The Other Side of the Coin


"OI!"

A finger snapped in front of her face but she continued to stare blankly ahead.

"OI! MUTT!"

A hand shot out and grabbed her shoulder, yanking her backwards.

"What the-?"

'Beeeeppp!' The horn of the truck sounded as it zoomed by.

Now that is close. I nearly died. What would…

"What the hell is wrong with you mutt! Do you have a death wish? Are you freaking nuts?"

Natsuki shook her head to prevent herself from continuing her train of thoughts.

"Are you even listening to me?"

"You said something Nao?"

"You will be the death of me. Quit spacing out! It has been months. MONTHS mutt. Get a grip. You have been acting weird ever since Fujino's unannounced visit. Well, weirder than normal."

"Weird? How?"

"You mean you don't even realize it?"

Nao rolled her eyes and smacked Natsuki on her head.

"You know what, I'm washing my hands out of this. Mai can take over. Or maybe Sei can get some sense into you. Or Youko. She could show you the flaw in the logic of your last sentence. How Sei manages to score a woman that intelligent is beyond me. But that is not the point. You, mutt, should get a grip." With that, Nao walked off.

"I'm spacing out and acting weird?"

She mumbled to herself as she made her way back to her apartment.

"Just remember, despite the number of years that went by, I still love you." She shook her head to clear it of the echo of the one sentence that has been in her head ever since Shizuru said it a few months ago. The PIN number..I know I shouldn't have done it. But when they asked me to key in a six digit code for my card, somehow those were the first numbers that popped into my head. Her reaction to it…Was that the real Shizuru? That kiss…She reached up and touched her lips. It was months ago and she still couldn't believe that Shizuru had kissed her. The incident replayed in her head over and over again. Someone up there must really don't like me. She had been dreaming of that one sentence and the kiss ever so often that she loses sleep over it.

Opening the door, she nearly tripped over a beer bottle. Damn it Nao. How many times do I have to tell that stupid spider to clean up after her parties. Argh!

'Come what may
I won't fade away
But I know I might change

Nothing comes easily
Fill this empty space
Nothing is like it was
Turn my grieve to grace

Nothing comes easily
When do I regain?
Nothing can bring me peace
I've lost everything
I just wanna feel your embrace'

The mobile phone on the table begins to ring. Sei left her phone here again. The lyrics of the ringtone registered and Shizuru's words echoed in her head. "I still love you". Shizuru. Are you even thinking of me now? That kiss. Why did you kiss me? After so many years, are you really still in love with me? She recalled the day Shizuru confessed her feelings. It was a typical Tuesday afternoon. Little did Natsuki know that one text message could turn her day upside down and her feelings inside out.

-Flashback-

Bzzzt. Her phone buzzed with a text.

'You have a minute?'

'Yeah. Sure. Physics is boring me to bits. Senior high isn't as fun as you make it out to be Shizuru.'

'Ara, Natsuki is calling me a liar? Just half a year into senior high and Natsuki is finding it annoying already? That is a feat.'

'Gah! Stop teasing me. How is college treating you?'

'So far so good. I just got out of class actually.'

'And the reason you texted me is because?'

'There is something which I need to tell you. Could you give me a ring?'

'Now?'

'If it is possible, yes.'

Natsuki looked up and saw her teacher glaring her way.

'Nah-uh. No way I could pick up the call or call you. You nearly got me into trouble Fujino. The idiot standing in front was glaring at me. Couldn't you just tell me over text?'

'Well then. I never thought I'd ever say this. I goaded Haruka into confessing to Yukino by betting that she would never have the courage to confess her feelings. Who knew Haruka got a little wiser this time and hedge her bet. So for the first time, I lost a bet to her. I think she must be jumping for joy at the fact that she best me for the first time ever. Anyway, her hedge was that if she confessed, I would have too. And though I know the chances are slim and close to none, I like you Natsuki. Very very much. This would probably come as a shock to you seeing how close we were the last couple of years and I have never told you. Now I just hope that you would not freak out and run away. A bet is a bet. I had to show Haruka that the message is in my sent folder before she would believe that I actually did hold up my end of the bargain. Hanging around Yukino is doing wonders for her.'

Her jaw hit the table when she saw the reply and sifted through the ton of padding to find the main point of the text. It hit the table with such a bang that she is surprise that no one turned and looked in her direction. Somehow it feels as though the world had fallen from under her feet. Shizuru? She..she…she… her brain is working overtime as it struggle to come to terms with the situation. Why me? All this time, I thought she was going out with Kanzaki. She recalled the times when Shizuru would spend almost every available second with her, skipping meetings in favor of tutoring her in her work. But isn't that all? She did hear rumors on the grapevine that there had been talks about the time they were spending with each other. With Shizuru being the president of the student council, no one said much for they all respected her privacy. Now that I think of it, wasn't there a period of time before she left, her classmates would say things along the lines of: if you're looking for Shizuru, all you need to do is find Natsuki.

"Kuga-san, would you like to explain to the class how to solve this problem?"

"If I knew how to solve it, things would be great." She mumbled under her breath.

"What did you just said?"

Natsuki looked up and saw that she had accidentally said it out loud. Thank god he didn't hear that.

"I said, I'm afraid I have no idea how to solve that problem sir."

"That's what I thought. Now pay attention or I will see you in detention."

Giving the teacher a quick nod, she turned back to her current dilemma.

How am I going to reply her?

She knew she have to give Shizuru a reply of sorts but she couldn't come up with one.

How is it that I didn't see it? Was there really something there at all?

The bell rang for the end of the day. She packed her bag and walked out of the class to her bike on auto-pilot while she racked her brains to come up with an answer. It wasn't until a week later that she finally replied the message.

'I have no idea what to say? I'm flattered that you like me, but I hope we could remain as friends.'

And she never received a reply.

-End of flashback-

From that day on, things were never the same between us. I should have used a little brain and try to figure out my own feelings before I replied her instead of doing things without thinking them through. It has been so many years and I'm still trying to figure out what is it I feel for her. Why couldn't things be simpler? She knew Shizuru was avoiding her and she was doing the same, until recently that is. Well, it takes two to tango. She mused as she flopped down onto her bed. Looks like it is going to be another sleepless night.


AN: this was meant to be a oneshot but i figured, might as well show both sides of the coin. enjoy! ((: