Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds
Derek Morgan sauntered into the bullpen late once again, he was no longer the heroic being he was, he was beyond lost in this world without Penelope nearby. He drank a hell of a lot more than he should and he was more aggressive, he pumped iron with every free second he got and every time he was distracted from paper work he would really be tallying up how long it had been since she was taken, how long it had been since the last time he had held her in his arms.
Always coming down to the last night when he had her pinned between his wanting body and a cool wall, as her lips had curled into a smile that made him want her more. His hand grabbed the cross around his neck, he hadn't dare taken it off since forensics handed it over, the present she had gone to get was found in the car park. They had questioned if it were for him until they saw and the inscription, Noir Hero, immediately Derek knew and only when Penelope's finger prints were found on it did it verify they're worries.
He looked at the photo on his desk, when life was happy, when life was worth living; Penelope was beaming at him as she radiated pure, unadulterated happiness. He could never help but smile at the photos of her, as she smiled back at them at many different times in her life.
'Morgan...' The new tech said warily, she'd never found a place in the team, she knew she never would but she couldn't help but feel besotted with the dark skinned agent who lived for danger. Derek's head snapped up and he glared at her like he did almost all the time now. 'Hotchner wants you in the office.'
Wordlessly Derek stood and marched into the office. 'You wanted me.' He stated in a mumble. Hotch looked up at Derek and the frown lines creased together as he watched him.
'You were late again.'
'So I'll work late.'
'How longs this going to go on for Morgan?'
'Until I get her back Hotch.'
'And what if that never happens?' Hotch said putting the pen down and watching Derek contemplate the realisation that they may never get her back. 'You going to continually run yourself into the ground? Penelope wouldn't want that.'
'Damn it Hotch! Stop making it out like everyone's giving up finding her! It's been 4 months! She isn't dead.'
'I'm not saying that but with there being no leads further than that night, they want to close the case.'
'No.' Derek said his fists clenching with anger. 'How can you sit there and let that happen Hotch? I thought she was family, you cannot give up on her like that!'
'You think I want to? You think I want them to give up, Derek if I could I would lead the investigation but we aren't allowed, it's not our jurisdiction, it's not our area.'
'What so Penelope just becomes a cold case now? A lost soul, never found because no one wants to give closure.'
Hotch looked at Derek differently at that point, he did feel like a failure because they weren't helping her, they were giving up on all hope they held, after 4 months of doing as much digging as they were allowed to do they were just closing the book without finishing it up. As much as Hotch didn't want to accept it the fact was that after so long Penelope was more than likely dead by now. However, much like the others on the team, they wouldn't believe that fact until they had the evidence that told them she was dead.
'Morgan I think you need to see someone.'
'No I don't!'
'I just think that with everything, since Penelope disappeared you've been alien to us all, if she does come back as you going to be a stranger to her?'
'No, when I get my baby girl I'll be me, I'll be the man I was but until then I want whoever did this to get what's coming to them.' And with that Hotch watched the broken man stand and walk out of the room exuding anger from every possible pore on his body. This time he looked down at the photo on his desk, family day out as Penelope and Jack named them.
'Go on Jackers, just edge a little closer, call him and launch.' Penelope urged the now 5 year old, the little boy giggled and did as he and her had planned.
The little boy got close enough before sucking in a big breath. 'Daddy!' He yelled at the top of his lungs. Hotch merely turned around only to have a water bomb hit his chest and explode, drenching him with the icy cold water.
'Jack!!'
'Aunt Penny told me I could!' Penelope stood up straight, waved impishly, trying to halt her laughter and then ran only to be caught in Derek's arms.
'Not so fast baby girl.' Derek told her as he squeezed her and she laughed. 'I'm not allowed to do that but a 5 year old is?'
'Wanna be a 5 year old?' She asked him playfully and he chuckled.
'Only with you.' He said and kissed her skin on her neck. 'Now want me protect you from boss man's revenge?'
'If it's a water fight, then I'd say no, it's way too hot to refuse that.'
'Penelope Garcia!' Hotch bellowed as he approached her with a yellow water bomb, the water running off it making evident that he had just filled it up and was back for pay back. 'Water fight!!' He yelled and everyone commenced into battle of who could get the wettest.
Hotch smiled, he would always remember that day, the playfulness of it, the fun and hilarity they had had at seeing each other looking like drowned rats, their hair tangled or sticking out in every angle possible as it dried in the heat of the sun, how the girls minimal make up made tracks down their faces and how they walked around with damp clothes and soggy shoes without a care in world.
He would do anything to get her back so they could make more memories like that because if he had to be totally honest laughter just wasn't the same anymore. With losing Penelope to the unknown meant that they all lost a part of them but Derek went with Penelope and only she'd restore him.
