Summary: Years passed since Chihiro saved her parents, her journey to the spirit world but a faded memory. Belief turned into hope, then denial, and finally memories. The promise Haku made was forgotten. But Chihiro wasn't the one who forgot. A cruel twist of fate would bring them together again, but when Haku doesn't remember her, its up to Chihiro to solve the mystery.

Author's Note: Thank you to everyone who has read this, and to those few who have reviewed it. I am very thankful to see that so many have taken interest in this. And its very uplifting to see. For this chapter I decided to do it in Chihiro's point of view, and yes, it was intended to mirror Haku's story in both format and even in some ways the writing. I hope you enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Spirited Away or any of the characters!


It was cold out. It was desolate and unforgiving, a bitter chill in the wind as it flew by. And yet… it was as balmy as it ever was in the springtime. Despite the warm temperatures, the delectable warm breeze floating by innocently, it was cold. This season was supposed to be about life and rebirthing, new chances and fresh starts. New life bloomed from a dead ground, dead grass turning green again with renewed vigor and flowers blossoming into unfathomable beauty. Yet, in the warmth of the season of life, there was nothing but bitterness and hate wrapped up in her tiny, frail body. It hadn't started off this way, she had welcomed the change of the season and all that it had to offer. Warm winds, new life, and days outside basking in the sun at the park were calling her name in sweet whispered winds against her cheek. But time had a way of changing things. Time was cruel. And as the wind played with her ponytail, solemn eyes cast down to the freshly turned earth, she couldn't help but feel… cold.

Night had fallen on the land, the moon raising high in the air and easing the sun into a sweet slumber. Deep reds and oranges turned into dark hues of purple and blue, until finally the sky was a navy sea stretching as far as your imagination reached. Little twinkling lights littered the sea like heartbeats, raining light into the darkened world, a comforting nod of security in the vast uncertainty. It was dark, but no place could be safer, the world wrapped in the sweet gleam of moonlight. Serene… tranquil… peaceful.

She wasn't born this way, cold and frightened. She couldn't have been! Life hadn't always been so cruel, it couldn't. But it seemed that the years that had been so kind to her were, filled with happy memories and moments of unbridled joy, were overshadowed by the events of the past few days. Years or normalcy, a comfortable routine and familiar faces, were lost in a blur of current events, desperately trying to swim back to the forefront of her mind and ease the sadness. Yet there was no life glittering in her eyes, no laughter in her smile, no happiness in her that once was so prominent. Just an empty shell, a shadow of who she once was.

The sweet symphony of crickets bubbled to life when the sun was finally resting. Their quiet little chirps like a lullaby for nature, dulcet and comforting. Even the birds, so anxious to sing sweet melodies in the glory of the sun, had nestled down to sleep, and took comfort in the lonely song of the crickets. Nights like this were so common that they were taken for granted, inhabitants of the world ignoring the symphony playing so sweetly in the background. But it didn't fall upon deaf ears—not tonight.

It was heart breaking. Each day was a new battle for her to face, more hardships and despair. Slowly the pressure was weighing her down and she didn't know if she could remain on her own two feet for much longer. Her knees threatened to buckle, her resolve crumbling, tears slowly passing by her defenses and burning lines down her rosy cheeks. It wasn't supposed to be this way. It wasn't fair. But when was life ever fair? Her grip on life had loosened, her position in the world shaken. She was lost, hopeless and lonely… a wandering soul.

There was something she had come here to do, a mission. She had been determined; there was no stopping her or changing her mind. Yet, as the symphony of wildlife caressed her ears, he could only feel the growing hollow feeling in her stomach begin to take over. He could be dying… and she was just sitting there doing nothing. He could be dying…

The sound of laughter and faded smiles took over, an echo of who she once was just days ago. So carefree and innocent, naïve to what was about to change her life. She remembered mocking a teacher with a close friend of hers as they walked home from school, simple little gestures sending both of them into uncontrollable fits of laughter. They had talked about how they feared their latest test had gone, giggled at how nonchalant the other was about the inevitable failing grade they would receive, because really, neither of them were that great of scholars. With a wave she would bid her friend goodbye, finishing the last of the trip to the tiny blue house in a slow paced jog. The memory was so fresh in her mind she could almost hear her friend's laughter tickling her mind, the hint of a smile fighting its way to her lips. But the memory faded… sirens and flashing lights blinding her… leaving her hollow…

Wind, stronger than any she had ever felt, overcame the small cottage. It seemed they had been expecting company, but who she could only guess… only hope. Her heart raced with anticipation as her unpracticed fingers worked with the door, pulling open the shuttering barrier and opening the small cottage to the night. Her breath caught in her throat and she swore she could fly. He was alive.

Who was she? She almost didn't care. Her name was Chihiro Ogino. She was 17 years old. She was a loving daughter and a loyal friend. She wasn't the most graceful person, or the smartest, but her heart was true and strong. Who was she? She was Chihiro Ogino… orphaned and alone. Her parents were gone, along with her heart, and she had nowhere else to go. Who was she? She was Chihiro Ogino… lost and confused. Dark eyes stared at the fresh mounds of earth, weak fingers clutching a bouquet of roses. A bitter thought crossed her mind, but she shrugged it off as she knelt down, gently placing the flowers over their respective graves. It had been her first bouquet… and it was a goodbye present. That was depressing. But she never imagined this. Today, these flowers, this bouquet, wasn't for her.

The wind against her face was foreign, the feeling of flight both exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. Never could she have imagined this in her life, her mind unable to fathom that it was happening—convinced she was dreaming. She once was afraid of everything, a nervous child who could barely stand on her own two feet. Yet here she was, soaring in the sky, feeling so comfortable… it was eerily familiar.

Standing up, her hands smoothing out the fabric of her black skirt, a sparkling on her wrist caught her attention. Slowly the frown that formed on her lips days ago turned into a small and fond smile, her opposite hand gently wringing her wrist and pulling the worn band from its resting place. It was all she had left of that life, a life she would be convinced was a dream had it not been for the glittering purple band. The proof she had that those far off memories, buried deep away and out of sight, were true and real. It had once been used to keep her hair up and out of her face, a constant reminder of her the spirit world, of who she was. But days turned to weeks, and weeks to months, months to years… and slowly it became a worn out bracelet on its last legs of life. She had forgotten about it—almost. But it, her friends, where always there for her when she needed them most… and she needed them now.

"Haku listen. I just remembered something from a long time ago, I think it may help you. Once, when I was little, I dropped my shoe into a river. When I tried to get it back I fell in. I thought I'd drown but the water carried me to shore. It finally came back to me. The river's name was the Kohaku River. I think that was you, and your real name is Kohaku River!"

Slowly she examined the glittering band, moving it purposely to catch the light. With an airy laugh, reminiscent of a soft sigh, she began to gather her long hair in her hands. Tears were falling freely from her eyes, but she no longer cared about her broken resolve and swallowing back the lump in her throat that made it harder and harder to breathe. Tying the loose hair band around her hair, the fabric loose and threatening to give way, and she felt immediately comforted. This was who she was… who she had been. She had been strong and independent. She was respectable and reliable, a loyal and selfless friend. She was a hard worker, a determined spirit. Not some broken, hollow, wandering soul. She could only imagine how her friends would look at her now—mourning over the loss of her parents. She had lost them once before, though not quite in such a final way such as death. They wouldn't be happy with her—how she gave up so easily. She needed to be stronger… to persevere through it. She needed to be that little girl…

Realization sunk in and time seemed to stop. Fear stilled her beating heart in her chest as she felt Haku stiffen, and his scales began to vanish. In seconds they were free falling… nothing to stop them from plummeting to the ground, to ease their descent. And yet, as the air was sucked from her lungs, the fear of death did not claim her any longer. Tears had formed in her eyes, unable to tear them away from Haku. She had done it… something worthwhile, something important. She saved him.

It hadn't been a split second decision to go back. It had taken painstakingly long hours for her mind to wrap around the consequences of what she was doing. But she needed this now, it was all she could focus on, all she could think about. The Spirit World was the only place she felt like herself, where she could be herself. Where she wouldn't have to face nameless and faceless people who pretended to pity her for her loss. Who tried to be sympathetic and relate with her on how she must feel. She didn't need reassurance that it would be okay—because it never would be. The wound might heal over, but the scar would forever exist, permanently etched on her skin like a tattoo. Right now she didn't need what was offered to her, fake hugs and pity pats on the shoulder. She needed her friends, but most of all… she needed to be herself. To find herself again. She was going back, and there was no changing her mind. She just had to say goodbye… one… final… time.

"You did it Chihiro! I remember! I was the Spirit of the Kohaku River!"

It was just how she remembered it, the little stone houses, the long winding road to the eerily smiling stone, the dark and foreboding tunnel. But she wasn't nervous or afraid as she had been the first time. Her heart was heavy in her chest, thumping anxiously against her ribs as she stood at the mouth of the tunnel. Gently her hand caressed the side, her fingertips gently running over a large crack in the wall. Silently, her heart ached, seeing in front of her eyes what no doubt she looked like on the inside. Broken… dilapidated… It had gotten older, seemed more run down than she remembered, but that was only to be expected. The wind, so calm and so gentle, blew by her calling out to her eagerly, trying to lead her into its murky depths. Just like before. This time though. She didn't have her mother to cling to, and a stray tear fell from her eyes. But she couldn't dwell on this forever. She had to be strong… had to be brave. And just like the moment when she left and promised Haku, there was no looking back. Forward was the only direction to go now.

"That must be the reason I can't find my way home, Chihiro, I remember you falling into the river, and I remember your little pink shoe!"

This time would be different. She knew the inner workings of this world now, and knew no to fall into the traps, and to find food soon before she faded away. It was sunset when she finally arrived at the bridge, and she knew that most workers were still asleep, dreading when they would be woken up for work. Yet a lone figure stood before her, awake and very much aware. She had promised herself she wouldn't cry here. That the life she left behind would not haunt her in this new home. Yet her untrained mask fell and her resolve crumbled as tears bubbled to the surface at the site of him. His face, his body, she could barely recognize him. But she knew, deep in her broken heart, who he was. Words escaped her, left her breathless as she watched him cross the bridge. He remembered her… he had forgotten his promise, but he remembered her! For the first time in what felt like innumerable days, she felt like smiling… like the world wasn't about to crumble beneath her feet and swallow her up and out of existence. But that happiness, the breathless laugh that escaped her lips when he was a fraction of an inch from her, was short lived. Pain shot threw her arm at his grip. Fear claimed her broken heart and she looked into his cold, bitter eyes so full of hate and contempt for her. "Your kind isn't welcomed here… Human!" What little of her heart that hadn't broken shattered, and all Chihiro could do was stare in disbelief, sinking to her knees in overwhelming defeat. He didn't remember… she really was just a wandering, lost little soul.

"So you're the one who carried me back to shallow water… you saved me. I knew you were good!"