Warning: OOC, weirdness, EMO-ness, sexual references and foul language. Any misspellings or wrong grammar is unintentional. I am my own beta. I could have missed some stuff.
OFFICEMATE
Kakashi managed to ground himself once more and fix a polite smile of indifference on his face, despite the amount of strain it was taking on his facial muscles. His mind was demanding and screaming to know who the pretty little lady was and why on earth was she standing too close to Iruka and managing to look like his goddamn wife.
Kakashi watched Iruka's paleness turn into an interesting shade of white somehow and felt a pang in his chest that he didn't think or imagine he'd feel if he ever did see Iruka again. It was stirring up his headache, making his hangover worse and somewhat managing to piss him off further. Everything was just starting to look very ugly to Kakashi and he couldn't stop the smile that was morphing in to a sneer he directed at the question the mild-mannered lady asked.
By some miracle, Genma chose to make an appearance then, clamping a hand firmly down on both Kakashi and Raidou's shoulders. "There you two are. Come on, she is waiting."
Kakashi could have worshipped Genma then and there and by the looks on Iruka's face, it seemed the younger man was so grateful for the distraction and quickly consoled the lady around his arm. "I'm not sure dear. We just bumped in to each other. Busy party and all."
Kakashi cleared his throat and fought to keep the smile and politeness in his face and voice (it was a losing battle). "I'm sorry again."
The apology came out strangled, almost desperate and clingy before Kakashi dipped his head towards Iruka, then once more to the lady and walked away from the couple. He felt sick to the pits of his being and whatever control he had on his stomach decided to fail then. How he managed to get from the hall to men's room without alarming anyone (and somewhat managing to keep that air of dignity and poise around himself), he wasn't sure. He picked the first cubicle, got on his knees and finally - with such relief that it was almost like a blessing - emptied his guts in to the toilet seat.
The sound of the lock turning somewhere between his mid-heaves made him aware of his two friends and teammates standing behind him, looking at him with something akin to pity and disappointment.
"Err you okay?" Genma managed to say, albeit awkwardly.
It was as clear as day that he wasn't okay (he was ever okay for the past year anyway) and that his stomach was not behaving. "Right. Rule number one when throwing home welcoming parties for Hatake Kakashi." Kakashi grumbled, grunted and spat a new round of semi-digested food and acids in to the toilet seat before cursing in seven different Fire dialects. "Never, ever, have Asuma bring any of his wife's food. Again!"
Somehow, much to Kakashi's relief, whatever pitying gaze that was lingering in Genma and Raidou's eyes vanished and was replaced with mirth as both of them turned away to hide their snickering. Nothing more was said about his run-in with Iruka, nor the other man's blatant denial of even knowing Kakashi at all.
For that, Kakashi was grateful.
XXX
Kakashi got the firmest handshake of the century when he finally managed to greet the Head - who looked stunning in her emerald designer green gown that shamelessly accentuated her large firm breasts and her smooth peachy skin pallor to everyone in that party hall. The crushing grip on his hand nearly left Kakashi weak on the knees because for a moment he really did think that his hand was a goner (it sure as hell felt like it). When Tsunade Hime wasn't busy entertaining people or discussing company politics (statistics, stocks and/or introducing Kakashi to everyone and making up small polite talks), she would turn to look at Kakashi sternly and glare the living hell out of him. If Kakashi was a lesser man, he would have cowered and peed a puddle then and there. The low-toned-hissing-scolding would have worked if her breasts weren't bouncing with every step or shoulder movement she made. The large mounds of flesh was enough to make any pervert get a hard-on and probably faint (because it was a heavenly sight), but Kakashi merely focused on them as a distraction from all the angry vibes she was radiating because in his opinion, boobs were better than the low-toned-hissing-scolding.
"And I will not tolerate any sort of shameful display in this party!" Tsunade mumbled, firmly and with no room for argument.
Kakashi's senses snapped up at her sentence and he redirected his gaze from her bouncy breasts to her irritated face. "What shameful display? Everything is going fine."
A man in a black suit and olive-green unbuttoned silk shirt approached Tsunade and greeted her, complimenting her looks and gown and what a success the orientation party was. Two other people (a middle aged woman that was literally glowing yellow from all the gold jewelry she donned on her wrists, neck and fingers and an elderly man who was apparently a successful journalist) came to make some more small talk before Tsunade turned to look at Kakashi once more to finally answer his hanging question. "Do not forget what a headache it was to actually sort out that restraining order. You will not come within a twenty foot radius close to that man and his fiancé."
He knew just who Tsunade was referring to (and he didn't need to be reminded twice; he didn't want to be hauled off by the court officers or any officer for that matter). Kakashi didn't think he heard right though because he blinked and stared at Tsunade even more. "I'm sorry, Tsunade-sama, but his what?"
Annoyed full red-lipstick-coated lips pursed to a thin line as she turned away from the person who greeted her while they made their way to their sitting table in the next hall for dinner to be served. Kakashi felt like a shell that was thrown hard against a wall and it must have showed in what little face he had exposed (since his hair was covering half of his face anyway) because whatever annoyance she felt quickly disappeared in to dawning understanding and mild confusion.
"I ordered Raidou to give you his file. You didn't read it, did you?" She asked, her young face falling and showing its true age. Kakashi knew it was her love and affection for him but he couldn't stop his face color from dropping a shade or two. The change in his facial color was all the answer she needed because she sighed tiredly and walked even faster to the table, arm hooked around Kakashi's in a sweet maternal way. "Sit down." She said, and Kakashi did just that, mind blank.
When a glass of strong red wine was all but shoved to his face, Kakashi snapped from his blank state of mind and blinked dumbly at the glass. He took it without question, downed it without question then turned to look up at Tsunade, shrugging. "It's good wine."
"Of course it is. I chose it myself." She answered, kindly not dwelling on the subject of Iruka and his 'fiancé'.
Tsunade sat down beside him, later on joined by Jiraiya's presence and soon by Raidou and Genma. They were acting as her bodyguards and escorts, Jiraiya as her right-hand man (the woman being Shizune herself) and the only man missing was Ibiki (and that was because the man never attended social gatherings because he really, really hated it. People got scared too). Kakashi listened to the music play, to the socializing mundane chatter of people around him as he carefully stored nitbits of conversation that he deemed useful information in his brain, scanning the room from his sitting positioned while he sipped his wine.
"Enjoy the wine, boys. It's for free." Jiraiya grinned, raising his glass to Kakashi and his other two comrades. Tsunade didn't look very impressed and remained tight-lipped about the joke.
Starters was served as he watched the headmistress of the Naruto's school chatter cheerfully with a bunch of men her age, obviously looking like a woman who wanted to take someone home with her that night (and hoping that it'd be a good catch). Kakashi was glad for their table's positioning because it was an advantage to him (and judging by how Genma and Raidou were focused on their surroundings, they seem to share the same opinion) since he could see the entire dining hall clearly without straining his neck too much and looking so obvious. Lip reading was a bummer but in a room so crowded and with targets so many, Kakashi felt that he and his other two comrades (and he secretly knew that Tsunade, especially Jiraiya were in on the lip-reading as well) were doing an excellent job of pretending to be stuck up elites in a sparkling party of expensive wine and food with names he can't seem to memorize.
He moved on to the next table, studying the school vice principal and his wife, who were busily chatting happily with the manager of the accounts department of the school (a middle aged man and his rather sweet looking mistress), laughing and pouring each other wine. Their conversation was dull and Kakashi merely lingered with their lip movements for a few more minutes before moving to the next table. He wasn't really sure if they were his targets on the list or not having not read the list himself, but the room wasn't that big and he figured he'd read everyone instead of just the ones on the list.
It was a standard re-evaluation procedure before the new school year started. Although Kakashi knew that most of them were loyal to a T, precautions were still necessary. Routine check never killed anyone even if it was starting to really get boring hearing the same conversation over and over again, knowing that they weren't plotting anything judging by their postures, gestures and the way their eyes moved when they spoke. Kakashi poured himself another glass of wine and blinked several times since his eye was being strained far too much from all the staring (and he knew he looked very handsome when he stared at people) and lip reading.
"I don't give a bloody damn if his son graduated medical school or if that new therapeutic massage is out or how the stocks have dropped. Why are they all talking about the same thing?" Genma mumbled quietly, glaring at the starter-plate before him. He chewed on one of the fancy bread-like thing with what Kakashi was assuming was cheese and continued acting like a prat. "Got anything useful?"
Kakashi shook his head. "One of them is pondering the prospect of test-tube babies."
Raidou cleared his throat immediately, because Tsunade was starting to glare at the both of them and Jiraiya snickering wasn't helping things either. "You two." Raidou warned.
Kakashi didn't blame him because despite the fact that Kakashi was the 'leader' of the mission group (even though they were rather divided in terms of task assignment), it was Raidou who dealt with the politics that is the Head's temper and wrath in the end. Kakashi got his fair verbal head butting but he always managed to weasel out of it somehow and in the end, Tsunade would pick Raidou who took every verbal assault and lecture like the honorable man that he was; he would remain silent and ashamed of the fact that despite their experiences, they still got lectured. After that, Kakashi would be on the other end of Raidou's wrath along with Genma who always seemed to be the fuel to the fire.
And judging by how the pleasant expressions were completely gone from Raidou and Genma's faces, Kakashi knew that they were at it again. He also noticed how absent minded he was being; he missed the entire argument and it was such a shame because Raidou was flushed and Genma was gritting his teeth. It was going to get nasty and Kakashi was going to stop it. "Hey, hey, look. They have a different kind of wine."
"You two, wrap it up before I fire you myself. And I'll take your health insurance while I'm at it." Tsunade warned, smile all but strained on her face.
Genma huffed in his seat, turning his head slightly away from Raidou and went about lip reading whoever else was left on his list. Raidou apologized quietly and sighed. Kakashi almost - almost - felt sorry for him (and he never really blamed him for his lectures because if anything, Raidou deserves that much for all the brute and horrible word lashing he gets from the Head on their behalf). He also almost felt like slamming Genma's head in to the plate of whatever-bread-thing in front of him because Kakashi was pretty sure that even someone as dense as their upcoming company heir (that is Naruto) would know that Raidou was smitten over Genma and that Genma was being a complete corpse about it (however unintentional it was).
Sipping his wine and leaning back comfortably and smugly against the soft red velvet dining chair, Kakashi crossed his legs and continued to scan through the room, storing tidbits of information that he found useful and sometimes lingering a little too long in to a conversation when he found it amusing (like the group of secretaries from the administration department were giggling and tittering over the new Icha-Icha movie, the sight and apparently soft and quietly spoken words was tickling Kakashi's toes; it's not everyday he finds a group of females discussing such dirty bed tactics in a formal event and in polite speech to boot).
"Keep smiling to yourself like that and Ibiki is going to take you under his own microscope." Genma warned, not batting an eyelash as he pretended to be watching the orchestra performance when instead, he was watching someone's table (obviously).
"Oh it's nothing. Just that there's a bunch of cute little women over there talking about the several uses of a butt plug." Kakashi said calmly and with enough control that it sounded rather dignified (and almost princely) if not for the content of the sentence itself.
"Ahh, my new Icha-Icha movie hit. It seems like that butt plug scene has caused quite a stir with the female population. In this magazine survey, it showed that statistics were actually -" Jiraiya was cut off abruptly just then. Judging by how Tsunade gave a slight jerk off her seat, Kakashi just knew that even Jiraiya's expensive leather shoes could not withstand the strength of the Tsunade's powerful heal-stump. "Anyway." Jiraiya cleared his throat, a bit of a wince in his expression. "A toast then. To successful written art and to women cheering on such successful written art."
Kakashi laughed, picked up his glass. "I'll drink to that."
"Yup. Same here." Genma grinned, raising his half empty glass. "You gotta love those books. I swear, there's not a woman I haven't done that doesn't even know the basics of Icha-Icha. For you, Jiraiya-sama."
Kakashi's eyes darted automatically to Raidou who remained unhindered by the words exchanged across their round table and merely lifted his glass more out of respect to Jiraiya rather than anything else. For some strange reason that Kakashi himself will never understand, he raised his own glass and looked directly at Raidou. "And to us." He said.
He was glad for the almost-startled blink Raidou directed at him before Kakashi gave him a small smile and flickered his gaze to other at the table, implying that the toast was to them as well (and their terrible hectic jobs). He did not miss the slight confused look on Genma's face nor did he miss the lingering look Genma directed towards Raidou (while being very subtle).
Tsunade broke the ice and raised her glass then. "To us. For real. Heavens know how much luck and blessings we'll need to see this year through."
Kakashi gave a quiet snort at the statement (as did the others) and went about looking on to the next table in his field of vision. He was caught by surprised when he realized that he was staring the pretty, cute little brunette that was accompanying Iruka earlier. He narrowed his visible eye and took in the sight of the woman; she was petite and had full breasts that highlighted her curves and showed off her shapely legs from the slits of the gown on one side. She looked pretty average if not for her seemingly fit figure. Her eyes were wide and brown, with a pair of slender eyebrows and a heart shaped face with small cupid bow lips. Her blue gown and the crystal hair clips holding her light brown hair were mere accessories that showed off her natural beauty. She wasn't wearing brightly colored lipstick or dark shades of varying eye shadows like all the other women in the dining hall, but she was beautiful in that neighborly, friendly way.
He watched her smile then laugh as her fingers curled around another hand that was resting on a pair of black slacks and for a moment, Kakashi flinched at the sight of the silver band, encrusted with small diamonds resting perfectly in place on her slender right ring finger. The sight of the engagement ring made his chest suddenly feel heavy, like that one time during a dirty mission when he caught a bullet that punctured his lung. The feeling of drowning, heavy weight and nausea was taking over his mind again just by staring at the simple looking ring.
By instinct, his eyes traveled upwards, following the owner of the hand the woman was holding. He followed the black sleeve of the tux, took note of the handsome looking blue tie and wonderfully matching blue blazer and visibly frowned at the missing ponytail. He stared at the slender neck, following it up to get a good view of a tanned profile, eye sweeping over the scar that he grew to love so much and more over the past year before he settled for Iruka's dazzling smile. His mind clouded as he watched Iruka chatter and laugh with his fiancé, along with Izumo and Kotetsu (which he found surprising because he didn't think that those two were employed by the company as well), all of them munching on their starter's plate and sipping wine and cocktails.
The noise and chatter around him disappeared in to a distant hum in the background and for that precious few minutes, it was only him and Iruka who was meters away that existed. Iruka looked livelier and not the small, tired and almost raggedly dorm mate and mission target he remembered from a year ago. He looked like he put on just a bit of weight, his cheeks glowing with health and his shoulders more square (rather than narrow and slightly hunched). The short boyish haircut and unmanageable bangs that dropped over his forehead made him look more serious, more handsome and definitely mature. The missing long locks of chocolate brown made the blood in his veins boil with anger because one of the things he fell hard for was Iruka's long hair, and how they'd brush against his chest after they had sex, after a make out session or when he's just holding him in general. He remembered how they felt on his fingers, and how they'd slide off them like silk, leaving behind a smell of fruity-fusions that was Iruka's favorite shampoo. Seeing Iruka with his short hair and him looking healthier, stronger and surer of himself that very moment was all the hint Kakashi needed to know that he was gone, unreachable and that he had seriously moved on.
It was a slapping reminder to him that what transpired between himself and Iruka was nothing more than a mission and that it'd remain a mission, just like his current one. He felt his insides turn to ash, the taste of wine in his mouth turn to bitter acid and his covered eye throb with pain when the pretty woman slid her hand off Iruka's to reach for her glass. At that moment, the silver engagement ring on Iruka's right ring finger twinkled for the whole world to see.
He wasn't sure what happened, but there was a bit of a clatter and then there was a firm warm hold on his hand. Kakashi blinked twice and looked at the table, where his hand was being held tightly by Raidou because it was trembling too much (and Kakashi knew it was because the angry green monster was letting its poison flow freely in his veins again). His glass had toppled over on the table cloth, the remaining amount of wine spilling against the white linen and staining it a bright red. Confused, he looked up to find Raidou looking at him worriedly, Genma staring at him while Tsunade and Jiraiya looked partially alarmed.
His stomach churned then and Kakashi felt whatever color he had in his face drain away. "Sorry."
"You all right?" Raidou asked, casually tipping the fallen wine glass back in to place before tossing the napkin on his lap over the spilled stain.
Kakashi cleared his throat, keeping a straight and calm face with as much bravado as he could currently muster at that point. "Yeah, fine. The wine, it's pretty strong isn't it?"
Genma merely nodded. "Totally. I mean, it's pretty good that you don't even know if you've -" The glass Genma was holding tipped over just then, and it would have looked natural if Kakashi knew it wasn't intentional. "Uh, you know, I think I got what you got." Genma said and grinned when Jiraiya started laughing at the poor attempt to assure Kakashi that it was okay.
The table laughed at Genma's lame joke; as lame as it was, Kakashi greatly appreciated it and laughed along with them.
"Drop your missions, all of you." Tsunade announced, blinking back the tears of mirth from her eyes. "Just sit back and enjoy the food. The funding for this party was quite an amount, so stuff yourselves."
Kakashi felt slightly miffed because he knew perfectly well why Tsunade was asking them all to drop their lip-reading-surveillance-jig. It was his fault for being too hung up and he hated the pity hidden under the casual dinner and I-paid-a lot-for-this act. While he normally trusted Tsunade's judgment, he hated feeling so weak against what was apparently a previously failed mission. Tsunade asking everyone to drop their current task was a mere reminder of just how powerless he was against Iruka and just how hard he's fallen for him (and still is).
The main course was served and Kakashi asked for another glass of wine to down it all in one go before asking for another one. Everyone busied themselves with their fancy dinner while he poked at what he's assuming was a piece of mushroom on his white and gold porcelain plate, before his gaze started wandering about the room again. Automatically, he settled for watching Iruka eat while he listened and spoke to his friends and fiancé and sometimes laugh in between, covering his mouth with his napkin when he did so. He asked himself why he was tormenting his already shattering heart by watching Iruka look happy with his friends and fiancé when he knew clearly that he had no place in the other man's life; he couldn't answer his own question. He just kept watching and the more he did, the more his covered eye throbbed with pain, drilling the migraine to the back of his head till he had to fight his own facial muscles to stop himself from wincing. Iruka's fiancé reached up with her finger and wiped a smear of something off the corner of Iruka's lips and that was all he could take.
Kakashi's fork dropped on the table with a careless clatter and he gave Tsunade and Jiraiya a shaky smile. "Uh, restroom. The wine and yesterday's pasta, not so good. Excuse me."
He didn't bother to wait for an answer as he pushed his chair back, dropped his napkin on the table and casually strode out of the dining hall towards the men's restroom. No one seemed to pay him any mind as he walked out because he didn't looked rushed or in some sort of trouble. Kakashi mentally patted himself in the back for managing to look poised and somewhat dignified until he reached the empty men's room outside in the lobby.
The splash of cold water against his pale and hot face was a slap back to reality and suddenly, he was very angry and very bitter about everything. His throat tightened with his suppressed emotions as he started to clench and unclench his hands several times, allowing the rush of the open tap to fill his head instead of the several screaming questions about Iruka's current life. He breathed through his nose, counting numbers in his head and still it was no use. He splashed more water against his face and started soaping his hands just to distract himself with something. He didn't give a damn if the hotel ran on a soap shortage, he kept using the soap till his hands disappeared in a rich white lather and they turned in to an unhealthy shade of pink because he was rubbing his hands together too hard.
He heard the door to the men's room open and heard the lock turn as well. He didn't have to look up from his soapy hands to know that it was Raidou who walked in. The man's warmth and presence filled the small room and Kakashi automatically felt at ease at the brotherly and friendly aura that was Raidou. The man didn't say anything and leaned against the marble sink, quietly crossed his arms across his chest and stared at a spot on the floor. Kakashi knew why he was there and what he was told to do but he wasn't going to acknowledge it because he was hell bent on finishing the bathroom's liquid soap (all six soap-pump). Pruney hands be damned, the soap smelled good and fruity and he was nearly done with half of one of the soap-pumps.
At his childish train of thought, Kakashi stopped lathering almost immediately (and even caused Raidou to look up from the spot on the floor). "Kakashi?" Raidou asked softly, taking a step closer. "You all right?"
Kakashi wanted to scream at his face that no, he wasn't fucking all right but instead, more out of habit, he kept calm on the outside and started rinsing his hands instead. His inner self was screaming and throwing a wild tantrum over why do soaps have to smell fruity and what is it with soap-companies and their affinity and obsession with fruit-based stuff. "I just realized that I hate the smell of fruits." It was a lie that was turning in to the truth because if anything, Kakashi loves fruits (and Raidou knew that, being the one responsible to filling the fruit basket in Kakashi's apartment because Kakashi forgot to feed himself most of the time).
"I see." Raidou answered in his quiet manner and casually plucked one of the folded disposable towels from the rack in the corner. "I suppose you'd want to get rid of the fruit basket at home?"
"Yes." Kakashi nodded, finally turning the tap off the cringing at just how fruity his hands smelled like. He took the offered towel and dried his hands with it. "Do you think fruits smell good?"
Kakashi stared right in to Raidou's dark eyes, noting how careful Raidou was being in answering the silly question. "Yes," Raidou finally said, and nodded. "I do think it smells good. Don't you?"
"Sometimes." Kakashi said, remembering Iruka's favorite shampoo and his previously long dark hair. "But now, I don't really think so."
Raidou nodded in understanding. "I know."
Kakashi's shoulders tightened a little as his bitterness got the better of him. Raidou was a presence he greatly respected at the same time a presence he could be a bit 'loose' around. It wasn't a whirlwind of 'I shouldn't have' or 'I can't' when it was around Raidou, because Kakashi knew that Raidou somehow managed to settle himself somewhere in his being and will always be a part of him. He was his first instructor, first commander and first friend and probably a million other firsts. Being in the business since he was a child, it was a miracle that Kakashi even had someone like Raidou. Which was why when he sent his fist flying against the wooden dividers of the toilet cubicles, Raidou said nothing and didn't even bat an eyelash. Kakashi punched it once, twice, thrice, until the wooden splinters dug in to his fist and an admirable hole sat in the middle of the smooth lacquered wood.
Somehow, seeing the small hole calmed him a bit, but the anger was still there and so was the unending selfishness about how life was always unfair. Everything happening to him was probably just karma for all those people he killed swiftly because it was his job and all the people he deceived because he was ordered to. His heart thumping wildly in his chest, Kakashi dropped his bleeding fist to his side, dropping his head a bit as he sucked in deep breaths to calm himself a bit. Of course, it did nothing to calm him down or make the anger and envy go away; if anything, his forced-calm-demeanor just made it worse.
"I'm going back. Sorry." He mumbled quietly, swallowing the thick lump in his throat.
"I'm taking you home." Raidou said, a calm and warm hand circling his own bleeding fist and wrapping it with a disposable towel. "Come on. I think Tenzou left the groceries on the kitchen counter."
Like a young boy having his older brother take him home after he scraped his knee during playtime, Kakashi merely nodded and followed Raidou out of the hotel and remained quiet and in pain, despite the calm bravado he maintained on the outside.
XXX
Upon reaching the miraculously organized and neat apartment (Kakashi knew that Tenzou and Genma must have conned the men in to turning the jungle state it was in the morning in to the hospital-cleanliness that is in front of him), Raidou disappeared in to the bathroom and Kakashi threw himself on the couch, kicking his shoes off in the process; the pair of expensive leather clattering on the marble floor in a heap. His slightly bleeding hand remained wrapped in the hotel's disposable towel. It wasn't as if it was bleeding profusely, but more like some of the wooden splinters scratched a bit too deep. If anything the bleeding stopped somewhere during their wait in the traffic jam in which Kakashi remained completely oblivious too and actually did bother eating the free brownie from the diner in the middle of nowhere earlier.
"Sit up and give me your hand." Raidou said, breaking the silence of the apartment with his voice and moving to kneel in front of Kakashi.
Kakashi remained perfectly still, Raidou's closeness no longer bothering him because he was so used to it. His hand remained on his knee as Raidou quickly and efficiently plucked out all the splinters with a pair of tweezers, occasionally squeezing or pushing the metallic thing too hard in order to get the smallest wooden needles out of his sore hand. It didn't take as long as it should and by the time Raidou was done applying some salve on his scratched up hand, Kakashi's stomach chose that moment to grumble in a rather undignified manner.
"Look, I'm gonna pop myself in to bed and sleep on this. You look tired yourself, crash over if you want. I think this is a sofa bed. Hell you know what's in this apartment more than I do anyway. I'm going to get my dogs tomorrow. I need some sleep." Kakashi mumbled, pushing himself off the couch. The hand on the back of his knee stopped him and he looked down at Raidou. "What?"
"Drop the mission."
Kakashi could see the concerned look behind Raidou's dark eyes and shook his head. "No, I need this."
"Are you some sort of masochist?" Raidou asked, standing his full height.
Kakashi wondered about that himself and shrugged nonchalantly. He was going to have to act indifferently about the subject because even if it was Raidou who saw his rounds and bouts of control loss, he personally didn't like to make a habit out of it (although Raidou was already part of the habit more than anything). "I'm going to get used to him and one day move on."
"He hasn't moved on, Kakashi." Raidou said, sighing tiredly.
"No he has." Kakashi started walking away from the living room towards his bedroom to change. "He's getting married soon and his fiancé is beautiful. If that doesn't scream 'I've moved on' then I don't know what does. Maybe the engagement ring helps. They look expensive."
He didn't wait for Raidou to show himself out of the apartment or to get himself comfortable on what he assumed was a sofa bed. He dragged his feet to the bathroom and filled the bathtub with hot water and dunked himself in to the tub, Icha-Icha book in one hand while the scratched one hanging out and resting against the closed lid of the toilet seat. He was so engrossed with the writings on the book, reading them but not really absorbing the words that he lost track of time. The next thing he knew, there was a hand on his shoulder and said hand was shaking him awake.
"Get out of the tub." Raidou said, dressed in his undershirt and his tuxedo slacks with a pair of house slippers. "Water is cold." Kakashi blinked at the sight of the small patch of wrinkled skin on Raidou's bare shoulder. He watched as the shoulder muscles shifted when Raidou fished something out from the water. "And you just ruined your book by the way." He said, an amused smile on his face as he dangled the sopping wet Icha-Icha book in front of Kakashi's face.
"Shit." Kakashi grumbled, and slapped a pruney hand to his face.
"Get dressed. Come to the kitchen if you're not sleepy. There's food."
Raidou left him to wash up, taking his wet book along with him. Kakashi shivered as he pushed himself off the tub, plucking the tub-stopper with his toes before rinsing himself with the shower head. He came out of the bathroom shivering like a wet kitten, toes curled up as he left water prints on the floor of his bedroom, trekking around naked and dripping water everywhere. He crouched by his unpacked duffel bag and sifted through the messy content from where he hesitantly stuffed all his clothing in, looking for a pair of boxers to cover his skin.
He managed to pull one out of the bag with strength enough to rip even the bag itself and sent the elastic-like piece of fabric sailing across the room, landing on the headboard of his bed. Grounding his teeth together, Kakashi stood up and stalked for the piece of underwear when his toe caught against the foot of the bed, effectively stubbing it black and blue and causing his tongue to let slip a very loud and colorful curse word. What followed that was a string of expletives towards everything that required a foot (such as the bed) and him hopping around like a crazed buffoon, stark naked and freezing in the air-condioned room.
"Stupid, fucking, son of a - damn this all to hell!" Kakashi growled and aimed a kick at one of the boxes lying innocently against one of the walls. He cursed even louder when his stubbed toe came in to contact with the pointed edge of the box and started limping and semi-jumping around once again, hissing at the pain shooting up his leg.
His bedroom door flew open and Raidou stood their, an apron around his waist and his undershirt sporting a large stain, worried and eyes wide. "What the hell is - oh god! Kakashi!"
"What?" Kakashi yelled, flopping down on his bed that now thankfully had a bedspread on (he had a feeling Raidou was responsible for it) and lifting his foot over his knee, examining his red toes while he tugged them apart from each other. "It's not like you haven't seen me naked before! Stop being such a pussy."
Raidou stomped in and threw a pair of sweatpants that Kakashi had no idea where he pulled it out from (more like, which box). "Put some clothes on! I may have seen you naked a thousand times, but that doesn't mean I get any pleasure seeing you jump around with your dick bouncing up and down like some fucking sports-ball!"
Kakashi stopped trying to look between his toes, pulled his legs slightly apart to glance at his dick then looked up at Raidou. "They are balls, Raidou!"
"Get dressed before you catch a cold!" He turned to the air conditioner and switched it off. "And how many times did I tell you stop prancing around under the air-conditioning when you're wet and naked? You do know that I end up being your nanny when you're sniveling under the blankets like some wet chick. Get dressed, now!"
"Getting dressed. Getting dressed." Kakashi grumbled, finally getting to his feet and plucking the underwear off the headboard. He looked down at himself then questioningly at Raidou. "Hey Raidou, can I ask you something?"
Raidou stopped midway from opening the bedroom door. "What?"
"Is my dick big?"
The door slamming was the only answer Kakashi received. He couldn't stop himself from shaking his head in amusement as he pulled his underwear on before taking the sweatpants Raidou threw at him earlier. He came out a few minutes later to find Raidou standing in front of the middle-kitchen-counter (it was a very nice kitchen. The preparing and eating marble counter was in the middle of the impressively large kitchen), tossing salt over a large tray of fries. Kakashi peered over Raidou's shoulder from where he was standing by the doorway and found that the fryer (that was installed in to the marble counter just like the baking oven, the gas range and the coffee maker) was still sizzling with what he assumed to be more potatoes.
Raidou looked up at him, not stopping in his tossing-salt movements, and gestured with his chin towards the kitchen stool. "Eat." He ordered, as Kakashi slid down and two bowls were pushed towards him - one filled with yellow goop and the other with white-going-on-orange goop.
"I think you peeled too many potatoes." Kakashi said, plucking some fries off the tray and dipping it in to the yellow goop, all the while watching Raidou from his mop of wet hair as the older man scooped out the fries from the fryer in to a new plate.
Although Raidou acted like there was nothing wrong, Kakashi knew that once Raidou busied himself in the kitchen and started making too much food, something was definitely wrong. Through out the years, Kakashi found out that while Raidou was a blessing in the kitchen (especially to those who couldn't cook), he also found out that the reasons for him working in the kitchen could vary from a few or a single hurtful sentence spoken on impulse or when someone was hurt, in critical condition or off to the funeral parlor. He couldn't forget the time Hayate died. Raidou prepared a large meal that would put even the Hyuuga's banquet to shame. He also spent the day peeling onions, getting all teary eyed and hunched over the chopping board.
Everyone knew better than to ask if it was the onions, or Hayate's death that was making him teary eyed. Kakashi knew, though, that it was Genma's grief that shook Raidou to his very core. The kitchen was basically Raidou's personal heaven to sulk like a child, curse like a sailor or mourn for the dead.
Kakashi knew it was better to say nothing and so he didn't. He ate the fries instead, and polished off the bowl of honey mustard Raidou was so good at preparing and even asked for seconds. Raidou prepared it without question, pushing him the new bowl of yellow goop before sitting down himself and eating.
The quiet atmosphere of the kitchen was broken when Raidou's cell phone started ringing from the living room. Kakashi didn't look up from the tray of fries in front of him as Raidou left the kitchen to answer the call. He could hear Raidou's smooth and calming voice drifting in to the kitchen and with the tone and flat answers, Kakashi knew that he can expect to be well fed for the next several days and have good cooked food stocked in his fridge.
"Yes. No. No! It's not like that! Where is this coming from? No! Hey, I don't give a flying fuck what you do in your spare time, how you dare accuse me of such - shut the fuck up! Fine! No, I don't have time for this. You're right. Fine. Okay. Okay."
He idly wondered if he could ask for a sandwich. Raidou made brilliant sandwiches just like how he knitted magnificent top quality table-cloth. As much as he didn't want to hear one side of the conversation (in which Raidou was starting to get really, really angry), he couldn't help but hear as Raidou's voice nearly crack in the living room.
"Where is this coming from? How can you think that? Of course not! It's different! So I care a bit more about people that you would, but what the bloody fuck do you think - excuse me?"
Kakashi frowned and got up, wanting to distract himself because Raidou was starting to say uncomfortable things. He pulled the fridge door open and found molded dim sums sitting inside neatly stacked tupperwares. He picked one at random and started searching the kitchen for the steamer that he knew was somewhere.
"My fault? My fault? This is your fault! You and your pathetic excuse of what you call fun! I - No, I didn't tell him yet! Yes, yes, I know! I will! For crying out loud, where is this all coming from? What are you trying to prove this time?"
He failed to locate the steamer and decided against cooking the dim sum. He carelessly tossed the tupperware back in to the fridge and started taking out whatever sandwich ingredient he could make. He spotted a jar of pickles and wondered if it'd make a good combination with mayonnaise and tuna. He suddenly had a strong urge to have some tuna. He was idly toying with what to put in his sandwich when he remembered that Iruka liked his tuna sandwich with an odd combination of ground sweet onions, pickle relish, cheddar cheese and honey mustard. Looking at the ingredients on the floor beside the fridge from where he was crouching, he realized, with a pang in his chest, that he took out exactly what Iruka would want to have if he were to eat tuna sandwich at that very instant.
The can of tuna in his hand trembled and was dropped carelessly to the floor. He shoved everything he took out back in to the fridge and opting to have something else instead. He was starving and a tray of fries was not going to do him justice. Whatever desire he had for tuna left the roof and he felt eyes on his back as he hurriedly stuffed the things back in to the fridge.
"Is there something you want to eat right now? Anything! You can ask for a goddamn fucking wedding cake and I'll gladly bake it for you right now." Raidou asked, looking like a wild bull ready to go on a rampage.
Kakashi knew that there was only one person who could make Raidou lose so much control that his glare would freeze hell ten times over and actually make babies cry. He could demand something extravagant and he'd know that he was doing Raidou a huge favor; he was shameless with his reply.
"Home made ramen?"
TBC
Uhhh Credits and notes:
- Nothing really to credit here except maybe for the kitchen's interior. A friend of mine (and you know yourself, Beeki) has an awesome kitchen with a preparing counter on the middle of. And because I like it so much, I used her kitchen as Kakashi's kitchen.
- I apologize for the LONG delay of updating. I hit a block so big that I couldn't write for several days.
As usual, I'd love to know what you think. The number of support I get for this is blinding and heartwarming. I love you so much. Never thought that it'd be a hit like this.
Special dedication to Vescas and Senna as an apology (and because I got scolded TT).
