Series: Twilight Saga
Theme: Tag/Missing Scene
Characters: Bella (Swan) & Edward Cullen
Rating/Warning: R/Intended for Mature audiences
Summary: Breaking Dawn, Missing Scene - The Honeymoon
Author's Notes/Comments: This story came to me while I was having a little writer's block. I hurriedly banged this out (no pun intended) so that I could move on to another story. I haven't written anything in nearly a year, so I hope this doesn't suck too badly. Anywho…enjoy! D.
Part 2 – Edward
Edward gradually noticed the change in Bella's mood. The closer they grew to the shore the more solemn she became. When he paused by the tree to gather their things she pushed out of his arms, quickly wrapped in her towel and hurried towards the house, stumbling in her haste. He stared after her stunned. Had he missed something? Done something wrong? He played back the events of the last forty minutes in his mind and could find no error on his part. Bella's frenzied passion and shattering release had been real, there was no acting on her end. Not that she could act or lie for that matter.
He'd been very careful to maintain his control, or so he'd thought. He'd distanced himself from the pleasure, not giving in, no matter how badly he'd wanted to. The only time he'd felt himself waiver was near the end when she'd pleaded for release. For one second his hand had tightened and his thrusts deepened, but surely that….
Edward frowned, a sickening feeling settling low in his gut. She was so fragile it would only take a millisecond to hurt her. And she would try to hide it or lie to spare his feelings. Anger and disgust rolled through him. He agonized over the thought of causing Bella pain, wanting to run away and take her pain with him, but knew that he couldn't. He could only face the pain that he'd caused and beg for forgiveness.
Edward slipped into his pants and followed Bella into the house. He found her sitting on the side of the large white bed in the middle on the room. She looked so small, almost child-like sitting on the high bed, her small feet dangling over the side, head bowed low and shoulders hunched forward protectively. A fresh wave of self-hatred flowed through Edward knowing that he'd done this to her. He walked to the bed and knelt at her feet. Not allowing himself the luxury of touching her, he balled his hands into the comforter at her side. "Bella," he breathed her name. "Please," he stressed, "tell me the truth." Edward looked at her wishing for the millionth time that he could read her thoughts. "Did I hurt you? Are you in pain?"
Bella looked up, a genuine flash of surprise crossing her face. Her brow knotted in confusion. "Pain? Why would I be in pain?"
He frowned, not wanting to say the words, but forcing himself to, "Because I hurt you."
She shook her head. "You didn't hurt me. Why would you think that?"
He could tell that she was telling the truth, which was a huge relief, but now wondered at her sadness. "On the way to the shore you were silent and then outside you pushed away from me as if you didn't want me to touch you. I thought I'd hurt you in some way and that you were trying to hide it from me." He reached for her hand twining their fingers together. "Sweetheart, if I didn't hurt you why are you so sad?"
Her gaze dropped to her lap. A few moments passed before she finally spoke, her voice was barely above a whisper. "I know that I didn't please you. I know that you didn't…," She shrugged and blush bright red.
Understanding dawned and brought with it acute relief. He'd feared something worse, but this was merely a misunderstanding. He lifted her chin and gazed deeply into her eyes. "Bella, I love you more than life….existence…itself. You are the only reason that I continue to be. Of course you please me."
She shook her head, unable to stop the tear that escaped her eye, "Emotionally yes, but not sexually."
He brushed the tear away and caressed her check. "Baby, that wasn't you. It was me." He could tell from her expression that she didn't fully understand and explained. "I purposely held back to stay in control. I wanted to be sure I didn't hurt you."
Edward watched the changes in her expression and wished, yet again, to be able to read her thoughts. Not knowing always made him expect the worse, but he rarely had to wait very long. Her expression soon became clear. She was angry.
Bella pulled her hand from his and balled it into a fist. "And this was your plan all along?" she accused. "Not to make love to me, but to manipulate me like a chess piece in some sick and twisted game?"
"No," he shook his head bewildered, "of course not." Edward stood and turned away, wondering how her mind had taken such a wild leap. He sighed, running a hand through his tousled hair. "I thought of it at the reception after J-"
"Don't!" She yelled at him, jumping off the bed. "Don't you dare bring him into this. This is about us, you and me, we had a deal!"
Edward turned in time to see her brush away angry tears. He'd known what she expected, a night of passion, and that's what he'd given her. Surely, she could see that this way was best. It allowed him to keep his promise and keep her alive. But she didn't seem to care. She was really angry, hurt even. He hesitated, feeling confused; unsure of himself and his actions. He'd only tried to please her. To give her what she wanted, like always, but had he been wrong? Had he allowed his fears to get in the way? Had he hurt her...again?
"Bella," he breathed as he gazed into her eyes, pleading for her to understand "I did it to pro-"
She shook her head in denial. "You said you would try."
"I did," he conceded.
"You promised me."
"I know," he sighed.
She held up her hand, her wedding ring sparkled in the light.
"I married you."
Edward closed his eyes against the onslaught of her words; each one striking him like a sledgehammer to the chest.
"I pushed aside my fears, my preconceived notions and married you because I loved you, because I wanted to make you happy. I trusted you and you lied to me….again."
Her voice broke into a sob and he felt the crack in his long dead heart deepen. He'd done it again. He'd been so busy trying to protect her from himself, that he'd hurt her anyway. He'd lied, by omission, like a coward. She'd faced her fears to please him, while he'd used his as a crutch. She deserved better and he wanted to be better for her.
Edward pulled her into his arms, burying his face in her hair. He inhaled her mouth-watering scent and accepted the burn as his penance. It would get worse, much worse, in the coming hour, but he welcomed the pain, comparing it to hers. He would do it. He would give her what she wanted, what she needed to be happy and live or die with the consequences.
"Sshh," he whispered trying to soothe her quiet sobs. "Sshh." He lifted her chin and looked deeply into her eyes. "I'm sorry," he sighed. "I was wrong. Please….please, forgive me." He cupped her cheek, brushed away her tears and captured her lips in a tender kiss.
Bella pulled away from the kiss, while Edward gently rubbed his lips along her jawline. "Am I forgiven?" he murmured, watching as she struggled for air. Still unable to speak she simply nodded. "Thank you," he replied and smiled, fully aware of what he was doing to her. He had a lot to make up for and would gladly accept any advantage his gifts afforded him. If he had his way Bella wouldn't have a coherent thought for a least an hour or two.
Edward gazed down into her trusting eyes, suddenly pensive. "I love you, Mrs. Cullen." He didn't let her speak. At the moment he couldn't bear to hear the words. Instead he gathered her in a passionate embrace laced with desperation and prayed; prayed that their love would be enough, prayed that he would be strong enough to endure and prayed that he could keep the monster, who even now was poised and ready to strike, at bay. He closed his eyes against the low growled of anticipation heard with in the furthest recesses of his mind and gently removed the towel that separated them.
Making love to Bella came naturally to Edward. It was as easy as breathing, as thoughtless as sight, instinctive…..like the hunt. In a way, he was hunting, but in this hunt his prey called to him. She guided him, communicating wordlessly and he freely gave himself over to her direction; his hands, his mouth, his body was hers to command. He reached out with his senses responding swiftly to her requests, almost fanatical in his devotion. His hearing was attuned to her every sound. Her gasps of delight, sighs of contentment and purrs of ecstasy told him where to lick, suck, kiss and caress. Her moans of rapture or groans of frustration told him when to deepen his thrusts or whether to slow or quicken his strokes. But it was the way that he loved her, that same instinctual ease, that threatened to tear him asunder.
If there was ever a place where Heaven and Hell collided, Edward was sure, beyond a reasonable doubt, that he was there now. Bella, whose deliciously eager tongue and tight, hot, wet body, held him prisoner between her silky smooth thighs. She lured him with a siren song that he was helpless to resist. While the monster in him, heady with her tantalizingly succulent scent, whispered dark yearnings in his ear. He admired the beautiful rose flush of her skin; smiled at the sound of her soft, wet heart pumping sweet blood through her moist veins. He studied the gentle pulse under the nearly translucent skin of her neck and imagined how easy it would be to kill her, no more than a kiss, and how her skin would give like the fluffiest of creams.
Edward moaned in fear. He felt weak, helpless to control his conflicting desires. The man in him hungered for release and the monster in him thirsted for her blood. He tensed, straining, fighting to hold on just a little longer and then felt Bella's hand, warm and smooth, against his cheek. He knew that she could see it, the thirst and the hunger warring within him, each struggling for control. She pulled his face close to hers and smiled softly. "I love you," she sighed.
Edward closed his eyes and bowed his head in shame. He didn't deserve her, he never had, this brave beautiful soul that was now his; his mate, his wife. She loved him, all of him, the man and the monster and was willing to sacrifice herself to please him. He accepted her declaration for what it was; her permission…to end her life, take her soul and truly claim her as his. The man in him was humbled and horrified, while the monster in him was triumphant and rejoiced.
Three things happened almost simultaneously. First, Bella gasped his name as her back arched and she stiffened with release. Secondly, the monster, noting his distraction, jumped at his moment of weakness. He reared up its ugly head, preparing to strike, and growled, jubilant at finally being free. Third, a wave of white hot release struck Edward, stunning both the monster and the man. He'd never felt anything like it. Wave upon wave of bone melting pleasure washed over him as his teeth sank into the pillow less than an inch from Bella's neck. He groaned, completely spent, and waited for the shudders that racked his body to subside.
Edward rolled onto his back and sighed. He cuddled Bella to his chest and smiled. She'd been right all along. In the past, he'd been strong enough to with stand the pull of her blood and save her from death. And tonight their love, their passion, had been enough to subdue the monster; his dormancy was proof of that.
He buried his nose in her hair and breathed deeply, enjoying the delicious burn. She was his, truly his in all the ways that mattered. Mine. His smile deepened as the word resounded in his head, as the feral growl of satisfaction rumbled low in his chest.
