Dear Mr. and Mrs. Weasley,

It is my supreme regret to inform you of the horrible misdeeds committed by your sons (Frederick Gideon and George Fabian Weasley) this afternoon at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Not only did they disrupt precious class time by setting off their creation in the hallways, they deliberately flouted my authority in front of the assembled students! As their crimes are too numerous to detail in this letter, I have attached a full and separate list of their reprehensible behavior, which will also be placed into their permanent records. Rest assured that had your children not chosen to discontinue their education, this matter would have been swiftly and justifiably attended to, at my personal discretion. Thank you for your time and cooperation.

Sincerely,

Dolores Jane Umbridge

Headmistress of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry

Molly Weasley had never been more stunned. She wasn't sure what surprised her more: that the twins, who'd always kidded about hating school but never seemed to mean it, had dropped out before taking their N.E.W.Ts, or that this outrageous letter had been penned in magenta ink. Crimes, indeed, she huffed to herself. They're just silly pranks; my boys aren't capable of actual crimes!

Sitting at the kitchen table in the Burrow, Molly tried to let this news sink in. But what in the world could have possessed them? Those two know how much NEWT scores mean to future employers! The part of Molly that always bragged about Bill's twelve and Percy's ten O.W.L.'s, and demanded similar results from her other children, wanted to kill the twins for being so reckless.

Another, more accepting, part of her understood how this could have happened. According to Remus, Dolores Umbridge was a nasty piece of work, and the twins were never very good at controlling their tempers. If the rumors she'd heard in Order meetings were even close to being true, the woman was very vile and very dangerous indeed.

This new thought only made her worry more about her younger children – what would life be like for Ron and Ginny now that their brothers had openly defied Umbridge? Would they be subject to more severe punishment because of the twins' behavior? She wouldn't stand for that, and neither should the other teachers! She would have to talk to Minerva, and soon.

Trying not to let her temper flare up at the idea of undue punishment, and that's all it is, she soothed her anxious mind, an idea, Molly glanced down again at the table. By Umbridge's cold, simpering note – really, was a pink envelope ever necessary? – lay a plain, unopened letter that had arrived moments before the first, and through the Floo, of all places. Between trying to complete her daily work and the sudden arrival of Umbridge's letter, she'd completely forgotten about the smaller note.

Turning the letter over, she recognized Minerva's handwriting. Though her grip on the envelope was gentle, the letter trembled with hidden magic. A letter from the Order! Encoded, too; it must be important. Although she wasn't sure why Order letters were suddenly being directed to the Burrow, and not Grimmauld Place, Molly decided to open it anyway; she and Arthur could at least burn it and discuss its contents with the Order at a later time.

With a flick of her wand, she disabled the protective spells easily, leaving nothing but faint traces of magic on the parchment. The letter read:

Molly and Arthur,

I apologize for the letter you are about to receive from our most illustrious Headmistress. No doubt she will have convinced you that your sons have committed the most heinous of crimes. In reality, they simply continued to show off their latest in a series of elaborate pranks. Today's mischief involved the creation of a portable swamp.

Molly laughed delightedly; she could practically hear the professor's crisp voice within the scrawl of her words. Minerva always got rather eloquent when she was angry or irritated. She kept reading:

Suffice it to say that after Umbridge and Filch were unable to remove the muck from the corridor of Barnabas the Barmy, the twins were publicly questioned about the incident, in front of a large number of students. After threatening punishment, Umbridge asked them what they had to say. The gist of their reply was, and I quote: "I think we've outgrown full-time education." Afterwards, they Summoned their brooms from Umbridge's office, mounted them and whisked away into the distance.

She had certainly never heard anything about a portable swamp before. Though, Molly thought with a bit of motherly pride, she'd seen howthe twins could get creative when it came to their inventions; she knew how bright they could be if they just applied themselves! But why had the twins' brooms been in Umbridge's office?

And why on earth did this letter need to be encoded in the first place? Was Umbridge really being that vicious about what went through the post? Molly still had more to read, however, so perhaps the twins' mischief was only a cover for the real letter:

I realize you will be dealing with this matter very soon, and hope that you will keep my advice in mind when discussing this incident with the boys.

The upcoming part of the letter had strong traces of protective wards. This was where the real message lay. Molly read on, more than a little curious; wondering what needed so badly to be concealed:

It really was a brilliant bit of magic. You and Arthur should be proud.

M—

Pocketing Minerva's letter and vowing to keep it forever, Molly laughed and laughed until tears came to her eyes. If the stoic, unflappable Minerva McGonagall held Fred and George's prank in this kind of esteem, it had to be a great bit of magic indeed. She'd actually used the word brilliant. Molly grinned.

Although it wasn't twelve O.W.L.s or five N.E.W.Ts, she couldn't help but be proud of the twins. Fred and George, for all their mischief, had good hearts. They always knew when to back down and when to toe the line. Molly was willing to credit that their reasons for leaving school had to be reasoned and well-thought, considering that they were ready to risk Umbridge's wrath (and her own!) in order to leave.

Hearing the telltale cracks of Apparition in the yard, she braced herself for a serious discussion. There was a lesson in all of this, somewhere, but Molly resolved that she would try to be a little lenient with the twins, just this once. In times like these, especially now that more Death Eaters were on the loose, it was important not to stress over little things.

Fred was first inside the door, looking like he was about to face a firing squad. Molly couldn't blame him for looking scared; if past words were anything to go by, they would not be looking forward to this talk. Before his seventh year, Charlie had wanted to drop out of Hogwarts to take a magi-zoology internship in Romania, but Molly had thrown an absolute fit and refused to let him. Specifically, she'd threatened death and dismemberment to any Weasley who dropped out before taking their N.E.W.Ts. She'd yelled for a solid five minutes; poor Charlie had never stood a chance. Though the twins were fairly young at the time, there was no way they could have forgotten that argument. Molly sighed loudly. So how would she now explain her leniency?

"Mum?" George was next, sticking his head around the open door and creeping in as if he were a lost Kneazle kitten.

"Oh, George! Fred!" The words of both letters flashed through her mind as Molly rushed over to her sons, embracing them in a bear hug. "I can't believe it – the letter just arrived -- I'm just glad you're all right!"

"Bloody hell, Mum," Fred burst out, shocked, "Why aren't you furious? You're sure you're not a Death Eater in disguise? Should we be asking you a security question?"

"Oh, don't be silly, Fred! And watch that language!" Molly chided, releasing them. "Can't a mother be allowed to hug her sons once in awhile?"

"We thought you were going to murder us!" George crowed, beginning to look a little more confident. "This is a relief, innit, Fred?"

"No joke!" Fred chimed in, sitting down at the table and running a hand through his hair. "We kept remembering how you chewed out Charlie when he didn't want to go back for N.E.W.Ts, but, blimey, this is a piece of cake in comparison! We could have left sooner if we'd known you'd let us off the hook!"

"But then we wouldn't have gotten to test the swamp," George argued, taking a seat across from his twin. "Though I am surprised at you, Mum; I always thought you couldn't resist a good bit of yelling."

Despite wanting to keep her earlier promise of leniency, Molly did want to yell now, just a little. After all, the boys had to learn the consequences of their actions. If Fred and George were planning to be full-fledged businessmen, even businessmen in a joke shop, they had to understand the value of responsibility and commitment. Even if she had to present her lesson in a fit of temper, something good would at least be gained.

"Well, Mum," Fred looked inquisitively at her. "What d'you have to say?"

Molly took a deep breath. This had to be good.

"JUST WHAT, EXACTLY, WERE YOU TWO THINKING?!?!"