*Rosie is riding through the woods on a little white mule, singing sweetly*

Rosie [sung]: Saint Bracegirdle, Saint Bracegirdle

It's Rose Cotton, remember me?

Saint Bracegirdle, Saint Bracegirdle

I'm over here beneath this tree

You know how faithful and devout I've been

You must admit I've always been a lamb

But Bracegirdle, Saint Bracegirdle

I won't obey you any more

You've gone a bit too far

I won't be bid and bargained for like 'shrooms at a bazaar

Saint Bracegirdle, I've run away, eluded them and fled

And from now on I intend to pray to someone else instead

Oh, Bracegirdle, Saint Bracegirdle

Where were you when my youth was sold?

Dear Bracegirdle, sweet Bracegirdle

Shan't I be young before I'm old?

Where are the simple joys of hobbithood?

Where are all those adoring, daring lads?

Where's the boy pining so for me

He follows a ring-bear' for me?

Oh, where are a Hobbit's simple joys?

Shan't I have the normal life a Halfling should?

Shall I never be rescued in the wood?

Shall two boys never tilt for me

And let carrots be spilt for me?

Oh, where are the simple joys of hobbithood?

Shall I not be on a riverboat

Worshipped and drooled over?

Not be carried off or, better still

Cause a little war?

Where are the simple joys of hobbithood?

Are these sweet, gentle pleasures gone for good?

Shall a feud not begin for me?

Shall kith not kill their kin for me?

Oh, where are the trivial joys

Harmless convivial joys

Where are the simple joys of hobbithood?