The Letter
The Letter
Chapter 2 – From Danny
Danny started writing so many letters in response to Lindsay's letter. He knew that the letter he received from Lindsay could not go unchallenged, but he needed to be in the right frame of mind when he wrote his reply. The tone of his letters varied depending on his mood. At times he only wanted to hurt her as much as she hurt him. It would have been so easy to send a letter saying, "I never made any promises to you about fidelity or a future together," and "I can't say that I love you; I don't say what I don't feel, but I cared for you and I never did anything out of bad motives." Instead, the letter he decided to send said:
Lindsay,
I've read your letter many times. If your intention was to hurt me the way I hurt you, then you've done a great job. After all the time we spent together and all that we shared, I don't understand how you could doubt what we had. I can't believe that you now doubt everything we meant to each other. I wanted you to be happy and we were happy together. We were good together. I made a mistake. One mistake which I will always regret. You've told me that you didn't want an explanation because it wouldn't matter in the end. I think it does matter. It matters if that mistake causes you to doubt yourself. It matters if it causes you to lose the trust that you just started to build in humanity – in love. It matters. We matter.
You had every right to walk away, but I wish you had given me the chance to mend what we had. You exercised that right and I understand why. I don't understand why you want to leave your entire life and all of your friends in New York because of what I did. I am sorry for what I did and I am sorry that I hurt you. I am sorry that you feel as if I asked you out with the intention of hurting you. I did not intend for us to end this way. Do you know how deeply your tears are etched into my conscience? Despite what you've heard, cheating is not my style. Although I'm sure my transgression doesn't help my case, please don't take this isolated event (and it was only one time) as validation of office rumors.
Knowing that you won't be in my life kills me.
You certainly deserve better than the way we ended, but I gave all I had to give while we were together. I'm sorry if that wasn't enough.
Love always,
Danny
