning, when the sonographer had asked if she wanted to find out the babies sex she had burst into tears.

She wasn't prepared for that question, when Liana had Zoe she'd had to wait until 18 weeks, but apparently, they could tell at 13 now.

She didn't want to know, she told herself she would wait until Adam was home, it would at least be something they could find out together. Something they could share together.

Kevin gave her the same look he'd been giving her for weeks and she groaned loudly.

"I know okay Kev, I look like shit." she huffed as she sat down at her desk.

"I wasn't going to say that… I was going to say you look unwell"

"Same thing"

"Kim, don't you think you should see a doctor, it's not like you to be sick for this long" Kev said concerned.

"Kev's right, you should go to a doctor" Al smirked, Voight hadn't told him, but when she was placed on desk duty that was all the confirmation that he was right that he needed. "See if he can't find out what's making you so grouchy too" he taunted.

"I hate you both"

"See grouchy" Al laughed as he pointed his banana at her.

"I'm grouchy because my husband is off god knows where probably doing something stupidly dangerous because he thinks he's bulletproof and I'm stuck here, inside these four walls all day because his super sperm decided to knock me up after stopping the pill for all of one minute" Kim yelled and stormed in to the locker room, she'd had enough, this morning was her almost breaking point, this had just tipped her over the edge.

Al sighed loudly, he'd been waiting for that blow up.

Al walked into the locker room, he'd drawn the short straw, no one wanted to see Kim crying, and they knew that's what she would be doing in here. They'd pulled the 'you had experience with a pregnant lady before' line on him.

"Kim?" Al said cautiously, sitting on the bench seat next to her.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell any of you, I was just hoping he'd be home before I had to" Kim said through her tears, which were in actual fact more like sobs. Pregnancy hormones were messing with her and she could be reduced to a puddle over almost anything, it was remarkable she'd managed to hold onto it for this long. At home, she cried over everything.

"You don't have to apologize for that, I suspected as much anyway… How far along are you?"

"13 weeks, I had a scan this morning… There were all these couples in the waiting room excited and there I was sitting alone" Kim paused to wipe her eyes "I could have found out if it was a boy or girl, but I couldn't, not without Adam. I just want him to come home Al, I need him"

"It's ok, don't cry" he said pulling her into a hug.

"You know the kid, he's an over achiever on these things, he'll be home well before the 4 month deadline"

"God I hope so, I hate to think of how much more of a basket case I'm going to be if he's away for another 2 and half months" Kim joked wiping her eyes and forcing a smile.

Kim woke up to a loud banging on the door, she groaned and rolled over looking at the clock on Adams nightstand

"7.15.. ugh seriously, this better be good" she muttered pulling herself out of bed and to the front door. She opened it to be met with a very chirpy Kelsey.

"Morning preggers, now I know you have a bun in that oven of yours I'm no longer going to let you wallow" she said pushing her way into the house. Kim looked around behind her hoping to see Kevin

"Where's Kev?" he hadn't said much yesterday after having found out she was pregnant.

"He's on the phone to some gardener"

"What on earth do you need a gardener for? You have a balcony with a couple of plants" Kim laughed

"Not for us, for you. We pulled up and he had a fit thinking about you trying to cut the grass or trim the hedges"

Kim sighed "He's mad at me for not telling him isn't he?"

Kelsey hesitated and then grimaced "Not really, he's more mad you were still out chasing the bad guys"

"Great"

"It's only cause he cares" Kelsey smiled and then started making a smoothie that didn't look appetizing at all. "Just like I'm making you this because I care, not because it's going to taste good" she laughed and turned the blender on making Kim cover her ears and groan loudly.

"There is a guy coming to do the yard on Friday" Kev said when he walked in the door

"Thanks Kev"

"You know the first thing I'm going to tell him when he gets back? Is that turns out, you're dumber than him" Kev said half laughing.

Kim narrowed her eyes at him "Real nice Atwater"

"He's going to be so pissed at you" he taunted ignoring her looks.

"I'm growing a human for him, he can't be pissed at me" Kim smiled

"Well I'm coming to the rest of your appointments"

"You don't have to Kev"

"Of course I don't Burgess, but I'm going to" Kev said as he walked into the living room "Ruzek's TV needs to have some sport on it, poor thing is starved of anything decent playing on it I bet"

Kim rolled her eyes, not that she would admit it, but it was nice that people knew now, she didn't have to hide out in the house alone.

...

Adam's hands were all over Kim's body, running up the backs of her thighs as he pulled her body closer to him kissing the part of her neck that made her crazy. He pushed his hands up her sides and pulled her dress over her head and threw it away, unclasping her bra and pulling it away from her. He kissed his way down the center of her chest ignoring all the places he knew she wanted him to kiss…

"Ben baby, answer your phone" Adam heard from beside him and he groaned. It was a dream, a bittersweet dream. He opened his eyes and looked over at the half naked blonde lying next to him and felt the same horrible feeling he felt every time he looked at her. Guilt. No matter what his handler tried to tell him, no matter how many times he tried to convince himself that this was helping the greater good. He was cheating on Kim, and it terrified him to think about what that meant for his marriage and what it would do to Kim when she found out. He'd been so close to just going home so many times, but he couldn't he would never be able to live with himself, although he wasn't sure he was going to be able to anyway.

He snatched his phone off the nightstand and answered it.

"What do you want?"

"Jenkins wants you and Taylah to go to lunch with him at Giuseppe's"

"What time?"

"1"

"We'll be there" Adam answered and hung up.

Taylah was a nice enough girl, she was shallow as all fuck and her main priority was how she looked but she wasn't intolerable. She was completely different to Kim, and Adam couldn't decide if that made it easier or harder, it was all just so messed up. Taylah was way too skinny, had DD fake boobs and she wore contacts to make her eyes bluer. She also had platinum blonde hair extensions that creeped him out to no end. She was Jenkins' niece, the closest thing he had to a child. She was the apple of his eye, and she'd taken a liking to him instantly. It was only after he learnt about the kidnapping and child trafficking and he'd become desperate for a way in did he entertain the idea of letting her get close to him. It killed him thinking about Kim, he just hoped that she would understand, hoped that there was a way back from this.

"We?" Taylah asked as she ran her hand up and down Adam's back, goose bumps appearing in their tracks, Adam internally winced and told himself it was only a few more days, a week at the most.

"Your uncle wants us to have lunch at a place called Giuseppe's?"

"Oh yeah, I love that place. Almost as much as I love you" She said kissing his neck, she'd started saying stuff like that a couple of days ago and Adam had been ignoring it, he was hoping he'd be out of this place before she asked him to say it back. Even though it would just be another lie, he never wanted to utter those words to any other woman than Kim.

"Must be pretty good huh?" He laughed as he stood up and walked to the bathroom, as much as he hated this it had worked in the cases favor, Adam had spent the last 5 weeks in Florida with Jenkins top men and Taylah. He had learnt most of the auctioning took place here. They were having a party in the next few days on one of Jenkins yachts, it was the first one Adam was going to be at, and keeping his cool was getting a lot harder, the more he knew, the worse it got. He needed out, he couldn't hold it together much longer.

"I'm serious Kyle, if it doesn't happen at this party, I'm made. I won't watch any of the these kids go off with these sick fucks" Adam was shaking he was so angry, his handler had just told him that they needed more evidence, that they needed the party to happen and then at the next one they would get them. Up until this point there had been no opportunity for him to save any of the kids being taken, he knew he wouldn't be able to control himself.

"Look calm down, you have to listen to me" Kyle reasoned.

"No, I'm serious, you don't make it happen, you're whole fucking case is going to be blown" Adam said looking over his shoulder. "I can't keep doing this to my wife either, I just can't"

"Alright, I'll make it happen. Does the girl know anything?"

"Nah, she thinks it's drugs"

It made Taylah just that little more tolerable, he didn't think he could have pulled the relationship off if she knew what her uncle was really into.

A/N - I know, I know! It's horrible, but if there is ever a forgivable circumstance for it, it has to be this one, right? - I'm thinking I might have to do some 'fluff' flashbacks throughout the fallout, to get our burzek hearts through. lol

Don't hate me!