Meredith was stirred awake before the alarm by a pair of strong arms encircling her waist

Meredith was stirred awake before the alarm by a pair of strong arms encircling her waist. She opened her eyes slowly and saw the man sleeping contently next to her, a small smile tugging at his lips. She felt guilt wash over her as she laid there in his arms. She shouldn't feel guilty about sleeping with another man, but she was regretting bringing him home. She should be able to be healthy, to move on, but she couldn't. Seven years without him, temporarily filling the void he left night after night, wasn't helping her heal. If anything…it was making her worse. She couldn't trust anyone anymore. Derek broke her completely when he left. She was a shell of the bright and lively girl he had known at Dartmouth.

"Come on Mer! It'll be fun! I promise," her room mate Charlotte whined.

Meredith rarely went out. She was here to learn to become a doctor, not to go out and party. That's what college was for and she utilized it. She tamed her ways since then, even the meaningless one night stands.

"Charli, we've been through this," she groaned.

"Right. The whole I'm here to learn bit. Meredith, it's bullshit. You need to go out and have fun once in a while. When was the last time you went out?"

Meredith sat and tried to remember, but she couldn't.

"It wasn't a rhetorical question," she stood with her hands on her hips.

"I don't remember," she whispered.

"Exactly! Let's go, you're coming with me," Charlotte grabbed her textbook and closed it before grabbing her arm and pulling her off the couch.

"Seriously?!"

"Seriously. You need a night off Mer, you're running yourself ragged."

"I have a test on Thursday!"

"In what?"

"Biochem."

"Oh shit. Well…we're going out anyway. You need this alright?"

"Fine but if I fail that exam, it's on you," she giggled.

They headed to one of the frats and soon Meredith wasn't thinking about school and what the functions of carbohydrates were. She was thinking about how porny everyone was beginning to look thanks to the tequila she was tossing back. She knew this wasn't something she needed right now, she needed to find her room mate so she could go back to her dorm.

"Charli!" She began opening random bedroom doors, ignoring couples in the throes.

"Mer? Meredith?" She heard a moan from the bed.

"Sorry…can we uh, go home?" She felt uncomfortable walking in on her friend having sex, but it wasn't the first time she had done it.

"Kinda busy Mer. Give me an hour and we'll leave, okay?"

"Fine," she groaned and shut the door. She turned to walk down the hall but instead, collided with a hard body.

"Shit I'm sorry. Are you alright?" She felt strong arms steady her and she lifted her gaze to the stranger. She felt her heart skip a beat when their eyes met. He was gorgeous, had perfect hair and cerulean colored eyes.

"Uhhh…I'm…fine," she stammered. Great, now she completely embarrassed herself in front of a hot guy.

"Are you sure? You seem…not fine."

"I just walked in on my room mate having sex," she grimaced.

He chuckled.

"What?! It wasn't funny!" She giggled.

"I know, but I've had that happen to me more times than I care to remember," he said with a grin.

"Hmm our room mates should meet."

"I'm trying to find him, but no luck."

"Well don't open that door," she laughed, "That's where my friend is."

They soon heard a loud moan from the room. They laughed for a minute before Meredith put her head to the door.

"Your friend's name wouldn't happen to be Mark…would it?"

His face paled before he started to laugh.

"Of course that would be him. Mark sleeps with everyone."

"Charlotte does too," she shook her head before giggling.

"What's so funny?"

"Knowing Charli…I'm never getting home before my class tomorrow."

"What's your major?"

"Oh no, I'm a med student."

"Seriously?! Me too, what year?"

"First year," she said with a grin. Cute boy was a med student too, this could be beneficial. Study and have someone gorgeous to look at.

He cocked his head and grinned at her, "First year huh? Those were some great times," he said sarcastically.

"Well then hot shot, what year are you?"

"Third year. I just started my clerkships."

"Good to see that it's possible to survive the first 2 years," she giggled.

"Oh yes. I could, ya know…help if you'd like."

"That'd be great," she breathed a sigh of relief.

"I look forward to it," he grinned.

"Umm well…I should probably get the bus back to my dorm. I have a huge biochem exam coming up."

"Do you want a ride? I mean it'd be stupid for you to get the bus when I have my car here. I was the designated driver anyways."

"Would you…do you mind?"

He shook his head.

"It isn't a problem. Mark can fend for himself," he chuckled lightly.

"Yeah Charli has the keys. And I'm pretty sure if I got pulled over I'd be in deep shit," she giggled. She started to walk down the stairs, but she felt his arm on her shoulder, turning her around.

"What's your name? We just spent all this time talking and I still have no idea what your name is."

"Oh…right…" she stuck out her hand, "Meredith."

He grinned at her before taking her hand, "Derek."

She felt the blush creeping up as his hand lingered in hers. He didn't release it, instead he laced their fingers and brought their entwined hands to their sides.

"Come on let's get you home. Maybe I'll even help you study for your exam," he winked. She giggled at him before walking down the stairs and leaving the party.

Meredith felt tears pooling in her eyes as the memory faded. She wished she could go back to what they were before they got too busy with their schooling. Meredith didn't blame Derek for leaving, everyone else left her. Her father left, he left, and then her mother died. She was all alone, well, except for Izzie and George who lived with her.

She felt the bed shift and she quickly wiped her eyes. She didn't need Jamie to see her this vulnerable. She soon felt his breath against the back of her neck before he began kissing her. Meredith instinctively moved her head so he could get better access to her neck. She let out a soft moan before rolling over to face him.

"Good morning," he said with a smile. He leaned over and kissed her lightly.

"Morning," she returned his smile. She felt butterflies in her stomach, which was something she hadn't experienced in years. Maybe Jamie could help her heal, maybe Jamie was her fresh start.

You sit there in your heartache

Waiting on some beautiful boy

To save you from your old ways