Ugh. I hate Crickets. My Mom dumped about three dozen into my Leopard Gecko's cage. THEY REFUSE TO EAT THEM AND I HAVE TO LISTEN TO CHIRPING ALL. NIGHT. LONG.
So I'm sleeping in the living room until they meet their very much timley end.
The King of Pop --- Yeah, I think the same thing. Usually these type of stories are full of Mary Sues/Are just plain stupid.
Anyways...
DISCLAIMER OF D00M!!
DIDN'T YOU LISTEN TO CHUCK NORRIS?! RED DOES NOT OWN NARUTO!
Enjoy ^^
"So," I began, jumping back on the bed and hugging my knees to my chest. "How much does lipstick boy want to kill me?"
"Sakon? Pretty damn badly if you ask me. Because of you he's currently getting a speech from Kabuto,"
"Or Kabbers."
She grinned evilly. "He's getting a speech from Kabbers about behaving properly around guests."
"Nice. Very nice."
She took a few steps inside of the room, looking around. "Huh. You got a bigger room than me… Damn Kabuto…"
I shrugged. "Yeah, but there's nothing in it... 'Sides the carpet... But I think that's just to hide bloodstains..." I blinked, getting an idea. "Hey, Tayuya."
"Eh?"
"You like torturing Sakon as much as I do, correct?"
She nodded. "Hell yeah. Why?"
"Weeeeeell.... Since we're both members of the Sound F- Six, he lives right down the hall from us... So can't we make his life miserable?"
"Heh… You really hate him, don't you?"
"No one head pokeys me and gets away with it. NO ONNNNNNNNNNNEEEE!!" I yelled, rasing a fist and shaking it.
Tayuya nodded, rasing an eyebrow at my over dramatic pose. "Heh. I see."
"Tayuya, aren't you supposed to be training?"
I turned and looked at the speaker.
"Don't you have somewhere else to be?" She growled.
"Lord Orochimaru has asked me to show our new comrade around."
Tayuya glared, then walked out.
"Ello there!" I said, getting up and walking over. "Mah name be Suki! Who be you?"
"Kimimaro." He replied, eyeing me like I was nuts. "Follow me."
"Mkay!" He led me down the hall, and past Orochimaru's room.
"Sooo... You're a member of the Sound Five, er... Six, too?" I asked, already knowing the answer, but wanting to make conversation. Kimimaro was one of my favorite anime characters of all time. Yes, I cried when he died. Sue me.
"Yes. I am the leader, actually. Though hopefully I will become Lord Orochimaru's next vessel." He wasn't coughing at all, so there was a while before the Chunin exams.
I nodded. "So where are we going?"
"My orders were to give you a tour and then to take you to the scroll room to find out what your Chakra nature was."
I grinned. Ellz yesh. I was betting on mine to be fire. Or earth. I didn't want Lightning, though. No Saucy cakes element. PLEASE.
"This is the kitchen." Kimimaro said, jolting me out of my thoughts.
"Does there be pudding here?" I asked.
"Erm… Why?"
"Because that's basically all that I eat. Pudding, strawberries and pocky... Oh and cake."
"... Why cake...?"
I sighed, throwing my arms up in the air. "'Cuz I gotta represent L! Sheesh… Why does everyone ask me that?"
"L...?"
I stared. "You know, from Death Note?" Blank stare. "Looks like a panda?" More blank staring. "Sits in a weird way?"
"Uh, no. I've never heard of Death Note."
I shot him a look. "Eh?! What?! No Death Note?! Damn, boy, have you been living under a rock your entire life?! It's kickass!"
He raised an eyebrow. "Okay…"
I sighed, shaking my head. "This is just... Sad. Just plain sad. You must be educated in the ways of the Death Note. Remind me later and I'll let you borrow a couple volumes."
"Um... Sure..." Then he went back to showing me around. The entire base was basically a giant U. On one side there were all the bedrooms, in the middle there was the kitchen, a small library and a kind of living room and on the other side there was the experiments, exploding stuff, and the kind of shit that eats small children. At the end of that hall there was a door leading to the training grounds. It was also in that hall where the scroll room was located.
It was full of... Well scrolls. Aren't I the descriptive one? In the middle of the room there was some kind of kanji covered raised platform with a circle on it.
"Stand here," Kimimaro said, pointing, "Put your hand on the indent and focus your chakra."
"Erm... Two things. One how da heck do I do that, and two, what is this thing?"
He sighed. "Make this sign with one hand," He showed me the hand sign Deidara made. I copied him and placed my other hand on the indent. "Now focus, and try to will the energy into your hand."
"Kay..." I muttered. After a few seconds my hand had a little blue aura around it. The kanji on the machine platform thingy started to glow white. "And what about my second question? Is this thing gonna eat me or something...?"
"No, I already told you, this is how we find out your chakra nature. Usually Shinobi use a special kind of paper for this-"
"Yeah!" I piped up, remembering the thirty fifth volume of Naruto. "It's called Litmus paper, right?"
"Correct. Unfortunately this paper isn't exactly cheap, nor easy to come by, especially for Lord Orochimaru, so he designed this machine. Essentially it functions in the same way as Litmus paper, but can be used an infinite amount of times."
"Nice." I said, nodding, as the markings fused together to create one giant kanji. "What does it say?" I asked, only knowing the kanji for fire.
"Hm… According to this your chakra nature is water."
I blinked. "Wow. Didn't see that coming."
"Were you expecting something different?"
"Kinda. I thought I would get earth or fire because of my personality." I shrugged. "Water's good too, though." I raised my hand from the machine. Instantly the kanji split into the smaller markings.
Kimimaro walked over to a pile of scrolls, picking a few out and handing them to me. "Here, read these, and do what they say. It will help you control your chakra better. After you finish, come to either Kabuto or myself and we'll give you some more."
"Ookay..." I said, flicking a spider off one of the scrolls. Hopefully Kidomaru didn't see that.
"No."
"Suki, you need to wear it, its part of the uniform." Kabuto said.
"There is no way in hell that I'm wearing a freaking GIANT PURPLE PRETZEL on my back. Hell no." I snapped, my eye twitching. I had gotten all of my new uniform on (Mine was a shade lighter than Kidomaru's), but the belt. Of course, I modified it a bit. The shorts were a little longer than usual, seeing as I was... Well short. And I added bandages so hardly any part of my legs were showing. I also wore a shirt with long fishnet sleeves under the uniform so my arms were covered too. Fishnet is awesome. Let no one tell you otherwise.
"Suki-"
"No! If you think wearing a giant pretzel is so great then you prance around in it, and when Jirobo gets hungry he can just eat you. I'm not wearing it. That's final. Finis. Nu. Nope. Nada. The end."
He sighed, giving up. "Fine. But you need to wear a belt of some sort with it."
"I know, I know." I waved him off. "Don't worry 'bout a thing. Go back to doing whatever Kabuto's do." He shook his head and left the room.
I looked around at all the clothes that surrounded me, and grabbed a long piece of blood red material that was about two inches wide and tied it around my waist.
"Taa daa... Instant belt!" I grinned, walking out of the room. The sandals were cool. They made me feel taller! Yaaay!
"Tch, who else have you managed to piss off? I'm amazed Lord Orochimaru hasn't had you killed yet." I glared at the speaker. Sakon, of course.
"Shut up, lipstick boy. I'm amazed Orochimaru hasn't had your mouth sewn shut yet."
He growled. "Do you want me to kill you, bitch? Because it seems to me like you're asking for it."
I grinned. "Aww... Now you wouldn't want to kill your fellow Sound Shinobi would you?"
He blinked in confusion. "What do you...?"
"Look at my uniform, idiot. I'm a member of the Sound Five now. Or should I say Six?"
"W... What...? But you don't even have a curse mark!"
I stuck my tongue out. "Well I guess that means I can kick your ass without one."
He looked like he was going to say something else, but instead he just clenched his fists and turned around, walking away.
"Heh... Suki one, Sakon zero."
"Err... What are you doing...?"
I opened one eye to look at Tayuya. "Learning how to control my Chakra."
"By sitting under a tree..."
"Uh-huh."
"With a rock on your head..."
"Yeppers."
"And making a hand sign?"
I sighed, putting my hands down and taking the rock off my head. "According to the scrolls Kimimaro gave me it's the best way to learn." I rubbed my neck. "Ow."
She shook her head. "Tch. Maybe for Kimimaro it is. Then again, he's perfect at everything." She grabbed my arm and pulled me to my feet. "You do know there's a better way to do this, right?"
"Tell me pwease." I said, shooting her my best chibi look.
"Okay, okay, just stop looking at me like that. It's freakin creepy as hell... Follow." She led me around the nearby woods, looking up. Eventually she stopped in front of a particularly large tree.
"Don't tell me your gonna make me run up the tree." I moaned.
"No... Where's the motivation in that?" Tayuya asked, crossing her arms. "Noooo... You're doing something different. You see that branch?" She pointed to a long branch that stuck out about twenty feet from the tree. "You're going to run across that."
"Oh, that's not so ba-"
"Upside down."
"DA HELL?! COME AGAIN?!" I yelled in shock.
"Weell... If you run up a tree and mess up you fall on your ass, get laughed at, and try again... Right?"
I nodded. "Yeah..."
"BUT if you run upside down on a tree BRANCH and mess up then you'll fall on your head, and if you can't right yourself in time then you break your neck and die." She shrugged. "Two lessons in one."
I groaned, "But Tayuya... What if I really do fall on my head and dieeee...?"
"Then I'll come to your funeral. Now do you want to learn how to control your Chakra or not?"
Sighing, I walked over to the tree and looked up, trying to focus Chakra to my feet so I could jump. "I swear if I die because of this I'm going to haunt you for all eternity. And really piss you off. If you think I'm annoying now you should see me when I become a ghost-"
"Suki!"
"Alright... Alright... I'm going... Sheesh..." I jumped and landed shakily on the branch, still not used to the sensation of being able to jump fifty feet. I made the hand sign and sent more energy to my feet, then inched over to the edge of the branch, flipping over and sticking.
"O-okay... This is weird!" I yelled, running as fast as I could, trying to keep the Chakra amount even.
"What the... Heck is she doing?" Someone said.
I screamed, my concentration getting broken, and started to fall.
"HOLYSHITI'MGONNADIEI'MGONNADIEI'MGONNADIIIEEEEEEE!!!" Amazingly I managed to flip myself over and land on my feet. I got up, glaring at Kidomaru. "What da heck, man?!" I snapped. "I almost had it!"
"I've heard of people running up trees to learn how to control Chakra, but tree BRANCHES?"
"It was her idea!" I yelled, pointing to Tayuya. "Now if you'll excuse me, I got some tree climbing to do."
I jumped back up to the branch, focusing the Chakra to my feet and trying again.
"Hooray. You finally did it. And without dying. Amazing." Tayuya said, kicking me with her sandal.
"... Just leave me here to die." I muttered, panting and completely drained of Chakra.
"Come on, get the hell up already."
"No."
She sighed. "Fine. You can sit out here and starve to death."
I sat up. "Ya mean there's food inside?"
"Yep."
I blinked. "Pudding?"
"Sure...?"
I got up and ran as fast as I could. "!!!!!!!"
As soon as I got inside I ran into the kitchen, pushing a few other members of the Sound Six out of my way and yanking open one of the cabinets digging through boxes of random foodish things.
"What is she looking for?" I heard Kimimaro ask.
"Pudding." Tayuya replied in a tired voice.
"Ah-hah!" I yelled, pulling out a very dusty extra large box of pudding mix. "Success!"
I poured some of the mix into a bowl and added water, stirring. Then I grabbed a marker and wrote PROPERTY OF SUKI~~~ DO NOT TOUCH IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE AND CARKEYS~~~ on the box, sticking it back in the cabinet.
Then I walked into the living room and sat down on one of the multiple worn looking chairs, eating my pudding. I glared as Sakon walked in.
"Still alive I see." He said, sitting down with a bowl of something I really didn't want to know the contents of.
"Still an asshole I see." I shot back, sticking a spoonful of pudding in my mouth.
"Kidomaru says you almost fell on your head today."
"Yeah. So?"
He shrugged. "It's not like it would make any difference if you did."
I flipped him the bird.
"Tch. Well that's rude."
"Oh, and your the perfect example of politeness." I replied, the words dripping with sarcasm.
"Yeah, actually, I am!" Sakon said, glaring.
I rolled my eyes, eating another spoonful. "Whatever you say, lipstick boy, whatever you say."
"Don't call me that!" He growled.
"Then what do you want me to call you? Clown man? You look like a clown to me."
"Well I'm not, so shut the hell up!"
I grinned, knowing I was annoying the crap out of him. "Suki two. Sakon zippo."
"Since when were you the almighty score keeper?"
"Since this afternoon, when you ran off like the lipstick wearing chicken you are."
"I did not run off!" He yelled, glaring.
"Oh, really? 'Cuz it looked like it to me."
"Stop saying that!"
I stuck my tongue out. "La la la la la I can't heeeaarrr cchhoooo!"
"UGH!" He threw his arms up in the air. "I swear if you don't-"
"I know a song that annoys everyone and this is how it goes! I know a song that annoys everyone and this is how it goes! I know a song that annoys everyone and this is how it goes!"
"Heh... They argue like a married couple." I heard Kidomaru say.
Sakon and I both turned and glared at him. "SHUT UP!" We both screamed, then turned to each other. "YOU TOO!! UGH!"
"Heh... Last night was funny as hell." Tayuya said, ducking to avoid a kunai I had aimed at her head.
"Shuddup." I muttered, turning back to the target and chucking a shuriken at it.
"Well you DO have a talent for annoying him." She said, shrugging.
"Tch. Yeah, but we don't argue like a 'married couple'." I made air quotes around married couple. "So stupid…"
"Hey, I'm just throwing the facts out there. The more you hate someone the more likely you are to-"
I growled, throwing another kunai at her. My my, aren't I the violent one today. "If you're trying to play match maker, then don't even bother. It won't work."
She blinked. "Why? Do ya got a boyfriend back home or something?"
I laughed cruelly. "Tch. No. Back home I was just the weird freak girl no one talked to. I was just there for entertainment purposes, nothing more than an outlet to relive their boredom."
"Sounds like a bunch of assholes, if you ask me." Tayuya said, sitting down on a tree stump and crossing her arms. "What about your parents?"
"They didn't know anything about my school life, let alone about me. All they did was work. Work, work, work and ignore the small child. They probably haven't even realized I'm missing yet." I rolled my eyes, walking over to the target and ripping out the weapons with a little more force then was necessary. "Hell, I don't care. Who needs them? I basically raised myself, by myself."
"Erm... So is that why playing match maker won't work on you...?" She asked warily, probably realizing this was a touchy subject.
I stuck my tongue out. "You fall in love. Oh, yay, he luuuurves you back. Everything is happy happy for a while. You get married. Go on a romantic honeymoon. Blah, blah, blah, blah. Mushy, mushy, mushy. And then you fight. You say things. You hurt each other. You get a divorce. You end up being miserable. Perhaps you start to stalk them. Possibly get a restraining order filed on you. More being miserable. Depression sets in. Eventually you pick up your shredded emotions, super glue them back together and then the cycle starts all over again. Love sucks; I'll go without, thank you very much."
"Uh-huh. You talk like you got experience."
I blinked. Oh yeeaahh... I forgot... Tayuya's never gone through any of that...
"If you're wondering, no, I have never myself fallen in l-o-v-e before."
"Then how can you be so sure it sucks so badly?"
I shrugged. "'Cuz I've seen it happen too many times to count."
She rolled her eyes, then froze. "Oh shit."
"What is it...?" I asked.
"We just had a completely serious conversation. No freaking pudding was mentioned either!"
I glared.
Tayuya then had to duck and run like hell to avoid the onslaught of kunai, shuriken and rocks that followed. Hm. I need to work on my aim.
That night I sat in bed staring at the ceiling, not being able to sleep. It was late. I knew that much. I had stayed up longer than usual to watch Kidomaru play Tayuya in Shogi. The final score was Kidomaru three games, Tayuya two. Though the red-haired Kunoichi said she wanted a rematch, same time, same place tomorrow.
All in all though, today had been a pretty good day. I finally got the hang of using exploding tags and throwing weapons, and since the whole "You argue like a married couple" thing Sakon had done his best to avoid me.
I sighed, wondering how Cati was doing, and what the people at my high school thought about me disappearing. I wondered if they even cared, or if any of them realized the weird girl with the long brownish black hair and dark eyes hadn't been there to argue with the lunch lady. I wondered if my parents missed me.
Don't get me wrong, I liked being a sound ninja. It was fun to argue with Sakon, hang out with Tayuya and attempt to get Kimimaro to show emotion. Kidomaru and Jirobo were pretty cool to be around too. Even Kabbers had his moments. It was just at times like these, when I was all alone, that I felt homesick.
I rolled over so I faced the wall, knowing that I had to get some rest. Sleep good. Sleep now.
Tayuya promised me she would teach me basic jutsu tomorrow. And while her ways were... Usually life threatening... It worked out a lot better and faster than just going by the book.
Someday she is gonna kill me. I can see it now. Exploding tag accident kills fourteen year old girl, guts everywhere, right leg missing, cannibals suspected of thievery.
Hooray.
And with that pleasant mental image in my head, I closed my eyes and after a few minutes, fell asleep.
"What are you reading?" Tayuya asked looking over my shoulder.
Apparently when I was found in the woods I had my backpack with me, and it was, as usual, filled with manga. Strangely though, all my Naruto manga had disappeared.
"Bleach." I replied, showing her the cover. It was the one with Luppi.
"Who's the chick?"
"Luppi. And he's a guy." I told her, grinning a little.
"Damn. Who's the midget guy?" She asked, taking the book from me and flipping through the pages.
"Toshiro. He kicks arse. Listen, if you're really that interested in this I'll let you borrow the first volume."
"Okay." She said nodding as Sakon and Kidomaru ran into the room, yelling about Orochimaru and water.
"What da hell?" I asked, rasing an eyebrow.
"Lord Orochimaru finally agreed to let us go to the lake!" Sakon said, forgetting that he was supposed to be ignoring me. He turned around and disappeared, most likely going to tell the others.
"The lake...?" I asked, turning to Tayuya.
"Yeah… Ever since we got here those idiots have been begging Orochimaru to let us go to a lake that's less than a mile from here." She shrugged. "I don't really care; the only problem is Kabbers is probably going to force us to go along with them, to make sure they don't kill anyone."
I sighed. "Greeeat... Just what I need... Lipstick boy at the beach... Hey! Isn't it the freaking middle of fall?!" I realized, turning to her.
"Yep. Get ready for a miserable, freezing cold day at the beach."
"Oh joy."
Maybe if I'm lucky Sakon will get eaten by Jaws… Or Kisame...
Hey! I can dream, right?!
