D: Hello fans first off let me apologize for not updating sooner but the muses refused to inspire me. Curse them I say curse them. However, I managed to become inspired once again and will try to update sooner. Thank you for both your patience and support!

Disclaimer: Still don't own PJATO….Curses

*random internet café*

D: Well, Hermes seems to have calmed down so I can finally post again *sigh*

D: Without further delay I present to you the next installment of Ways to Enrage a Greek god

Hera

1. Express your wonder at the fact that she hasn't faded yet due to the substantial decrease in "traditional" families. When she denies these facts simply roll your eyes and say, "Sure whatever helps you sleep at night"

2. State that the two time Zeus even bothered were when he was very frustrated and very hung over. Cite Ares and Hephaestus respectively when she denies your truthful accusations

3. Explain why she should also be considered the goddess of gold diggers due to the fact that she married Zeus simply just to become queen of the gods (Bonus points if you point out how creepy, gross and over all disgusting it is that she married her brother)

4. State that Aphrodite (Love) is the reason most relationships succeed while she (Marriage) is the reason most fail

5. Mention how cold and heartless someone has to be to throw their own son of a mountain (Bonus points if you also mention how hypocritical that someone would have to be to call themselves the goddess of family after the fact)

6. State how laughable it is that the so called goddess of marriage is constantly getting cheated on (Bonus points if you say that she should confront Zeus directly about this and stop blaming the other women and their children)(Extra Bonus points if you cite the certain infidelities that involved her sisters and/or friends)

7. Explain how the excuse "I did it for the good of the family" is not a good excuse for such things as trying to kill members of the family you dislike such as your husbands illegitimate children

8. Steal her wedding ring and convince Zeus that she was unfaithful. Proceed to laugh hysterically at the soap opera antics that will ensue (Note: If you wish to get yourself or someone else killed state that you/they are either A: the one whom she committed the infidelity with or B: the result of said infidelity) (Bonus points and prayers if you actually manage to get her to break her vows or can prove you are the result of her vow breaking)

9. Use her otherwise useless cabin at Camp Half-Blood as your personal spray painting canvas. When she starts yelling at you for defiling her cabin explain that since no one was using it you thought no one would really give a damn. (Bonus points if you continue using it after she told you to stop)

10. Question her as to why she only cursed Annabeth at the end of BOTL and not Percy. Especially since Percy was the one who got most of the help and insulted her just as much. When she can't come up with a decent answer say, "Its cause you're scared of Poseidon isn't it" then laugh at her total spinelessness

Until next time this is D of D'n'A000 signing off

*Logs off computer*

D: Yes it's done! It's finally done! Take that Hera! Mwhahahaha!

Hera: What is this outrage you shall pay with your life you mortal filth!

D: Actually, funny thing is I'm not a mortal I'm a demi-god *shifts nervously* hehe

Hera: Than whose the pathetic excuse of a god that sired you

D: Oh my dad's Hades

Hera: Ah Hades what a pathetic slimy little…WAIT YOUR SERIOUS

D: yeah I'm his son alright and proud of it

Hera: *Shifts quite nervously* oh well sorry about that it's just some of the stuff you said was quite rude

D: Wow well since you're in such a forgiving mood I'm sure you wouldn't mind that I spray painted your cabin riiiight *looks up hopefully*

Hera: YOU. DID. WHAT. You horribly evil little cretin I WILL MURDER YOU *glares with intense hate*

D: Thought so….*Throws smoke bomb and shadow travels away*

Hera: *Cough* Curse you! *Cough* [insert various ancient and modern profanities here] *Cough*

*Undisclosed location*

D: I should probably avoid cows from now on

Cow: Moooo *glares hatefully* Mooooo!

D: *Turns around* I just had to land in the field of a dairy farm didn't I?

*Various cows notice new presence and glare hatefully*

D: *Running for life* Craaaap!

Note: Next God/goddess will be decided by you the fans so send a review or PM with your choice. I thank you in advance and look forward to your input

Note 2: My sis A has this awesome vampire story called Bite Me on fan fiction. I've read it and it's totally kick ass (This is coming from a guy that utterly despises the Twilight books so that's saying something).I encourage you to take a look at it and drop a review. Also, the next chapter of HSG is coming soon so please be patient

Special thanks to Shimmering Huntress for inspiring me to create this list. It was challenging but, quite fun. Thanks again, YOU ROCK!

Sincerely,

D of D'n'A000