Inside Italia

Romano is insecure.

Sicily feels like he's living under everyone's shadow.

Sardinia is torn between two personalities.

Vaticano is still living in the Renaissance.

San Marino can't let go of old grudges.

Seborga can't do anything to stop his brother's fighting.

Veneziano blames himself for all of it.

Beneath the veil, the Italian family really isn't as happy and perfect as it seems...

=X=

Inside Italia
Sicily – Inferiority

~~::.::~~

Sicily barely moves as San Marino storms back in, his face red from anger, Veneziano trailing sadly behind. He knows that Romano has been taken away by Spain, and he somewhat suspects they won't be getting him back for a while either. Vaticano has a grimace on his features, and Sicily can tell what he's thinking. It makes him flinch slightly.

"He can't just take him away! Dammit, I won't let him steal Romano from us again!" San Marino growls. Vaticano gives him a look, reprimanding him silently for the language.

Seborga has come to seek refuge with his brother and sister, curling up between them and watching the two elders. Sicily does his best to comfort him, by placing one hand over his brother's, but Seborga barely seems to notice and quickly leaves to hide behind Veneziano instead. Sicily frowns, hurt by the lack of acknowledgment, and averts his eyes from his family.

San Marino is still ranting and Vaticano is adding his own input. Veneziano is hugging Seborga, and he's pulled Sardinia over with him, but Sicily is just left there to scowl by himself. He plays with the rim of his hat, the one Romano gave him, and pulls it a little further over his eyes.

If Romano was here, he'd be yelling at them to shut the fuck up. But he's not, so he can't. So they continue to shout and rage about Spain.

"Feli!" San Marino suddenly barks, drawing the attention of the youngest twin. "Spain likes you, right? You can go and talk to him. Get Romano to come back. Right, fratellino?"

San Marino has advanced slightly on Veneziano, and the younger Italian has backed away slightly.

"I-I don't know, Santo..." he stutters. He doesn't want to upset San Marino more, nor does he want to be the one trying to talk to Spain or trying to persuade Romano to return.

Sicily can see why. It's been a long time since he and Romano lived with Spain as children, but he still remembers it. He remembers Romano's secret smiles, whenever Spain smiled at him, praised him. He remembers Spain's doting on his brother. He remembers the fire that would ignite in the Spaniard's eyes whenever his Romano was threatened, the anger that rose when his Romano was hurt. And he recognises it.

Once again, Spain has saved Romano and left Sicily behind. He'd seen him earlier, he'd greeted him earlier – his bright smile, it still made Sicily's heart skip a beat when it was directed at him – but he'd been forgotten for Romano. Again. Like always.

San Marino is apparently so happy to have them back, for them to be a family. Everyone agrees with him. But really, Sicily would much rather go back with Spain and Romano. His brothers fought, and his brothers forgot and ignored him. Of course, Spain ignored or forgot him sometimes too, but Romano didn't. Not as often as the others.

Sicily slips out of the room, as usual, unnoticed.

~~::.::~~

For days, the atmosphere in the house is sour. There's shouting and upset. Veneziano has his face buried in his arms a lot of the time. Seborga is creeping around quietly, clinging to Veneziano whenever possible. Vaticano seems to be constantly muttering prayers to his rosary, and the mention of Spain and Romano makes him wince, though this happens rarely since it also causes San Marino to explode. Sardinia no longer looks torn between a sweet smile and a deep frown; if she's not glaring death at people or things, she looks scared out of her wits.

Sicily just sits and watches. He tried to talk to Veneziano days earlier, but he was brushed off with a tired 'Not now, Sicily.'. He tried to help Seborga, but his little brother just shook his head and muttered 'Nothing is the same anymore, fratello.'. He went to see Sardinia, and she screamed at him to 'Go the fuck away, idiota!'.

So now Sicily just stands to the side and watches his family tear themselves up as they try to put themselves together. He goes to the meeting with them, as usual, and the tension is so thick when they arrive and Spain is there, alone, that he cannot bear to be around them. He watches over Seborga as he sits and talks to the other micros, Sealand and Wy, and can't help but wonder how the little boy who has been walking around as if afraid to step on a mine can still be so loud and boisterous with his friends.

"Hey, Sicily."

Sicily looks up at the soft voice. Shetland smiles gently at him, and sits on the seat to his left. Shetland is the only person who notices him outside of his house; she's usually charged with the task of watching her little brother, Sealand, so they often end up in the same place for the whole meeting. He nods his head at her silently, to show he's heard her.

"How are you?" she asks, as she normally does.

"'M 'kay." Sicily mumbles. He doesn't want to put his family's problems on her. Even so, he's silently happy that she bothers enough to enquire; after all, most people barely greet him, let alone start conversation.

"Really? You look a little upset." Shetland frowns delicately, her lips pouting slightly. "And Romano isn't here. Is he alright?"

Sicily flinches non-too discreetly. He frowns and pulls his hat low over his eyes.

"I'm fine. We're fine. Just leave it alone." He replies. Shetland bats her eyes at him in surprise, but doesn't say anything otherwise. She puts a hand on his shoulder, and they sit there in silence, watching their brothers racing around and laughing.

~~::.::~~

Sicily watches as Veneziano returns again, tears in his eyes, apologising for still not being able to talk to Spain or Romano. San Marino sits with his head in his hands, growling lowly and getting louder, and Seborga bolts from the room.

"I-I'm sorry, he just doesn't want to talk... R-Romano's fine, he was calling for Spain in the background, b-but fratello, I don't think I should go anymore..." Veneziano stutters, pulling his coat tighter to try and hide himself within it.

"I don't care if he doesn't want to talk. He needs to be here, and Spain can't force him to stay there." Santo hisses.

"I don't think Spain is forcing him to do anything." Sicily says, but none of his brothers pay much attention.

"We didn't have these problems until Spain showed up." Vaticano still keeps a serenely calm look about him, but his expression is cold and his eyes hard. "Spain has been luring and tempting our brother away with his unclean intentions for years. Now he's finally succeeded in stealing our fratellino away from us, so that he can do with him what he pleases."

Sicily feels himself getting more and more annoyed with Vaticano's dumb ranting. He's always been so against Spain and Romano, he'd been angry at Holy Roman Empire before... and he's still the same. He doesn't know anything, and yet he just keeps going on about it.

"It's not like that. Spain hasn't been luring or tempting Romano into anything. You don't know what he's like." Sicily says, louder, standing up to make himself seen, make himself heard. He doesn't want to be ignored anymore.

"Sicily, you're as disillusioned as Romano is." Vaticano brushes him off casually, turning away as if to dismiss him.

"I'm not disillusioned. What if Romano wants to stay with Spain, huh?" Sicily shoots back angrily.

"Why would he want to stay with that basta-" San Marino starts, but Sicily cuts across him.

"I would!" For a moment, Vaticano and San Marino stare at him. He huffs. "Spain's place is much nicer. There's no fighting there. He doesn't have to put up with you two" Sicily glares at his older brothers, getting the point across. "-looking down on him. I think we should let him stay with Spain. He'll be happier there."

For a moment, San Marino and Vaticano just stare at him. For a moment, he thinks maybe he's gotten through to them. Then San Marino turns away from him, completely ignoring him, like he's invisible, and says firmly to Veneziano "You're going again tomorrow."

Sicily, red-faced from the embarrassment of having been completely blown off by his brother, storms out of the room, kicking the table as he goes.

~~::.::~~

The next week goes in much the same way. Veneziano still has no luck in convincing Spain to talk to him long enough to say anything other than "Leave, he doesn't want to talk." and now he's starting to beg Santo to stop making him go. Sicily constantly tries to persuade them to just let Romano be, but every time he is purposely ignored.

Now, all he wants to do is get out of the house. He grabs his coat and purposefully leaves his phone behind, so none of his brothers can contact him. If they even try to contact him. He doesn't care. He darts quickly out of the door, and he's free, as far as he can tell. No-one runs after him, and he's glad of that.

He sets off walking. He's not entirely conscious of where he's going, but he gets the feeling he's probably heading somewhere. For now, he just enjoys the cool air outside, the sun gently warming his face, the free, tensionless atmosphere that isn't filled with angry shouts and agitated cries.

Sicily looks up, and recognises the house he's stopped at instantly. He debates whether to knock, or if he should just turn away. But he knows why he's here. He'd much rather be here, than with his brothers. So he lifts his fist and knocks, and waits for the answer.

When Spain comes to the door, he's not the usual overly-smiley, carefree and happy Spain. His eyebrows are knitted together in a frown, his lips pursed slightly, and his eyes are dark.

"You should tell your brothers" Spain starts, in an unfamiliar and cold voice "That sending someone other than Veneziano will not work any better."

"I'm not here for my brothers!" Sicily cuts across desperately. "I just want to talk to Romano!"

"You can't, and neither will any of your brothers, nor Sardinia either if they get that idea."

"But why?" Sicily is upset that Spain doesn't seem to have heard him, but he persists.

"You wouldn't understand. You don't understand what you've done to your own brother. Now go back home." Spain practically growls, and he shuts the door in Sicily's face. For a moment the Italian just stands there in shock, before he walks away, head down in defeat.

~~::.::~~

Sicily can't help but feel restless the next day. He wants to talk to someone. Usually he'd talk to Romano, who he was closest to, but... he couldn't, because somehow they'd managed to upset him to the point of breaking, and Spain was on the protective. He'd never turn to Vaticano, because they don't get on well, and though he might go to San Marino if desperate enough, he was in too much of a mood.

He sighs, and pulls his hat lower over his eyes, relaxing back into the settee in the for once quiet living room. He looks over and notices Seborga creeping in through the archway.

The youngest sibling has been wearing the same nervous expression for weeks, only masking it with an attempted bright smile when he needs to. He's starting to remind Sicily of Corsica; shrunk into himself with darting eyes, prone to jumping at the slightest noise.

"Oi, Seborga." He calls gently, and as expected Seborga flinches slightly, looking sharply at his older brother. Sicily holds his hand out, gesturing him over. "Come sit with me."

Seborga walks over, looking a bit quizzical; Sicily usually isn't so open about wanting to be near his siblings, and definitely isn't gentle what he is. Even so, he sits carefully beside him and looks over expectantly.

"Ponzio... are you alright?" Sicily asked quietly. Seborga blinks in surprise at the careful, gentle tone and use of his human name.

"Wh-what?"

"I know it's a sort of stupid question but... still. There's something bothering you, am I right?" Sicily rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, and pulls at the brim of his hat. He's not used to being close and affectionate with his siblings, but he wants to talk to them; even if it means just listening to his little brother's problems and not voicing his own. He wants to know he does still exist to them.

Seborga fidgets slightly, playing with his fingers and looking at the floor. Sicily faces him completely, letting him know he's there, he's listening; something his family seems to forget to do around him.

"I don't like the fighting." He mumbles eventually. In that moment Sicily can see the ten-year-old boy Seborga really is; yes, he's a nation and yes, he has a strong spirit, but he's still a child and he can be upset.

"I know. I don't like it either." Sicily replies gently. Seborga looks up, disbelieving, and shakes his head.

"You don't get it. You're not little like I am. They shut up when you tell them to." Sicily thinks that obviously, Seborga is mistaking him for Romano and 'telling' them to shut up is the same as yelling your head off at them.

"No-one can shut up Santo and Piero when they get started – you know how they are." Sicily tries to smirk, but it comes out as a grim smile. "But they'll calm down eventually. And then when Roma is better, maybe everyone can make up."

Sicily is lying through his teeth and in the back of his mind, he knows it. While San Marino may eventually stop shouting and flaring up, he keeps grudges for years, and he'll still be angry. When, and Sicily refuses to think if because Romano has to get better, he has to... When Romano gets better, there is no way Spain will ever let him out of his sight. Relationships will be strained at the most. And come to the worst...

But Sicily tries to keep a look of utter confidence on his face, to comfort Seborga. But maybe something shows through his eyes, because Seborga starts shaking his head again, starting to rise.

"Y-you don't understand." Seborga tells him, tears starting to brim in his eyes, and he bolts, leaving Sicily alone and hurt.

~~::.::~~

That evening, Sicily walks into the room he still shares with Sardinia; the two had been relatively close when they were young, since they were the same age, and had shared a room with Corsica when he still lived with them, and they'd simply kept it that way. Sicily still had the top bunk of the bed Corsica was constantly afraid would fall on him, and Sardinia still slept in the bed on the other side of the room.

Sardinia is sat on the bottom bunk, hands gripping tightly at the covers, hard enough for her whole body to shake. Her lips move soundlessly and her eyes are screwed tightly shut.

"Sardinia?" Sicily asks, frowning. When his sister doesn't respond, he tries again. "Sorella? Ey, Valeria!"

Sardinia jumps and stares at him. Emotions flicker over her face before she scowls.

"Don't call me that." She hisses at him. "What do you want?"

Sicily winces, knowing that his sister is having one of her turns and will be in a crazy mood for a while. He doesn't like it when she suddenly turns fierce and cold, and right now she seems to have more of the former.

"Nothing." He replies quickly. Usually the best thing to do, he has learnt, is to just leave Sardinia be. She narrows her eyes.

"Well, why the fuck are you up here so early?" she snaps back, standing up to perch on her own bed.

"I'm tired." Sicily shrugs. He really is. He's tired of having to put up with all the shit going on, he's tired of being ignored, but he's physically tired as well. He just wants to sleep it off.

"Tired!" Sardinia laughs harshly. "You don't even know how tired I am!"

"Tired of what?" Although Sicily is weary, he still tries to strike up conversation; maybe Sardinia will calm down. Her sharp look dulls and she looks away from him.

"Everything. Just everything. I'm tired of all of this." She sighs, and raises a hand to her forehead. For a moment her face screws up, as if she's trying not to cry, and Sicily moves closer to put an arm around his sorellina. Her reaction is violent, and it startles him.

"Don't touch me!" she yells, hitting his arm off her and shoving him back. Sicily scrambles for a moment, hitting into the bunk-bed's ladder and backing up it slightly.

"I was only trying to help..." he murmurs, once again hurt that his sibling didn't want to talk to him – were they really so against him...?

"Help? You can't help me." Sardinia growls through clenched teeth. "You don't understand anything of what I'm going through. You don't understand anything."

With that, Sardinia grabs her nightwear and storms from the room, slamming the door loudly behind her. Sicily sighs and climbs up into his bed, carefully taking off his hat and changing into his pyjamas.

~~::.::~~

Sicily turns over again. It must be the middle of the night, and no matter how much he tries, the Italian just can't settle down to sleep. He can hear Sardinia murmuring incomprehensible words in her sleep, and the rustle of her bed-sheets every time she moves.

Carefully, Sicily sits himself up. Sardinia appears to be fast asleep, curled tightly in a ball and facing the wall, her back resolutely turned to Sicily. Keeping an eye on her to make sure he doesn't rouse her (because he really does not want to wake Sardinia up...), he climbs down from the bunk and pads softly out of the room.

Outside his room, in the corridor, the air is cooler and Sicily shivers slightly. His bare feet barely make a sound as he creeps carefully past Vaticano and San Marino's rooms and across the hall to Veneziano's room.

Veneziano's room is actually relatively unused; it had once been shared between Romano and Veneziano, before Romano decided to get his own room, and after that Veneziano would regularly ditch his own bed to creep in with Romano or occasionally San Marino.

Tonight however, Veneziano's room is in use, and Sicily can see his older brother's form underneath the blankets. He tiptoes slightly closer, and whispers tentatively.

"Veneziano?"

"Mm?" comes the replying mumble. Apparently Veneziano wasn't sleeping too well either, because he is usually a very heavy sleeper and barely anything could wake him up. Sicily carefully crawls onto the bed and slips under the covers, next to his brother. Veneziano blinks sleepily at him.

"Sicily? Are you okay?" he murmurs, raising a hand to place it on Sicily's arm. The smaller brother makes a small negative noise in the back of his throat and shakes his head slightly.

"I... I don't like how angry Santo and Vaticano are." He replies at length. Veneziano sighs.

"None of us do, Giovanni. But there's not a lot we can really do about it I'm afraid."

"But why are they so mad?" Sicily's voice rises slightly. "Why do they have such a problem with Roma and Spagna? I know Vaticano is a stuck up bastard, but why does San Marino hate him so much?"

Veneziano seems to think for a moment, but eventually he just shakes his head.

"I don't think you'd really understand, Gio. It's complicated." He says, and he sounds extremely tired – not usual for Veneziano, usually so full of life and vigour.

"Tell me! I can understand it! I want to know, dammit!" Sicily cries. Veneziano can't do this to him too...

"Dispiace, ma no, fratellino. Just try to sleep. I don't want to talk about this right now." Sicily can hear the strain in Veneziano's voice, showing that the topic is just as painful to him as it is to Sicily, but it still hurts that his brother won't tell him. He pulls away from Veneziano's comforting hand and curls up away from him, frowning slightly.

In his mind, it all clicks into place. They all think he can't understand them; they don't understand him. They see straight through him and ignore him, they brush him off and act like his thoughts and opinions and feelings don't matter.

Well then. He doesn't care. They were all fuckers anyway. Two can play that game.

He ignores Veneziano's quiet goodnight.

They don't want to see him? Well he won't see them either.

~~::.::~~

Early the next morning, Sicily blinks his eyes open. Veneziano is asleep beside him, and has moved in his sleep to be curling close to his brother; one arm draped over the younger's torso and his face buried in his back. Sicily frowns and pries himself away, pulling himself from the warmth of the covers and quickly walking out of the room. He peeks around his bedroom door, and Sardinia is still asleep; now more relaxed and splayed slightly. He pulls on a loose shirt and some casual trousers, and pads downstairs to the kitchen. He leaves his hat behind, deciding that it was so early that there's no way anyone would see him before he went back to bed.

Sicily fills a glass with water and swigs from it, letting his mind think about everything that has happened in the past few weeks. And to think not long ago, he was annoyed as usual with his brothers, but he was still relatively happy with them...

The Italian carefully reaches for a tomato. Usually, taking a tomato from Romano's bowl would get him a slap around the head if he hadn't asked, but if he was forced to think of one up point of Romano not being around, it was that there were more tomatoes. Sicily leans forward against the counter, carefully eating the red fruit and sighing almost happily in the silence.

"Ro...Romano?" a careful, drowsy voice asks from behind him. Instantly, Sicily freezes, his grip on the counter tightening and his whole body going ridged. He can tell that it is a half-awake Veneziano standing behind him, disbelief and a small undertone of hope broadcasting in his words.

Romano isn't here. Sicily is the only one in the kitchen, other than Veneziano. So...

"Fratello!" Sicily feels a pair of arms fling themselves around his shoulders, and Veneziano buries his face in his neck. "Grazie a Dio..."

Before he can say anything else, Sicily throws him off harshly, jabbing an elbow hard into his side and whirling round to push him away.

"I'm not Romano!" he yells, rounding fiercely on his brother. Veneziano's face drops and shows his guilt and horror for all the world to see.

"Oh God... Sicily... Mi dispiace, from behind, you look so..."

"I don't care!" Sicily cries, balling his fists at his side. "You should be able to tell your own brothers apart! What, I'm so insignificant to you that I might as well just be Romano? I'm my own nation! I'm Sicily! I'm your brother, Sicily!"

Behind the anger, Sicily is so, so hurt. His brothers can't even tell him apart from Romano; they can't recognise him as a separate person. Why is he so insignificant? Why does he just fade into the background, becoming a shadow of unheard opinions and unseen gestures? They think he's too young, he won't understand, he can't understand, why won't they understand him...?

"I know! Giovanni, mi dispiace tanto, I'm so, so sorry!" Veneziano tries desperately to fix his mistake, but Sicily just pushes him away, red-faced and trying not to cry.

"You don't understand! None of you understand what it's like, to be ignored, to be forgotten, you'll never understand!" Sicily is practically screaming now, and he storms fast up the stairs. He roughly pulls on a proper shirt and clean, smart trousers, and jams his hat hard onto his head, managing to do so without awakening his sister – a miracle, really, but he doesn't think that. He wants her to wake up, to notice he's leaving, to plead him to stop and to stay... but it's like she can't hear his badly suppressed sobs, and she continues to sleep peacefully.

As he tries to run out of the door Veneziano grabs his arm, and he cries and begs Sicily not to leave, not as well, but Sicily just wrenches himself free and sprints away as fast as he can. He runs without direction, without purpose – he just runs, and his tears falls fast from his eyes, but there is no one there to see them.

Sicily feels more alone than ever.

~~::.::~~

A/N: Here it is guys! The next chapter of our favourite unhappy family~ xD

I'm sorry it's so much longer than Romano's, but it needed to be. Sorry if there are mistakes at all, I've checked it over but it may have a few small things.

I'm so happy with the feedback I got for this! I'm so glad so many people liked it, and I hope the following chapters live up to the target I set myself. Apparently it had a much stronger impact than I quite expected xD

Reviewers will be thanked at the bottom and a few questions answered, but first just a little background.

As Red In The Morning pointed out, most of the brothers are OCs. I'd actually completely forgotten that xD
We've developed them so much, and use them so much, that I'd actually forgotten that Sicily and Sardinia and such were OCs. But I'm not going to add anything into the description, because sometimes seeing 'OCs' scares off readers. But I'm glad people like them so far. However, seeing as they are OCs, you guys will need some background info, huh?

So each chapter about an OC (basically everyone else now until Veneziano xD) with have a little background and description in the A/N down here~ And I'll also have just a general thing.

Sicily: Sicily appears about 17, and looks a lot like a younger Romano. He is barely ever seen without his fedora hat (think Mafiatalia, guys~) which was given to him by Romano. Out of his brothers, he gets on with Romano the best, but is at constant conflict with Vaticano. When he was young, he developed a crush on Spain but upon discovering Romano's similar feelings, chose to let Romano pursue his happiness, giving up on his own. He's bisexual and at some point ends up with Shetland (I imagine this happening sometime after this story has taken place, but that's who we pair him with) but at the moment, he still has a few lingering feelings for Spain (this is why Spain noticing him means so much to him). Sometimes he considers Spain and Romano more of his true family than his other siblings. Deep down he's insecure, and feels like he is constantly ignored or forgotten, but hides it behind a grumpy exterior. His human name is Giovanni Vargas.

So there you go! Just a bit of background info for him, so you understand him a bit more. He does seem a lot like a young Romano, and they are extremely similar, but have their differences.

While we're at it, just to help you visualise the family, here's some brief bits of information:

San MarinoSanto Vargas, appears around 26. Oldest brother.

Vaticano – Piero Vargas, appears about 22. Same age as Romano but acts older.

Romano – Lovino Vargas, appears about 22. Same age as Vaticano.

Veneziano – Feliciano Vargas, appears about 20. 'Middle' child.

Sicily – Giovanni Vargas, appears about 17. Same age as Sardinia and Corsica but seems to act as oldest.

Sardinia – Valeria Vargas, appears about 17. Same age as Sicily and Corsica.

Corsica (minor character) – Leonardo Vargas, appears about 17. Same age as Sicily and Sardinia, but seems to be treated as the youngest.

Seborga – Ponzio Vargas, appears about 10. Youngest child.

Keep in mind that by 'age' I mean physical age. You can go and work out actual nation ages xD

Also, most of these OCs were thought up by my friend Meso the Hanyu and then developed in conversations between us. So San Marino, Sicily, Sardinia, Corsica and Seborga belong mainly to her, and Mr. Asshole Vaticano belongs mainly to me xD (Can you believe I only came up with him to cause conflict in a Spamano fic I was planning? xD) And obviously Romano and Veneziano belong to Hidekaz Himaruya. Good good, it's important that you know that and give her due credit for her awesome OCs. So if you like them, remember to thank her as well ;D

I'm thinking of drawing some illustrations for this story as well, as some more help~ I have one, but it doesn't have Sic or Sardinia and it's a little too happy looking for this xD

So, now, to my dear reviewers~~

THANK YOU, GRAZIE, LOTS OF LOVE TO THESE AMAZING PEOPLE:

Anon. Anonymous, ScatteredSands, nekoNamine, MakenshiCrona, JuleBeilschmidt, Red In The Morning, Silan Haye, Bluesoxrox and Asshu-chan! Your reviews mean a lot and I hope you all continue to enjoy the story!

Red In The Morning: I'm glad you like the OCs, and thanks for reminding me xD I tried to make sure I wasn't portraying Romano as whiny or total OTT suicidal or anything, I wanted it as realistic as possible and I'm glad I achieved that! I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

Silian Haye: Similarly, I'm glad you like how I wrote Romano's insecurity. I put a lot of thought into it. And I'm glad our OCs didn't put you off! As you might be able to tell already, it'll focus on a different character each time while following one timeline. However, I'm considering maybe writing a spin-off oneshot or something that just shows Romano, but that'll happen after I've finished this.

I hope everyone continues to enjoy this story, I hope more people review, and if you want to know more about any of the siblings just ask and I can elaborate! See you next time for Sardinia's chapter ;D