Book One
It was early morning before they reached Fowl Manor. Artemis was anxious to bring up the file of the Book on his computer, but first he decided to call in on Mother—assuming Alex hadn't already.
Angeline Fowl was bedridden. She had been since her husband's disappearance. Nervous tension, the physicians said. Nothing for it but rest and sleeping pills. That was almost a year ago.
Butler's little sister, Juliet, was sitting at the foot of the stairs. Her gaze was boring a hole in the wall. Even the glitter mascara couldn't soften her expression. Artemis had seen that look already, just before Juliet had suplexed a particularly impudent pizza boy. The suplex, Artemis gathered, was a wrestling move. An unusual obsession for a teenage girl. But then again she was, after all, a Butler.
"Problems, Juliet?"
Juliet straightened hurriedly. "My own fault, Artemis. Apparently I left a gap in the curtains. Mrs. Fowl couldn't sleep. Alex is up there now, calming her down."
"Hmm," muttered Artemis, scaling the oak staircase slowly.
He worried about this mother's condition. She hadn't seen the light of day in a long time now, and the only thing that seemed to help her was his younger brother. Then again, should she miraculously recover, emerging revitalized from her bedchamber, it would signal the end of Artemis's own extraordinary freedom. It would be back off to school, and no more spearheading criminal enterprises for you, my boy.
He knocked gently on the arched double doors.
"Mother? Are you awake?"
There were voices on the other side of the door, followed by quick, soft footsteps before one of the doors swung open. Alexander Fowl looked identical to his brother at first glance, same raven hair, same deep blue eyes. But Alex's features were soft, smaller—which made sense, the boy was only 8. He was dressed in a black Batman t-shirt, a recent obsession of his, and a pair of well-worn jeans. His hair, now getting a bit overgrown, had a brownish tinge to it from the sun and curled around his ears. There was a scattering of freckles on his left cheek—just his left cheek. Some of which were now connected by thin lines from a black marker.
"Arty!" Alex exclaimed, hugging Artemis around the waist. "Look Mum, Arty's back!"
Alex took his brother's hand, leading him into the dark room. Artemis followed him. an antique four-poster bed threw shadowy spires in the darkness. Angeline Fowl sat hunched on the bed, her pale limbs glowing white in the gloom.
"Artemis, darling. Where have you been?"
Artemis sighed and Alex relaxed his grip considerably. She recognized him. that was a good sign.
"School trip, Mother. Skiing in Austria."
"Ah, skiing," crooned Angeline. "how I miss it. Maybe when your father returns."
Artemis felt a lump in his throat. Most uncharacteristic.
"That'd be nice," Alex replied. "When Father returns."
"Your brother was just reading me the most lovely book," Angeline continued, holding up a colorful paperback. "What's it called again dear?"
"'Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets', Mum" Alex answered, he tried to smile but failed. Alex had been reading that same book to Angeline almost ever since she was bedridden. They'd never gotten past the third chapter.
"Ah yes, lovely story. By the way, we really have to get rid of that maid. She is good for absolutely nothing."
Artemis and Alex held their tongues. Juliet had been a hardworking and loyal member of the Fowl household for the past three years. Time to use Mother's absentmindedness to his advantage.
"You're right of course, Mother. I've been meaning to do it for some time. Butler has a sister I believe would be perfect for the position. I think I've mentioned her. Juliet?"
Angeline frowned. "Juliet? Yes, the name does seem familiar. Well, anyone would be better than that silly girl we have now. When can she start?"
"Straight away. I'll have Butler fetch her from the lodge."
"You're a good boy, Artemis. Both of you are. Now, give Mummy a hug."
Alex swallowed, but nonetheless the two boys stepped into the shadowy folds of their mother's robe. She smelled perfumed, like petals in water. But her arms were cold and weak.
"Oh, darlings," she whispered, and the sound sent goose bumps popping down both boys' necks. "I hear things. At night. They crawl along the pillows and into my ears."
Alex said nothing. Artemis felt that lump in his throat again.
"Perhaps we should open the curtains, Mother."
Alex stiffened, shooting his brother a feverent warning look.
"No," their mother sobbed, releasing them from her grasp. "No. because then I could see them, too."
"Mother, please."
But it was no use. Angeline was gone. She crawled to the far corner of the bed, pulling the quilt under her chin.
"Send the new girl."
"Yes, Mother."
"Send her with cucumber slices and water."
"Yes, Mother."
Angeline glared at him with crafty eyes. Then Alex spoke.
"It's alright, Mum," he said soothingly, holding up his hands as he walked towards the head of the bed. "Don't worry about a thing, we'll have it taken care of."
Angeline's expression switched as she focused on her second son. "Oh, my darling. You're not leaving already are you?"
"I have to get ready for school in the morning, silly," Alex lied hypnotically smoothly. "You should try to get some rest too. It's been a very busy day."
"Oh yes, we read a whole two chapters." Angeline said compliantly, lying on her side. "Oh, but what'll I do without you?"
"I'll be back tomorrow, Mummy. We'll read more then," He said, planting a light kiss on Angeline's forehead as her eyelids began to droop. "I'll be back. Just rest."
Angeline complied, she couldn't help it. And she drifted off as her two sons swept out of the room.
Artemis and Alex breathed a mutual sigh of relief the moment the bedroom door was closed.
"I think she's getting better," Alex said. "We actually did read two whole chapters today. And she didn't forget the character's names or anything."
Artemis smiled, something he reserved exclusively for his little brother. "Good to know. Now what is that mess all over your cheek."
"Oh, I was looking in the mirror this morning and I thought the pattern I saw in my freckles looked familiar. So I looked on the internet and realized the shape was the constaliation of Apollo. So I sketched it out 'cuz it made sense 'cuz my middle's Apollon."
"The word is constellation," Artemis said when he was finished, now grateful his brother's first name was Alexander, otherwise his arms and legs would've been covered in tiny Apollos.
"Whatever. Where did you go this time?"
"Ho Chi Minh City."
Alex turned as deadpan as a little boy could look. "You know I don't know where that is."
"Vietnam," Artemis answered, steering the boy back towards the stairs. "Butler and I brought your souvenir into the living room."
"What's it like there?"
"Sweltering."
"Arty!"
"It's hot," he rephrased. "More so than summers here."
"Can I go with you next time? Pleeeeaaase?"
"Not until you're older."
Alex huffed, "you're barely twelve, that's hardly much older. Plus, I checked the measuring chart, I'm a full 3 inches taller than you were when you were my age."
"Yes, but I'm the taller one now," Artemis rebuffed fondly. "Besides it's irrelevant, I don't think I'll be leaving the manor again for the moment."
"Does that mean you've found a fairy?"
Artemis paused, he hadn't made Alex aware of the details of his search.
The younger boy quickly explained, "while I was looking up constellations, I saw an ad. 'Irish businessman will pay large amounts of U.S. dollars to meet a fairy, sprite, leprechaun, pixie', and I thought 'I wonder who this could be'."
Artemis sighed factiously, "very well, you caught me." He prepared for the onslaught of questions, 'do they really have wings? Pointy ears?' 'did they grant you a wish?'—things like that.
"What's that got to do with Father?"
Artemis paused on the steps.
"Don't tell me this is some sort of unrelated side project. I know you don't do that anymore." Alex pressed.
Artemis's silence continued, uncharacteristically uncertain on how to proceed. "…I have a plan."
"You always have a plan," Alex countered. "That isn't an answer."
Transparency, Artemis decided. That always seemed to be the best method with Alex. "The end result then. From this venture, I intend to gain enough finance to fund expeditions to the arctic or years to come, and even more."
Alex rolled his eyes, "so this about money?" How boring.
"Not money, Alex. Gold."
"Right, right. Argon potato es, the family motto. What's that got to do with this, I mean aren't gold and money the same thing?"
"It's Aurum Potestas Est, Gold is Power. And the two are not synonymous, especially with fairy gold."
Alex's brow furrowed in confusion. "What?"
"While in Ho Chi Minh City, I procured a copy of the Fairy Book. I intend to translate it, and use that knowledge to capture a fairy and exchange them for a large amount of fairy gold."
Alex was silent for a moment. "I really can't tell if you're joking."
Artemis grinned. Transparency was the best method with Alex, especially a double bluff.
If anyone ever asked Alex who his favorite person was, he'd undoubtedly say it was his brother. Butler and Juliet were close seconds, no doubt about it, but with all that'd happened he felt Artemis needed the title more. His favorite thing about his brother wasn't, surprisingly, how smart he was, it was how driven he was to learn. Whenever Artemis found a new puzzle or topic to get into, he jumped right in, holding on with both hands and not letting go.
As much as Alex admired this, and as excited as he'd been to help in his latest project, Artemis was still wide-awake and hard at work at 11 pm. Something he felt no one his age should be doing.
With that Alex dragged himself from his half-horizontal spot on the couch and flopping into the side of his brother's chair.
"Arty," he moaned, clumsily grasping at the other boy's face. "Sleeeeeep."
Artemis continued as though he hadn't heard him. The Book was proving far more stubborn than he'd anticipated. It seemed to be almost actively resisting him. No matter which program he ran it through, the computer came up blank.
Alex's gaze slid up, wandering around the room. They'd hard-copied every page and tacked them to the walls of the study, covering the room. Artemis said sometimes it helped to have things on paper. But he'd separated and compared every character and ran comparisons with English, Chinese, Greek, Arabic, Cyrillic, and even Ogham texts. Nothing.
"Are these symbols for words or letters?" Alex asked. He figured if he couldn't persuade Artemis to go to bed himself, he could annoy him into tucking him in.
"Both." Artemis replied, moody with frustration.
Alex tried again. "Why do they look like hiroglyphs? Are mummies fairies?"
Hieroglyphics. A thought struck the older boy. Artemis opened the ancient languages file on his Power Translator and selected Egyptian.
At long last. A hit. A reoccurring pictogram of a small male figure was remarkably similar to the Anubis god representation on Tutankhamen's inner-chamber hieroglyphics. This was consistent with his other findings. The first written human stories were about fairies, suggesting that their civilization predated man's own. It would seem that the Egyptians had simply adapted an existing scripture to suit their needs.
Alex frowned, seeing that his gambit had failed. "I didn't mean that literally," he said, as Artemis frantically typed into the computer before getting up. "What are you doing?"
"There are other resemblances between Gnommish and Egyptian, just dissimilar enough to slip through the program." His brother explained, eyes glued to the printer as dozens of sheets poured out. "This has to be done manually."
Alex's eyes widened. A small variety of expressions crossed his face before he groaned quietly in submission. Looks like they'd be up for a while longer.
So the two of them had enlarged, printed, and compared every Gnommish figure to hieroglyphs. Almost every one had an Egyptian counterpart. The universal ones were easy, like the sun or birds. But a few were exclusive to the supernatural, like the Anubis figure.
"If this means 'dog god', does that make it 'god' or 'king' in fairy?" Alex asked. "Do fairies have kings?"
"I believe 'king of the fairies' is a good alteration," Artemis replied.
By midnight, Artemis fed his findings into the Macintosh. All he had to do now was press Decode. He did so, Alex clutching his arm excitedly. What emerged was a long, intricate string of meaningless gibberish.
Alex groaned as the disappointment set in, fully ready to abandon the task—as any normal child or even adult would do.
"Can you tuck me in tonight?" Alex asked, vainly hoping Artemis could be normal for a minute. Unfortunately, his brother's gaze was still locked on the mistranslated page. Alex knew the look. This book is testing me, he imagined him thinking, I will not allow it to win.
"Arty?" the younger boy prompted, "I need to go to bed."
"The letters are right, I'm certain of it," Artemis said.
"Arty it's way past bedtime."
"It's just the order that's wrong."
"Arty please."
Artemis returned to glaring at the pages. Alex joined him, his disappointment molding into resentment. Then he noticed something.
"What do these arrows mean?"
Artemis started, and then was suddenly leaning over his shoulder. "What arrows?"
Alex pointed to a tiny spearhead in the corner of the page he was looking at, quickly noticing it on others.
"This could be…a direction?" Artemis contemplated aloud.
"So, start in the center and follow the arrow out in a spiral?" Alex collaborated.
Artemis froze for a moment. Alex imagined the sounds of a computer booting up. Or chalk writing on a board.
"The computer program wasn't built to handle something like this," Artemis said, moving to grab a craft knife and ruler. "We'll have to improvise."
With that, they dissected the first page of the Book and reassembled it in the traditional Western language order: left to right, parallel rows. Then they rescanned the page and fed it through the modified Egyptian translator.
Alex bounced anxiously as the computer hummed and whirred, converting all the information to binary. Several times it stopped to ask for confirmation of a character or symbol. This happened less and less as the machine learned the new language. He jumped when two words flashed on the screen: File converted.
Artemis's fingers shook from excitement and, hopefully, exhaustion, as he clicked Print. A single page scrolled from the LaserWrite and Alex grabbed it. It was in English now. Yes, there were mistakes, some fine-tuning needed, but it was perfectly legible, and, more importantly, perfectly understandable.
Fully aware that they were probably the first humans in several thousand years to decode the magical words, Artemis switched on his desk light and began to read with his brother.
The Booke of the People.
Being instructions to our magicks
And life rules.
Carry me always, carry me well.
I a thy teacher of herb and spell.
I am thy link to power arcane.
Forget me and they magick shall wane.
Ten times ten commandments there be.
They will answer every mystery.
Cures, curses, alchemy.
These secrets shall be thine, through me.
But, Fairy, remember this above all.
I am not for those in mud that crawl.
And forever doomed shall be the one,
Who betrays my secrets one by one.
Artemis grinned excitedly, his brain spinning at the possibilities. Meanwhile Alex clutched his shirt as dread set hard into his stomach, re-reading the last stanza. The last two lines. It felt like the Book was admonishing him personally. And it made his stomach roll with nausea.
Artemis didn't seem to notice, and instead faced away from his to press the intercom button that linked him to the speaker system wired all over the house.
"Butler. Get Juliet and come up here. There are some jigsaws I need you to assemble."
Then he turned back, suddenly looking exhausted. "Come along, Alex. Let's get you to bed." And led him out the room.
The eight-year-old tried to relax. After all, he wasn't a fairy. So the Book's warning in now way applied to him. even if it could "forever doomed" was ridiculously vague. Not enough to warrant any worry.
It was well past dawn before he could sleep.
