Disclaimer: JK owns everything. Enough said.
A/N: Second Chapter is here!!! Yeeha!!! Anyways, from the looks of it, this is another person's point of view, read what he has to say… Wait for the next chapter…this definitely doesn't end here!!! Unless you don't review of course…so keep those reviews coming!!!
The second chapter isn't a continuation yet; it's a person's point of view on what he sees about the same scene, while Hermione is sitting. The whole story is written in POV style but of course, they think differently of the same topics, so it's not just the same idea. The people have different ideas, that's why things not understood by Hermione might be understood here or on the next chapter. Actually, the next chapter wraps all things you don't understand, like the gift and stuff, not yet here. Please R/R so that I can start on the next chapter already, I always procrastinate.
Chapter 2: The Right TimeBy prowess
There she was, sitting on one of the park benches, and I, looking far away, realize she's not reading. It was a bit odd really, since the last time I saw her, she could never choose the perfect book to read. Of course I couldn't tell her what to read, I can't even get near her. But still, it's nice to look even from afar. Her feet were crossed gently and gracefully, and her right elbow was resting on her knee. Her left arm was delicately across it, behind her other arm. She was very sweet, very elegant; dainty, actually, in her creamy beige off shoulder blouse and her fitted uneven skirt, with large ruffles at the end. I look at the alternating beige, cream and pink lines on her skirt, in light waves, just like the little ribbon on her hat. I've never seen her show so much skin and beauty, not until now. Very deep in thought, I might say, her eyes seemingly looking far away. I wonder how her life has been these past years we weren't together. And she's eating chocolate too, something new, since she wasn't that fond of them. I can see that this has been her spot, a little quiet place where you can read books, look at the wonderful scenery around you. Perhaps she would want to be alone right now, thinking about things, and I would wait until she stands up and goes home. And then I'll give her this.
Something I had thought of months ago, one day as I was able to visit the muggle world. I was so stupid then, waiting for the perfect moment to show up and do something. I planned on surprising you the next day but Ron owled me and said they needed me there. Splithead, one of Voldemort's newest followers attacked and I just had to battle him. So much for the surprise. Luckily, I was able to arrange it with the person in charge before I left and now I have bought it for you. It was a good thing too that they hadn't thrown this away, they believed me for some reason and kept it all these months. I'm thankful for that.
Hermione! I could've run to you, help you with your books, scold the boy who bumped you, startled you and made you kneel down to gather what fell. I could've but I didn't. I didn't because I was foolish. There's something inside of me that says I shouldn't, not yet, and no matter how I ignore it, I can't prevent it. Then I come too late. I always let you slip whenever we have the chance and I watch time pass and you turning your back on me. Knowing you, you are really angry about the books being kicked by the boy. And I didn't do anything…I don't know this problem that I have. What is this, excessive patience? Waiting too much that you can't do anything until too late? I want to walk to you but it's as if my feet are mentally glued to the floor. I feel helpless, and so weak.
Now you are standing, looking at the bar you are eating a little bit oddly, and maybe this was the right moment to come to you, surprise you with my gift and catch up on lost time. Sometimes, I look back at what happened to us, the little memories. From the very first day I saw the big castle, to the time when I had to look back at it with you for the last time. Remembering the battles we fought, because of each other, where I first saw you, and when I first felt your strength and determination. When I realize that you aren't just full of books and knowledge but something more, something you told me I had, when we battled with Voldemort for the first time- bravery, will, you had them too, and so did Ron, for if you didn't, I wouldn't have someone to walk with when facing Voldemort. I probably wouldn't be here right now. You weren't just some Mudblood that Draco used to tell you. You were a friend, you still are to me, and I just wish I still am to you, no matter how far apart we have been.
I used to regret, as every day passes by and I never saw your face, never heard your voice that is like a siren's song echoing in my mind, making me give in, mesmerized by the sound, never smiled back when you do. After the last day, I never got to meet you, or at least see you, and it hurts me because you were so special, something I treasure deeply in my heart. I always planned on seeing you here, but every time, I back out, thinking that it's not yet time, or sometimes, Voldemort's people surface and I have to go and defeat them. Sometimes I think of the positive effect of all this, that they don't run after you, they don't try to kill you or hurt you, making your life normal and peaceful. But then, I think of how I miss you, your eyes, your laugh, your constant scolding when we are in trouble, your knowledge, your encouragement, your concern… Sometimes too, I wonder if you still think of me, if you miss me the way I do to you, if you also long to see me and look in my eyes. I'm always shy to talk in front of you then, because you have forgotten me, your encouraging smile slowly fading to a small one. And then I wonder, where our friendship has gone…
When you come to Hogwarts, I always try to find you, even just to see your face for a fraction of a second. When you hold your little lectures, I try to get as close to you, even if there are crowds of people. And you would always look for that someone you wanted to see so much. How could it be me, when every time we meet we never talk about anything? I'd always envy that person you always look for, the person you wanted to dance with during Yule Ball when I asked you, the person you always owl, the person who always sees you, Ron, perhaps, or the other people that see you everyday and not appreciate it.
When I looked back at the bench, nobody was there.
Hermione? I don't think you've left have you? Or was this just another bench? This wasn't the seat you were resting on, is it? How could she have left early? Of course, she has no one to wait for. This has gone too far. I've waited long enough, always waiting for that right moment, but I never know when it is. And now, I ruined another chance of talking to her. She's gone again, and I can't go to their house, it just doesn't feel right. Ron, he said he's in a soda shop with June. Stay here? Why is staying here an option when she already left? Or did she leave?
The door of a store near her bench opened, and out came someone familiar. The same beige blouse and creamy skirt, the loose, lightly bushy, yet pretty hair, the same glance. She hasn't left yet, and I'm so overwhelmed that I didn't mess this one up. I still have the chance.
I feel like a baby, one small step at a time, toward her. But then I run back again where I hide. It's that feeling again, I feel like I'm going to be guilty if I go now. But I also feel guilty when it's all over and I wasn't able to do anything. It's just so unfair. For days, weeks actually, before trying to plan to come here, I thought of what ways I could meet with Hermione. I could knock at her door, or at the clinic where I heard she works, I could surprise her when she goes out, I could come running to her, I could purposely bump her…and I haven't thought of the best one yet.
I watch you sit back again and continue to eat your little sweet, and see you are rather surprised. Something fell, perhaps, and from the looks of it, you are quite disappointed. Oh, It's a piece of your chocolate. I wanted to help you again, but it's the same feeling that keeps me holding back. It just seems that every time I feel it, something wrong happens, and I can't bring myself to defy it.
I'm now thinking of a lot of things in our past, thinking of a nice topic to start a conversation, something that could take very long, laughing and talking till we catch our breaths because of the longevity. A topic wherein we'd remember lots and lots of memories, bloopers, everything that would link to another and another and we'd have no plans of stopping. Hogwarts? What about it? There's a lot in there. But that's what I wanted, right? I should think of a nice incident too, but what? Though my mind is flashing different situations that clash in my head, one stays clear. The last Christmas we had. Ron being persuaded to go to Charlie, who was sick, he really felt bad. And we did too. Ginny looked very happy to go. Was it a fight between him and Crabbe, or Goyle? The party was cool, we all had fun, but when Ron left, it was just dead silence. We cleaned the place up, and all the while I was thinking of a nice story to start a conversation, I was thinking so hard that before I knew it, cleaning up was over and Hermione, unknown to me, went outside. Of course, I followed. The snow was falling, She was running far away, and I saw her sit on a large rock. Course, I didn't go after her. What was I going to say, would I sit beside her and talk or just stand behind her and start a conversation? It was just, I can't remember…maybe this isn't a good time to really think about that.
I'm thinking too hard. Maybe what this needs is a little spontaneity, just think clear, free my mind of all worries and doubts.
I started to move forward. With every step, my heart moves a little faster, pounding through my chest. Then I looked at her, and this weird feeling enters my veins again. I start to panic a little bit. I have to get everything of my chest- my feelings, words I want to say, even just little by little. But I have to start now.
I clutch at my little present, along with a letter from someone.
Harry,
She will be in the park today. It's her day off.
There really was no signature, but from the nice smooth handwriting, I know whom it came from. I really doubted this at first, but looking at what I see today, it was the truth. I just wanted to stay here, look at your pretty features, your hair, not as bushy as usual, your smooth, flowing skin. There was just one thing I wanted, the thing that I missed most about you. And I can't see it from here, so sooner or later, I'd have this nice, strong feeling of coming up there and looking at your most beautiful and heartfelt attribute-your eyes, the most sincere I have ever seen. Narrowed because of strength and determination, not to mention reading too hard, wide when overjoyed or surprised, just the right size when serious or deep in thought, and I can't see that from here. It would just be a matter of time.
Probably, when I calm down and relax a bit, everything could be all right. I'd march there slowly, and hand you whatever I have to. While waiting though, I'd just think about you, me, our moments together, like I have been for the past few years, when I'm out battling Voldemort or listening to your accurate and very informative lectures. When asking for questions, when nearly in the end, I'd just like to raise my hand, and ask, What about us? Our friendship? Do you still care for me? And I'd imagine your face. Would you ignore me, or smile? I don't know because I never tried, one of the many things that I regret. But now, things would be different. I'd just have to find out where to start.
Hermione, what have gone through together? From our first year, the potion riddle, how I could've never guessed it, how happy and amazed I was when you did, second year, how you figured out the basilisk so quickly, and also how innocent you were, hearing Mudblood spat at you for the first time, and I wanted to punch Malfoy even if I didn't know what it meant at first. Third year, Fourth year, it could go on…Seventh year…our last Christmas…graduation…our last hug…our last goodbye…Of course I didn't join you in the train, I was asked to stay by Dumbledore, but I promised I'd keep I touch. I never knew it could be this hard.
Maybe that's why I'm nervous. Because I haven't seen you in one, two years, and I'm scared of the impression you'd see of me. You'd probably even think I'm this boastful fool, who never got to talk to his best friend whenever he had the chance. When I look in your eyes, you'd just go away. It's scary what I think sometimes, and I hope that the next time we meet, it will be the day I would make something worthwhile, making all the regrets I've felt vanish.
Hermione, if you stayed a little longer in Hogwarts, I could've been with you, and not miss you this much. We could've spent moments talking together, laughing and stuff, and then Ron would come to visit and then we would be complete once again. I wanted to take Ron's place, or just be like Ron, even for a while, meeting you almost everyday, receiving letters from you, hear your problems and comfort you. But I never had the time. Dumbledore wanted me to stay as long as possible, since once Voldemort's cronies know I'm gone, they attack immediately, by large numbers sometimes. Sometimes, I think of my powers as a curse, I can't reach my happiness because of them. But, if I didn't have those powers, where would I be then? Stuck with the Dursleys. If you only knew how much I wanted to touch you each day I couldn't, how I wanted to see you each time I didn't, how I greatly anticipate another lecture, no matter how boring it is, just to have you here, how I wanted to see you first in each battle that I won. How I wanted to save you, the person I wanted to live happy, of all the people here, and I wasn't able to because you weren't here anyway, and no one would touch you there. I wanted to rerun time, and I know I could, by charm or potion or whatever, but how I wanted to, just to make up for every mistake I have made. Starting from the last Christmas we had, then that moment outside, then when you came back for research or lecturing. I wanted to change everything. Then, that weird thing happens to me, and because of the feeling, I end up doing nothing. If you only knew how much I long to see your sweet eyes, that do not flutter, unlike Cho's or Ginny's, but show concern and care, I wasn't able to repay that. And I've made a fool of myself in doing so. And now, I blame myself for being this over patient fool who always backs out and wait and wait and just waste time. I just hope you still accept me, the way I am; I do pray you will still treat me as your friend.
Leaves of honey gold and persimmon orange fall near my hiding place. Autumn air passed swiftly through my hair, and I listen to the gentle crackle of the crisp leaves as they slowly pluck and descend from the branches. And I imagined that every leaf was a single memory, an instance where we were together, falling down, being forgotten.
I sighed, and tried to imagine again, what my life could be if you were there in Hogwarts or I was here. Tried not to regret, just tried to accept how things turned out. But it's just so hard if you think of possibilities. How I could've changed if I received a letter from her not about the schedule of her lectures, something personal. How she would've cheered me up when I missed my parents. How I could've jumped for joy, knowing she's coming to visit me, and rush to her and hug her as tight as I could. How she would've been supportive and stay by my side. How she would've made my day, just to see her smile that reassuring smile again. How I wouldn't be like this, if only she was here, or if only I was there. It's just depressing to know that it never happened. I just wanted it so badly; perhaps that's why I'm like this.
Maybe, this thinking should be stopped. I shouldn't be much affected by the past, these memories should stop haunting me, and I have to move on. I should remember these events as nice reminiscences since they are truly nice ones, wherein I was happy. And what I have to do now is to continue that happiness, and start one for her, towards me too. I should make a move, and not cower anymore.
Suddenly there was just this strength building up inside me, making me feel light and free. I looked at what I have in hand. My neatly wrapped gift, the letter, which was now crumpled, and then I felt something was lacking. But what is it?
I looked back at her, then at my gift. Wasn't it too awkward if I gave the gift first? Shouldn't there be some sort of introduction? Wouldn't she be too suspicious of why I'm giving the gift?
I thought and thought of what a nice thing to give her would, something the elders used to. Well, I remember Uncle Vernon giving Aunt Petunia flowers one day when she was frustrated; perhaps that's a nice start. I never thought the Dursley's would do me good in my life, not in a time like this, well, except for letting me live up to this day. Luckily, I don't have to live there anymore. Where would I find good flowers? It's just so cheap to just pick up from the park; I have to find the nearest flower shop possible.
I dashed towards the dim passageway near the bridge, where I hid for some minutes now, farther from her. I don't know where the flower shop is, but it seemed that my feet were carrying me to the right direction. I ran past people, dogs, houses almost everything, when I swerved in a corner and there, in stone cobbled floor was a pretty flower stall, shining in all it's glory. Not a very big store, but from the looks of it, the business is very prosperous. It's late afternoon and the roses are left to a few bouquets. I went to this lady who was a little pump, wearing a white apron and a yellow bandanna, and asked her if she was the owner of the stall.
"Well, you might put it that way, yes. My sister and me run this stall." I looked at the big buckets filled with water, leaves visible floating since the many flowers that used to stay there were already bought.
"Could I have a dozen roses please? How much would that cost?"
"I'm very sorry but these roses were reserved and already paid for. There aren't any left. You came late, young man. All the flowers are already reserved, perhaps for dinners later. Love is in the air, even if it isn't February. Better check tomorrow morning. I'll reserve some for you. Do you need a vase? We've got some elegant ones here, perfect to place your roses in, while having your lovely dinner." She pointed at the back of their stall, where vases were displayed in the shelves.
"No, I need them today, right now. Have you got any other flowers?"
She showed me lots of variations, spider-like ones, which Hermione wouldn't want, I think, flowers shipped from other countries, which were a little heavy for my pocket, and local ones that were left behind, the unwanted ones because they had brown spots on their petals, or broken stems or curled up and nearly wilted leaves. And then, on one small bucket, lay the purest, cleanest most beautiful daffodil in the whole shop. And when I looked at it, it's the perfect flower to give to her, since I remembered her and the many moments we shared. It was very unfortunate it was the only one left, but it seemed that it was the best one of all, at least for me. I wonder if I would be beautiful for her.
I bought it, not that expensive not that cheap, just right for me and hopefully, she would like it, just a little reminder of the old days. I walked back towards where I came from, but my feet were taking me somewhere else, and somehow I felt that it was the best choice. I went the other way, and to my surprise, the flower shop wasn't that far from the bench where Hermione was sitting. I was a bit frustrated that I came the other way, running past everything I ran into, swerving to corners, bumping people, and then see that there was a shorter and safer way. But then, when I looked at her, I knew why.
She was sitting in front of me, though I can see that she was thinking of something deep, since she wasn't able to see me. It was kind of weird too; she was chewing on foil already, probably remembering something or someone special. I wish that she thought of me, even just once from the time we parted ways.
I looked at her eyes for the first time, and I felt light and warm inside, something inside told me to step forward. I did, and I didn't feel that weird feeling anymore, my steps weren't heavy and I wasn't feeling guilty. I slowly walked to her, knowing this is it- my chance. I came to her just as she was standing up. She still didn't notice me, and I wasn't watching my step.
I bumped her.
She was very shocked, and I was very stupid. She definitely thought I was someone else. She looked up to me and it was just so nice that her eyes met mine. I can't think of anything after that, and all I muttered was a simple hey.
She apologized, for being speechless perhaps. If she only knew how speechless I was too.
I don't know what to do next, but I felt my hands outstretch and me getting closer to her, pulling her into a nice hug. She placed my hands around my waist, and I was a bit nervous, but her return hug gave me a relief that she still cares for me and hasn't forgotten me. We stood like that for a couple of seconds, but I remembered the flower I held, swaying with the wind. We broke up, and I gave her the daffodil I hurriedly bought.
"Thanks for giving me a…daffodil," she responded. And she didn't seem too happy about it. It upset me a bit, but just for quite a while, I remembered that the Dursleys were quite weird, and if giving flowers would please them, it probably wouldn't please other normal people. Then I remembered my real gift. Hopefully that would make her happy.
"Oh that's not all, here." I gave her my original present. But she hastily said that she liked the flower after all, and that made me feel better. The Dursleys were a bit more human after all. My hands were trembling a bit and I quickly gave her the gift so I could hide my hands.
"I've had enough for a day," she ended, flashing this bright smile, and I knew what she was talking about. That little bar of chocolate was a bit too many for her, and I understood that. It was funny, really, and I told her not to worry because it isn't.
I wanted to see the expression on her face when she opens the gift, just to see how it means to her. I felt it was a bit blunt for me to ask her to open it; she should have took her time. Her constant apologies made me smile, and of course, I replied saying it's okay, no matter and the like.
While she was looking at the wrappings, I was nervous, my fingers can't keep still, clenching unclenching, moving my thumb in between the other fingers, luckily I wasn't fumbling with my feet, like a bashful idiot. I was thinking too much if she would like it or not, when she said out loud how wonderful it is, where I got it, and stuff. I looked up hastily, like a husband being called by the doctor about his wife, and I answered her questions.
"Oh, Harry, I love it. But you shouldn't have, I'm not worth the trouble." Those words hit me. Not…worth…the trouble? How can you not be? After not seeing you for 2 years, after missing you for two years, after dreaming and hoping of this day, you are going to say you are not worth the trouble? How could I've run up through people, screaming at me, buy a little flower, buy this present if you aren't? You are worth everything there is…
And I just felt she should think otherwise…
"Hermione, don't think that way. I've never seen you in how many years, and I just wanted to show you that I still care. I never got to talk to you in Hogwarts. That's why I decided to come here, where I'm not the famous Harry Potter. I'm glad you like it." Those words were straight from the heart. I came here to talk to you, and not be interfered by anyone. I want to make use of this time to make up for lost ones. I want to be with you again, and hear your voice, and see your face, and gaze at you eyes…. And I managed to whisper, because of so much love and emotion: I am so lucky to have you.
I was a bit shocked at first at what she might think about it, but she was looking at my gift, and she didn't seem to hear it. I have double feelings about her not hearing it. I kind of regret she didn't hear it, but at the same time I'm glad she didn't. I was reassured that she didn't hear it when she replied, " I love it. Thank you so much." And I felt her appreciation.
She finally looked at my eyes and noticed I was looking at hers. Time seemed to stop amongst us, and I just wanted to gaze at her eyes for a couple more minutes. Hopefully she didn't see my eyes were getting a bit teary, behind my glasses, because of the thought that it's finally here. I finally did it. And I never thought I would. Then she hugged me quickly, forcing me to close my eyes as a small tear fell. Good thing she did hug me and I quickly wiped it away so that no one would see it, especially Hermione.
"It's nice to have you back,"
I helped her wear the very much-appreciated present. And she traced the outline and the nice design all the way home. It wasn't that fancy really, I tried to make it as simple as possible.
While walking to their house, I asked Hermione to go to a soda shop first where Ron and June are, spending some time together as usual, just to greet them and talk to them about current events here in the muggle world. Issues about us, family, friends. And then I remembered the feeling I always felt when I wanted to go to Hermione or see her, that different, guilty feeling, and I thought about thinking of myself as an over patient fool I called myself earlier. I realized that I had that feeling because it wasn't the right time, not yet. You shouldn't regret about those kinds of things, because there is always hope, unless she told me there isn't any. And even if she said there isn't, sometimes there is. It's the heart that would tell you the right time, and not the mind, I guess I learned about that because of the light feeling I felt, that overpowering calmness…Maybe, those two years that passed just made me realize how I missed her, how important she is to me. And that if I didn't miss her, I wouldn't have cared for her at all. Not as much as I care for her now. I thought of myself drinking that potion or saying that spell that could turn back time and visualized the future that we would have. It was funny, what came up and I seemed to forget the things I used to regret, because I can look at her eyes again. I also thought of the crazy things I did today, running through crowds and buying a flower and I was closer to her than I thought, feeling that those minutes, or hours I was standing there and waiting were the longest in my life. It all was sort of coming together, the waiting, the walking that far and coming back faster were timed perfectly, and I really think that I came on the right time. It also dawned to me that, good things come to those who wait, and I firmly believe I have waited long enough for this moment to happen, and now that it's finally here, it would be with me forever.
A/N: Whew! That was a longer chapter! A couple MSWord pages longer than the first! But like Harry, I finally did it! I just hope you review…tell me what you think. Sorry for grammatical errors, I'm still studying grammar. Sorry, for mistakes, incorrect info about Harry, Hermione, or anyone. I'm just an adolescent who still wasn't able to read Books 3 and 4 of the HP series. Yeah, I know how much I'm missing; you don't have to remind me. Please be kind and review and wait for the next chapter. Next chapter: another person's POV, revelation of the gift! That's all.
