Title: Repentance Against Sin
Chapter 2: Breaking Point

Author: Harper Hisoka
Warning: Shonen ai, yaoi, rape, incest (between cousins)

Series: Gravitation
Pairing: Tohma x Suguru

Summary: Suguru's father was arrested for attempted rape, and just when things were settling down, his mother finds another boyfriend. But just who is this new "boyfriend"? Who can Suguru turn to in his time of need? AU because Tohma is 25, Suguru is 19, and the timeline was modified a bit for my story. Also, Tohma doesn't quite have that obsession with Yuki as he did in the manga/anime.


Opening the door slowly, he found his cousin sitting at his desk, different papers stacked gently around his desk. Looking around for a moment, nothing that Tohma was alone; he gently walked in, shutting the door with a soft "click" behind him.

"Suguru, really, you don't have to knock. I know it's you, but, if you're referring to that one time with the press, I really didn't schedule that one. Barging in seems to be a personal favorite for certain curious reporters. I never plan conferences in the morning unless I have to, you know." Giving Suguru his classic warm smile, he motioned for his cousin to make himself more comfortable.

The morning conference Suguru had barged in on was now an inside joke between them, and this was one joke that that Suguru didn't mind sharing with his beloved (yet distant) cousin.

Suguru took a moment to look around his cousin's office. Correction – his cousin's insanely clean office. Even Suguru's walk-in closet wasn't this orderly. Of course, it could have something to do with the personal maid that Tohma had hired to clean his office three times a day.

It was expected that certain advantages come with being the head of NG Studios, and having the an office with the biggest view of the city, a full length couch, widescreen TV, full stereo deck and desk included, just happened to be some of them.

"Suguru, please, have a seat. I'll be with you in just a second. I have some business to take care of, but I assure you, it won't take me long."

"You know, if this is a bad time, Tohma, I can come back –"

Tohma sighed, slightly amused by his cousins comment. "That won't be necessary, Suguru. I just have some documents to look over for my meeting this afternoon."

Suguru smiled at his cousin. Tohma had always made time for Suguru, no matter how much business he had to do. Suguru thought this over and smiled.

'Not many people can understand you so well like I can, Tohma.'

"Tohma, when I was walking to work this morning, Hiro asked me an interesting question. He asked me if I loved you." Suguru was still standing in the middle of the room, staring at Tohma, waiting to see how his cousin would reply to his statement.

Tohma's face looked thoughtful for a moment, before relaxing into a comfortable smile.

"And what did you tell him?"

"I asked what would make him think that and why he would, seeing as how we tend to be family. He never answered me, you know. I think... No, I know he likes me and more then just as a friend, too. I really don't like him that way, Tohma. You know that, but... I'm afraid of telling him or anyone else about us. It will be the same thing all over again. First they find out that I like you, then they will start yelling about how wrong it is, how you're my cousin and family shouldn't marry family. This will, of course, be followed closely by the loud, never-ending arguments and, as father put it, the "extensive but necessary sexual preference corrective sessions". He would always say, "Tohma should be nothing but your cousin, you sick..." Um, well... you get the idea. He was never a... Anyways, I wish Hiro wouldn't hit on me like that. It's very unnerving sometimes. I have to play in the same bad with him, after all. I bet the reporters would have a field day if they found out that Hiro and I were having an affair. Add that to the fact that the whole world already knows about Shuichi and Yuki, and –"

"Is that really so bad, Suguru? Hiro means well, you know that."

Going into a fit of playful anger, he started to tell off his cousin.

"What, so now you don't care about me? Do you honestly think that I could love Hiro-kun? Well fine, if that's how you want it, then maybe I'll just go find Hiro-kun right now and tell him that I don't love you, that I love him and always have. Would that make you happy?"

Tohma sighed, shaking his head lightly. "You know how cute I think you get when you're angry, don't you, Suguru?"

Smiling, Suguru kept his playfully puffy attitude. "Yeah, so what if I know that? Maybe I just want to make you jealous or something, ever think of that?"

"Now who's changing the subject, huh?"

Suguru laughed. Tohma could be very charming and cute when he wanted to be. Unfortunately, Suguru had other things on his mind as well. Suguru's smile suddenly dropped from his face. His playful attitude slowly slipped away, only to be replaced by a more serious, sadden look. There was something that Suguru came here specifically to tell his cousin, something that had been weighing on his mind for a while.

"Tohma, Hiro isn't the only person that I'm starting to become uncomfortable around. It's my mom's new boyfriend. I just don't trust him, Tohma. Something is... wrong... Things are all wrong..."

"Suguru?"

"Tohma... I..."

'How can Tohma possibly understand what I want to tell him? I've been taken by force, and I bet Tohma wouldn't ever look at me the same way again. After everything I've been though, I can't see why Tohma-kun would want to stay with me. I know I'm not worthy of him. Not any more.'

'This is not like Suguru at all' Tohma thought. 'What could his mom's new boyfriend have against him? If only I knew what was going on between them...' Getting up from his desk, he walked over to his younger cousin. Suguru wasn't looking at him, instead seeming lost in thought, staring absently towards the floor.

"What's wrong, Suguru? What have you been hiding from me?"

Suguru turned towards his cousin, his face hiding an unknown determination, and for a brief moment, Suguru seemed to be challenging Tohma to dare question him further about his father, his concentration only broken by a sudden rush of tears that had seemly come out of nowhere. The morning had started out pretty well for Suguru too. After all, Suguru's mom's boyfriend hadn't tried anything else since those two nights ago, or even the other nights before that...

Tohma was still sitting behind his desk, but still watching his cousin carefully. The emotions that played on his face weren't natural for him: sorrow, pain, hurt... embarrassment? 'Suguru, why won't you reveal to me what is bothering you most? Why do you keep your pain buried so deeply within your heart?'

He must have lost himself in thought; for the next thing he knew, Suguru had bolted out of his office, pausing only briefly enough to open the door before continuing his run, his tears the only trail left behind.

Tohma could only shake his head sadly at his cousin's behavior.

"Why won't you trust me, Suguru? Why don't you trust me enough to let me know what's going on in your life? Could you mom's boyfriend really be just like you real father? I'm going to let you tell me, Suguru. I'm trusting that you will find the strength enough to do it too. If he is hurting you, though, I won't hold back – I'll protect you with everything I have. I wish you knew; I love you too much to let anyone even think of hurting you. If only you weren't so innocent, Suguru, then maybe people like your father would leave you alone."

With that, Tohma had turned back to his work. To be honest, the work was really starting piling up, but he couldn't help but worry for his younger cousin. For Tohma, the majority of the day was spent trying to finish his work and attending that afternoon meeting. The key word here, however, was "trying" to work. However much Tohma tried to concentrate, the visions of Suguru's crying face and his sudden rush out of the office had never left his mind once. His only hope: that Suguru would be safe until they could be together once more.

While Tohma's day was spent, more or less as normal as usual – Suguru's day had only started its uniquely downward trend. After rushing out of Tohma's office Suguru had found himself, interestingly enough, in the bathroom that Shindo-san usually runs when upset or depressed. I guess the fact that the location of the bathroom never really warranted any though-traffic during the usual busy day for a studio company helped.

"I guess I can see why this is Shindo-san's bathroom of choice. It seems to be a nice and quiet place to think. Plus it's stocked full of toilet paper."

Not really wanting to think about the current day's trends, Suguru had managed to settle down enough to be able to use some meditative techniques to collect himself to his usual, outward standard.

Managing to completely relax while immersing himself in his meditation, Suguru was now temporarily lost to the outside world, his mind managing to find a peace that, in his heart, he knew that his father and his mom's boyfriend would never be able to find. Suguru had always enjoyed his time spent in meditation, and the mornings before work started seemed to be the perfect time to meditate as well. Another bonus in coming to the studios early was the fact that he didn't have to deal with his mom's boyfriend as well. The time spent at home either consisted of Suguru practicing his keyboarding skills, playing around with different arrangements, or spent hiding from his mom's boyfriend, who happened to insist that Suguru call him "father".

This new revelation seemed to suit Suguru just fine, however, judging from the fact that he and his real father acted so much alike. The only father Suguru knew were no where near the "perfect" families that the television managed to create. It seemed to Suguru that if television shows depicted families at all, most were shown as loving, caring parents, with children that either hated or loved them back. Unless you were watching something based of off a soap opera, families were apparently always a loving, caring, dedicated and tightly-knit group of people that always dealt with problems together, be it internal or external.

It was usual for Suguru to be seen coming into work at six o' clock every morning, but what most people didn't know was that he didn't actually start work until around eleven am. His usual meditation spot was a favorite tree in the park just outside the studios. It just happened to be one of the tallest, bushiest trees in the park, not even losing its leaves to the coming of winter and fall. This time around, however, the bathroom suits him just fine. He was still a bit upset over his last conversation with his beloved, and the thought of what Tohma's face looked like as he ran out of his older cousins office seemed to haunt him even in some of his deeper meditative states.

Fortunately for Suguru, his downward spiral of events never actually occurred until after work in the studios was finished for the day. Shuichi had ended up being in an extremely happy mood the entire day, and Hiro-kun had just gone along with his happy-go-lucky behavior. Even K and their producer, Sakano-san, were in a somewhat relaxed mood today. The chemistry between their group was usually one that inspired various spats throughout the day, but today seemed to flow unnaturally smooth for some reason. Work had even ended later then it usually did, but no one seemed to notice. Usually complaining could be heard starting from five and until the end of work, but it was already eight and no one had even complained once. A reference was made for food around dinner time, but no one really complained.

'Maybe this day won't be so bad after all.' Thought Suguru.

Little did Suguru know, but his troubles were just beginning, and everything started the moment he came home late from the studios. By the time Suguru had gotten home, it was already past eleven o' clock, and someone had been waiting up for him the entire time.

"You normally get home at six, what happened?"

"We have a concert coming up, so we decided to work late today, father."

The man smiled at Suguru; it was his mom's boyfriend. Apparently he had been waiting up for him, sitting in one of the living room recliners. Suguru's "father" just smiled at him, an evil grin playing across his face.

"I'm glad you're finally calling me father, especially now that your mother and I are officially engaged."

"What? When did you two decide that?" A shocked look seemed fixed on Suguru's face. 'Why would mother possibly marry another guy who acted so much like the man she divorced?'

"We are going to announce our engagement to our families this weekend. Hopefully the marriage will take place sometime in late December. We are hoping it will snow for our wedding."

Suguru was still shocked that this man would be his father within a year, and that shock was still very apparent on his face.

"Shocked, huh? Get used to it. Your mother is out right now on business, so we can talk freely here."

Suguru still stared at his father.

"She's in Los Angeles, California. I believe she told you already, but she's on business for the next four days."

After a moment, Suguru managed to settle once more into his normally slightly serious expression. Just thinking about this man becoming his father was angering him, so, taking a couple of calming breaths, and relying on his earlier meditation to keep him calm, he finally found his voice.

"Why would you marry my mother? Do you even love her?"

"Of course I love her, you insolent child. I love her like a business man likes his money. It's you I don't like, but... I have a remedy for that. I may not like you, but I do like your body."

"I will never give myself to you freely."

"But your mother won't be "accidentally" dropping by this evening. She's left me in charge of you until she gets back. I assure you, it's just us tonight."

"How can you say that? You will never have me, and I will do what I can to prevent this marriage! Mother just got divorced, and you're just taking this chance to take advantage of her!"

"So what if I am? I love her, I love her money, but most of all, I love the way she looks. You look just like her, you know that? I'll be willing to bet that your body is just as good as hers."

The man rose from the recliner, moving to meet Suguru face to face.

"Suguru, you are so pretty..." The man forcefully grabbed Suguru by the waist, thrusting him towards his body. Suguru struggled against the unexpected move from his "father". He had not expected this man to make such a bold move on him, even though he hinted at what he wanted, never had he made such a bold move. His father was all talk until now.

'I guess it was only a matter of time before he made his move, then. How could I be so foolish to think that that creep would actually keep his distance!'

"I guess I should have expected this from you, but I never thought you could be so bold in your intentions. Do you know why I had having a father?"

His father laughed, but didn't let his grip on Suguru lessen. "Okay, amuse me. Why do you hate having a father?"

"Because all fathers are good for are rape and beatings!"

Suguru upped his attempts to get lose, but his father wasn't buying it.

The man laughed out loud, apparently amused.

"You won't get away from me tonight."

The next thing Suguru knew, both of his fathers hands were around his waist, pressing him even harder against his father's very apparent arousal.

"I will have you tonight, but you will not be so consenting as I. Don't even try to resist me. It would be a shame if I had to hurt one as pretty as you."

"GET OFF OF ME, YOU PERVERT!" Suguru struggled against his father's grasp, but the grip never let up. Minutes went by, with Suguru's father watching in slight amusement at Suguru's apparently useless struggling.

"I am too strong for you, Suguru. You will be mine tonight. You also won't tell you mother, about this, do you hear me? If you tell her, then I just might be forced to beat her as well as you. We will be a happy family, and you will say that we had a "nice" time this weekend."

Suguru stopped in his attempt for freedom.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because its fun and I don't want to lose my new favorite toys, now do I?"

"So, what if she "accidentally" finds out?"

"Then both of you will get hurt. I want to keep you and your mother as my "play things" for as long as possible. You guys are so fun to be around."

"You wouldn't dare hurt mother!"

"I would if I had to. You know I would."

"You're just like him..."

"Who, your "real father". I like his family ideologies. Me and him are closer then you may think, boy. Hmm... Now, if I recall, he liked to play with you, too, didn't he? He did things to you, things you didn't like, right? I haven't seen him in a long time, the ol' devil. But now matter, I'll be happy to finish what he started. I really do enjoy the thought of you naked, though. Oh, the things we could do! The things we will do."

Suguru didn't want this, he never liked being raped by anyone, but sometimes sacrifices had to be made. Suguru knew that his mother's job required being ready at any time to travel and give business conferences. Looks were a public image Suguru's mother, and if this man beat her, she might lose her job.

"If I give in, do you promise not to hurt my mother? You know how important everyone takes her public image."

"Yes. I won't touch her."

Suguru almost flinched at the answer, knowing what would come next. With an expression of defeat covering his face, and tears in his eyes, he answered his father.

"I'm all yours, as long as you keep your promise about my mother; I will be yours for as long as you want. Whenever you want."

"I knew you would be mine tonight. I always get what I want in the end."

Suguru woke up the next morning in his own bed, alone, sweaty, and sticky from the previous nights activities. It was already eleven o'clock in the morning, but he didn't care. Suguru knew he had to go to the studios today, but after last night... Managing to drag himself out of bed, he proceeded straight to the shower to clean up. His father had just slept on the couch, but Suguru was determined to spend the rest of the night in his own bed, despite the protest coming from his father.

What Suguru really wanted to do was to cry. His emotions wanted to overwhelm him, to break him, but he knew that he couldn't let his emotions go while still in the same house as his father. He would get beaten, raped, tortured until he stopped crying. At least, that's part of what happen to him last night.

Suguru let the shower water rush over his body, cleansing it the best it could.

"I hate you, father." Suguru's voice was barely a whisper as he said it, but the ferocity was still the same. "Why do I have to be yours..."

Holding back more of the tears that were threatening to overtake him, Suguru focused solely on finishing his shower and getting to work. The less time he spent at home, the better.

"I hate myself for what I've done, but can Tohma really protect me from someone like father? No, how could he? If I'm ashamed of myself, then how could Tohma not be as well?"

The morning went without incident well enough. Suguru had managed to finish his shower in no time at all and even had time to enjoy it as well. Suguru dressed himself in his usual pink shirt, vest, and pants. On his way out, Suguru grabbed one of the new "French Toast Pop tarts" for breakfast, and as quietly as he could, made his way out of his house. Once Suguru was a relatively safe distance away, he managed to relax a bit, all the while shoving his pop tart hungrily into his mouth.

In no time at all, Suguru was once again at the famous NG studios to work. Suguru entered the building, looking up at the clock that presented itself in the lobby.

'11:20, huh? Usually I don't get here that fast.' Suguru thought. 'Oh well, at least now I have time to see Tohma before heading to the recording studios for more concert arrangements.'

Suguru walked the rest of the way in silence, not even daring to think about anything at all until he was alone with Tohma. He wasn't sure if Tohma would be able to help him and his mother, but Suguru knew how bad it would look if he suddenly broke down in the middle of the hallway crying.

Suguru now moved more quickly thought the hallways. The raping his father forced onto him was still fresh in his mind. His agreement with his father was hopefully, just temporary.

Making it to Tohma's office in record breaking speed, he quickly knocked on the door, before barging in, tears welling up in his eyes. Surprisingly, Tohma was meeting with their producer, Sakano-san this morning. Usually Tohma never had meetings before noon, but at this point, Suguru didn't care. He needed Tohma's comfort, his gentle embrace, Suguru needed Tohma. Suguru stood at the open doorway, the tears flowing gently down his cheeks. "Tohma!" He cried out, walking towards his beloved.

Seeing the tears streaming down Suguru's face, Tohma took no time at all in getting up from behind his desk.

The two met each others embrace in the middle of the office. As Suguru slid into Tohma's arms, his left knee unexpectedly gave way beneath him; therefore dragging himself and Tohma to the floor. Despite Suguru's previous attempts at trying to hide the slight limp on his left leg from the night before, he had never realized up until now how bad his injuries had been. As the two landed with a hard "thump" on the floor, Suguru had found himself unable to get back up. The pain Suguru should have been feeling from his injuries were now starting to take over his body, both paralyzing and pain growing in intensity every second he lay on the floor.

"Tohma..." Suguru chocked out. "I'm so sorry. I could help myself; I gave in to my father last night..."

Tohma got up to sit beside his younger cousin; wrapping his arms around his small waist and pulling him up to his lap, letting Suguru bury his face in his older cousin's neck.

Suddenly realizing that Sakano-san was also in the room, he pulled Suguru closer as he addressed Bad Luck's producer.

"Please leave, Sakano-san, and don't tell anyone what you just witnessed here. We can talk later, the concert arrangements can wait until next week."

"I... I understand. I will be with Bad Luck if you need anything further."

"Very well, Sakano-san. Oh, and before you leave, if Suguru wants to tell you guys what has happened here, then it's his choice. But you are not to repeat anything you have heard here otherwise. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Seguchi-san. I understand." With that, Sakano-san bowed slightly before heading out the door, making sure to close it firmly behind him.

Tohma watched as Sakano-san left, making sure that they were the only ones left in his office. A sudden grab for his neck by Suguru brought Tohma back into reality. Suguru had his arms wrapped tightly around Tohma's neck, his face buried deep in his arms as he cried.

"Suguru, love, everything will turn out all right, you'll see. As long as I'm here, my love, I will protect you, you have to believe that."

Tohma felt the presence of tears beginning to roll softly down his cheek as he watched his lover cry out into his shoulder, crying out emotions that, no doubt, he had been holding back since the night before.

"Suguru, my little one, what happened to you last night? What are you not telling me?"


A/N: Thanks so much for all your support! Also, remember that I almost always work on reviews alone. So, if you want one of my stories to continue, you have review and let me know it! I tend not to post my stores if no one shows interest (that doesn't mean that I won't write the rest of it, I just might not post it!) Plus, I'm a sucker for reviews. Yep! So, let me know what you think. By the way, it takes time for me to post new chapters, so just be patient!

To My Reviewers:

To Koneko Bombay – Thanks so much! I'm really glad you like my story. Continue to review, ne?

Suguru: Our writer likes it when you guys read and review, okay? So, if you want to see more of me and Tohma (and possibly a rewrite of this chapter) please leave her an e-mail or signed review.

To Kloudy Reignfall – It's funny, I love me too, ne? Hehehe. Thank you, Thank you... bows Curious about Hiro, ne? Well, well, well. What could Hiro's destiny possibly be in my story? Hmm... will he be paired up with someone?

Hiro: YES HE I mean YES I WILL!! I think I deserve to have partner. How else am I supposed to get any action around here? Don't I get paired up with Suguru in this fic?

Me: Sorry Hiro, not in this fic. Didn't you read the beginning? This is a TohmaxSuguru fan fiction.

Hiro: Okay, okay. But I will get some action in this story, right?

Me: Well, if you mean, hitting on Suguru again...

Hiro: Forget it... walks off

To Darklore Wings – Of course I didn't get to the main story yet. Chapter one was a test to see who would want to see me continue my story. I haven't read that fan fiction yet, but I'll look into it!

Tohma: Remember to check out our writer stories! It's of the utmost importance. Jaa ne!

Owari!