A/N Thank-you to everyone for their interest in Serieux, including their reviews, favs and follows. I'd hoped to have this chapter up earlier than this but there were technical difficulties. This isn't beta'ed and I haven't had time to redraft it for the umpteenth time either, so sorry for any boo boos. Customary warning - if you don't appreciate my style of introspection that's cool but you probably won't want to read further and Gibbs fans will probably want to tar and feather me too so consider reading a heroic Gibbs story instead. Just saying you might want to do your BP a favour :)
So the new plan is that I'll be posting the epilogue to this chapter simultaneously to posting the first chapter of the cross over story. If all goes to plan that will be tomorrow, which means that you'll discover the identity of Toby's house guest and learn Tony's mother of all secrets. It's a biggie!
Serieux Part 1
Chapter 2 Rule # Five
Tobias sighed as he pulled up in his driveway. No cases today so they should get their answers tonight. DiNotzo would be turning up soon, no doubt extremely curious about why he'd insisted he come to dinner. Granted their professional relationship had been fairly rocky over the years, twice Fornell had been heading up murder investigations centred upon DiNotzo as the prime suspect.
Honestly, the man was a trouble magnet. Attracted shit like no one he'd ever met with the possible exception of Gibbs, except that Jethro actively went out looking for it. Tony seemed to just attract it, or perhaps it was being in such close proximity to Leroy Jethro Gibbs.
DiNotzo, although Fornell had taken pity on him at Thanksgiving and dragged him home for dinner, was not exactly a close friend and therefore been nonplussed to be invited round for dinner tonight. When pressed for information, Fornell just grinned mysteriously, saying a mutual friend was eager to catch up with him again. He noticed the speculative expression on Tony's face before he tried to make an excuse to get out of coming over.
It was highly apparent to Tobias that the NCIS agent was feeling low, had been for a while. It was after all why he'd invited him over to spend Thanksgiving Dinner with himself and Emily, who'd come home for the holiday.
He'd found Tony alone in the NCIS bull pen at the end of their joint case, having declined to spend what was left of the holiday with the team, sans Bishop and Gibbs. Fornell, figuring that misery loved company had brought Tony back home to share what was bound to be a crappy dinner. It was Emily's first holiday since the death of Diane and it was always going to be an extremely difficult one for his daughter and himself to get through.
Having the NCIS agent with them helped both of them, and he suspected that it also helped Tony too since he would have understood how hard it was for his daughter. He knew that DiNotzo had also lost his own mother when he was young. Being able to help each other had been mutually helpful for everyone.
And since DC was a pretty insular environment, it didn't take much to get tongues wagging, so it wasn't rocket science to figure out why Tony was so glum. Everyone knew that Gibbs was being an absolute prick to DiNotzo, and considering how Gibbs normally treated his team, particularly his 2IC, aka his loyal St Bernard - that was saying something. Fornell knew that even Gibbs' friends and staunchest of supporters, Dr Donald Mallard and Dr Abby Sciuto - who were perpetually blind to Jethro's flaws, had noticed how bad the abuse had become.
They were both trying their damnedest to put a positive spin on it. So the Spin-Twin Doctors' slant was that Gibbs was pushing his baby bird i.e. Tony out of the nest to spread his wings. Apparently he was doing this because it was now time after 15 years for him to grow. Not seemingly 14 years ago or ten years, but 15 years being the 'magic' number for him to go forth and become a momma bird to his own little baby birds.
Okay…okay that was more Sciuto's version than Mallard's but the gist was the same. Ducky's narrative was more focused on tough love but the subtext remained. Gibbs was kicking him to the curb because he needed to spread his wings and fly away and absolutely nothing to do with him getting shot by Daniel Budd and nearly dying.
As theories go it was not a bad one – if you discounted a lot of facts. Salient facts. But that explanation didn't cut it as far as Fornell was concerned – apart from the arbitrary nature of the 15 years. After all it was common knowledge amongst feds that DiNotzo should have been leading his own team years ago. He'd lead the MCRT more than adequately a decade ago back in 2006. So it took Gibbs ten years to realise and it had nothing to do with getting shot?
All that aside though, Tony wasn't some pansy assed, delicate little rookie – he was an extremely experienced agent, who could have handled a professional evaluation from his boss. One where Jethro told him his skills and experience were exemplary and that he was being wasted as his second in charge after such a lot of years.
He would have coped with a recommendation from Gibbs to start looking at higher level positions, it would not have fazed him, nor broken him. The fact that the gunny never gave DiNotzo positive reinforcement – even when he performed superhuman feats, would guarantee that such a discussion, if it had taken place, would have been more than adequate to push him out of the nest.
If Gibbs real agenda had been to stop him wasting his talent, it would have allowed him to leave the MCRT with his head held high, thrilled because Gibbs was proud of him and believed in his ability. Instead, the man was desperately unhappy, questioning his whole life, his sense of self-worth and second guessing his skills, achievements and if he had a purpose or value.
So his low self-esteem was not helped at all by the way Gibbs had sidelined him this year and wasted his skills. It was heartbreaking to see Gibbs was definitely ignoring his own Rule 5 - Don't waste good! When Tony finally left – and he would slink off, his tail between his legs because he knew Gibbs didn't want or need him anymore, he would be a shadow of the brashly confident young cop Gibbs had snatched away from the Baltimore PD 15 years ago.
Talk about using him up and spitting him out when he'd reached his use by date. Fornell was less than impressed with Gibbs behaviour.
Tobias was certain Tony felt incredible guilt that Gibbs got shot and almost died, feeling he'd failed his team leader because he hadn't prevented it. That was balderdash, complete and utter drivel. The truth was that Jethro could always be sucker punched by a pretty female or a cute/ pathetic kid with a sob story and once on a mission to save them, he wasn't going to listen to any of his team. It was a miracle this hadn't happened before this.
So if Jethro was trying to force him to leave, and that seemed to be beyond doubt, then it seemed to Tobias that his real motivation was far less altruistic and far more selfish than worrying that Tony was wasting his talent. He strongly suspected that the former Marine actually was setting him up to fail by destroying his faith in himself, although he wasn't sure if it was a conscious decision or subconscious.
Regardless, it went beyond the pale for him to treat a loyal partner like that, especially someone who'd had his back for 15 years. Fifteen Gibbs years which in his opinion were much longer than normal years. He demanded that his team be available and reachable 24/7, that work took precedent over any home life, that they work interminable hours and often skipped meal, that they unquestioningly observed all of his rules, while he ignored them when it suited. Tobias was fairly sure that a fifteen-year stretch in prison probably passed quicker than the time Tony had spent working with Gibbs.
The undeniable fact was that Gibbs had returned from his life threatening shooting, angry at the whole damned world, but seemingly angriest at Tony. Tobias wasn't sure if it was because he did blame Tony for him getting shot, not that it was his 2IC's fault. He'd seen the security footage – Gibbs froze instead of reacting against the threat because of who it was. Still it wouldn't be the first time that Gibbs had blamed DiNotzo when the senior field agent was blameless, or punished him unjustly, either.
For example, when he'd been explicitly ordered not to reveal the existence of what turned out to be an 'unauthorised' undercover mission for then NCIS director, Jenny Shepard, who was also Jethro's former probie. Gibbs had been pissed off with him that he hadn't disobeyed a direct order from the director of the agency, when the truth was that he wasn't even in the country or Tony's superior when the operation was conceived. Considering how badly he'd treated him when he decided to return after retiring and leaving DiNotzo to deal with the consequences of his massive tantrum, Gibbs petty fit of pique over The Frog was exceedingly arrogant and high handed. Even for him!
Plus, Gibbs had definitely blamed Tony for following a direct order from Director Jenny Shepard to stand down when she selfishly decided to commit 'suicide by Russian dirtbags' in the California desert. This was a variation of 'suicide by cop' but equally deadly and effective, chosen because she was dying and she'd wanted to go out in a blaze of glory.
Oh sure, Jethro told DiNotzo it wasn't his fault but his actions belied those words. When Tony was deployed as agent afloat, he made no attempt to stay in contact with his former SFA. If it hadn't been for Abby hassling her Silver Fox to bring him home, Tobias doubted very much that Jethro would have bothered dragging him back to DC.
Fornell felt pretty certain the real reason Jethro finally got his head out of his ass to bring DiNotzo home again was that Leon Vance didn't want him back. So dragging him back from the Sea Hawk had been a definite slap in the face for the new Director, who'd backed down and let him stay. The pair had been engaging in typical alpha dog posturing to prove who was top dog ever since he'd taken up the directorship and it had been one nil to Gibbs.
The reason Tobias was so sure about his motivation for bring Tony home was because one sure fired way to get Gibbs to do something, even if he didn't want to, was to order him not to do it. Worked a treat and he could attest to its effectiveness, since it worked for him every time! Want Jethro's help on a difficult case – tell him to keep his damned mitts off and the stubborn bastard was immediately thumbing his nose at him and the FBI, knee deep in the investigation.
And as contrary as Gibbs could be (some would say childish) when told he had to do something, he could be equally unforgiving and vindictive when he felt slighted or wronged. It was pretty damned obvious that the whole Domino fubar, keeping his 2IC out of the loop was a petty tit-for-tat tactic to get even for La Grenouille and/or the debacle in the desert with the director. Personally, Tobias thought the real fiasco was when the SecNav appointed such an unsuitable candidate as Shepard for director of NCIS in the first place.
From where he was standing, Gibbs was really pissed off at Tony, maybe because he was shot, maybe because DiNotzo was a constant reminder that he let himself get shot and nearly died. Not to mention he was a witness to Jethro's massive failure, which would surely be eating away at him. Knowing Jethro as he did, Tobias would hazard a guess he was also furious about not taking down Budd, since the man lived, ate and breathed retribution.
Tony along with the CIA and DHS, managed to thwart him in his self-appointed role in taking down the latest bad guy - who in this instance was Daniel Budd. He'd even managed to be the hero and save Luke Harris where Gibbs had failed. From Gibbs point of view, Tony had robbed him of what he probably saw as his Gibbs-given right for vengeance. Honestly though, had Jethro really expected that NCIS, DHS and the CIA should all grind to a halt, wait months for him to get back on his feet and cleared to return to the field, just so he could take Budd down?
In retrospect, the former Marine probably did feel it even if he didn't think it, but apart from the inherent narcissism of such a desire – what about the innocent individuals at risk from this terrorist while he was recovering? The truth was that no one, not even Gibbs was indispensable and therein lay the rub, as far as Fornell could see.
DC chatter was that Tony had been a consummate professional, working the joint op with the CIA and DHS, to take down the lowlife who was courting and corrupting disenfranchised youths. He'd also taken especially good care of Joanna Teague's six, who as a CIA agent, was on the joint task force to capture her son, Ned Dornaget's killer. DiNotzo had been highly protective of Teague, stopping her from falling into the trap of killing Budd in white hot vengeance.
He'd made a genuine attempt to apprehend Daniel Budd, shooting to disarm so the terrorist could be interrogated and brought to trial to answer for the crimes against Ned and all the others whose lives were lost. Budd clearly had no intention of being taken alive though, and Tony had taken the kill shot, by the book, because unlike Gibbs, no matter how much he might want revenge, he believed in upholding the law more. It was another enigma that continued to puzzle Tobias when it came to DiNotzo. Unlike the rest of his team, the former cop believed in observing the law while he was enforcing it.
Still, Fornell didn't think that blaming Tony for getting shot and being pissed off that he'd to taken down Budd sans Gibbs, was the only thing that had stuck in Jethro's craw. He suspected his wrath was far more complex and also much more primitive than that and he decided that it wasn't all that shocking he'd had a meltdown in the bull pen. Too much anger – too little processing.
He had a hunch that Gibbs being forced to take extended sick leave while Tony lead the team was a bitter pill for him to swallow, since Gibbs WAS the job. He had nothing else to fall back on and too much time to brood on that fact and the inevitable truth. To be perfectly blunt, Fornell felt the Marine was getting past it - as this latest fubar with Budd amply demonstrated. He should retire from field work, because it was clear, following the shooting that he was a liability.
Even if he could still pass the physical requirements, his vulnerabilities including children, widows and females, especially when they played the surrogate daughter card, made him extremely vulnerable in the field. Emotionally he was a liability – it was pure luck that no one else had been hurt when he froze out there in the field.
Which was all by the by, since no one asked for the opinion of one aging FBI agent on Jethro exceeding his use by date. However, from what Tobias had heard via the DC grapevine, Gibbs had only been permitted to come back, albeit on desk duty, purely because Tony was in Hong Kong chasing down Budd and Vance decided Bishop and McGee needed a senior agent's supervision.
If his 2IC hadn't been off chasing down Budd, Fornell very much doubted that Vance would have ever entertained the idea of him returning early, even in a very limited capacity. The director had restricted him to desk duty, which would undoubtedly have hurt the arrogant git's pride and made him resent Tony even more. A definite case of the aging old lion looking at his successor and trying to figure out how to buy himself a few more years.
Of course once he had his foot in the door, Gibbs refused to follow orders to confine himself to desk duty but hell, that was 100 percent predictable. As far as Tobias was concerned, Leon Vance was an idiot if he expected Gibbs to stay out of the field, as ordered.
Tobias suspected Jethro was experiencing feelings of grief as he realised he wasn't as indispensable as he liked to think he was, and he probably hated that DiNotzo could stand in for him so successfully. Combine all that seething grief and resentment with the humiliating realisation he fucked up big time with the kid he'd befriended and then let down, which must be extremely galling for him. Toss in not being able to feed his Revenge Monster for all that pain by hunting down and killing Daniel Budd - his usual method of coping with emotional pain. That was a helluva lot of negative emotions for even a person who was well adjusted to deal with.
What it added up to was way too much anger – Gibbs default emotional setting and absolutely no way for it bleed off. It meant he was always going to end up taking it out on a convenient target, in this case his ever loyal personal whipping boy, Anthony DiNotzo. Unfortunately, at least in his own mind, he also had good reasons to be angry with him and for that he'd been pitiless.
As if that wasn't enough, there was also his near death experience that he was yet to properly acknowledge, let alone deal with in a healthy manner. Fornell was no shrink but he figured it had to be complicating Gibbs attitude and recovery. Realisation that he wasn't going to be the top dog field agent for too much longer and nothing else to fill the void, must surely be impacting. The truth was that Jethro had no family and very few friends. He'd made damned sure he pushed away everybody who cared about him, preferring to live with ghosts - Shannon, Kelly and Mike Franks.
Recently…well until the jerk cheated on his Bishop, Gibbs' best bud had been his probie's hubby – a NSA lawyer of all things and a relationship that in Tobias' opinion rather questionable. Currently, his pal cum father-confessor was Dr Taft, the surgeon that dug the bullets out of his body and saved him, since he'd done such a bang up job of alienating everyone else in his life.
Included an unwaveringly loyal partner who'd had his six for longer than all four of his marriages combined. And as Fornell readily admitted, Jethro's unpleasant personality traits meant that there wasn't exactly a plethora of people stepping up to be his friend. On a good day, Jethro deliberately pissed off the few people who'd tolerated all his shit over the years.
Hells bells, even his enemies knew that apart from THE JOB, he had nothing and no one in his life. When Sergei Mishnev - last year's arch nemesis was seeking a murder victim who was close to Gibbs, to make him suffer, he'd discovered that there wasn't anyone. Which was why Mishnev had resorted to killing his ex-wife Diane. There wasn't anyone else, except perhaps Abby. And how pathetic was that? Yeah, okay – he was still bitter that Emily had lost her mother because Diane had foolishly married a man incapable of loving her but it didn't alter the facts
Tobias sat there in his car, contemplating the behaviour of the veteran NCIS agent, who he'd long considered a friend, for want of a better way to classify their relationship, although lord knows, he didn't like him much at the moment. Meanwhile Tony pulled up in the driveway behind him, blocking him in. Looking at his watch, Fornell realised he'd been wool gathering for the last twenty or so minutes.
Climbing stiffly out of his agency vehicle, he cursed the fact that he wasn't a spring chicken anymore as his knees creaked in protest. If anyone could understand Jethro's angst about getting old and becoming irrelevant it was Tobias. Still he wasn't going to condone him taking it out on others – that was the coward's way.
Stretching his spine as it popped satisfyingly, he walked over to Tony's car and opened the door as DiNotzo stepped out, giving the fibbie a weak smile. Fornell studied Tony critically, noting the dispirited air, the slumped posture that screamed defeat and self-doubt. Tobias really wanted to head on over to Alexandria and shoot Gibbs in the ass with his Glock and then punch the bastard in the chops or maybe the nose. Hell why not both?
While he'd found DiNotzo infuriating and often extremely annoying, especially when he'd first met him, he'd gradually come to realise that it was mostly an act to hide an incredible complex personality away from prying eyes. But regardless, Tony had always exuded joie de vivre, a mercurial quality, some called it a zest for life, even if it was all just a performance. The fact that he didn't or couldn't be bothered faking it anymore spoke volumes about how low he must really be feeling.
As he dragged the beaten man through his front door, Tobias found himself having second thoughts. Was it right to do this to him when he was so down, so obviously depressed? Did they have the right to take advantage of him when he couldn't fight back?
And yet there really was no going back, not since the night he'd taken pity and dragged the poor sap home with him for a pathetic Thanksgiving Dinner with himself and Emily. The dye had been cast and Tobias couldn't go back and undo the past, even if he wanted to.
That night several months ago, Tony was still reeling from the first bruising encounter with the self-confessed love of his life, Jeanne Benoit. Plus, his relationship with DEA agent and former colleague at Philly PD, Zoe Keates, was in trouble. Who'd have thought a barely edible turkey dinner, a few drinks and a teenager with a cell phone, taking a bunch of selfies and uploading them to a plethora of social media sites would have had such an earth shattering consequences.
The fibbie couldn't help feeling that tonight was going to be a major disaster but maybe he was wrong; perhaps it would be DiNotzo's salvation. God knows, Tobias hoped so or he'd have to shoot himself along with Gibbs for kicking a wounded dog when he was down.
End Notes:
So I'm curious if anyone has any theories about Tobias' guest? All will be revealed in the next chapter, although there are some discreet clues about her identity in this one. At least I hope they're discreet, *running off to check again.*
Suffice to say this isn't a TIVA story.
