I do not own Blindspot or its characters.


Six weeks later

This day had just gone from bad to worse. Jane felt her footsteps falter as she approached the elevator in the lobby of the NYO and saw Sarah Weller standing there with Sawyer. She was just wondering if she could slip past them unnoticed and take the stairs when Sarah looked over and saw her, her face sporting the same comically dismayed expression Jane was sure she was now wearing as well. Though in her case, the dismay had less to do with Sarah's presence and everything to do with the steaming cup of coffee in her hand. Her stomach had been less than appreciative of the smell of that beverage of late.

As it had of most things she put in it these days. At least in the mornings. This was the strangest stomach flu that she'd ever had. Not that she had much practice being sick. She was generally healthy as . . . well, as a horse, which made it so puzzling that she had come down with this while everyone else was perfectly fine. Or maybe they were hiding their illness like she had been doing. Though unlike her, they would have little reason to need to do so. She, on the other hand, couldn't afford to show any weakness in front of her team. Or her handlers, she supposed she should say. They were hardly a cohesive unit any longer.

"Jane," Sarah greeted coolly as the woman approached. Kurt had mentioned that he was working with her again, but she would be lying if she said she hadn't been hoping that she wouldn't run into her on this impromptu visit back East. She didn't know how her brother could stand the sight of her after what she had done.

"Sarah," Jane returned as she halted several feet from where Sarah was standing, taking care not to get too close so the smell of the coffee wouldn't cause her to lose what little breakfast she had been able to choke down. She would definitely be taking a different elevator. From the look on Sarah's face, she would appreciate that consideration anyway. "Kurt didn't mention you were coming to New York."

Not that he would have—to her, at least. Things had been . . . awkward between them since their ill-advised one-night stand. They had ceased sniping at one another—or rather, Kurt had quit and Jane had finally given it up because he wouldn't respond to any of her gibes—but they were more like polite strangers now than coworkers, or former friends, or one-time lovers. She found herself missing the passion of their previous relationship, even if it had been fueled by hate. This new dynamic was almost bloodless and left her feeling strangely . . . unsettled.

"He doesn't know," Sarah replied tightly, jabbing the button for the elevator once more, wishing it would hurry up. Then realizing that even when it arrived, she would be forced to share it with Jane, who was no doubt getting off on the same floor. "I got a long weekend off work, so I decided to fly in and surprise him."

"That's wonderful," Patterson exclaimed, coming up behind them just as the elevator doors opened and beaming as she hugged Sarah before the two of them and Sawyer stepped aboard. "I know he'll be thrilled to see you. Jane, are you coming?"

Jane's stomach lurched at the sight of both of their cups of coffee. If she got into an enclosed space with the two of them right now, it was not going to be pretty. "No thanks. I think I'll wait for the next one." Or take the stairs. Yeah, that was probably safer. Even if that was more exertion than she had the energy for at the moment. Despite going to bed early and sleeping the night through, she had awoken as exhausted as if she had never slept a wink. This flu was really starting to take a toll on her. Maybe she needed to consider seeing a doctor.

"Don't be ridiculous," Sarah said sharply, reaching out a hand to keep the elevator doors from sliding shut. "We're all adults here, and we're going to the same place. We can ride a few floors on the same elevator in peace. Come on."

There seemed to be no help for it, so after one last desperate attempt to think of a reasonable excuse, Jane stepped aboard. Bile rose in her throat the moment the doors closed, and she concentrated on breathing as shallowly as possible as the elevator rose with agonizing slowness toward their floor, doing her best to focus on Patterson's conversation with Sarah to distract herself from her increasing nausea, but by the time the elevator reached their floor, she knew she was fighting a losing battle.

"Jane?" Patterson asked in concern as she glanced over and saw the white, set expression on the other woman's face. "Are you oka—"

She never got a chance to finish her question, because the moment the elevator doors started to slide open, Jane brushed past her and bolted through them, nearly knocking down a man who was waiting to get on and racing for the bathroom that was thankfully located close by.

Patterson exchanged glances with Sarah, and both of them hurried after her. "Mom?" Sawyer asked in alarm as he raced to keep up with them. "What's wrong with her?"

"I don't know, sweetie," Sarah said, bending down and tousling his hair reassuringly, "but I'm sure it's nothing serious. Agent Patterson and I are going to go check on her, all right?" Patterson had already gone ahead, in fact. "You wait right here. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Jane felt her humiliation was complete as she felt Patterson brush her hair back from her face as she leaned over the nearest toilet and lost the meager contents of her stomach, retching until there was nothing left to come up. She was just beginning to feel that she could sit up when Sarah approached, cup of coffee still in hand, and the whole process began all over again.

"Jane?" Patterson rubbed her back gently as the heaving slowed but Jane didn't raise her head. "Do you want me to go get Dr. Borden?"

"No," Jane managed to choke out. "It's just . . . coffee. The smell makes me sick."

Patterson's and Sarah's eyes widened and the look that passed between them defied description before Sarah hurried over to the sink to dispose of her coffee, dumping the cup Patterson had left sitting there as well and throwing both in the trash. Jane was sitting up when she returned and her heart went out to the other woman at the misery on her face. She knew exactly how she felt. "How far along are you?"

"Far along?" Jane frowned, not understanding. "Oh, you mean how long have I had this flu? I've been fighting it for a week or so, I guess, mostly in the mornings, but it comes and goes. I wish it would just go," she added mournfully. Sarah and Patterson exchanged another meaningful look and her frown deepened. "What?"

"Jane, sweetie . . . the symptoms you're describing aren't typical of the flu," Sarah said gently. Hadn't her mother taught her anything? "It sounds to me as if . . ." She paused and looked over at Patterson, hoping the other woman would take the lead on this since she knew Jane better, but the blonde simply shook her head, motioning for her to continue. "Is it possible that you're . . . pregnant?"

Pregnant? A laugh bubbled up in Jane's throat at the absurdity of the notion, sure Sarah was joking, but it died before she could ever utter it as she registered the serious expression on both women's faces. "What? No. No!" she repeated with more force, as if she could make the problem go away with the vehemence of her denial. Not that there was such a problem; of course there wasn't. It was impossible. But almost as soon as she thought that, her mind went back to her night with Kurt and she realized . . .

The two of them hadn't used protection. Had been so caught up in one another, in the moment, that neither of them had even thought of it.

"No," she repeated again more weakly as the truth began to dawn on her. "No." Her last word was almost inaudible, even to her own ears, but she clung to the increasingly slim possibility that they could be mistaken, and her voice strengthened. "But it could . . . it could be the flu, right? Maybe some weird version of it? With symptoms that mimic . . ." She couldn't bring herself to utter the word pregnancy. Saying it out loud would make it real, and while deep down she knew the truth, she wasn't ready to acknowledge it yet. Wasn't ready to face the fact that there was a tiny life growing inside of her now, a part of her and of Kurt that would link them together irrevocably. "I mean . . . it's possible, right? This could all just be a . . ."

A mistake, she started to say, but the words died on her lips. Because no matter how much their actions that night had been so, she would never call her unborn child that. Would never even think it. She crossed her arms over her middle in an unconscious gesture of protection as she waited for their response.

She had never heard of such a thing, but Patterson smiled reassuringly at Jane as she stood, sensing she needed to cling to that illusion for just a little while longer. "Sure, Jane. I suppose that's possible. I could . . . if you'd like, you can come back to my lab, and I can run a blood test to tell for certain. I should be able to get the results back fairly quickly."

She wouldn't like, but she supposed she couldn't afford to bury her head in the sand. After all, she certainly couldn't run from the problem, and if she really was . . . pregnant, in nine months, it would arrive no matter what she did. Unless she had an abortion.

"Would you like me to come along?" Sarah asked, surprised to hear herself making the offer and even more so to realize that every trace of her anger had been replaced by genuine concern for Jane's well-being. She knew how overwhelming news like this could be under normal circumstances, and judging from Jane's reaction when she broached the subject, it wasn't an entirely welcome possibility.

It didn't appear to be even a remotely welcome possibility. She had seen the flash of fear in Jane's eyes when her suggestion registered, and she couldn't help wondering what kind of man she was with that would inspire such a reaction to what should be joyous news. Her ex had turned out to be a dud in the boyfriend department, but if he had one redeeming quality, it was that he had been supportive of her during her pregnancy and loved Sawyer more than life itself.

Kurt's sister was probably the last person she should be accepting moral support from at this moment but Jane nodded to her gratefully as she rose to follow Patterson. After all, she had no one else in the world who cared about her—certainly no one else who had been through this already and could give her some guidance. She wasn't about to apologize for taking that when it was offered.

Jane sighed as the realities of the situation began to intrude on her. She was potentially pregnant by a man whom she was not and never would be in a relationship with and who had every reason in the world to despise her, a man whose career could—and probably would—take a huge hit if the truth got out. A man who had already made it clear to her that he was unlikely to ever choose to have kids, no matter how much he might want them.

And she . . . Well, to say nothing in her upbringing prepared her to be a candidate for mother of the year was a huge understatement. She knew how to fight, how to shoot, how to kill—not how to rear a child with the love and nurturing it deserved to grow up to be a well-adjusted human being. Terminating the pregnancy would probably be for the best, but she was surprised to discover how much the idea pained her, even though she had only learned of it moments before. Even though she didn't have proof positive yet that she was pregnant.

But she knew. Deep down, she knew, and she was already finding the idea of having a little someone she could come home to every night and whom she could love—and be loved by—unconditionally, nearly irresistible. The timing couldn't be worse, she knew, with the dangers she faced every day in this job, especially now that she was a triple agent in Shepherd's organization, but even though it was undoubtedly selfish, she couldn't deny that she wanted this baby regardless. Wanted this piece of herself and Kurt that no one could ever take away from her.

Kurt. Jane's breath caught in her throat as she realized for the first time that she was going to have to face him and tell him of the unintended consequences of what they had done. What his reaction would be she couldn't even fathom, but she was all but certain they wouldn't see eye-to-eye on the subject. Not that she could blame him for that. She would just have to reassure him that she was more than willing to raise this baby on her own if need be, that she would keep her word to him to never divulge what they had done to another living soul.

"Mom?" Sawyer asked as they exited the bathroom. "Is she okay? Are we going to see Uncle Kurt now?"

"Actually, Sawyer, your uncle is in an early-morning meeting with his boss this morning," Patterson told him before Sarah could speak. "So you and your mom are going to come hang out in my lab for a bit while we try to help Jane, if that's okay with you."

Pellington was back in town? Terrific, Jane thought sourly as Sawyer shrugged his agreement, and the four of them fortunately made it to Patterson's office without encountering Reade or Zapata. The last thing she needed was one of them getting wind of this before she found a way to pull Kurt aside and tell him what was going on. A feat that was going to be exponentially more difficult with his sister and nephew here to visit him. Hopefully, she would be able to convince Patterson to keep it quiet until she was able to break the news to him. Preferably after Pellington left once more.

Sawyer settled himself in a corner with a video game, and once Patterson had drawn Jane's blood and put it into one of her machines for testing, the three of them settled into chairs nearby to wait. "So, Jane," she said, hoping she wasn't overstepping her bounds by broaching this subject but too curious not to try, "I have to admit, this is quite a surprise. I didn't know you were seeing anyone." Didn't know when she found the time with her frequent nightly meetings with Roman. Or maybe those meetings were more . . . friendly than Jane had let on.

"Oh, um . . ." Jane blushed as she floundered for a response to Patterson's implied question. She should have been expecting this, as it was the most natural thing in the world for people who knew her to wonder, but somehow it caught her off-guard. "I, um . . . we . . . well, that is . . . you see . . ." She took a deep breath. "It's complicated," she said finally. The understatement of the century, but the only thing she could tell them at this point without potentially giving too much away.

Sarah smiled sympathetically. "Isn't it always." She studied Jane closely, noticing the faint shadows under her eyes. "You've been tired a lot lately, haven't you?"

It was more a statement than a question, but Jane nodded anyway. Though that had as much to do with her nightmares—which thankfully hadn't woken her last night—as her potential current condition. Or she supposed at this point, she might as well just give up the pretense and call it what it was. She was pregnant.

"Any other symptoms of pregnancy?" Sarah wanted to know. She expounded on a few at Jane's blank look, and Jane's cheeks burned as she confirmed several of them. "Well," she said as she leaned back in her chair, "the test results will tell the tale for sure, but there's no doubt in my mind that you are pregnant."

"But the test results will tell you how far along you are," Patterson supplied helpfully, smiling at Jane to soften the blow of that news but relieved to see that she had apparently come to terms with it.

No need for that, Jane thought. She knew exactly how far along she was. Not that she would admit that to the two of them. "You can tell that from a test?" she asked in disbelief.

"It has to do with the levels of the hormone hCG in your blood," Sarah told her. "It typically doubles every three days in the first trimester of pregnancy, so by measuring the levels in your blood, it will give a pretty good indication of how far along you are. But you'll want to make an appointment with your OB/GYN as soon as possible."

Jane's face told her she didn't have one of those and Sarah was just opening her mouth to make a recommendation when Sawyer interrupted them. "Mom?" he asked, and she was startled to see he had come up beside her and had been listening to them. "Miss Jane's pregnant?"

"That's right, honey." Sarah tousled his hair affectionately. "She has a baby growing in her tummy and in about nine months when it gets big enough, it will come into the world and join us."

If she lived that long, Jane thought dryly. If Shepherd's organization didn't find her out as a traitor and kill her, Kurt might just want to when he learned what was in store for him. Of course, he was under no obligation to be in the baby's life, she reminded herself. Though for their child's sake, she hoped he would choose to do so. She hadn't been lying when she told him she thought he'd make a great dad.

Sawyer nodded, his brow furrowing, but before he could ask any more questions, the machine beeped, signaling the test was complete, and Sarah and Jane followed Patterson over to her computer to get the results.

"Well, Jane," Patterson said when she'd finished doing the math, "you're definitely pregnant. About six weeks, by my calculations. Congratulations." She hugged her warmly, and Sarah followed suit.

"Thanks," Jane said weakly. She'd known that, of course, but still to hear Patterson confirm it . . . She looked from her to Sarah. "Umm . . . I would appreciate it if you would let me tell Kurt and the others about this. I'll do it soon; I promise," she added, mostly for Patterson's benefit.

"Of course," both of them chorused, and just in the nick of time, too; the words had no sooner left their mouths than Reade stuck his head in the door.

"Hey, Patterson, have you seen—Oh, hey, Sarah," he greeted. "Kurt didn't mention that you were in town."

"He doesn't know," Sarah told him. "We decided to surprise him, but he was in a meeting when we arrived, so we've just been hanging out here with Patterson and Jane."

"He wrapped that up about fifteen minutes ago," Reade told her. "If you want to come with me, I'll take you to him. And Jane, he's been looking for you."

Fantastic. Jane trailed behind Reade and the Wellers, and Patterson fell into step beside her. "It's going to be okay," she whispered to her. "Weller will support your decision; you'll see."

Jane glanced at her, startled, before realizing she was talking about the professional ramifications of her pregnancy rather than the personal ones. She had no idea of the dual meaning behind her words. Jane only hoped they would prove to be prophetic.

Kurt was standing with Pellington and Nas and Zapata when they entered the bullpen and Jane watched his face light up as he spotted Sarah and Sawyer, relieved to have time to observe him without being the focus of his attention. It felt incredibly different looking at him now knowing he was the father of her unborn baby—the child he didn't yet know she was carrying—than it had just twenty-four hours ago. She wouldn't have wished this on them, but at the same time, she wouldn't trade it for the world.

"I hope you weren't too bored waiting all this time," Kurt said to Sarah once the excitement had died down. "Of course, if I had known you were coming . . ."

She smiled at the gentle teasing in his voice. "I wasn't bored at all. I've been having a great time hanging out with Agent Patterson and Jane."

Kurt glanced over at Jane, surprised by his sister's words, and she felt color flood her cheeks as their eyes met. "Well, I hope she wasn't too much trouble," he joked. "Thanks for keeping her occupied for me."

She should be the one thanking him. Sarah had been a godsend. "No problem," she replied.

"Miss Jane?" Sawyer spoke up, still plagued by the questions he hadn't got the chance to ask. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, Sawyer," Jane said, bending down to his level and missing Sarah's frantic head shake no. "What is it?"

"How did the baby get in your tummy?" Sawyer asked innocently. "And how will it get out when it's big enough?"

Jane froze. For the span of several heartbeats, she couldn't move, couldn't breathe—and the silence that fell over the group was equally deafening. And then all hell broke loose.

Kurt stiffened, feeling as if he'd been sucker punched, certain Sawyer must have misunderstood. Jane couldn't be pregnant, not now, not so soon after . . . Oh, god. His eyes closed briefly as realization swept over him. He hadn't used a condom that night, not even once. Had never even thought of it. He locked his eyes on Jane, willing her to look at him, to give him some sign if his suspicions were correct, but she kept her gaze averted. Which he supposed was confirmation enough in and of itself.

Pellington and Nas exchanged glances, Nas's inscrutable, Pellington's openly disdainful. Reade's mouth fell open slightly as he glanced from Jane to Sarah to Patterson, reading the truth in their eyes. Sawyer returned to Sarah's side, confused by everyone's sudden silence. She gave him a reassuring smile as she leaned down to whisper, "We'll talk about this at home, kiddo."

Zapata was the first of those who hadn't known to recover her voice. "You're pregnant?" she demanded in a tone that sounded as if the deed was right up there with mass murder in her book. Which it probably was. "And you didn't tell us?"

Jane straightened up slowly, keeping her gaze on Sarah and Patterson. She could feel Kurt's eyes on her, but she didn't dare look in his direction. "I am," she confirmed. "But I wasn't keeping it from you. I only just found out a little while ago myself. I . . . I've been bothered by the smell of food lately and nauseated in the mornings, but I had no idea that . . . I thought I just had the flu."

"The flu?" Zapata demanded scornfully. "Those are classic signs of morning sickness. What rock did you live under before you crawled out of that bag? Or were you raised by wolves?"

Pretty much. Actually, come to think of it, being raised by wolves might have been a step up from her upbringing. Not that Zapata knew anything about that. Or any of the team, for that matter. They knew she had recovered some of her memories, but they no longer cared enough to ask what they were about.

"You said you just found out this morning?" Reade asked, seeing Sarah's eyes flash at Zapata's insensitivity and hoping to avert a catfight between those two. "How far along are you?"

Jane closed her eyes as her breath caught in her throat. Talk about being put on the spot. There was no way she could dodge that question, but once she answered it, Kurt would know he had to be the father. This wasn't how she had wanted him to find out, not at all.

"According to the blood test I ran, she's about six weeks," Patterson replied, seeing Jane apparently too overwhelmed to respond.

"So who's the father?" Zapata wanted to know. "Oh, wait, let me guess. Roman. Tell me, does he know he's going to be a daddy yet? Is he overjoyed, or does he think it's a mistake too and want you to get rid of it?"

Jane took a deep breath, determined not to let Zapata's taunts get to her. She understood the other woman was still hurting, but so was she. But nothing good would come of attempting to justify herself. "Roman will support me in whatever decision I make," she said evenly and saw Kurt stiffen out of the corner of her eye. And he would. As a friend. Even if he would no doubt disapprove of it.

Zapata snorted. "You do realize the odds are good he'll be having to do that from behind bars, right? So what's your plan here, Jane? Have the kid and haul it up to prison on visiting days to see its daddy through the glass? God, what is it with you and these guys? You say you want us to trust you, but how are we ever supposed to do that when you keep pulling stunts like this? First Oscar, now Roman. But at least the first one apparently had the good sense to use protection. This one must be a real dumbass."

"Zapata, stop!" Kurt barked, finding his voice at last, seeing Reade restrain his sister as Sarah took a furious step forward. "That's enough. You owe Jane an apology." And him, though he could hardly refute anything she'd said on that score. He was a dumbass.

Zapata opened her mouth to protest, but the furious glare Kurt drilled her with convinced her discretion was the better part of valor. "I'm sorry," she said stiffly.

"It's okay, Zapata," Jane assured her. "I understand." Kurt had told her once that it took time to move on from losing a loved one, and experience was proving to be a rather painful teacher of that. No one stopped to consider that she was hurting too. That not only had she lost everyone she had been privileged to call friends, she had lost Mayfair too. She might not have known her as long or as well as them, but she had cared. She did care.

She just didn't know what else she could do to show them that.

"There's something I need to say in Jane's defense," Kurt continued, and had the satisfaction of finally seeing Jane's eyes fly up to meet his, her expression confirming that he was right. Not that he'd had any doubts, though it irked him that she had fostered, rather than corrected, Zapata's mistaken assumption. He was the only man that baby would ever be calling daddy.

"Kurt—" Jane said softly, trying to communicate without words that he didn't need to do this. That he shouldn't throw away the career he loved, the position he so justly deserved, just to defend her honor without considering all the ramifications of it carefully.

"It's okay, Jane," he assured her with a lopsided smile. "I need to do this. I want to. Trust me." He turned back to the group, who were now watching him with a mixture of shock and suspicion—and in his sister's case, hope—and took a deep breath. "Roman isn't this baby's father."

"And how do you know that, Assistant Director Weller?" Pellington demanded. As if he didn't already know.

"Because it's mine." Kurt walked over to Jane and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, feeling her tremble beneath his touch and press back into him ever so slightly. He met Pellington's gaze squarely. "I'm the baby's father."