AN: Reread the story and didn't like it, so I revised it. Enjoy!
Ryan: This week on Buzzfeed Unsolved we are going to talk about the murders of Preston and Priscilla Northwest. This case has it all!
Shane: Does it?
Ryan: Oh yeah. It's got murder, it's got mystery, revenge, vigilantism, stalking, Halloween-
Shane: Oooohhh….
Ryan: Yeah, the holdiay of evil. But I'm not done.
Shane: No?
Ryan: It's got abuse, family drama, police cover-ups, possible paranormal activity-
Shane: Aw…
Ryan: What do you mean "aw?"
Shane: I was excited until you said"possible paranormal activity."
Ryan: Oh my-y'know what, let's just get into it.
Shane: Oh yes, lets.
Ryan: You're such a jerk.
Ryan, Narrator Voice: It's October 31st, Halloween, at the Super 8 Motel in the small town of Gravity Falls, Oregon. Samara Langston, a maid at the hotel, was sent to check on the clients staying in Room 13: Preston and Priscilla Northwest. The Northwests were supposed to have checked out of their room at 11 a.m. that morning. However, they had not come down to the lobby to turn in their keys, and had not even been seen since early the night before. Samara knocked on the door, saying she was there to remind them that it was time for them to check out. When there was no answer, she opened the door and found Priscilla and Preston lying side by side, in the floor between the two full sized beds in the room, dead.
Shane: Wait, she only knocked once before heading in?
Ryan: Yeah.
Shane: Odd…
Ryan: How is that odd?
Shane: Don't you maybe knock twice? Three times maybe?
Ryan: That doesn't-
Shane: Y'know, maybe they were having sex-
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: -maybe they needed time to throw on some under-roos. She could have walked in on them naked!
Ryan: Well, she walked in on them dead. Which is arguably worse.
Shane: Arguably? What's arguable about it? They're dead!
Ryan: Wha-wha-wha! You're the one who just went on a tirade about walking in on them shacking up!
Shane: I'm just saying, it's odd she only knocked once.
Ryan: Uh-huh, sure.
Shane: In my mind most people would knock more than once before just stumbling in there. Unless! Unless, she knew what she was stumbling upon…
Ryan: I see where you're going with this, but hold that thought, because, as you'll soon see, there is no shortage of suspects in this.
Shane: Oooh!
Ryan, narrator voice: Before we go much further into the murders, let's establish who Preston and Priscilla Northwest were. The Northwest family was once the richest and most powerful family in Gravity Falls, Oregon. This is largely due to the fact that they were believed to be the descendants of the town founders, though that was revealed a little over a decade before the murders that this was, in fact a hoax.
Shane: They lied about being the descendants of the founders?
Ryan: Yeah.
Shane: Why lie about that?
Ryan: Money.
Shane: Wha-no. That's like a cheesy Saturday Morning cartoon villain motivation.
Ryan: Well, the more you find out about these folks, the more you realize that these two...they, they were characters. And I mean that in the worst way possible.
Shane: Oooh.
Ryan, narrator voice: Preston, and his wife Priscilla, were the current holders of the Northwest family fortune when the scam was revealed. During the investigation, it was discovered that the Northwests were also allegedly guilty of the following crimes: Embezzlement, Tax Evasion, Bribery, Forgery, and Counterfitting. However, they were never tried for any of these crimes and managed to hold onto a good portion of their wealth.
Shane: Wait, what? Someone conducted an investigation on these guys for, essentially scamming the whole town, busted them for a lot of other money related crime thingies-
Ryan: *wheeze* "Crime Thingies?"
Shane: And no one tried them?
Ryan: Nope.
Shane: How does that happen?
Ryan: I don't know, but I guess it was because they were just that powerful in this town.
Shane: Wha-
Ryan: Even after they were busted for the scam, they were still the richest family in town. And, I'm assuming from what I know about them, they were a bit intimidating, so I guess everyone was just too scared to charge them.
Shane: Hmmm….
Ryan: What are you thinking?
Shane: I don't like these people.
Ryan: Just wait. It gets worse.
Shane: Ergh….
Ryan, narrator voice: Despite surviving the scandal relatively unscathed, Priscilla and Preston were said to be bitter about the little money they had lost, and began plotting on how to regain it. They finally decided that the best way to regain their fortune would be to marry their daughter off the Zachary Stonebeau, the heir of the Stonebeau family, a wealthy family that lived a few towns over, in the same county.
Shane: Wait, just marry their daughter off? That's how they are going to recover from a scandal?
Ryan: Yeah.
Shane: That's like something you did in the 1700's.
Ryan: Yeah, it is a bit of a weird plan.
Shane: Kind of...I don't know, it just sounds slimy.
Ryan: Slimy?
Shane: Yeah, you know. Just...creepy. Bad. Not good. I don't know, I don't like this plan Ryan!
Ryan: Yeah, well, neither did the daughter.
Ryan, narrator voice: Preston and Priscilla's daughter, Pacifica, was not told about the arrangement until she was proposed to, on the same night she met Zachary.
Shane: These people!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: What...what...how is this going to work?
Ryan: *laugh*
Shane: Oh, no! We lost a good portion of our fortune due to scandal! Um...promise our daughter's hand to a rich boy, but don't tell her until she meets the guy and he pops the question two seconds later!
Ryan: *Wheeze*
Shane: What could possibly go wrong!
Ryan, narrator voice: Pacifica was understandably upset, but Preston and Priscilla were insistant she marry Zachary. So insistant that, when she said no, Preston allegedly attacked her, bloodying her face, and locking her in her room so no one would see that she was injured. Pacifica would later say that this was not an uncommon occurence, and that her parents were often physically and verbally abusive with her. Her allegations include: burning her with cigars, beating her until she blacked out, depriving her of food when she, quote "got too chubby," and locking her away in her room for days on end. The abuse was so bad that her parents had psychologically conditioned her to obey a bell that they kept on their person. Candy Chu, a school mate of Pacifica, described to bell conditioning as quote: "It was spooky. She would be her normal, cheery self, then she'd hear a bell and go immediately quiet. She looked like a puppy that just got kicked. It was so sad." End quote.
Shane: Screw these guys!
Ryan: Yeah, those were basically my thoughts as well.
Ryan, narrator voice: After being told she had no choice but to marry Zachary Stonebeau, Pacifica decided it was time to take her life into her own hands. Later that night she would sneak out her room to ask for help the Pines family, a family of paranormal investigators whom Pacifica was close to.
Shane: Ugh!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: I see why you chose this case now.
Ryan: *laugh*
Shane: They're crazy people like you.
Ryan, narrator voice: She found the family at The Mystery Shack, a local tourist trap that was founded by family patriarch, Stanley Pines, though at the time of these events, the shack was under the management of Jesus Ramirez's, a close friend to the Pines.
Shane: *wheeze* Paranormal investigators with a tourist trap!
Ryan: What's wrong with that.
Shane: Nothing, I suppose, but it just...these people
Ryan: They sound like fun to me.
Shane: Oh, I'm sure they do!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: I'm sure you and these folks would just have a blast hunting ghosts with holy water guns and salt packets!
Ryan: *wheeze louder*
Shane: Have little ghost parties. You'd have a blast with these guys!
Ryan, narrator voice: When Pacifica arrived at the Mystery Shack, the following people were at the shop: Stanley Pines, Stanley's twin brother, Stanford, their great niece and nephew, Mabel and Mason, often called "Dipper," Jesus Ramiriez, Jesus' fiance, Melody, Jesus' grandmother. No one is quite sure what happened at the Mystery Shack, but what is clear, is that an escape plan was hatched. A few days later, Pacifica would take some cash, her I.D.'s, medical files, and a few changes of clothes. She would then meet up with Stanley, Stanford, and Dipper at a local diner, and then left town aboard Stanley and Stanford's house boat. She would spend the next three years living on this house boat with the Pines, working as a paranormal investigator.
Shane: Wait, what about the sister?
Ryan: She was not a part of this team.
Shane: You said the whole family were paranormal investigators.
Ryan: No, I said most-
Shane: You said "a family of paranormal investigators" that means the sister was too!
Ryan: No, I didn't mean-
Shane: So what does the sister do?
Ryan: She designs children's clothing, toys, and school supplies.
Shane: What!?
Ryan: Yeah, she makes stuff for kids.
Shane: Uh…
Ryan: Also, Stanford, the great-uncle who did not own the tourist trap, he made a little extra money on the side designing computer programs and equipment.
Shane: This had got the be the oddest, artsy-est, most off the wall family ever!
Ryan, narrator voice: Pacifica tried to quietly cut ties with her parents, allegedly telling them over the phone to quote "...just this once, I'm asking you to do me a favor. Let me go. Don't look for me. Don't call me. I'm not coming back. I'm happy where I am. Just leave me be," end quote. However, Preston and Priscilla kept harrassing her, trying to convince her to come back. They even went so far as to burn all of her childhood belongings in a bomb fire on their front lawn, and sent Zachary Stonebeau all the way to Japan to attack Pacifica and Dipper, whom she began dating a few months after her escape. Eventually, Pacifica had no choice but to file charges. Both Preston and Priscilla were later found guilty of several charges, including child abuse. Preston received 25 year, and Priscilla 15, but that did not stop them from harrassing their daughter.
Shane: From jail!?
Ryan: Yeah.
Shane: That's crazy!
Ryan: Yeah, you would think being thrown in jail would, I don't know, make these guys rethink a few things.
Shane: Right!
Ryan: But, no, they just keep doing what they do.
Shane: Yeah, I just...these guys...these guys are special.
Ryan: Spec-*wheeze*
Shane: And not in the good way.
Ryan, narrator voice: After only spending 2 years in jail, Preston bribed two men, George Shaw and Ben Shirar to stalk Pacifica and Dipper, who she had then married. This began a terrifying two month campaign of harrassment, that included unsolicited gifts, threats, and the distribution of private pictures of Pacifica, hacking into Dipper's private social media messages, and an attempt to, attack, taze, beat, and dump Dipper in the woods. All this was going on while Pacifica was pregnant with hers and Dipper's first child. Preston would be caught, and banned from Gravity Falls for life. None-the-less, five years later both Priscilla and Preston would be relased on parole, and would begin harrassing Pacifica again-
Shane: Oh my gosh!
Ryan: *nervous chuckle* I know, right?
Shane: I mean, admire their persistance I suppose.
Ryan: Wha-no! No, no you don't admire someone for harrassing and abusing their daughter. And scamming a whole town. And stealing who knows however many thousands of-
Shane: I'm just saying, they've got some nerve.
Ryan: That they do.
Shane: Indeed. Also, how did they get out on parole after-
Ryan: Yeah, that struck me as odd too.
Shane: These people just seem to be weaselling their way out of every consequence that they should be getting for their horrible, horrible actions, and then do nothing to change the behaviors that landed them in the situation they just had to weasel their way out of.
Ryan: Yeah, clearly these people had some sort of, I don't know, smarts? Charisma? Quite a lot of nerve. And if they had, y'know, just devoted a portion of the time they spent going after Pacifica to, I don't know, maybe getting a job? Attending a counselling program? Something, maybe they wouldn't have turned up dead on Halloween.
Shane: Yeah, well, that's karma for you.
Ryan, narrator voice: Preston and Priscilla began spreading rumors that Pacifica was cheating on Dipper and that none of their children were his in an attempt to destroy their marriage. They even went as far as the bring the couple of the Maury Show-
Shane: They what?
Ryan: I'm not even kidding, you can look up the episode, that happened.
Shane: *wheeze*
Ryan: Not even kidding.
Ryan, narrator voice: This appearance on Maury would ultimately prove that the children were Dipper's, and that Pacifica had been faithful. Still, that did not stop Preston and Priscilla.
Shane: What else can these people do?
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: They abused her as a child, they hired guys to stalk her while pregnant, they tried to humiliate her and destroy her marriage on national tv.
Ryan: Well-
Shane: Where do you go from there?
Ryan: Glad you asked.
Shane: I have a feeling I won't be...
Ryan, narrator voice:Three months after the Maury Show Priscilla, who had not banned from Gravity Falls, allegedly attempted to abduct Dipper and Pacifica's three year old daughter, Bambi.
Shane: Holy-what!
Ryan: Yeah, there is seemingly no length these people will not go to in order to get back at their daughter for, I don't know, leaving and going off on her own like most young people do?
Shane: How dare you not marry the man we picked out for you without ever telling you!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: Now we'll, stalk you, try to ruin your marriage, and steal your children!
Ryan, narrator voice: Bambi would somehow escape, and would be picked up by Gravity Falls resident, Gideon Gleeful, who found her wandering around in the highway on his way home from work. Though Bambi would testify that it was indeed Priscilla who kidnapped her, there was not enough evidence to convict her. Amazingly, this would not the last time Priscilla would allegedly attempt to kidnap Pacifica's children. Five months later, Pacifica would give birth to twin girls: Eden and Gemma. The day they were born, Dipper caught Priscilla trying to break into the nursery, dressed in a halloween nurse costume.
Shane: *wheeze* A Halloween costume!
Ryan: *laugh*
Shane: She-she-She tried it!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: Ladies and gentlemen, she tried it!
Ryan: Yeah, that's pretty, that's pretty...I don't even know, it's pretty something.
Shane: Don't mind me. I'm just a convicted child abuser sneaking into a baby nursery dressed as a naughty nurse stripper!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: Nothing to see here! This is totally normal! Nothing sinister going on here!
Ryan, narrator voice: After this last incident, Pacifica, Dipper, and their six children temporarily moved into Standford and Stanley's house boat, which they anchored at an undisclosed location in an attempt to hide from Preston and Priscilla until they could come up with a plan on what to do about Preston and Priscilla. The day after they left on the house boat, Preston snuck into the town with Priscilla's help, and the two checked into the local Super 8 Motel. The next morning, they were found dead. Now, let's take a look at the details of the murders:
As stated before, the bodies of both Preston and Priscilla were lying on the floor, in between the two beds in the room. However, and autopsy would reveal that there had been no stuggle before the deaths, and that the two had been killed by a single shot to the back of the head, most likely, while they were asleep. Investigators would determine someone, at some point in the night, broke into the room and shot them both in the back of the head. They then moved the bodies into the floor, lying them side by side-
Shane: Wait, why move them?
Ryan: Hold on, I'm getting there.
Shane: Oh…
Ryan, narrator voice: Despite this theory, the mattress in the room were not damaged. This is odd, because if Preston and Priscilla had been shot while asleep there should have been gunshot damage or blood stains on the mattresses. Upon closer investigation, though, investigators would discover that the mattresses found in the room with the bodies were of a different brand than any of the other mattresses in the motel, suggesting that whoever killed Preston and Priscilla took the mattresses and then replaced them with new ones-
Shane: What!?*wheeze* They just-*wheeze* They just dumped them in the floor, stole the mattresses, and went shopping at Mattress King?
Ryan: I know, it's ridiculous!
Shane: I don't know who these murderers are-
Ryan: No one does, hence why it's unsolved.
Shane: Well, whoever you are, sir or ma'am. I salute you. Taking the mattresses, that is…
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: That is a new level of efficiency.
Ryan, narrator voice: Outside of the mattresses being replaced, the entire room had been disinfected, ridding it of any fingerprints, DNA, or blood spatters. The only piece of forensic evidence found was a single hair with a partial DNA sample. Remember that, because it will come back into play later.
Shane: This killer-
Ryan: I know, right?
Shane: This killer is a pro! Got rid of the blood, the finger prints, the DNA, the freaking mattresses!
Ryan: Only one small, partially damaged, DNA sample.
Shane: Which obviously didn't lead to anything because it's still unsolved.
Ryan: Well…
Shane: Or did it?
Ryan: Just wait.
Shane: Huh?
Ryan: It does, but it doesn't.
Shane: Well, what's that supposed to mean?
Ryan: Just wait.
Ryan, narrator voice: Despite the lack of forensic evidence, several theories have been speculated as to who killed the Northwests. So now, let's look at the theories, but strap in, because there's a lot of them.
Shane: Ooh!
Ryan, narrator voice: The first, and most popular suspect, is Stanley Pines, the Great Uncle of Dipper, Pacifica's husband. Stanley already had an exstensive criminal record at the time of the murders: including fraud, general indecency, theft, and impersonation. He had been in jail at least eight times before Preston and Priscilla were killed. None-the-less he was described as being a very loving and protective uncle, who would do anything for his family. Given his track-record and his loyalty to his family, it is not hard to imagine that he would have been the one to take out Preston and Priscilla to protect Dipper, Pacifica, and his children. Furthermore, Stanley did not exactly have the best aliby. As stated earlier, the Pines family all hid on the family house boat after Priscilla tried to kidnap Gemma and Eden from the hospital. The night of the muders, Stanley was seen leaving the house boat at about 10:00 p.m. Stanley claimed he went to buy groceries, and he was caught on camera at a local supermarket from about 10:15-10:35. However, Stanley did not return to the houseboat until 12:08 a.m.
Shane: Yeah. Sounds good to me.
Ryan: Really?
Shane: Yeah, I mean, he's already been to jail eight times. So it's not like he's got a squeaky clean record or reputation to upkeep. He's missing for about an hour and a half the night of the murders.
Ryan: True.
Shane: Also, these guys are a legitimate danger to his family so, yeah, shoot 'em in the face.
Ryan: *wheeze*
Ryan, narrator voice: In addition to Stan's background, and the fact that he was missing from 10:35-12:08, the piece of hair found at the crime scene gave a partial DNA profile: a profile that is hereditary amongst the Pines family. However, that does not mean that Stan was the Pines the hair came from. Furthermore, though the Pines family does have this DNA strain throughout their family, it is not exclusive to them.
Shane: So, the hair could have come from him...
Ryan: It's very likely it could have. Or it could have also come from one of the other Pines.
Shane: Hmmm….
Ryan: Also, even though this is a strand of DNA that all the members of the Pines family has, they aren't the only ones with it. So it's possible it could have not been a Pines at all that the hair came from.
Shane: Yeah, but given the circumstances…
Ryan: Oh, I agree. I'm just saying, it's not an air tight piece of evidence.
Shane: Gotcha.
Ryan, narrator voice: Furthermore, Stanley was known as being a bit of a buffoon, who probably wouldn't have had the insight or know-how to get rid of the mattresses and disinfect the room. He also could become very violent when angry, allegedly beating a man until both his arms and five of his ribs broke for peaking in on Mabel while she was bathing. Stanford, Dipper, Mabel, and Pacifica all stated during police investigations that Stanley had been in a bad mood that day. Mabel even stated that, quote "He was fuming inside. Grunkle Stan takes it upon himself to be the protector of our family, so the fact that Priscilla was able to get that close to Gemma and Eden before getting caught, especially after she'd already taken Bambi, it was like a slap in the face to him," end quote. Therefore, it is unlikely that he would have opted for a simple, quick, and painless death when taking out the Northwests. Furthermore, though Stanley was not caught of film for approximately an hour and a half the night of the murders, he did have an aliby for the missing time. He claimed that he had been at the Mystery Shack, talking to Jesus Ramirez. Jesus would back-up this claim, but when the two were questioned about what they had talked about, they both claimed that they couldn't remember due to the fact that they had been drinking, leading many to believe that Jesus was simply covering for Stanley. Still, when investigators went to the Mystery Shack they found several empty cans of beer in the trash can, seemingly confirming the alibi.
Shane: Eh, they could have just dumped out a bunch of cans and thrown them out.
Ryan: You think they would have thought to-
Shane: THEY GOT RID OF THE MATTRESSES!
Ryan: You are really fixated on that, aren't you?
Shane: Who wouldn't be?
Ryan: I guess you're right though. Someone who would have enough foresight to get rid of the mattresses would probably make sure there were empty beer cans to back up their story. Although that is a waste of a lot of beer.
Shane: Yeah, it kind of is.
Ryan: Sad.
Ryan, narrator voice: This brings us to our second suspect, Standford Pines, Stanley's twin brother. Standford was a bit of genius. He had twelve degress, was a world renowned researcher, and had invented several scientific machines. Though he was not normally known to be violent, everyone who knew him stated that Standford was skilled with a gun and, like his brother, fiercely protective of his family. Given his intelligence and skills, Standford would likely be thorough enough in his clean up to get rid of the mattresses and leave no evidence behind outside of the hair. However, he was known to be a bit of a goody-two-shoes, and tried his best to play by the rules, unlike his brother. Therefore, it seems a bit out of character that Standford would all of a sudden shoot two people in cold blood.
Furthermore, Stanford had a fairly good aliby. Stanford claimed to have been on the yatch with Dipper and Pacifica, to help keep guard and make sure that no one came snooping around. This would later be cooberated by Dipper and Pacifica. However, it is worth noting that security cameras had been installed on the yatch, and there is about an hour of footage where Stanford is nowhere to be found, the hour between 11:00 p.m. and 12:00 a.m. This is a very short window of time to commit a murder and clean up the scale of the one of the Northwests, though Also, there is a "blind spot" on the yatch, near the bow, which would be the ideal position to keep look out, which is what Stanford claimed to be doing.
Shane: So, he could have been killing his inlaws during that missing hour.
Ryan: Could have been, but that's not much time to kill Preston and Priscilla, clean up the crime scene, replace the mattresses, and get back on board the ship...
Shane: True.
Ryan: Also, how would he have snuck on and off without being spotted by any of the cameras?
Shane: Or...or-
Ryan: What?
Shane: Stan-ley? Is that the violent one?
Ryan: *wheeze* The violent one?
Shane: Yeah, the not smart one.
Ryan: Yeah, Stanley.
Shane: Stanley killed them, called his brother to tell him what he did, and then Stanfrod came and helped him clean up.
Ryan: Eh, could be. Could be.
Shane: Ryan, I think I did it. I think I solved it.
Ryan: Wait, wait, there's still more theories to go through.
Ryan, narrator voice: The third theory is that Dipper was the ones who killed Priscilla and Preston. After all, Pacifica, his wife, and their children were the primary victims of Priscilla and Preston's actions. Dipper was usually discovered as a kind and loving man, but could become violent when angry, especially when his family was threatened, similar to his great uncle, Stanley. An investiagtion into this theory would uncover a series of messages between Dipper and Preston, stating quote:
"Dipper: I don't know what you hope to accomplish, but if you don't stop now I'll force you to.
Preston: How are you going to do that, boy? Kill me?
Dipper: Yes!
Preston: Sure, whatever.
Dipper: Don't underestimate me! You hurt one hair on my wife or children's head I WILL murder you!" end quote.
Shane: That's...that is pretty incriminating.
Ryan: I mean, can you blame him though?
Shane: No. Honestly, I'd probably do the same thing.
Ryan: Yeah, I probably would too.
Ryan, narrator voice: However, video footage confirm that Dipper spent the night of the murder on board the yatch. There was a period of about 8 hours when Dipper was not filmed, however, both he and Pacifica would claim to be sleeping below deck. Video footage confirmed that the two went below deck, walked down the hall, and went into the bedroom at about 10:15 p.m. They would emerge 8 hours later, at about 6:00 a.m. Though some people theorize Dipper could have snuck out the porthole in the bedroom to murder the Northwests, but this seems unlikely as he would have had to have squeezed through a tiny hole, swimming to shore, and could have flooded the whole yatch in doing so.
Shane: *wheeze*
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: Just squeeze through the porthole. Okie-dokie!
Ryan: Laugh.
Shane: Because…that's the natural course of action one would take when going to commit a murder.
Ryan, narrator voice: The fourth theory is that is was Pacifica herself who killed her parents, although, same as Dipper, she was filmed being on the yatch the night of the murder, making it unlikely she could have snuck out the commit the murders. Furthermore, several of Pacifica's friends testified that she was terrified of her parents. Family friend Wendy Corduroy was recorded in an interview covering the case saying, quote: "Pazzy was terrified by them. She would shudder just at the thought of them. There is no way she would have had it in her to kill them. She was too afraid."
Shane: That's just sad.
Ryan: How so?
Shane: That she had to live with being that scared of these people for so long.
Ryan: Yeah, it really is. And it's a shame because she did everything right, and none of it worked. They still came after her. Which, well, hold on.
Shane: What?
Ryan: Maybe that's why she did do it, if she did.
Shane: Because nothing worked?
Ryan: Because she was so desperate to just be rid of them I guess she just thought "screw it."
Shane: Yeah, I'd bet jail would be relief for her because, at least they wouldn't get to her in jail.
Ryan: Man, that's dark.
Shane: What are you talking about, this whole story is dark.
Ryan: That's true.
Ryan, narrator voice: The fifth theory is that it was Mabel, Dipper's sister, who killed the Northwests. Unlike the other theories though, Mabel is not the one who pulled the trigger. Mabel, like the rest of her family, was on board the house boat the night of the murders, and was caught on security camera footage continually from 9:30 p.m. until about 3:00 a.m in the living area of the boat house. At first the footage appears normal as she's seen watching television, or reading, then at about 10:30 p.m. she gets calls someone on her phone, and begins pacing. She then continues to text, call, and pace until 3:00 a.m. when she finally goes to bed. This has lead many to believe that Mabel hired a hitman to take out the Northwests, and was communicating with them throughout the night. Oddly enough, the next morning, Mabel would "accindently" drop her phone into the lake, claiming she left it on the deck railing and then bumped it with her elbow, therefore making it impossible for investigators to look through he texts and calls.
Shane: Mabel!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: I knew it was you, Mabel.
Ryan: Yeah, I actually really like this theory.
Shane: I do to.
Ryan: Because, of everyone involved in this crime, she so far has been the least involved. None of the crap the Northwests have done has affected her directly, she did not directly help Pacifica with her escape, she did not work with Pacifica, so of everyone in the family, on the surface at least, she seems the least likely.
Shane: Which is exactly why she'd be the perfect canidate. Because you wouldn't suspect her.
Ryan: Exactly. Also, if it was her, she hired a hitman, which means, again, she didn't do this directly.
Shane: She's a puppet master!
Ryan: She is.
Ryan: When asked about the footage, Mabel claimed she was calling her fiance, Romulus Oakland, to make sure the Northwests were not targetting him or anyone else close to the family. A look at Romulus' phone would confirm that the two had been texting and calling back and forth, though many people suspect that Mabel was in fact texting and calling two different people at the same time, and that she only contacted Romulus to cover her tracks.
Shane: Clever girl.
Ryan: Very, if this is infact what happened.
Ryan, narrator voice: The sixth theory is that the killer was not a member of the Pines family at all, but someone from another party. Remember, the Northwests had been scamming the town of Gravity Falls for generations, and had ruined several of the local families econmic status and livlihoods long before any of this occured. The Northwests also never paid for these crimes, as they were only jailed on charges of abuse, not theft, or fraud. Therefore, it is possible that one of these lesser known victims decided to get revenge.
Shane: No.
Ryan: No? Why not?
Shane: It's too simple.
Ryan: To simp-what? You don't think it's possible this could have just been someone else?
Shane: Yeah, but I like it better that it was someone in family. Also, what about that hair? That hair with the DNA?
Ryan: Glad you mentioned it.
Ryan, narrator voice: Remember, though the hair found could have, and most likely, came from a member of the Pines family, this cannot be proven without a doubt. Furthermore, just one day before Priscilla and Preston checked into their motel room, Dipper caught Priscilla trying to sneak into the hospital nursery to kidnap his children. The two got into a physcial altercation, which could have resulted in some of Dipper's hair getting stuck to Priscilla's clothes and then being transferred into the room.
Shane: Mmm…
Ryan: You still don't like it?
Shane: No. I mean, it's strange to say, but I really want one of people in the family to have done it.
Ryan: I get that. It just, I don't know, feels very poetic to think that someone in the family doing it.
Ryan, narrator voice: The seventh theory is that the Pines family, as a whole, worked together to take out Preston and Priscilla.
Shane: How so?
Ryan: That's it.
Shane: That's it! Just...maybe they worked together?
Ryan: Basically.
Shane: Screw You!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: I was all prepped to hear about this whole, mission impossible level scheme, and instead I just get "Maybe they were all in it."
Ryan: Well, just wait until you here the last theory.
Ryan, narrator voice: The eighth theory is that the vengeful ghosts of those hurt by the Northwest family in the past took Preston and Priscilla out.
Shane: Nope! Nope! Nope!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: We're not even going there! This is a true crme story! None of your supernatural bullcrap, just no!
Ryan: Just wait, just wait, there's more-
Shane: Ugh!
Ryan, narrator voice: One strange fact about Stanley Stanford Pines, that I did not mention, is that there is a period of about 30 years where Stanley faked his death and pretended to be Stanford. During this time the real Stanford seemingly vanished. When asked about what had happened and why, no one in the family would state what happened. Even to this day, the family is very tight lipped about this strange 30 year period. This has lead many people to believe that Stanford has some sort of supernatural power, that makes it possible for him to travel through dimensions or teleport, and that he used these powers to kill the Northwests.
Shane:...
Ryan: Shane?
Shane:...
Ryan: Oh...oh my gosh *turns to camera* I think I broke him.
Shane: *Gets up, walks off screen*
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane (off screen): *muffled scream*
Ryan: *Laugh**Wheeze**Laugh*
Shane: *Returns, sits, sighs*
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: Proceed.
Ryan: *wheeze*
Ryan, narrator voice: The FBI would eventually take over the case. Upon doing so, though, they discovered that several of the files of evidence were missing. The official report from the Gravity Falls police force said that one of their members, Deputy Durland, accidently dropped the files into the nearby lake during transport. This loss of evidence would make the murders difficult to solve, and in the end no one would ever be officially indicted or charged in the case.
Shane: You know what, thse people screwed the whole town, tortured their daughter physcially and emotionally, tried to kidnap their grandchildren. They'd gone to jail, they'd been banned from town. Nothing was going to stop them, so what do you do?
Ryan: You shoot 'em.
Shane: SHOOT 'EM IN THE FACE!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: Good ridance.
Ryan: I do think someone in the Pines family did it.
Shane: Oh, yeah, and I'm still pissed that you didn't give me a good "the whole family did it" theory.
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane: So, you know what, screw you, I'm doing my own theory.
Shane, narrator voice: It's 10 p.m., Halloween's Eve-
Ryan: That's not a-
Shane: Shut up! This is my turn!
Ryan: *wheeze*
Shane, narrator voice: It's 10 p.m., Halloween's Eve. Stanley leaves on a dingy, going to go "grocery shopping." Mabel sits in the livingroom, watching tv to distract herself until the time is right. At about 10:45, she gets the call from Stanley. 'The job is done' he said. Mabel then called Stanford. Stanford, cleverly, walked out of frame of the camera before making his way to shore. He would then help his brother clean up the scene of the crime. As they worked, Mabel discussed with Jesus the false alibi he would give, periodically texting her fiance to cover her tracks. At 12:00 a.m., her great uncles returned, and the job was done.
Shane: Eh?
Ryan: Eh, it's fine.
Shane: Screw you!
Ryan: I will agreed with you on one point, though, I do think it was somone in the Pines Family.
Shane: Oh, yeah.
Ryan: Whether it was just one of them, or two, maybe even all of them working together, I think these guys have just had enough of these two harrassing them and they took matters into their own hands.
Shane: Most definately.
Ryan: Kind of some poetic justice.
Shane: I mean, normally, you don't want to retaliate with murder. That's typically not a good way handle things, but in this case...I mean, they had to go.
Ryan: Yeah, clearly nothing else was going to stop them. So, do what you've got to do.
Ryan, narrator voice: From the ease of life as socialites, to being shot down in a seedy motel, the story of Preston and Priscilla Northwest is one full of crime and mystery. Who killed them? Was it a member of the Pines family? Was it Pacifica herself? Or a random townsmember acting out their version of vengeance, or vigilante justice? For now, the case of the murders of Preston and Priscilla Northwest will remain, unsolved.
