PMD Insane – Chapter 2

Lunch and The Guild

"So, what was that favour you wanted of me?"
Seren glanced at Ashton and smirked. She slowed her pace down slightly and scratched under her chin, chuckling quietly.

"Well, there is only one way to do so," she chortled, ears twitching.

"And that would be?" Ashton asked slowly. iGod, is she trying to be so annoying?/i

"FEED ME~!" she cried, throwing her arms in the air, "All night long~!"

Ashton simply frowned at her and raised an eyebrow. "What?" he snorted.

Seren sweatdropped. "Get me lunch or I'll kill you," she muttered, scratching her belly, "NOW."
The Pikachu twitched his ears.

"Um...okay?" he said slowly, "That's the favour you want off of me? For me to buy you food?"
"Yes!" Seren exclaimed, grinning madly, "Now, any good places in town?

"Well, there is Spinda Cafe," Ashton mumbled, shrugging over his shoulder, "I go there a lot-"
"Spinda Cafe it is~!" she exclaimed, grabbing him by the paw and running off, "Where is it?"
"Just past the place shaped like a Duskull's head," he groaned. It was going to be a VERY long day.

"Here it is." Ashton's ears twitched towards the medium-ish tent in front of them. It was a pale tan in colour and over the entrance read a sign saying, 'Spinda Cafe'. Beside it was a little picture of a Spinda, grinning like a manic.

Seren raised her head and sniffed heavily, a sudden trickle of drool dripping down her muzzle.

"Mmm," she murmured, licking her lips, "Something smells good!"
"Best food in town or your money back," he explained, "Come on." He trotted inside the door, Seren dragging herself behind him. The scents of the place hit her even harder when she entered.

This was truly a heaven to her.

"Ah, Ashton!" a bright male voice said suddenly. She blinked at the Spinda. The small panda-like Pokémon twirled on its heel and grinned at her.

"Oh? And who is this?" he asked, a twinkle in his eyes.

"Seren," she said, ears twitching, "And I am STARVING!"

"Oh, I bet you are Miss," the Spinda chuckled, "This way!" He twirled back around and wobbled towards a table for two in the corner. "Sit, sit."
Ashton jumped up onto a chair, and instantly shoved a menu at Seren. "The usual please, Kenny," he said, grinning.

"And for you?" the Spinda – obviously called Kenny – asked, turning to Seren. She jumped up on her chair, which let out a low groan of protest against her weight. She growled and glanced at the menu.

"Um, I'll have a...um..." Her belly rumbled, as if urging her on. "I'll have the spaghetti!" she cried, noticing it in the corner, "And two rounds of garlic bread!"

Kenny frowned and nodded. "You sure that is all?" he asked. She nodded. "Yes, quite sure."
"Ah, okay. Good. Come up to the bar when you're ready to order your drinks."

He toddled away, leaving them alone.

"So," Seren whispered, leaning forwards, "This is what it's like being a Pokémon, is it?"

Ashton glanced at her, his fingers tapping on the table. "You really think you used to be human, eh?" he snorted, "You're well stupid, d'you know that?"

Her cheeks blushed a bright pink and she growled. "I'll go get our drinks," she hissed, "What do you want, a cold glass of arsenic?"

"No, a Diet Coke please," he said blankly. She growled again and stomped to the bar.

"Hello, I'd like to order drinks please!" she barked.

"Jeez, keep yer fur on!" A female Wobbuffet in her twenties turned to her and paused, a frown upon her face. "Do I know you?" she asked quickly.

Seren frowned. "Uh, not so's far as I knows, mun," she muttered, muzzle twitching, "Probably just remind you of someone."
"Um, yes, probably," the Wobbuffet said hurriedly, glancing around, "My mistake...drinks?"
"I'll 'ave another Sash," an Empoleon by the bar said, "HIC."
"I think you've had more than enough Christopher," the Wobbuffet said sternly, "I was asking the Munchlax what she wanted, anyway."
"Um, Diet Coke and a Sprite please," Seren asked, a slight sweatdrop rolling down her face. These Pokémon were weird.

"I'm assuming you've already eaten?" the Wobbuffet said, glancing at the large bulge of Seren's belly.

"NO!" Seren cried, her cheeks blushing again, "JESUS."

"Only asking," she muttered, handing the drinks over, "Straw?"
"In the lemonade," Seren growled, "Coldness hurts."

The Wobbuffet snorted and placed a pale green straw in her glass. "Enjoy."

"Thanks." She stormed back to their table, muttering to herself. She shoved the glass at Ashton and sat down, gulping her drink.

"Hey, save some for the meal!" Ashton snorted, taking a quick sip of his.

"Cae lân Gog," she hissed, leaning her face on her palm.

"No need to be so rude about it," he muttered, turning away. At that moment, Kenny came back with their meals. He placed a pizza in front of Ashton and a large bowl of spaghetti in front of Seren.

"Enjoy your meal," he said curtly, "Ashton, I'll put it on your bill?"
"Yeah, yeah," Ashton said, flicking his paw, "Thanks." Kenny smiled and went away again.

"Oh my God, this smells so good!" Seren cried, licking her lips. Her pupils were wide, the hazely-brown iris' twinkling. Ashton smiled and picked up a slice of pizza.

"You can have an ice cream later if you want," he said, gulping it down. iAsk a stupid question/i he thought.

She wasn't paying attention, as she'd already grabbed a fork and was greedily gulping down the pasta. "This tastes even better than it smells!" she cried, wiping her tongue around her mouth, "So good!"

By the time Ashton was on his second slice of pizza, Seren had already finished, and was gulping down the garlic bread. "That was fast," he mused, finishing off the slice and advancing for a third. She glanced at the barely eaten pizza and licked her lips.

"You gonna-"
"Yes."
"Can I-"
"No."
"Aw, but I only want-"
"No."
"But-"
"No."
"Bu-"

"NO," he said firmly, tail twitching. She pouted.

"You've got tomato sauce all over yer' gob," he growled. She snorted and wiped her mouth hard.
"Gone."
"Yeah."
"Can I-"
"FINE!" he yelled, "God."

Seren grinned and grabbed a slice. She paused and threw it into her mouth whole, swallowing. Ashton stared at her, mouth agog.

"How'd you do that?" he said, pointing at her.

"I've seen my Munchlaxes do it before so I thought I'd give it a try!" she explained, grinning. She stopped and blinked.

"YOUR Munchlaxes?" he said, raising an eyebrow, "What do you mean, YOUR Munchlaxes?"
She glanced at her empty – save for a few bright red streaks of tomato – bowl. "I don't know," she said, ears going flat down, "The words just came out of my mouth..." She looked at him.
"I've heard humans kept Pokémon in tiny little balls and made them battle with each other, against their will," he said slowly, pushing the pizza towards her.

"Can I-"
"Yeah," he said, nodding. She started gulping down what was left of his pizza, and nodded for him to continue.

"They called them...Pokémon Trainers," he went on, nodding, "And they go through these battles with other humans to win small pieces of metal called, um..."
"Badges," Seren whispered, "Gym Leaders!" Ashton glanced up at her.

"You really were human," he muttered, leaning back in his chair, "Tidy."
"Yeah but...I don't know how I remember any of this," she said, "I can't remember much. You saying those things just...brought them back..."

She lay back, placing her arms on her belly. She felt nicely full after the meal, but maybe she could squeeze a little bit more food in there...

"Hey, get that Kenny guy over 'ere now. I want me some ice-cream!"

Ashton sighed. In one ear and out the other, the saying went.

After Seren had eaten two and a half ice-creams (Half because they'd ran out of it and just gave her the carton in the end), the Pikachu and Munchlax duo finally left the Cafe.

Ashton muttered angry mutterings to himself, due to the large amount of money he had to pay up after Seren's feasting. Seren ignored him and instead rubbed her now very full belly and basked in the late afternoon sunshine.

"Well, I better get going," she yawned, "Things to do, places to see, naps to be had."
"Yeah, okay," Ashton mumbled, walking away. He stopped suddenly and turned. "Wait!" he cried, "You don't have anywhere to stay!"
"I could find somewhere!" she replied sharply, "I'm sure someplace will have me!"
"Yeah, someplace with some poor unsuspecting Pokémon who you'll eat out of house and home!" he snorted, trotting back up to her. He stopped and an idea dawned on him.

"Hey, how about we become an exploration team!" he cried, jumping onto his hind legs.

"An exploration what?" she replied, frowning.

"Come with me," he said, running off, "I'll show you!"
She groaned and followed him. Urg, running on a full stomach is never good, she thought.

Soon, they'd reached a large flight of steps. She glared at them. She was already out of breath from the brisk run from the other side of town, this would kill her.

"You want me to climb THAT?" she exclaimed, "NO WAY! CARRY ME!"
"Fat chance, fat ass," he snickered, as he started climbing up them. She gave a sharp, "LAX!" of rage and scrambled after him.

"AND HERE IT IS!" he stated as he reached the top, "The Wigglytuff Guild, where all the greatest exploration teams start out!" He paused as he noticed Seren wasn't there. "Se?"

"I...freaking...hate...you..." Seren gasped, dragging herself towards him and giving him a weak slap across the head, "So...freaking...MUCH."

"Whatever," he muttered, rolling his eyes. He walked forwards onto the grid and inhaled.

"Pokémon detected! Pokémon detected!"

"Who's footprint? Who's footprint?"
"The footprint is Pikachu's! The footprint is Pikachu's!"

"Come on it!"

"YIKES!" Ashton cried, running off, "O-okay Seren, your turn."

Seren groaned and pulled herself forwards, frowning at the gate. How on earth could this thing hold her weight? A low creak told her it wasn't, much.

"Pokémon detected! Poké-"
"Just tell me what Pokémon it is already Duncan."

"O-okay...the footprint is...um...ohm..."

"WHAT DUNCAN? CAN'T YOU TELL?"
"Um-um, THE FOOTPRINT IS EEVEE'S!"
Seren glared at the grate, her pupils slits.

"...what?" she hissed, "What did they say?"
"Eevee's? You sure?"
"Um, no, not really..."
"I'M A FREAKING MUNCHLAX YOU TWAZES!" she screamed, stamping her feet on the grate, "MUNCHLAXES HAVE COMPLEATLY DIFFERENT PAWS TO THOSE FREAKING FUGLY PIECES OF DESU-DESU CRAP!"

Ashton sweatdropped. "Seren," he said, "You have rage."

"SCREW YOU!" she barked.

"Okay, okay, you're a Munchlax! Come in, come in!"

The gate on the Wigglytuff tent (Which Seren had failed to notice until now) sprung open with a loud clatter. The two walked inside, Seren screaming, "GREAT! More stairs!"

By the time they'd reached the first floor, Ashton had shoved Seren's bandana into her mouth to get her to stop talking. He paused as he looked around the place, eyes twinkling.

"Omigosh, this place is so cool!" he cried, tail twitching. Seren mumbled something and pulled her bandana from her mouth, wincing at the slobberyness of it. "You are paying for that," she stated, wiping it along her fur.

"Go away; we don't want your sort here!"

The two frowned. "Who said that?" she asked, glancing at him.

"No clue," he replied.

"By here, imbeciles," the cawing male voice cried. They glanced down to see a Chatot standing there, its beady eyes glaring at them.

"We don't want to buy any sort of vacuum cleaner, take any sort of survey, or anything of that rotten nonsense!"

"Crazy bird says what?" Seren said, frowning.

"Leave!" the Chatot snapped, flicking his wings at them, "NOW."
"But we want to form an exploration team!" Ashton cried. This was his life-long dream, and he didn't want to see it shatter suddenly because some Chatot thought he was a salesman.

The Chatot paused. "...an exploration team?" he said quietly. A large grin formed on his face, before he added cheerfully, "Well, why didn't you say so in the first place? My name is Charo – that's C-h-a-r-o, in case you are interested. I am the second in command here at the Wigglytuff Guild. The Guild Mistress shall be most pleased to have new members!"
"Mistress?" Ashton said, as Charo led them down another level. "I thought the leader of the Guild was a guy."
"Oh, no, he retired," Charo explained, "The leader is now Willow, his daughter."
Ashton nodded. "Ah, yes, of course."

Seren frowned at them. Soon, they reached a door in the corner of the room. Charo coughed slightly and explained, "Now, some rules before you go before the Guild Mistress. Do not, under any circumstances, get on her bad side. Do not try to provoke her or anything of the like. Understand?"
The two nodded nervously. "Good," he said, before knocking on the door gently, "Guild Mistress? I have some new recruits! I'm coming in!"

He pushed open the door and the three walked in. A young Wigglytuff sat on a chair (More like a throne! Seren thought) on the other side of the room.

"Guild Mistress," Charo said, "These are the two Pokémon who wish to join the Guild."
Willow blinked her wide blue eyes at them. "What're your names?" she asked, her mouth in a bright grin.

"A-Ashton," he stammered, "An-and this is Seren."

"Hi," Seren said, waving her claws nervously.

"No need to be scared!" she laughed, "Now, before you join, do you have a Team name?"

"A name?" Ashton said, "Oh jeez, I didn't think about a name...Seren? Can you think of one?"
Seren paused for a few seconds and said suddenly, "DoomBiskit."

The two males frowned at her. Ashton nudged her. "DoomBiskit?" he whispered, "You sure?"
"Yeah," she whispered back, "There's something about that name that reminds me of something, but I don't know what..."

"Okay then! Team DoomBiskit it shall be!" Willow cried, her grin even wider now, "Charo, get them the forms."
"Forms?" the two said in unison, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, yes! You know, we need to keep basic stats on you!"

"Yeah, course..."
Charo handed the two a set of forms and a pen each. "You can fill them out in your rooms," he explained, "Follow me."
Seren let out a large sigh of relief. Bed, at last!