I'll bet you're wondering why they're not teenagers. I don't know, I just couldn't seem to place Megamind anywhere if they were in high school and she wouldn't notice him. So they're just a few years younger than they appear in the movie.


It had been a month since the lovely new reporter had caught his eye and Megamind had hardly missed one of her reports, despite him breaking out and failing at an evil plot thrice in that period. He hadn't told Minion about his latest obsession, for he knew he would nag him about it. Not a single one of her reports had a flaw in it. She was…perfect.

Then one day, he saw her doing an interview with Metro Man and Megamind immediately scowled, but softened when his eyes turned to her.

"How do you suggest we keep our city clean?" Roxanne asked the hero.

"Well, Roxie," Metro Man winked, "I think if we all work together, we can clean up all the garbage in this city!"

She paused before continuing. "New Year's Eve is tomorrow. Do you have any resolutions?"

"I resolute to maybe find a girl and settle down. Are you interested?"

Megamind scowled again. He was hitting on his Roxanne! Wait, why was he calling her that? Then he glanced at the reporter and could have sworn she was trying not to cringe.

"Speaking of New Year's," Metro Man said into the camera, "there's a masquerade party going on over at the Scott Mansion on New Year's Eve and I'm gonna be there. All of Metro City is invited!"

The villain rolled his eyes. Everyone knew Metro Man's secret identity, even if he was pretending he wasn't Wayne Scott.

"Well, I'm sure it will be the biggest bash of the year," said Roxanne. "Thank you, Metro Man, for your time."

"It's been my pleasure, Roxie."

Megamind's eyes burned with jealousy as the hero kissed her hand before flying off. Roxanne looked shocked for a second but then put on a fake smile.

"It looks like it's going to be another great year in Metro City with our hero watching over us. This is Roxanne Ritchi, reporting live from an exclusive interview with Metro Man."

He slumped in his chair as the news went to commercial. He didn't like the fact that his rival seemed interested in Miss Ritchi. But then again, what was the point of him watching her on TV every day? He could never really meet her. He was the villain after all. Still, he could dream, couldn't he?

Then his ears picked up a faint beeping on the other side of the wall and he grinned with delight. Minion, you fantastic fish, you, was his last thought before the wall exploded into debris.


The pair of criminals cackled as they entered the abandoned warehouse.

"Oh, I tell you, Minion!" Megamind said to his fish friend. "There's no place like Evil Lair!"

"I kept it cold and damp, just for you, sir," Minion assured him.

After he had slipped out of his orange jumpsuit and into his evil outfit, he was met with a swarm of excited Brainbots. He threw them a wrench so they would be kept busy.

"So what's the plan this time, sir?" his minion asked. "You didn't give me anything to work with before your last arrest."

"I want to take a break before our next evil plot, Minion," Megamind explained, swinging into his leather chair. "It is the holidays, after all, and I had to spend Chris-moss in jail."

"That's what you get for trying to steal everyone's Christmas presents the night before."

"What? It was fun until Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes ruined it all!"

"By the way, sir, I found something interesting in the paper today."

He held the issue up and Megamind's heart sank. The headline read "New Year Kicks off with New Couple," and under it was a picture of his nemesis flying with Roxanne Ritchi in his arms.

"Apparently, Metro Man has become involved with this new reporter," Minion observed. "If he has a girlfriend, maybe we could use her as bait to lure Metro Man into our plots!"

He'd have to use that beautiful woman as bait? For some reason, that didn't sit right for him. But what else could he do? She had chosen his rival, and that didn't seem to make any sense either. She hadn't looked that interested earlier, but looks can be deceiving.

Minion had been excited that he had come up with a brilliant idea for his boss, but that feeling faded when he saw the blue alien's sad expression.

"Is something wrong, sir?"

"Oh, it's nothing," Megamind said, shaking it off. "Good idea, Minion. I'll think about it."

Then he recalled something Metro Man had said on television and brightened up.

"Minion, how would you like to have some fun on New Year's Eve?"


Roxanne screamed when she saw the morning newspaper coming home that night.

"Shocked that they found your dirty little secret, huh?" Rachel taunted, coming into the room while eating a yogurt. She was still living with her, paying half of the rent with her money from her job at the restaurant.

"This is a lie!" Roxanne insisted. "Wayne was offering me a lift home the other day and I didn't see any harm in it. I didn't know someone had a camera!"

"Relax, Roxie." Rachel joined her on the couch. "I hardly believe anything the news says, except for when you're reporting it. By the way, I've made us costumes for the New Year's party! Wait until you see them. We're gonna look fabulous! I love how we don't reveal ourselves until midnight! No one will recognize us at all!"

"We're not going, are we?"

"Of course we're going! Sure, Metro Man can be a bit annoying, but this is the perfect opportunity for us to get back in the game and meet someone nice!"

"Not this thing again! I'm not ready!"

"It's been three months and one for me! I'm over Brad and it's time you get over Benjamin!"

"I don't know. Now that everyone thinks I'm dating Wayne, I don't think anyone would dare try."

"Like I said, you'll be wearing a mask and no one will recognize you, not even Metro Man with his x-ray vision!" When her sister said nothing, she realized the problem. "I get it. You're afraid it will be Benjamin all over again. It's time to move on, girl! What happened with Benjamin was his fault, not yours. I'll tell you what. How about we play a little game?"

"What sort of game?"

"You tell me what qualities you want in a guy, and I'll tell you what qualities I want in a guy. That way, we can help search for each other's perfect match at the party!"

"I don't know, sis."

"Come on! If you don't think Metro Man is your type, what is your type?"

Roxanne thought for a moment. "Well, he'd have to be smart, I guess."

"How smart? Be more specific."

"Well, maybe not a super genius, but at least someone who meets my intellectual level."

"So you are looking for a super genius."

The older sister chuckled. "He should also be funny enough to make me laugh."

"That's true. You don't laugh that often anymore, I mean really laugh."

"We should share the same interests. Not all of them, but some so we have something to talk about. He should also be sensitive and romantic."

"How sensitive and romantic are we talking?"

"Well, I don't know. I guess he'd read me poetry, take me on picnics, bring me flowers…you know, the typical stuff."

"Okay, my turn. Let's see. My guy should also be funny and romantic, I suppose. He'd be sweet enough to bring me gifts. Simple gifts, not like diamonds and rubies. He'd cook me delicious meals, except seafood!"

This time, Roxanne did laugh.

"What? I hate seafood! My perfect guy cannot be a fish eater either! Okay, last but not least, the guy would have to be…"

"Out of this world," Roxanne finished with her. "We're all looking for a Romeo."

"Technically," Rachel said, "Metro Man is out of this world, because he's an alien."

"You know what I mean, Rach."

"But if it's Metro Man you don't want, Megamind is an alien too."

Roxanne gaped at her. "You can't be serious!"

"Why not? You said you want a guy with brains, and his is enormous! And I suppose he's funny. That so-called 'witty banter' he and Metro Man do is kind of silly. As for romantic, who knows? They say bad boys know how to please a woman."

"Rachel, stop it!"

Her sister giggled. "I'm only kidding, Roxanne! Still, promise me you'll try and find someone new at the party?"

"Alright, as long as you don't bring up Megamind ever again!"

"No problem. Mom would kill you anyway. In fact, she'd kill you if you were dating anyone who wasn't Metro Man. That means yours might be a forbidden love! You want a Romeo, right? He and Juliet met at a party and theirs was a forbidden love!"

"That's not what I meant."

"All the same, it's possible, right?"


On New Year's Eve, Megamind handed Minion one of the holowatches he had made adjustments to.

"Are you sure about this, sir?" the fish asked. "Crashing parties isn't what we normally do."

"Who says mega villains can't have fun, too?" Megamind argued. "He won't even know we're there, Minion. I've made new holograms for both of us! Everyone else is in disguise, after all."

They simultaneously turned the dial on their watches. Megamind became a human wearing a black suit and a white mask covering half his face. Minion found it oddly appropriate. Then he glanced in the mirror and found himself as a human in a merman costume, complete with a golden crown, long fake beard and blue mask. His brown eyes were the only thing that hadn't changed.

"You were right, sir," Minion observed. "I don't even recognize us. Though why am I a mermaid?"

"I believe the term is merman, Minion. And it's because you're a fish, so you can act the part easily."

"Sir, I still think this is a bad idea."

"Yes! This is a very wickedly bad idea for the greater good of bad!"

"Not what I meant, sir. What if we get caught?"

"Then we get out of there as fast as we can. In the meantime, we'll have the time of our lives!"

The truth was he wanted to get Roxanne Ritchi out of his mind. Even if she would be at the party, she'd be wearing a mask and at least her beautiful face wouldn't distract him.


It gets better, trust me!