"That's not how it happened, Chief," JJ insists.

"You weren't there, Agent Jareau. How could you possibly know?" Straus pushes.

"Because I know Agent Morgan and Agent Prentiss. They told us what happened. The Dallas IAB investigated and confirmed the story. Why are you so determined to destroy her career? Why are you so threatened by Emily Prentiss?"

Straus leans forward, her eyes icy. "I am not threatened by Emily Prentiss. Or anyone, Agent Jareau. And you best remember that no one on your team is irreplaceable. Not even you."

JJ sits forward in her seat, refusing to be intimidated. "The suspension of Prentiss is wrong, ma'am. And I think you know that. Nothing you hear from us is going to justify your actions. Do you need anything else from me?"

Straus stares at the woman. JJ had always been strong, much stronger than her team had given her credit for. Straus had admired it. But now that she's was fighting that woman's fortitude, she hates it. She sits back in her seat.

"For now. Send in Agent Rossi," Straus commands.

"Yes, ma'am."

JJ stands and leaves the chief's office. She makes her way directly to Rossi's office, the look on her face telling people to stay out of her way. She leans in his door.

"You're up, Rossi."

Rossi sighs and stands. He and Straus rarely saw eye to eye. And, even worse, she was not pleased he had returned to the BAU. She felt any accomplishments she could have hung her hat on were now lauded on Rossi. She was very bitter. And if she could figure out a way to smash this team to pieces she would do it out of spite towards him, Hotch and Prentiss because they had dared stand up to her.

"JJ, it's going to be okay," he says with confidence he doesn't feel.

"Rossi, I know you mean well, but just don't, okay?" JJ turns and heads back to her office.

It wasn't right. They had saved Scotty Osters. They had stopped a serial killer that had only been on the radar for 2 days. The bullpen should be full of excited agents, basking in the knowledge that they had won a battle. Instead it's tense and angry. And most of all, it's quiet. Reid and Morgan stare at their desks, every once in a while, their eyes darting to Emily's. Morgan feels like it's his fault. Reid is trying to come up with stats or incidences that would render the inquisition moot.

"Fucking narcissistic bullshit," JJ mutters as she heads into her office. She shuts the door, not wanting to be disturbed in her anger. She leans against it without thinking and immediately leaps forward. The pain from her whipping reminding her that the cloud over the team is recent…and not showing signs of dissipating.


Emily paces the waiting room nervously. Finally the inner office opens and a tall, red-headed woman steps out. She extends her hand. "Hi, I'm Dr. Westfallen. You must be Agent Prentiss."

Emily nods and shakes the woman's hand. "Yes. Emily, please. Thanks for squeezing me in today. I was kind of surprised."

Westfallen shrugs. "Unfortunately, at this time of year I get a lot of cancellations. Some people go on vacation. Others think the holidays make things better. And, sadly, some just give up trying until after the new year."

Emily nods. "I see. Well, I'm sorry for them but glad for me, I guess."

"You guess?"

"Well…shrinks…um, I mean, psychologists and psychiatrists aren't usually my thing," Emily admits.

Westfallen smiles understandingly. "I know. But I promise to be gentle. Come on in."

They head into her office. Emily glances around, noting the knickknacks and books on the various shelves. She is impressed to see several first editions of some classic novels. Westfallen smiles.

"Done profiling me, Agent?"

Emily blushes. "Uh, sorry. Habit."

"It's okay. Your wife did the same thing," she relates.

"And she thinks she's not a profiler," Emily mutters proudly. "So, uh, how do you want to start this thing?"

Westfallen gestures to the couch and Emily sits down on the edge of it. The doctor takes the seat across from her and smiles.

"Why don't we start with what has you so on edge you look like you're about to run out of here and never look back?"

Emily looks down, noting she hasn't removed her coat and she is, indeed, sitting on the edge of the sofa as if getting ready to jump up. She closes her eyes to center herself, using the time to remove her coat. She forces herself to sit back and try to relax. When she opens her eyes, she stares at her hands, which are crossed in her lap.

"I got suspended today for something I did. I…I…" She takes a calming breath again. "A junkie was going to stab my partner. I shot him. He died and my partner is okay. The local cops cleared me but our section chief is making it out that I killed the kid without justification. Pending her new investigation of events I'm suspended. And I didn't realize how much I needed those credentials to feel…feel whole."

Westfallen nods. "I would say a lot of people in law enforcement feel the same. It's not so much a job as a way of life."

"Exactly. Now don't get me wrong. My wife and son are my world. I love them more than anything. I was planning to take some time off, and even to call you, but then the chief forced my hand and took my badge. I…I feel like I'm losing myself. I've worked my ass off for my career; always aiming to get to the BAU. And now it may be taken away due to the type of politics I spent my life running from. It's not fair. And I just want to break things I am so angry," Emily finishes.

Westfallen looks at Emily for a moment. "Can I ask why you spent your life running from politics? I feel it may have a lot of bearing on your personality and your goals."

Emily runs a hand through her hair. A year ago she would have just bashed her parents and the life they lead. Now she has feelings for them she had never thought she would have. Westfallen watches the play of emotions across Emily's face.

"I apologize. I didn't realize it was such a loaded question," she says sincerely.

Emily manages a small smile. "It's not loaded. Just…complicated. If Jennifer hadn't screwed up my screwed up relationship with my parents I could answer easily." Westfallen chuckles at that. "I was a show piece growing up. My parents are very involved in the political machine. I'd be paraded out when their associates were over and then be sent away to live in the shadows. I barely knew them. The times they were together they were fighting and bitter. And…and as I got older…I learned about my father's many affairs. It's only recently I learned he'd hidden a drinking problem back then that contributed to a lot of his bad decisions. Not that my mother was an angel. Image meant more to her than anything. And I spent my teen years trying to be everything they didn't want me to be."

"That sounds exhausting."

"It was. Because somehow I also knew my only way out of the hell I saw as my future was education. I think it was a nanny that taught me that. Despite some bad missteps along the way, I got into Yale and, eventually, into the FBI Academy. Everything I wanted I was doing for myself. Well, if I ignored the money my parents were feeding into my bank accounts I was doing it myself," she says with an ashamed grin.

"There's nothing wrong with getting money from your parents, Emily. Surprisingly, most college students do."

"I know. It's just…I never got…shit, I can't believe I'm about to say this." Emily stands and starts to pace. "I never got love from them. I got money. I got things. And I don't think I ever realized how much I didn't get from them until I met Jennifer and saw her relationship with her parents. They love her and they show it in actions and words." Emily smiles at a memory. "The first time her mother hugged me I stiffened up so much I thought for sure she'd never hug me again. I was…was scared of that spontaneous show of love. Luckily, she wasn't scared of me. Neither was Jennifer."

Westfallen smiles. "She doesn't strike me as the type to scare easily when the stakes are important to her."

Emily leans against the wall, staring at nothing, smiling at thoughts of JJ. "That's putting it mildly. You know, I just recently found out she'd been texting my mother for almost 3 years, telling Mother all the things I'd accomplished, forcing my mother to see that I was not a disappointment for following my own path. I know Jen is the only reason I have a relationship with my parents. And…and I find myself actually liking them." Emily turns back to Westfallen. "So, back to your question about politics, that's why it's a complicated question. I swore I'd never be like my parents because I couldn't stand them. Now…now I like them but I still wouldn't touch politics with a 10 foot pole if I could help it."

"And you say politics is now destroying your career. Is something they've done hurting you?"

Emily wraps her arms across her chest. Westfallen sees the walls go up faster than the Space Shuttle. Emily starts to pace. But unlike the easy steps of before she's now marching in irritation.

"I…I killed a kid on Monday. I had to. If I hadn't Derek would be dead. I know that. It was a good shoot. But our chief suspended me. Basically said I went rogue and until she proves otherwise I'm suspended. She did this because she put me on this team to get dirt on my boss. I refused and embarrassed her. Several other times she's tried to intimidate me and I haven't backed down. I challenge her authority just by existing and now…now she's found a way to get me out of there and put a new stooge in place. Bullshit fucking politics," Emily explains.

Westfallen thinks for a few minutes. "Emily, please don't take this the wrong way but there are a hell of a lot of things you need to work through."

Emily chuckles humorlessly. "Understatement of the year. I haven't even gotten to my undercover crap yet."

Westfallen grins. "Then we agree you'll come back to see me?'

Emily closes her eyes. She pictures Jen and Henry. And she knows if she doesn't get her head on straight, get a handle on the fury raging in her, she will lose them. She opens her eyes and raises an eyebrow at the doctor.

"When can you get me in again?"

Westfallen smiles. "Tomorrow at 9 a.m.?"

Emily shrugs. "Well, I definitely don't have to be at work. I guess it's a date, so to speak."

"Good. And, Emily, for us shrinks not being your thing, you did very well today."

Emily grins. "Thanks. See you tomorrow, Doc."

When Emily gets out to her SUV she sits staring out the window as it warms up. What if she didn't get her credentials back? What if she couldn't get past the guilt that threatens to overwhelm her? What if she knows she could never pull her gun again? What will she do with her life?

She pulls out her phone and pulls up a picture of JJ playing with Henry and his new racetrack. She smiles.

"Fuck the 'what if's'. If I lose my career I'll do what I've done since I was a kid: I'll persevere."

With that vow in mind, Emily pulls out of the parking lot and heads for home to spend the afternoon with her son.