Harry Potter and the Pillar of Storge

Chapter two

A/N: Even though I was gonna wait till i got 5000000 reveiws, i decided to update anyway. ENJOY!!

"WHAT!!!" bellowed Ron.

"Well" began Hermione in a deadly sweet voice "we have a dead girl right in the middle of our compartment. AND YOU KILLED HER!!!", she finished with a bellow.

"Oh, you're talking about Eloise. Yeah, well I had my reasons." said Ron very matter-o-factly.

"LIKE WHAT?? TELL ME, RON, WHAT IN THE NAME OF TEXTBOOKS PROMPTED YOU TO KILL ELOISE?? HMMMM...??" fumed Miss Frizzball herself, Hermione Granger.

"Hermione, come on! She insults my sister AND she's obeese!! What more do you want?" Ron says like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

"Oh, yeah, you're right! She was a bit on the fat side, huh? I mean 200 pounds is just one pound too many." says Hermione sarcastically.

"Exactly! You know--"

Ron got cut off. At that moment Sophie Lockewood (Eloise Midgen's best friend) came walking through the door. She was a 5"4 blue-eyed brunnette weighing at only 98 pounds. Sophie took one look at the dead Eloise and let out an earshattering scream.

"Silencio!" said Ginny, pointing at Screaming Sophie.

She Immediatly became a mute. It looked really weird because her mouth was open but no sound was coming out.

"Good thinking Ginny! I just hope no one heard that!" wheezed Neville.

"Thanks!"

"No problem!"

Neville lost himself in Ginny's uninteresting, regular brown eyes. I think I love her, Neville thought to himself.

Meanwhile, Luna was still staring at Harry's tattoo.

Sophie just stood there looking dumb. Her mouth was open but no sound was coming out. You could still make out what she was saying, though, and it wasn't pretty.

"You know what guys? That Sophie girl is REALLY getting on my last nerve. AVADA KE--" Harry began.

"No!!" shouted Ron, cutting him off.

"What did you say? " replied Harry menancingly.

"Well, you know, she is not fat."

"So?"

"Well, why waste a perfectly good spell on a skinny person?"

"Good point Ron. CRUCIO!!" bellows Harry, pointing his wand directly at Sophie.

Sophie crumbles on to the floor and lets out a silent wail of agony. She looks kinda funny because her eye starts twitching. This goes on for about five minutes while Hermione and Ginny laugh their heads off. Neville starts to take a very keen interest in the wall again and Luna Lovegood is still staring at Harry Potter's storm shaped tattoo.

All of a sudden, Hermione stops laughing. Actually, it was so unexpected that everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at her, even that wacko, Luna Lovegood.

" What?" yelled everyone.

" Well, I don't think this is right."

"Why? You've got to agree, this is pretty funny! Heck, I could probably sell this material to Dave Chappelle!" said Harry

"You want to know why? Gee, let me think Harry" Hermione was starting to get sarcastic, "You just performed an Unforgiviable curse you moronic idiot! And on someone who wasn't worth it"

" But-"

"BUT NOTHING!!"

Hermione was a raging crackpot by now.

"There's only one thing we can do to save our hides." whispered Ginny.

"What?" inquired Longbottom. He had really taken a liking to the youngest Weasley. Unfortunately Ron had noticed this and flexed his muscles

threatningly at him. This was somewhat odd considering that Ron doesn't have any muscles to begin with.

"Isn't it obvious," began that sorry excuse for a walking textbook, "we'll have to kill her or else she'll squeal!"

At hearing that Sophie went nutters. She pulled out a wad of cash and started jumping up and down with it to signify that she'd pay them not to kill her. Only Ron took notice of this but as he reached for the money--

"Fine, fine. I've done this sort of thing before, let me do it." drawled Harry.

"YOU HAVE??" everyone else hollored.

"Yeah, remember JonBenet Ramsey?"

And with that Harry stepped up to poor Sophie and pressed his thumb three degrees to the left of her Adam's apple. Within seconds she was dead.

A/N: I should probably say right now that this was a fic that I had already written but abondoned. Blaise666 was my beta and she added a few tidbits to the story as well. Anyway, I just felt like going back and making it a bit better and republishing it.

Oh ya, please review!!