Thanks to Coolc341 for reviewing!

Chapter 2: Reyna

"I can't do this anymore! I give up! You're all insane!" I collapsed facedown on the concrete at Rory's feet.

After a few minutes I looked up in sudden realization. "Hey, Rory-kun? Where did you get that deep-fried ice cream?"

As soon as I began to taste my own deep-fried ice cream, a calm persona was able to conquer my mind.

"Al-kun, you like cats, right?"

When he looked towards me, I swore I could see sparkles behind him and a blush on his metal face. "I LOVE cats!"

"Do you want to meet my cat, Hazel?"

Now there definitely were sparkles behind the kind-hearted teen. "Yes, please! Ed never lets me keep any."

Five minutes later, we all arrived in front of my yellow abode.

Not to my surprise, the door was unlocked. Almost immediately after shutting the door, I was violently attacked by a squealing, giggling ball of Lena. "Sis sis! Hi!" She looked over and saw that there were other people in the house. She slowly and cautiously scooted over to me. I sighed and picked her up before descending the stairs towards my room, beckoning the awkward mob of teens to follow.

I jumped at a loud scream from behind me. I whipped around, startled. There stood Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist, dog of the military, standing terrified as a fluffy ball of fur circled around his legs. "Mrow?" Stifling a laugh, I reached down and scooped up the grey cat.

"Seriously, Ed? You were scared of this little furball?" I rolled my eyes and turned to Alphonse. " Oh, Al, this is my cat. Her name is Hazel and she is the sweetest cat ever and is not at all violent. You can hold her if you want." The large suit of armour nodded furiously and I carefully transferred her to his gentle arms.

"So, Kristina-san, Chandler-senpai, is there anything you want to do or something?"

"Rory-san wants to take a nap," groaned Rory.

"YOU JUST USED AN HONOURIFIC TO REFER TO YOURSELF!" shrieked Chandler.

"I'm tired, okay?! Edward is a tiring person to handle!"

"DON'T BE BLACK STAR, RORY-KUN!"

"I CAN BE WHOEVER I WANT!"

Edward finally got the insult through his thick skull. " Hey!"

~Rory~

I should have known better than to let our little gang stop off at Starbucks.

Much of what transpired there I have sworn never to speak of again, but I can at least tell you that it involved Edward reciting the Periodic Table of Elements around twenty times. The whole thing. 118 elements. Never give that boy caffeine.

Mustang randomly seduced the girl behind the counter. All he said was "hello" and she started swooning.

Alphonse didn't mean any harm. Honestly. It's not his fault he's seven feet tall with a spike on his head. And really, Starbucks should get a bigger door anyway. I mean, Ed might've made it a little bigger when he fixed it with alchemy, but it's a little hard to tell what with all the skulls and demon horns.

We got banned from Starbucks.

"HYDROGENHELIUMLITHIUMBERYLLIUMBORONCARBONNITROGENOXYGENFLOURINENEONSODIUMMAGNESIUMALUMINIUM…" sang Ed, climbing on top of Alphonse and showering us all with empty coffee sleeves.

"Okay, which one of you gave Ed coffee?" I accused, cardboard coffee sleeves bouncing off my head.

Chandler slowly raised a hand. "I, uh, asked him what he wanted and he said 'I don't care', so I just got him coffee…"

"Brother… Calm down…" pleaded Alphonse as Edward started playing soccer with his brother's head.

"Solution!" Kristina snatched Al's head out of Edward's grip and slammed it over his own golden head. Edward stumbled around, unable to see, until he bumped into Al and promptly fell over.

"That works," the Colonel approved.

"Mrphhhhsmrggggphhhmgghh!" Ed protested. Reyna patted him on the head (or rather, the helmet currently covering his head).

"There, there, Ed," she said comfortingly. "At least none of that coffee had milk in it."

"Actually, it did."

"MRRRRRRPHHHGHHHH!"

We tried to get the helmet off, but… well…

"It's stuck."

"But… my head!"

"It's alright, Al, I'm sure we'll get it off." soothed Reyna.

I yanked harder, but the helmet was well and truly stick. "Geez, Kristina, did you put glue in this thing?"

"I don't know! Maybe he just has a really big head!" I heard Ed grumble something from inside the helmet, but I couldn't understand it for the life of me. I had a feeling I didn't really want to, though.

"Okay… Chandler, grab his legs!" She stuck her tongue out at me, but obeyed. Ed flailed around a lot, making it difficult. "One… two… three… Pull!"

We pulled.

The helmet slid upwards and I cheered. However, then it decided to get stuck on Ed's rather sticky-outy nose.

"Oh, come on!"

"Hey, I can't see anything!" complained Edward, blindly feeling his way around until he walked straight into the Colonel. "Al? Is that you?"

"Considering I'm not seven feet tall and made of metal, I'd say no," drawled Mustang.

Edward tried to look indignant. It was hard when half his face was covered by a lopsided metal helmet. He then turned to strut off in a dignified manner, but his feet got tangled in the long, white plume of hair hanging down from Al's helmet, and he promptly fell on his face with a loud clang.

"Well… That just happened…" I deadpanned. "Anyone got butter?"

"Butter?" Kristina asked quizzically.

"Yeah, I figure if we grease him up enough it'll probably come off."

Behind her, Reyna turned bright red.

"What?"

"With butter." The thought occurred to me that I was talking about rubbing butter on the Fullmetal Alchemist and before I knew it, I was flushing too.

"Well, if you've got a better idea…" I spluttered. My face felt hot. Well, I thought, this is awkward.

I knew that Reyna had a huge anime crush on Ed. I wasn't as good at reading Kristina, but I knew she, at the very least, thought he was objectively pretty. (Hello friends, IRL Kristina persona here, I am gay as all hell, so no crushes, only an appreciation of beauty.)

And as for me, well, I'm gay as they come. (YAYYYYYYYY! GAYYYYY!- Kristina's irl persona.)

"Okay, so butter is out!" I spluttered, my face as red as Reyna's. "Any other ideas?"

"Yeah. We chop his head off." Chandler looked at me, completely serious.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! shrieked Edward.

Chandler has never seen past episode 3 of Fullmetal Alchemist. And she holds Edward in no high regard. At all.

Apparently not even enough regard to want his head to stay attached to his body.

A/N: Using honourifics to refer to oneself is considered very arrogant, though that is usually with -sama. For those of you that don't know (I was one of you until recently), -san is a gender-neutral honourific, -kun is more male and -chan more female, while -senpai means senior, basically.