It is a busy morning at the New York Harbor, with people loading up ships, transporting huge cargo, driving around freight cars, etc, etc. A man, operating a crane, is currently hoping that he doesn't drop the huge box.

"Come on. Come on." He says to himself as the box is moving from the ship to the steady ground.

"Whew. That was impressive." He says to himself. "Take it away, Bernie."

"Awesome." Bernie, the main dock worker responds.

Suddenly, they hear a loud roar.

"What the-"

Another load roar comes from inside the box.

"Bernie, what kind of shit is this? If that's what I think it is, we can't keep this here!" Jeff, another dock worker tells him.

"Don't worry about it." Bernie tells Jeff. "There's someone coming to pick it up."

Another loud roar emits from the box.

Nearly twenty minutes later, a bike messenger comes to the dock.

"Hi!" The messenger greets as he reaches the dock workers, getting off of his bike.

"Morning." They respond.

"You got a package for….." He pulls a clipboard from his bag. "Mr. Carl Bradmore?"

"Over there." Bernie says as he points to a large box that's next to the messenger.

The messenger turns and he looks at the box.

He hears growling.

As he lifts the tarp that is covering the box, the messenger is greeted with a roar.

The messenger gets back on his bike and he immediately takes off.

'Looks like I'll have to call Mr. Malfoy.'Bernie thinks to himself as he's moving to the other side of the dock.


"Come on! I am not an animal trainer! I am a successful lawyer trying to get some work done." Draco tells his boss. "What is the problem?"

"The problem, Draco, is that the messenger I sent to pick it up refused to pick it up."

"Bernie, it is just a cat. Why didn't the messenger put it in his satchel or whatever?" Draco asks, highly stressed out. "Does he not have a cat carrier or something?"

"I don't think you understand, Draco. When you say cat, I don't think you understand."

"No. You do not understand." Draco says as he puts his briefcase on his desk. "Do you know who that cat belongs to? That cat belongs to-"

"Yeah, yeah, Dan Anderson." Bernie responds. "That generous, fun-loving man works with that pompous real estate guy."

"Look, Andrews is my career, okay Bernie? Tori Andrews equals Draco Malfoy's career, even if he is a piece of work. I need that cat-"

Suddenly, the phone on his desk rings.

"See, you just got in and he's already calling you. You should really take a break from things, Draco. You're too uptight and beyond overworked."

"Actually, that is my fiancée."

"Oh. Her." Bernie says disapprovingly.

"Watch it. That's my woman you're talking about."

"Yeah. Amelia, the rich, yet cheap slut that thinks she's better than everyone. Amelia, who's been with nearly everybody in New York."

"May you please hold on for a second while I take this?"

"If you must." Bernie says distastefully. He put his cell phone on the desk and picks up the phone.

"Hello?"

"DAHLING!" She says as she's being followed by a crew of people, congratulating and badgering her about wedding details. "I will be in your office in….less than thirty seconds."

"I cannot wait." Draco says before she hangs up the phone.

He puts the phone back on the receiver.

"Bernie?" Draco asks as he lifts his cell phone back to his ear.

"What are you going to do about this situation? I can't keep this cat here, Li."

"Well, maybe-"

The door opens.

Amelia Andrews, 26, is a pretty girl that would be apart of Regina George's clique, 'The Plastics.'She is beyond spoiled, controlling, slutty, vapid, shallow, belittling and mean, capable of doing everything in her power to get what she wants.

"Babe!" She greets Draco.

"Hold on, Bernie." Draco says. "Hey babe." He says as he pecks Amelia's lips. "I will be with you in a moment."

"Tell me that you've called the caterer." She says over the gaggle of people who came in with her.

"Yes I did, dear. It is all taken care of." He tells her.

"I called them too, just to make sure."

"Good."

"By the way, my cousin Marie can't make it. Fucking harlot" She says. "Marie is such a selfish bitch! That only leaves 95 on my side!"

"Babe, that is not nice. She has only been with four people in her lifetime from what you and Marie told me, plus she is in labor with her first child. That is not being selfish at all."

"She's still a selfish whore who for not being here for our wedding tomorrow." She snaps.

"Then take one from my side." Draco suggests.

"Ok!" She says happily.

"Ok." He repeats. "Bernie?"

Someone puts a hat on Draco's head.

"Where were we, Bernie?"

"The cat can't stay here, Draco." Bernie repeats. "If nobody comes to pick up this cat, then I have to put it back on the boat."

"No, no, no, no, no, no." Draco says rapidly as a man is holding up a plate in each hand for Draco to pick. "I will come by after I pick up my tux at….. " He pulls out his little agenda. "I will be there at 11:25."

"Good." Bernie says.

"Now listen to me, this cat is really important to me, so can you please keep an eye on it for me, Bern?"

"I will not let it out of the cage." Bernie says. "I will see you later."

"Bye, Bern." Draco says as he ends the call.


"Well, Draco said to keep an eye on the cat." Bernie says as he hung up the phone.

"He's crazy right? I wouldn't dream of letting that thing out of the cage."

The cat roars.

"Don't forget, he's dating Amelia." Bernie says, disgusted.

"I had her in my car once." Jeff brags.

"I don't doubt that for a second." Bernie says.


"Darling, don't forget that your final fitting for your tux is at 11:05, and then you'll be meeting us at the restaurant for lunch at 12:30." Amelia tells him.

"I have it all handled." He tells her as he runs his pen down the page of his agenda. If anyone were to see his agenda, you would be shocked at how organized and detailed it is.

7am: Wake

7:10am: Shower & shave

7:30am: Get dressed

8am: Breakfast & 'The Journal'

8:30am: Drive to office

9am: Call caterers

10:05am: Amelia arrives

10:10am: Meet w/ Mr. Andrews

11:05am: Final tux fitting

12:30pm: Lunch w/ Andrews-Club

2pm: Pick up ring Cartier

3pm: Co-op Interview

4:30pm: Pick up Amelia's wed. gift

6pm: Bachelor dinner w/ chums

8:30pm: Call Amelia - Love & kisses

9pm: Review pre-nuptial agrm.

9:30pm: Bedtime.

"So, where are you two going for the honeymoon?" A man from Amelia's crew asks them.

Amelia scoffs.

"We're going to postpone the honeymoon for a couple of years. Daddy has big plans for Draco." She says rubbing his shoulder.

Draco gives the man a weak smile.

"There will be plenty of time for fun later." She finishes, and Draco can only sigh.

The phone rings, again.

"Well, duty calls." Draco says.

"Daddy's calling people!" Amelia says happily. "Let's all go upstairs."

Amelia's crew are the first ones to reach the door, while Amelia waits for Draco.

"Now Draco, I want you to know that the pre-nuptial agreement wasn't my idea. I mean, I would've let you spend his money because he has lots of it."

"I know that dear." Draco assures her.

"Now, which garter would you like, my dear?" A lady from the crew asks Amelia.

"NONE OF THEM, YOU INCOMPETENT CUNT!" Amelia snaps.