Thanks for the reviews on the last chapter, guys! You have no idea how much it means to me. Keep it up, guys!
Twirling, twirling, twirling.
Brittany lived for moments like this.
Moments where she's completely alone in dim lights dancing to music only she can hear.
She can forget about her home life, grades, and lyrics that are too hard to remember.
All she has to think about is the placement of her feat and the rhythm of her humming.
Brittany let a giggle escape her lips.
It's odd to think about, isn't it?
How care free and stupid everyone thinks she is, yet in moments like these, she can't imagine feeling any deeper, any more in touch with the Brittany that no one has seen.
She's never denied not being smart, she really isn't. Her grades prove that. She may take a while to understand things, and her thought process may not be the same as everyone else, but she still understands the things people say about her. Calling her easy, stupid, treating her like a child.
She wants to just scream at them, tell them she understands, tell them how much they don't know about her.
But, she doesn't. She screams it to herself in her head, at moments like this.
She'd just come from hooking up with some guy on the soccer team. It may seem slutty, but she feels wanted with the guys she fools around with. In those few minutes of lust on their part, she feels nothing but love. A lie she's built up for herself. A lie that consists of those guys actually wanting her, the Brittany that she sees in the mirror in front of her, twirling and twirling away.
The only person she's ever felt true compassion from is her best friend, Santana. But the feeling of being loved becomes shoved away as a feeling of shame comes over her when Santana denies feelings, and proclaims that she doesn't like girls, and that what they've done is wrong.
But in moments like this, when Brittany twirls, and ponders on her life she doesn't see how it can be wrong. All she wants is to feel love, and receive it. And with Santana she feels like that's possible.
How can something that feels so completely right be so wrong according to Santana?
Brittany doesn't say these things to Santana. She only thinks about them as she twirls.
So, that's what she does. She twirls and imagines a life where she's loved and wanted. Not just lusted over.
