Creating new Journal entry...

Created.

Initiating voice recording systems...

Done.

Speak anytime.

So uh, Boris told me that I should be time-stamping these things. Well, to satisfy his inner demons, today is March 29th, 2058. Happy now, jackass?

Good enough.

Great. Now that that's done, I can get into my day. So, I woke up, and ate some breakfast. That seems normal, right? Well, it wasn't. You see, on the base we eat these absolutely disgusting MREs made up of a tin of squishy, goopy tuna, and a hard-as-my-dick-in-the-morning piece of bread. If we're lucky, we might get a stale brownie as dessert. If we're lucky. Today however, we got, well, I got a full-on bacon, egg, and cantaloupe gourmet breakfast. Only me. Brian, Boris, and Kai had to eat the MREs and stare at me, their mouths drooling.

We were NOT drooling!

Shut-up Brian, you were drooling!

Was not!

Was too!

You two are the most immature homo sapiens I've ever had the pleasure to come across.

*A punch*

That settles that, continue the story.

THAT DOES NOT SE-

ANYWAYS, there I was, getting stared at, and along comes, you guessed it, Lena. She walks up and sits down, putting her head on her hand.

"Enjoying the food?" she asks, all the while giving me this, and I swear to god, pick-me-up-and-bang-me-on-the-table look. I say yeah, why? Turns out, she felt badly about running into me and not stopping to help pick up the thousand or so bullets that went EVERYWHERE, so she cooked me the meal. And I have to say, a British girl with a cute butt that can also cook? I'm sold.

You lucky bastard. I'm like, ten times more handsome than you, yet she doesn't even glance my way. Like, the hell?

You're Chinese, Boris. Have you ever seen a Chinese guy with a British accent?

Yes.

Prove it.

Screw you.

Exactly. Anyways, as I was saying, she made the meal as a way of apologizing, and I daresay it was the best apology I've gotten in a long time. Speaking of apologies, Brian, Boris, don't you have something to say...?

What?

Yeah, what?

Maybe something about the boxes you dumped on me?

Oh... uh...

That wasn't my fault. Brian slacked off.

You did too!

Did not.

Did too!

Not again...

*Both Boris and Brian* SHUT-UP KAI!

Ah well, I'll beat the apology out of them later.

You'll try!

Do you want me to?

...no.

Then be quiet, I'm trying to talk here.

*Loudspeakers* LIGHTS OUT IN 3 MINUTES

See? Look what you two did.

Coulda ignored us...

I can't exactly ignore someone who's yelling at someone else. Especially if that "someone else" is yelling back.

Hey hey, don't bring me back into this.

I won't then. Looks like I'm signing off, once more. I'll continue the story tomorrow. Later.

Gettin' even more familiar with that thing, e-

*A thud*

Why'd you throw a goddamn book at me?

Because you need to read, learn a few things. Jackass.

Well said, well said!

*Everyone* Shut-up Kai!