Rewrite: updated 1/15/12
Chapter 2
I'm Home!
I finally asked why the worst friends in the history of the world were elected to pick me up together, and was told that L had needed both Watari and Matt to wrap up a case. Also, as Mello put it, "We didn't need Matt goin' into conniptions." I nodded, and spent the rest of the trip to the hotel keeping my head in front of Near's to block him from Mello's line of sight. It was, to say the least, not fun.
It sort of felt like I was one of those guys in the orange jumpsuits with the fashionable matching anklets and bracelets- oh wait, those are called criminals. I believe that we can all appreciate the irony in this, yes? Good, we're on the same page. I've never seen Mello and Near work together on a single thing, but they flanked me like they were brain-twins or something in the elevator ride up to the room. Mello, of course was angry, because he seems to be able to express himself in precious few ways. I'll give him some credit for the fact that he had bothered to go through the effort of picking me up. Undoubtedly it was because Matt asked him to, but it didn't hurt that my name was missing from his Hate List. I didn't understand what Near was getting out of it, though. Whammy's approval? L's? Maybe a shiny new toy. There wasn't much that motivated him.
I should mention, in the event that you, dear reader have not known him long enough to understand, Mello has a rather short reserve of patience that had been mostly used by the time we reached the room. Their room, because I was a big girl and could take care of myself, and anyway, I had already set up a new job nearby with reservations in a different hotel. Matt wouldn't like it, but he didn't have to. I was a goddamn independent woman.
Back to Mello's patience (or lack thereof), once he found that his key wasn't working (and seriously, who actually uses real keys in hotels anymore?) he looked damn close to simply beating down the door with Near. "No appreciation for the finer arts, you," I teased, and set about picking the lock. It's a skill that comes in handy more than you'd think, especially if you tend to lock yourself out a lot. I'm not going to say that everyone should learn it, because frankly, I don't want people getting into my stuff. Although the only people who seem motivated to actually do that already know how, but I digress.
I was first hit by the overwhelming smell of cigarettes, and nearly died. "What the hell?" I muttered. Mello pushed past me, saying something vaguely accusatory about Matt smoking a pack a minute for a week straight.
Stupid Overprotective Brother Syndrome.
I tried to peer around the corner, to see if Matt was had gotten through a carton yet, since he should have been back if they'd left only that morning. Matt's sort of the master of anything electronic. "Hello?" I called, "Anyone home?" Nope. Mello was right behind me, hand firm on my shoulder in a way that said Get your ass in there. I shrugged him off and slumped on the couch by the door with about as much grace as I could manage. I didn't bother to kick off my shoes by my bag, but just sat and rubbed my leg, trying to knead some of the pain out of it.
After about a minute of waiting, of watching Near start to pick up his puzzle pieces and Mello unwrap the last bit of a chocolate bar, I sighed. Loudly. "Shut up," said Mello, more out of habit than anything. It was just- hey just looked so fucking normal that I wanted to fall on my side and curl up in a ball because it looked like six months before, six months before I had gone off to face the heat and the bombs but it wasn't, clearly. And they didn't seem to have changed. And it hurt, somewhere inside, for some reason that I didn't quite grasp. So I sighed again. Mello looked up. "Don't think I won't smack you," he said, and crumpled the wrapper in his hand, tossing it at Near. Near shifted and the ball went flying past him, which Mello didn't bother to notice as he strolled into the kitchenette sort of thing. Fine with me. I pulled out a ballpoint pen to give myself something to do. I started to draw on my arm, ignoring the tremor.
Near had, evidently, been waiting for Mello to leave. He sat beside me in what I called a 'half-L' position, holding a bowl of strawberries. I had no idea where he'd been hiding them, maybe assuming that Matt wouldn't be back yet? No, not assuming, never assuming. He would have made an educated prediction. Nothing was guesswork. I pretended for a second that it was simply Near being nice before he held the bowl out of my reach and said, "You aren't going to be very cooperative with me, will you." It was not a question, but it was an attempt at one. He must have been practicing his small talk. " I think that interrogation has the least chance. Therefore, bribery."
Alright, he didn't actually say Therefore, bribery, but that was what he meant. And no matter what weakness I had for strawberries (have you honestly ever gone a full six months without one?) I decided that I wasn't going to be Near's new toy. He was not going to play councilor, nor was anybody else- not him, not Mello (which would end tragically) not Matt, Not Whammy, and definitely not L. I was saved from cussing him out in French when I heard a crash from the other room, followed closely by a sonofabitch! I sprang as fast as I could into action, wincing, while Near watched. A wise choice, considering his untested status on battering-ram capability.
Mello was having a hissy-fit over, predictably, chocolate. He was throwing a toaster when I entered. I blinked. This sort of thing never happened (not the hissy-fit or toaster-throwing, the out-of-chocolate part). Whammy (and when around, I) never let their be a chocolate shortage around Mello, because it always ended with thrown toasters or people or death threats or any manner of unpleasant things and bribery to keep people quiet. Matt, I assumed, must have had his own way of dealing with it
I was distracted from my mission of keeping Mello from going ape-shit for a moment. I said, "Jesus, you do know that people can hear you, right?" and he just put his hands on his hips, and flipped his hair over his shoulder. I suddenly realized that the familiar leather was tighter than it had been six months ago, and nearly laughed, "Mels, when'd you get to be such a girl?"
He glowered at me from under his fringe, something almost inherently feminine and grumbled, "When'd you get to be such a cripple?" before turning back to tear the room apart. He hadn't especially meant for me to hear it, because he'd get no end of bitching from Matt if he had, so I pretended that he hadn't even spoken.
I hobbled over and punched him in the arm, trying to change his focus. "How the hell did you run outta chocolate, anyhow? You usually have enough to make Godiva do a double-take." I said this because, again, it should have been impossible for him to be out. He was with Matt, almost exclusively, and when he wasn't he was working with the mafia and they all knew what happened when Mello wasn't happy, or at least had a peon that knew to pay him in chocolate, so I ticked things off in my head. Mello hadn't been with the mafia for about a week now. Matt should have been with him, and even if he hadn't been with Matt, it looked like Whammy had been near by... but then that wouldn't have worked, I realized. Matt had (by the smell of the room) been chain smoking, and when he does that, he's pretty distracted about normal day-to-day things. Whammy was usually looking after the world's three greatest detectives (plus Near and Mello and Matt, which I suppose made six), so how was he supposed to slip out and run errands? I shook my head and swallowed down my guilt.
"I left it right on the fucking counter, it was fucking there!"
I laughed shortly, "L must've lifted it, then." Mello had probably come to that conclusion already, seeing as he was the detective, but hearing me say it made him look like he was going to punch somebody, and Near with a nose bleed isn't a pretty sight. I rolled my eyes to cover up my relief- a reason to leave. I hobbled to the door and picked up my cane again, checking my pockets for change that was actually worth something in this country.
I could have given Mello the box I had in my bag, but it was probably a little melted, and besides, I didn't know how long I'd be able to stand Near pumping me for information. And although Mello didn't play nice with Near, they had been acting a bit odd, so for all I knew he might have joined in; and the sillage of cigarettes was driving me crazy- not the smell of cigarettes, because they had gone, but the smell left behind to dissipate in the room. You just need to clear your head, get some air, I told myself. This is totally not running away from anything. I quickly scribbled a note to Matt and left it on the couch. Gimp, throbbing leg be damned, I was out of there. Good thing I hadn't taken off my shoes.
"Where the fuck do you think you're going?" Mello yelled.
"To get your chocolate fix. There's a café downstairs. I'll leave my wallet, alright? I'll be back!" I called to him, and snatched a strawberry from Near. He didn't protest, possibly because he thought hide-and-seek was a better game than 20 questions. I heard Mello cursing, trying to kick various kitchen appliances out of his way before I closed the door behind me. The quiet was absolutely wonderful.
For about five seconds.
The elevator around the corner dinged, doors slid open, and a new voice sounded, "-so calm yourself."
I was already looking for for an out when I spotted an open door. Perfect- the maid had her back turned, and with loud music pouring out of her headphones, she didn't notice me slipping in as the door closed and she moved on.
"I can't just 'calm myself', alright? She's my sister and I haven't seen her in forever!" I felt a twinge of guilt, but bit my lip. What was I supposed to say if I walked out of that room? Sorry, bro, at first I didn't want to see you but now your heart-felt sister-missing has made me reconsider. I guess I had kind of screwed myself the moment I decided to hide.
I shut the door most of the way, just enough to watch a trio pass by. "Six months, four days, and fifteen hours to be more realistic, Matt." I bit my tongue. Damn, they just weren't hurrying into that room. "I doubt that she would leave forever."
Matt groaned, and I could see him itching to light up another cigarette. "She only came home early because she was hurt- and she would have stayed the rest of the week if I hadn't threatened to drag her back myself."
The key rattled in the lock, feet shuffled, and I was headed for the elevator. Not much time, I thought hurriedly. I reached in, hit three buttons and then the lobby button before thumping to the door the maid was just leaving. She saw me coming and held it open for me, bobbing in time with her music. I smiled and nodded, closing the door just as Matt's burst open. Perfect, Mello had probably been so busy kicking and screaming that Near hadn't been able to get a word in edge-wise.
"Hold the elevator!" a voice called as the doors slid shut and denied him with a sunny ding!
I watched through the peephole as they cursed and called up the second elevator. I heard the famous ding once more, as the doors slid open. I peaked through, just to check and see if they had all gone around the corner yet, and stepped back from the portal. Fun fact: when you use a peephole, your head will block light from passing through, giving you away. Same for your feet, they'll create dark shapes beneath the door.
It was L, of course. If Matt or Mello had realized it was me, then they would have actually used Near to knock down the door. He made a humming sound, disapproving. Then Whammy's voice, quiet, "I doubt she would leave us indefinitely."
My lips twitched. Thank you, Whammy.
The elevator doors shuttered closed, and departed. Well, I've just sort of dug my own grave. Let's go. I looked out carefully through the peephole one last time, to check for lurkers. Looked like they'd all gotten on the elevator. I started for the stairwell- with any luck, they'd think I'd pulled an Elvis and left the building.
