Hey everyone! Welcome to chapter two! Thanks for the wonderful compliments on the first chapter. I'm so excited that everyone seems to be enjoying it.

This chapter may seem to not move the story along much, but I thought the scenario was just too amusing. I also felt that it gave a good insight into the kind of person that Remus is. I hope you all enjoy it!

***WARNINGS***

Some foul language

Enjoy!


Remus had been grateful that he'd been able to lose Lily after she started in on him again, but now he was suddenly missing her company. It was already Hogsmeade Saturday and he was doomed to spend the visit with Wormtail, his would-be girlfriend Helena, and Helena's friend Debbie. Suicide had cross Remus' mind when he realized that his friend was leading them down the alley that would take them, inevitably, to Madame Puddifoot's Teashop. Remus had been inside the shop once before, but not to sit snuggling up with a girlfriend. He'd been sent in to rescue Sirius who had been drug in by his, then current, girlfriend. He had broken up with her very soon after that particular incident.

He'd never wanted to be a customer, but there he was, sitting at a cramped, heart shaped table listening to Helena and Debbie chattering excitedly with each other about how adorable the décor was. Remus considered punching himself in the face to dull the pain that their shrill giggling was causing him, but decided instead to focus on the menu.

"Oh! Even their tea flavors are cute!" Trilled Helena as she followed suit.

"Look, Helly, rose tea. It's your favorite, isn't it?" Peter asked, trying to sound suave.

"You are so cute for remembering, Peter." She said, batting her eyelashes at him over her pink menu.

"They have lilac tea also. I love how delicate all these flavors are." Debbie said happily before sidling up closer to Remus, brushing her shoulder against his arm. "Don't you think floral teas are so romantic?" She asked, her lashes mimicking Helena's.

"I hate floral teas." Remus said gloomily, trying desperately to find something that could be considered real tea on the menu, loathing every heart that dotted every 'I' on the page.

"Oh." Said Debbie disappointedly.

"No need to be such a sour puss." Helena sneered, annoyed that Remus had not seemed very interested in her friend.

Remus chose to ignore her comment, trying desperately to find something he would actually drink. He remembered Helena and Debbie now that he'd seen them. He had shared a few classes with them several years ago, but once he moved to advanced classes their paths rarely crossed, save for a few encounters in the Gryffindor common room. He also remembered why Sirius had said that Debbie was a nightmare. Early in their sixth year the two had dated for a very brief period, though, as Sirius usually did, he broke it off with her after a few weeks. Debbie had not taken it well. They often found notes and letters folded into intricate hearts and flowers scattered about their dorm, and Sirius received one at nearly every meal, accompanied with intense staring from down their table. According to Sirius, she had stalked him rather thoroughly for several weeks after the breakup. If Remus had been paying closer attention he would have been terrified by the looks of adoration that she was sending his way. They were the same looks that she had always given Sirius.

"Hello cuties." said the waitress who finally meandered toward them.

She was an older woman who looked as though her head lived permanently in the clouds. She took out a small notepad in the shape of kissy lips.

"What can I get you?" She asked, poised with her pink, fluffy quill.

"Rose tea, please." Helena said, obviously trying to sound dainty.

"I'll have the same." Peter said, smiling at Helena as he absently handed the menu to the waitress.

"Lemon drop tea, please." Debbie said airily, turning her eyes on Remus again, looking almost expectant.

"Can I get just a plain Irish breakfast tea or something? Earl grey, plain black tea? Please, just anything plain." He was practically begging, though the waitress just nodded distractedly as she scribbled on the notepad. "And a slice of the chocolate cake, please." Remus finished as he handed the menu back.

When the waitress had wandered away Remus looked back at the table, and was shocked to find everyone staring at him. Debbie looked particularly offended, possibly because he had not ordered the same tea she had. Remus didn't really understand, and didn't really care.

"What?" He asked after a moment of silence.

"Oh, nothing. Just admiring your manners is all." Helena said sarcastically, turning her eyes to the décor again.

Things were awkwardly quiet for a few moments, even Peter giving Remus a dirty look, annoyed that he was ruining the mood of the date. Remus couldn't stop thinking about what he was missing out on, though. Sirius and James were probably through at Honeydukes already and on their way to Zonko's. Maybe they'd even stopped for a snow ball fight. He hated that he was stuck in the stuffy tea house on a snow day in Hogsmeade. On days like this, when they were finished with their shopping they would sometimes go to the outskirts of town and build snow forts. He always liked when they split into teams of two and he and Sirius were on a team together. Even surrounded by snow, Remus always felt hot when they were hunkered down in their hand dug foxhole together. He loved the proximity they had on days like this. But instead of rubbing shoulders and legs with Sirius, he was being rubbed by Debbie, who smelled too strongly of perfume.

"Are you fond of chocolate, Remus?" Debbie's voice suddenly broke through his daydreaming.

"Huh? Oh, um, yes, I suppose." Remus said uninterestedly.

"You suppose?" Peter laughed, trying to get the atmosphere a bit more lively. "I've seen this boy eat one of those foot long Honeydukes bars in one sitting."

"Oh my goodness." Debbie said in a voice that was far too intentionally delicate. "And you're in such good shape, too. I'm so envious. Chocolate makes me gain so much weight." She said, obviously fishing for a compliment.

"Is that so?" Remus said as he saw the waitress making her way toward them with a tray, causing him to miss the look of disgust that Helena shot him.

Remus finally felt a swell of excitement as the waitress placed a small plate in front of him, the slice of cake looking huge in comparison. It looked perfect and moist and rich. Remus could feel his mouth watering, that is until she sat his heart shaped tea cup down next to it. Before he could speak she was gone, and he was left staring at the rose petals that had been cut into tiny hearts floating around in his tea. A quick glance told him that it had not just been a mix up of cups. Remus hated floral tea.

"Oh, how cute." Debbie said, looking into Remus' cup. "They're cut into hearts."

Remus couldn't stop his groan of disapproval, but drown his sorrows in his cake, that proved to be as delicious as it looked. For a moment he forgot everything, as often happened when he was indulging in chocolate. Somehow, the sensory combination always left his mind wonderfully blank. Just as he was getting to the place he loved to be when he ate chocolate, Debbie's high, overly airy voice interrupted him.

"It smells wonderful, Remus. Is it good?" She asked expectantly.

"It's delicious." Remus said with a slightly full mouth.

There was a pause as Debbie waited for him to offer her a taste, but figured she may need to be a bit more straightforward.

"May I have a bite?" She asked, hoping that he would feed it to her.

"I thought you said that chocolate made you gain weight." He said, sticking another forkful into his thankful mouth.

He'd not meant it to be as rude as it sounded, and Peter knew that, though by the expressions the girls shared, he didn't think they knew it. Remus, for all his brilliance, was surprisingly bad at subtleties, and often took the words that people said to him at face value. Of course that was the absolute opposite of what one should do when dealing with girls. Peter figured that was why Remus never had a girlfriend.

Just as the girls at the table were giving Remus looks of disgust, Remus caught sight of two familiar faces looking in the window behind Peter and Helena. Sirius and James both peered through the small circles they'd cleared with their gloved hands, both grinning like fools, obviously laughing at his predicament. Remus rather suddenly stuffed the last few bites into his mouth, speaking through the spongy cake.

"Be right back. Loo." He said, knocking the table slightly as he got up too fast. He ran for the small back door that he'd seen when they'd come in that was hidden from the table the others were at.

Luckily, James and Sirius had caught on to his plan and quickly skirted the building to meet him. They were both wrapped up in their winter coats, their hats hiding their usually untamed hair. Remus was only in a light sweater though, and was lacking gloves, hat, or scarf, and was thus jumping from one foot to the other to keep his body warm.

"You two pricks have to get me out of here!" Remus practically roared as they neared him.

"Now now, Moony, is that the kind of language to use at a swanky place like this?" James teased.

"Shut your mouth, Prongs!" He said as he stuffed his cold fingers into his own armpits for warmth. "I'm serious. I can't handle another minute with them. And the fucking waitress put fucking rose petals in my fucking tea!" He raged.

"Wow, Moony. I kind of like it when you swear like that." Sirius teased.

"I'll do more than swear at you, you horse's ass!" Remus said, jabbing Sirius in the chest with his frozen finger. "I'm never doing you a favor again!"

"Aw, don't be like that, Moony. You're just grouchy 'cause you're cold." He said patronizingly as he unzipped his coat.

"No! Don't touch me!" Remus grumbled as Sirius tried to hug him with his open coat.

The cold really did put him in a bad mood. They all knew it, and made sure to keep a fire going in the dorm room on cold nights, so as not to suffer his wrath. After a half hearted fight, Remus felt much better with Sirius' warm coat wrapped around the both of them, the heat radiating off his hard chest. Remus hoped his face had been red from the cold already, as it was red for a very different reason now. He suddenly didn't care about the teahouse or about his floral tea.

"Feel better?" Sirius asked, his signature lopsided smile on his face.

Remus wished they weren't face to face. Their heights were so similar that it put their kissing apparatus far too close to each other for comfort. Remus huffed to hide his embarrassment, looking over at James for a distraction.

"I suppose. But I'm serious. You two have to find a way to rescue me. I'm dying in there! And I think I'm ruining Wormy's date."

"And jumping ship won't ruin it?" James asked, not seeming surprised by his friends who were huddled up in a single coat.

"Well it might not seem so bad if you make it sound like it's really important." He begged his friends.

"I think this is pretty serious, Prongsy." Said Sirius, bringing a gloved hand up to wipe a bit of chocolate icing from Remus' lip, making him jump unintentionally. "Looks like even chocolate can't make this right."

"Yes! Exactly! You have to do something." Remus said, focusing on James again to keep his heart from leaping clean out of his body, something that he was sure he would not be able to survive.

"Alright, alright." James sighed. "You go back in there for now. Padfoot and I will think of something."

"You'd better." Remus said, all too seriously, before he felt Sirius' arms loosen around him finally releasing him back into the cold.

Remus didn't say anything else to them as he hurried back into the teashop. His heart was racing, and even the muggy little shop felt cold in comparison to the inside of Sirius' coat. He both loved and hated how physically affectionate his friend was. He loved it because it allowed him to indulge in the proximity without coming across as odd or creepy. But he hated it because it gave him so much hope sometimes. He hated how it made his heart rate speed up and his face go hot. He was sure that one of these days it was going to be that proximity that tricked him into letting the kneazle out of the bag. He always fought the urge to grab hold of the other boy's annoyingly soft hair and yank him into a kiss. In his fantasies he would kiss Sirius until the other boy was unable to resist him, but he knew in reality that it would never go that smoothly. Remus' kissing experience was painfully limited. To compensate for the unlikelihood of that particular scenario, he had fantasies where Sirius offered to "teach" him how to kiss properly. Either way, the fantasy was perfect as long as it involved kissing and their hands on each other.

"Kind of a long trip for the bathroom, don't you think?" Helena asked no one in particular as Remus sat back down.

"Oh, right. Sorry about that." Remus said, trying to seem innocent.

"Are you feeling alright, Remus?" Debbie asked in a coddling voice, her hands moving to his arm, "That cake didn't upset your stomach, did it?"

"I'm fine, really." Remus insisted, trying to casually shift to get her hands off of him.

After insisting he was fine a few more times, the others finally fell back into conversation, and even though they were talking about classes, something that Remus usually enjoyed discussing, they were talking about classes he was not in, leaving him unsure of how to participate. Instead, he busied himself by using the tip of his finger to collect the remaining crumbs of his cake, depositing each morsel onto his tongue.

"Oh, look, Helly. They have a place over there where you can have your photo taken under that cute little arbor." Peter suddenly said, drawing Remus' attention again.

Sure enough, in the far corner of teashop was a small arbor wrapped in rose vines whose flowers were charmed to spell out the couple's initials. Remus felt ill at the thought of something so cutesy. Curious as to whether interest in it had to do with couples being in love, he tried to imagine himself and Sirius posing under such an arbor. All he could envision, however, was Sirius jinxing the arbor to make the roses spell out something crude. The photo would show him casting the jinx, and then the two of them falling into each other's arms in laughter. He was sure that he would treasure a photo like that, and without realizing it, he'd let that goofy grin creep back onto his face.

"It's awfully romantic, don't you think?" Debbie asked airily as she noticed his grin.

"Huh?" Remus was pulled out of his daydream far too soon.

"I'd love to have a photo like that taken with someone I love." She said, staring dreamily at Remus instead of the arbor.

"Oh. Well, yes. I suppose that would be a nice souvenir to have." He said carefully, not liking the way that Debbie was staring at him.

"You know, that's what I like so much about you, Remus." She said, propping her cheek up with her hand. "You're so down to earth. You don't get all caught up in the romance." Her eyes suddenly darkened, "Or use it to take advantage of people like that man-whore friend of yours, Sirius."

Remus felt a lump form in his throat. He was suddenly feeling very uncomfortable in this conversation. He had figured that Debbie might still feel a bit wounded from her short lived series of trysts with Sirius, but the look in her eyes made Remus worry that she may be out for revenge.

"You're a much better person than he is, Remus. And you know, even when he and I were dating, I always did fancy you." Her eyelashes fluttered dangerously.

Debbie chuckled when she felt Remus jump in his chair as her hand slide up from his knee. She thought it was adorable how he seemed so innocent and nervous. She'd never seen him with a girlfriend, and after her dealings with Sirius, found that to be quite a plus.

Remus, contrary to what Debbie might have though, felt like screaming in disgust when he felt her fingers on his thigh, but just as she leaned toward him expectantly, an owl crashed in through a set of window, throwing them open and letting in gusts of icy air that left several young women squealing in annoyance. The large barn owl flew immediately to Remus' table and dropped a letter in his lap, successfully rescuing him from the attempted kiss. He had not recognized the owl, but as soon as he opened the letter he recognized the nearly perfect imitation of Dumbledore's handwriting. Sirius never could quite get the hang of the loops in the y's and his signature was always a tiny bit messier than the real thing. But it was good enough to fool most readers.

"Is that from the headmaster?" Debbie asked, surprise obvious in her voice.

Remus glanced through the letter as someone finally got the window shut, though there was still a great deal of noise coming from the tinkling of china as everyone worked to get their tables back in order. The letter said, rather convincingly, that Dumbledore needed to speak with him about his NEWTS, and that it was very urgent. Excitedly handing Debbie the letter, he stood and began pulling his coat on.

"Really sorry to have to leave suddenly like this." He said, trying desperately to keep the grin off his face. "But you know how this sort of thing is."

"Oh, no problem at all. I hope its good news." She said, not trying nearly hard enough to hide her disappointment.

"It's been great." He lied. "We'll have to do it again sometime. Tell the others what happened? Cheers."

And before Debbie could make any real response, Remus fled the shop, missing the look of excitement in her eyes when he suggested they should 'do it again.' He didn't realize it yet, but he was going to regret using such niceties with a girl like Debbie, but for now he was exuberantly thrilled to be free, and when he turned the corner onto High Street, catching sight of his two friends, he threw himself at them, one arm landing over each of their shoulders. Not thinking things could get any better, Sirius produced a bar of his favorite chocolate from Honeydukes, depositing it in his gloved hands.

"A reward for enduring the torture." Sirius said with a grin.

"Oh, Sirius, I love you!" He exclaimed as he tore into the candy, not realizing the biting cold that stung their cheeks was hiding more than his own blush.


TBC