I continued to glare at the door after my dad had shut it. Who does he think he is? What could possibly motivate him to act like that? I have no idea, could it be because she was a child of rape? No, why would it? Well…maybe, it might be something personal for Alexander that I know nothing about. Ah, who cares? If I never see that stupid self-righteous cad again it'll be too soon.
I sighed, right now Violet was crying and I had to sooth her. I pulled her up so that her ear was right on top of my heart so she could hear the beating. I started humming a gothic lullaby to her. She fell asleep soon after. I put her in the crib after lightly kissing her eyelids and stroking her face from her cheek over her forehead and to her other cheek.
She was then sleeping soundly. I walked back down stairs and looked around my parents were looking at the door angrily, Dan and Aunt Libby looked disgusted and mad, but they were hippies and believed in love not war. So they were trying to channel calm into themselves.
I sighed, what did it matter anyway? It was over and done with in exactly twenty seconds, no need to get riled up. I stretched and said a quick goodnight to everyone. Strange to think only about three years ago if I would have been in a situation like this I'd lose my head. But then again I was only sixteen, a kid, losing their head is kind of what teenagers do. I still technically am I teenager but I'm a legal adult and I have to say, I have honestly come into my own.
I got to my room and quickly put on a long sleeve black nightgown that came to my ankles and I put on soft black slippers that were seen on Victorian Woman's feet as slippers. Maturing from being a sixteen year old girl with her first boyfriend to a nineteen with an adopted daughter hasn't so much changed me as matured me. I lean to more the Darkly Elegant now instead of the Death Rock Sexy Club Attire.
I sighed, why was I even bothering to think about my fashion choices? I refused to listen to the stupid honest, blunt, Raven in my head saying because I'm not the same as when Alexander and I were together. Why do I even care? There's so much more to me than my clothes, there always has been, but my clothing has always been about personal expression. They do say you never forget your first love, Alexander may be an ass, but he was my first love. Strange because how I remember it he was sweet, a gentleman, to me at least.
I shook my head to clear it from the awful thoughts that had taken hold of my mind. I don't care what is with Alexander, it doesn't matter. I stretched and as I was about to get in bed I heard a scratching on the window and saw a bat. A bat with blue eyes, the only vampire I know with blue eyes is Luna. I looked out my window and she was on the ground looking at me. I grabbed a crucifix I would sometimes wear and put it on under my gown, I don't want to hurt her or anything. But I'm the only family Violet's got, she needs me. I climbed down using the drainage pipe right beside my window, climbing up and down that thing is just like riding a bike-you never forget.
"Hello Luna." I said to her, she was wearing a long black dress and witchy boots. I noticed her necklace looked similar to the one Alexander had of mine from so long ago, weird coincidence. She had also died her hair black, she looks kind of weird with her hair black, before it had an almost ghostly quality, but whatever floats her boat.
"Stay away from Alexander." Luna said without any pleasantries.
"My pleasure." I said, she looked startled.
"I mean it Raven, stay away from him." She said again.
"Okay, gladly." I said looking at her like she was insane. "If that's all you wanted to say Luna, I've got to go now. It's been a long day, and it's freezing out here."
"You really mean it don't you? You really don't want anything to do with Alexander." Luna said strangely calm.
"Yep." I said popping the p. "I haven't had any contact with him for over two years, well besides today. I don't really care much either way what happens with him." I said before waving goodbye to Luna and climbing up to my room. As I'm about to shut the window a black blur goes into my room and as I turn Luna's standing there.
"What do you mean "besides today"?" Luna asks glaring at me.
"He showed up about twenty minutes ago, insulted my daughter and left." I said simply.
"Your daughter?" Luna asked surprised, then she saw the crib and gently walked over to it. Inside was Violet, sleeping soundly. "She's beautiful, how old is she?"
"Almost two months."
"Two months?" I saw Luna counting back in her head, two months old, nine months pregnant. Equals ten months, nearly a year. How long would I be with someone until the first night?
"Where's her father? A child needs it's sire to survive." Luna asked staring at me with bright blue eyes.
"She's adopted." I said, usually I wouldn't bother telling so many people for no reason really, but she asked. Plus what else can I really say? Better to let Violet always know that she is adopted and that I still love her no matter what. This would also avoid any "when's the right time to tell her?" and her "I can't believe I'm adopted" agony.
"Oh," Luna looked at me with new eyes. She seems to sense I'm not like her, someone depends on me for every last thing they need. That doesn't make me a regular girl. "Well then goodbye Raven." Luna said before turning into a bat and flying off.
I sighed, Luna's changed a lot. But then again it's not like I ever really knew her that well, I still can't believe that she dyed her hair black. I decided to push it out of my mind and go to bed, Violet's going to start crying in a few hours.
I awoke to Violet's gurgled crying and quickly picked her up. After she was calmed I went back to sleep and woke up a few hours later. I know some people say how much they hate this, and I admit I was never one to enjoy something like this; I was never motherly to Billy Boy when we were kids but, with Violet. It was different; she was my little girl, not Summer's not her ex-boyfriend. Mine.
I changed into a long red velvet dress with draping sleeves. I put on a bit of mascara and ruby lips and some slippers. I put on Violet an Alice in Wonderland dress. She always loved that, she can't talk or even really communicate that much but every time she sees it on the TV, no matter which version, she smiles and claps. She doesn't do that for anything else, so I'm guessing she likes it. I put on black and white stripped tights along with the black tap shoes, an ice blue dress that comes to her knees and is short sleeved. At the bottom is a black line of fabric with white bows on the hem in regular intervals. The sleeves are puffed and are a lighter blue color. She wears an apron that is white with the card hearts, spades, diamonds, and clovers on the bottom. I picked her up and carried her down stairs, I threw on a trench coat and put a black fleece blanket around her since it would start snowing some time tonight so it was best to do this now. I wanted to go and see how old Dullesville must of changed in the months I was away. As I walked I saw so much, the diner I'd eat at with Becky, the fabric store Alexander's mother had bought me a purse at, the retailer agency I had my first job at and the nail place. Hmm, I wonder if ol' Jane is still there.
I walk in and look around, there I see Jane sitting off to the side sipping a water bottle, I walk up to her.
"Hey Jane," I say and she turns and looks at me. For a second she doesn't seem to recognize me than her eyes widen.
"Raven!" She hugs me; to say I'm surprised is a gross understatement-Jane doesn't hug. I hug her back one armed and then she turns to Violet. Violet studies her for a few moments, looking serious and then slowly smiles and begins to laugh. Jane looks at her smiling slightly, but then her eyes zero in on my left hand, with the bare ring finger.
Jane looked at me I sighed, there would always be people who wouldn't accept me for my choice and immediately decide I wasn't as good as them. Thankfully, Jane didn't say anything and we talked about inconsequential things for a while before I left to head to Becky's for lunch. I knew that Jane was from a different time but her keeping any judgments she may or may not have about me to herself is all I ask of her.
Becky's mom and dad hugged me and prattled around; it had been so long since I've seen them. Becky and I finally got the real chance to catch up on how life had been. Neither of us have gone to College but we don't mind, Becky's doing the one thing she's always wanted to do, follow in her long line of families footsteps. And I may not right now know what I want to be, but I know who I want to be, and I am.
