Part 2

I felt no triumph as the Victor's Crown was placed on my head, nor the glory and pride they all said I would; my mother, father, trainers and friends- were was it. All I had was the feeling of regret and sorrow; it's hard to wear a crown forged in blood and continue smiling like you don't care. It was sickening to watch the capital people voices as another tributes death is replayed, seeing them cheer and call for the blood of innocent children, especially when they were already dead and gone, most by your hand. That hurts even more.

It got harder to wear my crown as we went through the districts, there cheers angry, there pain and hatred not hidden but searching for revenge; it's different from what we experienced in the capital. You can't blame them there tributes never stand a chance, it must be horrible knowing they're going to die, you can see it in their eyes as they see the tributes walking to the stage. But somehow they seem to all understand in the end, it's the special thing we have as districts a ability to forgive and understand others actions but I suppose this is something we must learn to do in this world. In District 11, I look down at Thresh and Rue's family. Rue's siblings resemble her so much, their heads dropped in sadness or maybe anger as we make our way up to the stage. We went through the usual process until we make it to the space were we can talk about allies or finds in the arena. There isn't much to say they weren't allies, I didn't kill them, didn't really see Rue at all. Thresh nearly killed me, but died in my place but I respected him for playing the game the way he did not ever losing himself like I had; this grandma seems to understand what I say as she gives me a nod and a smile. Rue, no words I can muster can say how sorry I am that she is dead, 12 years isn't long to live; she didn't deserve to die. What angered me more was that I had to say sorry with the world watching my masks still on. You have to put it in a general way and hope they catch the meaning. I did regret it all.

In the end, we reach District 12, there star-cross lovers would have come home if we didn't but our greeting here is different than anywhere else. As me and Cato walk on to the stage we're greeted by clapping and to my surprise Rue's four note song that makes me smile. It's not the same clapping and cheering as in the clapping, it's more of a clap of appreciation. I spot Katniss's little sister as I sit down. After the formal part it time again for speeches.

I say the general stuff and a bit more before returning to my seat, Cato's hand giving me a light squeeze before he too gives a short speech to the crowd. My eyes find Prim, she looks up at me with sadness in her eyes and then I realise why. I made a promise to Katniss that needs to be completed.

"Wait", I yell to the mayor who is about to close the ceremony.

"Katniss and Peter were some of the bravest people I ever met and have a great respected for both of them. I'm sorry for your losses and I know I can never replace these people in your lives but I made a promise to Katniss. Each family will receive a month of my winnings for as long as I live.

"Thank you for your children and the sacrifice they make".

I still have this bloody crown, my parents will love it, the power, money and the promotions. It's just a reminder of the pain the lies in my life have caused me, I want to rip it off and run away which brings me back to the present time, on the train heading back to the capital.