Disclaimer: I don't own, so you big guys in the Lamborghinis can sue me!!!
Sing 'Dude looks like a lady' whenever he comes into the room
Blame it on Tobi
Replace all of his explosive clay with Play-dough
Mold a copy of his scope in his explosive clay
Steal his scope, and replace it with your clay one
When he goes to wake himself up the next morning by splashing water in his face, watch as the clay explodes
For that whole day run around him screaming "UN!" repeatedly
Sneak into his room at night and place a bowl of cornflakes right where he will step when he wakes up
When he wakes and steps, scream "WHY YA STEPPIN IN MAH CORNFLAKES, UN?!"
Dress up exactly like him, with a Play-dough scope, and right down to the hairstyle, look like a shadow clone
Make it so that he can only eat cornflakes for breakfast
Hide in the fridge
When he inevitably has a bowl of cornflakes, jump out of the fridge and scream "YA STILL UP IN MAH CORNFLAKES, UN?!" still clad in you're Deidara costume
If you're a girl say "Hey Girlfriend, un! Wanna go shopping, un?" while still in you're Deidara out fit
If you're a guy say "DUDE, UN! A HOTT CHICK, UN! Hey baby, wanna go out sometime, un?"
In both cases you'll get a reply of "IM NOT A GIRL, UN!" before you spray him with pixie stick sugar
When he looks at you funny, snap your fingers
A sugar crazed Tobi will bound in, and start eating the sugar you sprayed on Deidara
Snap you're fingers again, and a fountain of sugar and a mountain of candy will appear in the middle of the room
Scream "CANDY MOUNTAIN, UN! CANDY MOUNTAIN, UN! FILL ME UP WITH SWEET SUGARY GOODNESS, UN!!" Whilst doing the worm on top of the mountain of candy
Then shove a toy dinosaur in front of Deidara
Scream "IT'S A LEOFLORIDON CHARLIE, UN! A MAGICAL LEOFLORIDON, UN!" and swich to the Numa Numa Dance
When he asks you what the heck you're doing un, make him watch 'Charlie the Unicorn'
When he starts twitching, take him into a bowling ally
Use an explosive clay bomb as you're bowling ball
When Deidara screams "NO, UN!" don't listen, and throw the ball
When the bowling ally explodes say "SHE DID IT, UN!" and point to Deidara
He'll blame it on Tobi
Tobi will blame it on you
Start playing the blame game
Walk with Deidara and hide a radio fixed to sing 'Barbie Girl' in his robes
Mind you, you are STILL in you're Deidara costume
Rig it so that when he trys to turn it off it gets louder
MUCH louder
Sell his underwear to fangirls as he tries to destroy the radio
Force him to eat cake
Force him to eat Fishcakes
Tell him that you sold his teddies to fangirls
Then tell him that 'teddies' means underwear
Happily proclaim that you're the reason Deidara lost his arms
Then proclaim even happier that you are Lord of the Underwear
No, I didn't mess up just then
When he looks at you funny again, climb on top of his head and do the Running Man
Insist that if he doesn't join you, you won't stop
When he reluctantly joins you, jump off doing the worm in mid-air
Tell him that the Running Man went out of style before he was born
Still doing the worm in your Deidara costume explain the phrase 'Yaio' and 'Yuri'
When he starts twitching stop doing the worm and switch to the Robot
Then explain the phrase 'Detailed Lemon' as it applies to fanfiction
Show him a Detailed Lemon in the form of an Icha Icha Paradise book
As he pulls out a kunai to stab himself tell him "Naughty, naughty, Deidei-chan, not until you finish your cornflakes." Shaking your finger like a scolding mother
Sure enough on the table in the kitchen there are his unfinished cornflakes
Instead of letting him finish them, make spaghetti
And pile it with chocolate sauce, marshmallows, M'n'M's, and gummy bears (like in Elf)
Squirt a large amount of ketchup on it and get Tobi to force feed Deidei-chan
The result:
Deidara woke up and his scope exploded, and all of this clay was replaced with Play-dough. Tobi ran around him in circles yelling 'UN!' all day, he got yelled at for stepping in cornflakes, he had a hallucination involving a shadow clone and a Candy Mountain, he blew up a bowling ally, he had to eat Kisame's home cooking, his 'teddies' were sold to his fangirls, he did a really out-of-date dance, he was exposed to the horror of the Icha Icha series, his mother used his nickname with him, and he had to eat spaghetti that was covered in many things that should never be eaten on spaghetti.
All in all, a fairly normal day. Now if he could only find his clay…
Thanks so much! Press the review button, you know you want to...
