Reid watches Emily storm out. No one knew where she went when she left. He wasn't sure anyone had the strength to care anymore.

He looks back at the files scattered on his desk. There was nothing. He had poured over every case he could remember. He had searched files for ones he had never heard of before. He'd even tracked down the original, handwritten notes from the early days of the BAU. There must be something in the mountains of information they had to explain why things have gone so horribly wrong.

Reid squeezes his nose, trying to get the headache that was his constant companion to go away. For some reason he had thought that going to Nashville, solving that case, would somehow set things right for the team. But they had come back to Straus and her damn inquisition.

Everyone felt the chief was trying to get them to blame each other or Hotch. And she was. Someone needed to take a fall for this. A U.S. Marshall was dead, tortured until he succumbed to the wounds. Hailey was dead. Hotch was broken. Someone had to pay in Straus' eyes.

What that woman couldn't see is that they already were paying. They didn't trust each other any more. They didn't trust themselves. They existed in this office in name and body only. The spirit was dead. Or if not dead, gravely wounded.

Emily had snapped. And the worst part was, no one stepped up to her. No one tried to stop her. Everyone had waited, wanting, needing to see her kill that man. Reid had been disappointed when she didn't fire. With his leg injury he could only watch from the sidelines so he had no chance to make things right. He wanted the man dead because he deserved to die.

Reid stares down at his desk. When had he dubbed himself judge, jury and executioner? And why didn't that bother him like it should?

Reid stands. He knows there must be a file somewhere that he has missed. A file somewhere that will cauterize the infected wounds that weep within them.

"I'll be in the archives," he mutters to no one in particular as he leaves.

Instead of turning to the drugs that a small voice in his head says will make him feel better, Reid throws himself into research. He has traded one addiction for another and both are capable of destroying him.

If there is no answer to be found, what exactly will he have to live for?