REVELATIONS FOR THE "CONK"
Gielgud Simenon Conklin, known by most as "Conk" was a returning junior to Brentwood Academy after a year living with Mummy in Biarritz. Conk had been swept away by Mummy after the nasty and jealous Brentwood headmaster had taken as gospel silly rumors about her darling selling various party favors to fellow students, stories pushed by the semiliterate village constabulary.
The Conk had missed one helluva year, apparently-there had been a slaughter of some slut from a girl's school at one of the mixers, and a couple of the Brentwood Academy students had mysteriously disappeared later to turn up dead. And through an insane janitor later discovered to be the Scarecrow, a big-time Gotham City baddie, almost the entire school had had a collective nervous breakdown, some weird gas thing.
Mummy had seriously considered not letting Conk return to the Fifth Form, but she was now with her third husband at Monte Carlo, and the Conk was barred from a couple of casinos there already, he'd assaulted a croupier or two.
So the Conk was back at school, and ready to start up his pharmacology biz again...except most of the drug suppliers in the area had been locked up, because Robin, the little super-hero asshole, was hanging around...he'd locked the Scarecrow back up, thankfully, because all the Conk needed was to be gassed into terror, like some queer.
There were no suppliers at ALL, until the Conk had met this blonde chick in the village. She wasn't a townie, she had a New York Bronx accent, and her name was Harleen. She knew who the Conk was, and recognized his rep...and she had a new drug for him to push, and she was giving it to him almost for nothing. Conk had smoked a little...it was called Tickleweed, and it was more powerful than PCP...and reduced him to helpless giggles. He knew the upcoming semester was going to be WILD.
But he had to avoid Robin, the Conk did...one more slip-up like he'd had eighteen months ago, and he would be expelled from Brentwood. And three schools in six years...since the Second Form-was more than enough, dude.
DICK DRIVES JASON BACK.
"Thanks for taking me back to school" Jason said to Dick Grayson. "Dad has been having some health problems-he's worried about me. I thought I could transfer to public school, I did fairly well last year, but I think Dad noticed all summer that I was still sneaking out wearing my yellow cape...and he thinks more private education will cure me."
Dick grinned. Nothing would ever cure Dick of being Nightwing, and he'd loved being Robin...from fifth grade till his nineteenth year, it had been a constant thrill, and he'd known he was doing well. And Jason was a great Robin, too. Bruce was really missing Jason in Gotham, though of course Mr. Todd's point of view about his hopeful son was quite understandable. The kid risked his life every night...but shit, all last year he'd been Robin almost just as much...it was weird how many super-villains were attracted to Brentwood Academy.
Fortunately, Jason wasn't reading Dick's mind as it often seemed he could do so well. He'd been seeing some girl this summer, and he really seemed hooked on her. And, he'd befriended a cape, someone called The Osprey, and helped her take down a couple of villains in her town, including a lunatic called Stringfellow.
"Jase, don't worry about me driving you back." Dick said. "You really should take it easy with the costume though. If you don't have to get involved in crap, don't."
"You sound like the father in that song "Coward of the County"...it's by Kenny Rogers." Jason said, laughing. "Don't do the things I've done, avoid trouble if you can. You don't have to fight to be a man."
"You shouldn't sing, either." Dick said, in pain.
"I'll avoid trouble as much as you would if you were here and someone was massacring the students." Jason said this, smiling, but he was serious. "And no bullshit, Dick. You wouldn't respect me if I did any less."
Dick rolled his eyes, but he was thinking, I love this kid.
AND ANOTHER ENCOURAGING CONVERSATION
"So, how did it go, Harley dear...the peddler took the Tickleweed ? I was watching him from the car...he seems like somewhat of a dim bulb."
"Mistah J, they call them dealers now-have for about twenty-five yeahs."
"Forgive me, dear. I was thinking of the Tom Lehrer song, "The Old Dope Peddler" I have not been in touch with pushers much, murder and robbery has always been my forte."
"Yeah, don't call them pushers or peddlers. Ah shit, it don't matter what you call 'em. This kid, the Conk should really freak out the school some'pin awful."
"My child, I so look forward to that."
