A/N: I'm doing casting here really quickly. Agent Michael is (in my mind) played by Eliza Dushku. Agent Kellan is played by Maggie Lawson. Agent Miller (He'll show up later) is played by David Krumholtz.
*~*~*
"Alright. Ripley, when I give an order I expect to be obeyed."
"Even if it's against the law?"
"You're goddamn right!"
~Alien~
*~*~*
An old man turned ninety-eight.
He won the lottery and died the next day.
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay.
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late.
And isn't it ironic... don't you think?
~Ironic, Alanis Morisette~
*~*~*
The sun was just rising over Rock Creek Park, casting long shadows across the still-cold ground. The birds sang their songs, oblivious to the elderly couple walking around the park, attempting to photograph the early morning scenery.
The woman walked towards the river, stumbling over something in the sand. She righted herself, then looked over her shoulder to see what had tripped her.
Her shill scream upon seeing a human skull, still wearing a Marine service cap, silenced even the birds.
*~*~*
"Our dead petty officer's a skeleton?" One somewhat confused Probationary Agent Elizabeth Michael asked in confusion, looking at the skull that was slowly being excavated. Tony rolled his eyes.
"No, Agent Michael. That's a broom. Can't you see?" he replied sarcastically, photographing the crime scene. He laughed quietly to himself, then looked at Elizabeth, whose face was blank with confusion.
"But how can a broom be in the Marines?"
"…It can't, Agent Michael. I was being sarcastic."
"Oh… but what...?"
"Elizabeth, do yourself a favor and quit while you're ahead."
"How'll that help me?"
"It won't. I'm trying to get you to shut up."
"Oh."
The agents continued to walk around the crime scene, trying to find one shred of evidence, which so far there was none of. Several minutes later, a very exasperated Ducky and an apologetic Palmer arrived, heading towards the skeleton by the river. The agents all turned to look at the recent arrivals.
"I must apologize, Jethro." Ducky said, looking slightly annoyed. "Mr. Palmer took a wrong turn and drove about 20 miles before he realized that he was driving towards downtown."
Gibbs just nodded.
"I found something. And I really don't know what it is, nor do I want to know." Elizabeth shouted, edging away slowly from something on the ground. Gibbs looked at her, frustrated.
"Well?"
"A tarot card. But there's a really weird drawing on it. Like… I honestly don't know."
Tony recognized what she meant and sighed.
"It's the Tarot killer. Time to call the FBI."
*~*~*
"Bones!" Booth walked quickly into the Jeffersonian, trying to look like there was a better reason for him to be there than a skeleton. The person in question looked up from the remains she was studying, raising an eyebrow.
"What is it?"
"NCIS needs our help. There's a dead body in Rock Creek Park and it's a complete skeleton. They specifically asked for you, apparently. I didn't really hear much else because Chris started rambling on about something about statistical probability of a skeleton being found in a park and tarot cards and something about milking camels."
"Chris?" Brennan asked, understanding everything else.
"Christine – er, Agent Kellan. Everyone who knows her calls her Chris. Can we just go? I wanna see the tarot card and the body!" Booth was, at this point, nearly jumping up and down in excitement. Brennan smiled, then walked down the stairs of the forensics platform.
"Why are you so excited about this one skeleton? You've seen dozens."
"Because it has all the calling cards for one of Kellan's serial killer cases and I really want to show Chris up. Wow, that was hard to say."
"I really need to meet this woman."
"She doesn't use any logic at all. I don't think you two would get along."
"Your point?"
The two of them walked out of the Jeffersonian, still arguing.
*~*~*
The man walked away from the bed, where the body of a young woman lay cold and stiff. Quickly, he covered the edges of the room with gasoline, then stepped out the door. He lit a match, the smell of sulfur filling the air, and threw it in the room. In seconds, the building was going up in flames. He smiled, then walked out of the house, throwing down another Tarot card. The King of Wands.
No wonder people were such skeptics when it came to card reading.
*~*~*
A/N: First off, I have to say three things. One – Elizabeth and Chris have really weird world views, and anything they say makes sense only to them. Two – I'm horrible when it comes to card reading, but since it ties in to the story, I'm going to try my best. Three – The Tarot Killer is really hard to write, that's all I'm going to say. Anyway… crossovers seem easier to write before you write them. And my genius dad limited my computer time to 2 hours a day during weekdays because he found the parental controls. Damn the Apple store for making computer manuals that even Gibbs could understand. And lastly, I have to take the PSAT Wednesday, which means studying. Joy.
